Crazy Britain:They’re All Raising Me

"Who goes there?!"

"Who goes there?!"

The moment Mordred appeared, she instantly caught the attention of the two women who had nearly come to blows.

"Hey, stop playing dead. It's time for negotiations. This is your cue, bookworm. Leave the fighting to me later."

Facing the two women's gazes, Mordred casually kicked Guinevere, who was still lying on the ground like a corpse.

"Easy… Wait, I feel a little nauseous..."

As he stood up, Guinevere felt dizzy and queasy. Fortunately, this time Mordred hadn't carried him far, so his innards were still mostly intact.

But just as he looked up at Bavanzi and Koyanskaya, a prompt suddenly popped up in his vision:

[Confirmed contact with partner player Bavanzi. Team has been formed automatically.]

[Due to the special nature of this mission, certain unimplemented features are now unlocked in advance.]

[Team communication channel activated.]

Hm? Team communication channel?

Caught off guard by the sudden prompt, Guinevere paused in surprise and instinctively looked toward Bavanzi—only to see her also glancing over at him at the same moment.

Clearly, the same team notification had just appeared on her end too.

Then, Guinevere watched as the wariness and vigilance on Bavanzi's face instantly vanished and was swiftly replaced by delight.

"Gui—"

However, just before she could blurt out his name, a line of text suddenly popped up before her eyes:

[Guinevere: Wait, Bavanzi, don't say my name out loud yet!]

Huh?

Bavanzi reflexively shut her mouth.

What's going on?

That thought rose up in her mind instinctively—then she saw two more lines appear on the screen:

[Bavanzi: Huh?]

[Bavanzi: What's going on?]

Now she was thoroughly confused.

[Guinevere: You… can hear my thoughts? So that's what this is... this is the team communication channel?!]

[Bavanzi: ?]

[Guinevere: I figured it out. It seems that as long as you're focused on the channel and have the intention to communicate, your thoughts will automatically be converted into text. It's a convenient way to talk in secret.]

[Bavanzi: Whoa, that's amazing.]

[Bavanzi: So you're saying this is like a private space where no one else can hear us… just you and me... hahaha, could Artoria manage something like this?]

[Guinevere: …Probably, yeah. If she joins, the system would likely auto-add her to the party too...]

[Bavanzi: Eh? How do you kno—crap, I didn't mean to type that last part out loud!]

[Guinevere: …]

[Guinevere: Anyway, I want to ask—how did you end up fighting Chaldea? Did they provoke you?]

[Bavanzi: Ah, not exactly.]

[Bavanzi: It's just... before I entered this simulation, during the loading screen I noticed I could browse previous records. So I flipped through the last simulation and saw… well, let's just say they seemed really close with Artoria. So annoying. Just seeing them ticked me off, and then that Koyan-whatever charged at me, so I smacked her back.]

[Bavanzi: …Um, did I cause you trouble, Guinevere?]

By the end, Bavanzi's tone was laced with cautious guilt, as if worried she'd made some terrible mistake. Guinevere couldn't help but laugh softly.

[Guinevere: No, it's fine. Nothing serious. Just go along with me for now—pretend we don't know each other.]

Though their exchange seemed long, the thoughts transmitted instantly through the special channel. From an outside perspective, Guinevere didn't even pause as he stepped forward and said:

"Looks like everyone here is what you might call Heroic Spirits summoned from different eras. My name is Henry Jekyll. I'm a native Londoner, just an ordinary citizen. It's an honor to meet you all."

"Ordinary citizen? Who are you trying to fool?" Koyanskaya frowned. "That person beside you clearly looks like a Servant. No way someone like you is just a regular guy."

"Tch. Lived this long and still don't know basic manners?"

Seeing Guinevere questioned, Bavanzi couldn't hold back. Her tone immediately turned cutting:

"Snarling at someone you've just met? Some people really do let their age go to the dogs."

"Are you nuts? Just have to chime in every time, don't you?" Koyanskaya felt her blood pressure spike. "You were the one who started shouting the moment we met. Don't talk to me about manners!"

Seeing Koyanskaya's forehead veins start to bulge, Ritsuka Fujimaru quickly stepped in and pulled her aside, soothing her:

"Calm down, senpai. She's clearly trying to provoke you. If you snap now, won't that just give her exactly what she wants? Keep your cool—that's how a senior shows grace."

"Well… I mean, you're not wrong, but—"

Fujimaru circled behind her and gently began massaging her shoulders, smiling apologetically.

"It's okay, senpai. You've been fighting nonstop. Let your kouhai handle the boring negotiations from here on."

"Hmph. Fine, suit yourself."

Despite her age, Koyanskaya was clearly too straightforward to be good at this sort of thing. After a few words from Ritsuka, she sulked off quietly.

Seeing this, Bavanzi scoffed and was about to throw in another jab, but Guinevere's icon flashed in the party channel:

[Guinevere: Sis, don't provoke her again. Let's get to the point already!]

"Ahem."

With Bavanzi falling reluctantly silent, Guinevere cleared his throat and composed himself.

"In any case, there's no need to be alarmed. We come in peace. We just wanted to make contact and exchange some information. If possible, I'd like to propose we cease fighting and have a proper discussion."

