The Misadventures of a Terrestrial Anomaly

After three days of hiking through woods of white and pink trees, Charlie came to one conclusion.

“He was right,” She groaned as she threw her bag on the ground, “There’s nothing out here.”

Her body hurt. The blisters on her feet rubbed raw so long ago that her blood-crusted socks scratched at her raw skin. The cold nights hardly caused her to stop and rest. She felt a creeping sickness that she dreaded as a telltale sign of something worse. Her skin burned from sunburn or fever. She couldn’t tell if her mind was woozy from lack of sleep or solid food or from being ill.

Nothing seemed to help besides completely ignoring the problem. Charlie hoped to find civilization and get a second opinion, but she was probably fine.

Charlie plopped down against a tree and filled her bottomless mug with water. Constant days of water and soup made her crave a beer and fried chicken sandwich. Though, after only a liquid diet for over a week, she wondered if her stomach could handle it.

After drinking her fill, she unbuttoned her grey traveling jumpsuit to check her stomach. The smell of the yellow and green ooze from the wound made her gag. She poured water over it to rinse out as much of the grossness before she rebuttoned and stood again. The stitches held together, that’s all that mattered.

“Hey Adiona,” She sighed, “How much longer until we’re there?”

At current travel rates, it will be four days until you reach your final destination.

“I can definitely make it four days,” She stretched, “I’ll just have to cut my stomach out and get some sort of weird skin patch, probably. Maybe I’ll turn into part cyborg. Who knows at this point?”

Charlie threw her bag over her shoulder and started her trek again. She debated on what she would put in her mug next. She discussed it aloud under the guise of speaking to her odd feminine robotic secretary.

“Adi, I’m tired of tomato soup. What do you think I should do next?”

“Adiona, do you think smoothies would be a better choice? What about protein shakes? Something cold would be nice”

“I think hot chocolate would be best for the next adventure. What do you think, Adi?”

“Adi! You have to help me! Is there any ice cream here? I’ll die if there’s not ice cream.”

Each of her questions went unanswered, unless it was directed at a plant, bringing up the map, or trying to identify something new. Charlie felt like a child trying to get her parents’ attention by becoming increasingly annoying. She spent the entire day singing and speaking to herself to the point of near madness. The light headedness and woozy feeling of her body didn’t help her sanity.

“Hey Adiona, is there anywhere nearby? You said there would be right? I would love to sleep in a bed again.”

The translucent map popped up and a small green circle pointed her further south. Charlie followed the direction until she found herself outside of a small village. She hid in the bushes as she inspected the bustling place. A small jailhouse, a smaller tavern, and a combination of a bank and bakery were the only three buildings at the end of a dirt road. A handful of people walked around at dusk. She wondered what day of the week it was for these people, but realized they likely worked every day anyway.

After she saw someone else ask for directions to the tavern, she decided it was safe to not be the only new person in the tiny town. She followed him into the tavern as casually as possible.

“Do you have any evanescent wine, by chance?” The boyish faced man asked.

“We have ale or moonshine.”

“Not even… normal, boring wine?” He groaned, “I guess I’ll have ale.”

This other newcomer walked over to an empty table and begrudgingly sat. Charlie looked at his clothes and realized that he definitely had more money than any other person she had met so far. And, if she realized that, other people around them did too. He looked as if he stepped out of Gabby’s dressing room with the vibrant green tunic over khaki britches. The black cloak over his shoulders hid some of the pretentious rich kid vibes, but not enough for her to be convinced he knew where he was going.

The man combed his hair from his green eyes and relaxed. His chocolatey curls reminded her of swirly cupcake frosting. He anxiously hid his gaze from everyone around him.

The bartender walked over and set the stein of ale in front of him, “You got money to pay for this?”

“Of course I have money!” He scoffed.

