Chapter 23: Chapter 23: The Correct Way to Learn
The entire video lasted 24 minutes. This duration was mentioned on the packaging, so Li Huan specifically asked Qiyana to give him at least 30 minutes.
Of course, he didn't explain the exact reason; after all, learning a new skill is a secret.
Fortunately, Kiana was quite understanding—or rather, she was very accommodating of Li Huan's peculiarities.
But enough about that; let's focus on the content of the video.
In the video, Stephen Chow—or rather, He Jin Yin—patiently explained the key points of ancient Chinese martial arts.
"The most basic principle is to have a tolerant heart, to view martial arts as a means to stop conflict rather than to engage in it. One must be tolerant of all things in the world, able to say 'you are all my wings' with sincerity. You should have the heart to forgive your wife if she cheats on you, or to smile and forgive your boyfriend even if he's two-timing you…"
"Oh, sorry, I made up the last two. If you encounter such situations, you should beat them up, no doubt about it."
Then He Jin Yin began demonstrating the effects of ancient Chinese martial arts. The initial demonstrations were simple—taking punches, baseball bat hits, and even knife cuts without any damage.
Not even a scar was left behind.
Then, He Jin Yin took it up a notch. He brought out a chainsaw and asked the demonstrator to cut at his groin with it.
The demonstrator, clearly frightened, hesitated and said, "This is too dangerous, Master He."
But He Jin Yin provocatively replied, "Dude, if I'm not worried, why are you? Are you even a man? Just cut it! I don't have all day!"
Irritated, the demonstrator swung the chainsaw at He Jin Yin's groin. Watching this, Li Huan couldn't help but feel a phantom pain in his lower body.
The chainsaw cut at He Jin Yin's groin for a good two or three minutes without breaking through his defense.
"See that? This is just the initial application of ancient Chinese martial arts," He Jin Yin explained without a hint of discomfort.
"After years of evolution, our defensive techniques have surpassed even the Shaolin Golden Bell Cover, turning your body into an impenetrable fortress—no weak points at all. Now, turn off the chainsaw."
"Master He! The chainsaw won't turn off!"
"What?! Get it away before it breaks!"
Amidst the chaos, the screen transitioned to a "nice boat" scene.
For some reason, Li Huan felt he understood something, so he checked the packaging again.
"Due to various uncontrollable factors, the originally planned single-disc tutorial has been split into two parts."
"The uncontrollable factor was probably the constant 'nice boat' scenes during the demonstrations!" Li Huan muttered as he continued watching the video.
After less than 30 seconds of the "nice boat" scene, He Jin Yin's cheerful face reappeared.
The sharp eyed Li Huan noticed that He Jin Yin had changed his pants—probably because the chainsaw had cut through the previous pair.
But He Jin Yin seemed unfazed, indicating that the chainsaw hadn't harmed him at all.
Next, He Jin Yin demonstrated his resistance to firearms—handguns, shotguns, submachine guns, grenades, Gatling guns, and sniper rifles were all used against him, and he withstood it all like Superman.
The display was so impressive that Li Huan was completely engrossed. Was it really possible to gain such incredible defense for just 500 Happiness Points? The idea captivated him.
The 24 minutes flew by, and when the video ended, Li Huan was still absorbed in it.
Tom, who had been sleeping on the floor nearby, woke up with a start. It seemed the zombie invasion had left this lazy cat sleep-deprived, so he was grabbing any chance to nap, even if it was in the middle of the night.
Then Li Huan noticed something odd.
"Wait, where's my skill? I watched the whole video, so why haven't I learned anything?"
Li Huan stared in confusion at his status screen, which showed no new skills other than the one he had previously obtained from the lottery.
"What the heck…? Wait, do I actually have to study this stuff on my own?"
A terrible thought crossed Li Huan's mind, and he slammed his fist on the table in frustration. "Are you kidding me?!"
The shout startled Tom, who leaped to the ceiling in shock, clinging there with a look of pure terror.
Li Huan took a deep breath, trying to calm himself.
"Damn it, do I really have to find time to repeatedly watch this video and learn on my own?"
His face darkened as he stared at the screen, realizing he didn't have the time to study.
Seeing that it was almost time for his next meeting, Li Huan decided to give up for now. Staying here any longer wouldn't get him anything, so it was better to leave.
Just as he was about to go, something unexpected happened.
Li Huan accidentally tripped over a chair and lost his balance, instinctively grabbing the monitor to steady himself. But as he regained his balance, he stepped on the chair leg again, causing him to fall forward and the monitor to crash into his face.
With a loud thud, Li Huan hit the ground, and the monitor landed squarely on his face.
It all happened so fast that Tom could only watch in shock as the monitor struck his owner, his expression turning to one of pity.
That must've hurt!
Tom rushed to Li Huan's side and lifted the monitor off him.
As the monitor was removed, Li Huan's eyes swirled with cartoonish stars, clearly dazed from the impact.
Tom grabbed Li Huan and shook him, then suddenly spoke in perfect English, "Are you okay?"
Tom could speak human language. In fact, he was fluent in every language on Earth. But being a cat, he didn't like to speak unless absolutely necessary.
This time, seeing his owner in such a deep stupor, he had no choice but to try and wake him up.
Tom's calls didn't seem to work. Instead, Li Huan's eyes showed a shrunken figure, mirroring his own movements as if practicing martial arts.
The unconsciousness didn't last long. Li Huan soon came to, finding Tom's cat face staring down at him.
Seeing his owner awake, Tom sighed in relief, wiping the sweat off his brow with a paw before flicking it away.
If Li Huan hadn't woken up, Tom would have been ready to use a defibrillator to perform CPR…
However, Li Huan's mind was in disarray. Just as the monitor hit his head, he felt a rush of information flooding his brain.
The information was orderly but overwhelming, causing an intense discomfort that led to his blackout. The pain from the monitor's impact wasn't enough to knock him out, but the influx of data was.
It wasn't until he had fully processed the information that he woke up.
[Congratulations on completing your studies] the system's voice chimed in, breaking the silence.
"Huh?"
[Check your status screen, and you'll understand.]
Li Huan did as instructed and saw that his skill bar now listed "Ancient Chinese Martial Arts."
"What the…?"
Li Huan was confused.
[This disc has a unique usage: while watching it, if the monitor hits your head, you instantly learn the skill.]
"What? So all the time I spent watching it was a waste? The right way to use it was just to let the monitor hit me?"
[Congratulations, you got it right.]
"You've got to be kidding me…"
Li Huan was about to lose it when suddenly—
Bang!
A gunshot rang out from outside.