"Ooh, such a polite young man," Ritsuka clapped her hands and smiled. "I'd be happy to accept your offer. We're pacifists, after all. But if the Servant over there disagrees, I can't exactly stand still and let her kill me. Hope you understand."

"Understood," Guinevere nodded. Then he turned to Bavanzi. "And what about you, miss?"

[Guinevere: Just play along. Even if it's annoying, nod or something.]

[Bavanzi: Got it!]

"I suppose I can agree," Bavanzi sighed, spreading her hands. "Even if we take a break now, it won't tip the scales in their favor. I shall mercifully grant you lowly fools this brief reprieve."

[Bavanzi: Well? Was that convincing enough, Guinevere?]

[Guinevere: Excellent.]

Giving her a subtle thumbs-up, Guinevere continued:

"As for the lady with the twin blades, let me clarify something. I'm sorry if I gave the wrong impression earlier. While I'm not a mage myself, I've assisted Holmes with several investigations that involved the 'other world.' And for my own research, I've also studied under Clock Tower magi to learn about potions."

"I don't possess any magical circuits, and my philosophy differs significantly from standard magi. So I consider myself just an ordinary person. Is that explanation acceptable?"

"No worries. Senpai was just agitated earlier and took it out on you. We honestly don't doubt your identity. After all, it's entirely plausible for a regular person to know a Servant."

Ritsuka smiled, waving her hand. But even as she spoke, her eyes subtly drifted toward Mordred beside Guinevere.

"But, if I may—who exactly is this Servant lady next to you?"

"Yes! I want to know too!" Bavanzi chimed in without thinking. "She just popped up out of nowhere and looks exactly like Artoria. Who is she?!"

[Guinevere: ?]

"Huh?" Mordred blinked. She looked at Guinevere, then at Bavanzi. "You two… know each other?"

She couldn't shake the faint sense of hostility coming from this unfamiliar Servant. And she seemed to be awfully close to her father too…

Something felt off to Mordred.

"Ah—no, of course not!" Bavanzi quickly waved her hands. "I just meant, since that guy introduced himself, shouldn't this other random person popping up also say something?"

"Shouldn't you give your name first before asking someone else's?" Mordred retorted coldly.

"Bavanzi," she replied, raising an eyebrow. "And you are?"

"Hah. Never heard of you. Must be some no-name nobody." Mordred sneered. "Listen well. I am Mordred—only rightful heir to King Arthur. The Rebel Knight!"

"Who are you calling a no-name—?!" Bavanzi's eyes widened in fury, ready to snap back, when suddenly a pink-haired man's spirit projection popped into the air.

"Eh? The Rebel Knight Mordred? That explains why you look exactly like the King I saw back at Singularity F."

"Huh? You knew my father too?" Mordred was bewildered. What was with this Singularity—why had everyone apparently met her father already?

"And who are you supposed to be, you little nobody?!" Bavanzi, interrupted mid-rant, immediately redirected her rage. "Popping out of nowhere and cutting into someone's conversation—!"

Guinevere was exhausted.

Bavanzi, Mordred, Koyanskaya—great. Three powder kegs, all ready to blow at the slightest spark. How was he supposed to advance the main story like this?

[Guinevere: Ahem. That pink one is Romani Archaman. He's… uh, someone I admire a lot. I'd really like to get on his good side.]

Then he watched as Bavanzi instantly changed her tune:

"…Well, your explanation did clear things up for me, so I suppose I'll thank you for that. Go ahead, continue."

Ignoring the surprised looks from around her, Bavanzi nodded vigorously.

Romani, oblivious to the mood, was visibly touched.

"I'm about to cry… It's so rare not to be disliked by a newly met Servant. I think the last time that happened was with Guinevere back in the Fairy Kingdom…"

"Oh!" Bavanzi's face lit up even more. "That means I'm just as perceptive as Guinevere! Yes, yes! Please, do go on!"

"Ah? I've said my piece. Do you want to ask more about Mordred's identity?"

Maybe because of the rare compliment, Romani was in high spirits.

"She's the Rebel Knight born from the union of the legendary King of Britain, King Arthur, and the fairy witch Morgan—"

"Wait, what?" Bavanzi's eyes flew wide. "Whose daughter did you say she is?!"

"Uh, King Arthur?" Romani replied, confused.

"No, the other one—her mother," Bavanzi said, shock all over her face. "She's Morgan's daughter?!"

[Guinevere: …Yes. In proper human history, Queen Morgan did bear several children. Mordred is one of them. Her other genetic contributor is… well, the Artoria from human history.]

[Bavanzi: She's the daughter of that damn Artoria and my dear mother?!]

[Guinevere: Yes… uh, in proper human history, Artoria and Morgan were sisters, so—]

[Bavanzi: That makes her… my sister?!]

At that moment, a shiver ran down Guinevere's spine.

Because in a previous simulation, Bavanzi had been so enraged just hearing someone call Artoria "Morgan's child" that she tried to kill her on the spot…

Now she was about to find out that Mordred was literally the daughter of Morgan and Artoria.

This… couldn't possibly end well.