Charlie had seen this act many times before. He pulled out a bag of coins and picked a few out. She wasn’t sure how the currency worked in this world, as everything in the Oasis was paid for by others, but she knew carrying that much was almost screamed for trouble. Even she thought about robbing the guy to get her hands on all that gold after he showed it without a care.

“This is more than enough for an entire night, isn’t it?”

“Yessir,” He grinned, “Thank you kindly.”

The bartender wiped his hands on his apron and approached Charlie. She smiled flirtatiously and waved her fingers at him.

“What can I get you, Miss…?”

“Hey there. I’m Charlie,” She extended her hand, “Unfortunately, I don’t have much money. Is it alright if I sit here and see if some sorry sucker will buy me a drink? If not, I’ll stay out of the weather for a bit and be on my way in a moment.”

“A lovely lady like you doesn’t have any money?” He chuckled, “Might go bother the posh lord over there.”

“Oh, I don’t think I’ll do that. I’d rather spend time with someone that wouldn’t judge my smell,” She winked, “But, if you feel obliged to pity me, I’ll take an ale.”

“Hmmm… an ale for a pretty lady to sit in my bar?” He scratched his beard before pointing at her chest, “Unbutton a bit and sit by the front windows and I’ll give you one.”

Charlie laughed and popped a few buttons of her top, “I’ll take it.”

She walked across the small room and sat next to the open walls. The bartender opened the shutters to let the crisp night air in. She crossed her arms under her breasts and leaned against the table in from of her to accent her cleavage. It’s why restaurants wanted to hire beautiful people. It was a common tactic at Mickey’s bar, too. Beauty meant more people stopped in.

Charlie didn’t mind showing some cleavage to get a free drink.

“Here you go,” He sat the stein down in front of her, “Let me know if you need anything else.”

“I’ll see what I can pull in for you,” She winked, “Hopefully, I’ll make it worth it.”

The crisp air felt great on her hot skin. Even her boots were caked in mud from walking days on end. She scratched at the back of her scalp to fluff out her sweaty hair and hoped no one would mind her smell.

Just as she started to worry, a glass slammed down on the table. She jumped and looked up to see a muscular man sat next to her. He was definitely old enough to be her father, but that didn’t seem to dampen his efforts to flirt with her. She sipped her warm drink with a casual smile.

“How’s it going, darling?” The toothless man grinned, “I haven’t seen you ‘round here before.”

“I’m just stopping through for the night,” She threw her hair over her shoulder, “What about you?”

“I own one of the farms outside of town. I usually stop by on my way home to share a few drinks with some of the other farmers.”

“Isn’t that sweet?” She chuckled, “I bet you’ve got all sorts of stories. Mind sharing one?”

This was usually how Charlie kept the attention off of her while she tended Mickey’s bar. One thing braggarts loved doing was telling stories that made them look better. And, if there was one thing drunk old men loved, it was bragging.

After three more men joined her table, she finished her first glass and made eye contact with the bar tender. He brought over another stein but the farmer with his arms around her shoulders shooed him off.

“Alm, get her the good stuff. On me.”

“Aye,” He nodded.

“The good stuff?” She laughed, “What does that mean?”

“That’d be the moonshine.”

“Coming right up!”

A glass was set in front of her. She narrowed her eyes at it and swirled the contents of the glass. She mumbled to Adiona to see if she could get anything from it.

Spiked moonshine. This moonshine contains the extract of a plant known to reduce cognitive abilities and make the drinker more susceptible to suggestion. Drink with extreme caution.

Charlie didn’t think she stressed the word “extreme” enough.

“I’m not much of a moonshine gal,” She slid the glass towards the farmer, “It’d be a shame to waste it, though.”

“Then you best drink up,” He pushed it back to her.

“Well, if you insist,” She swirled the clear liquid with her finger, “I’d hate to disappoint.”

She wondered if Adiona would catch what she was trying to do.

“Purify Water” casted! Successfully turned liquid to clean water.

Charlie smirked and chugged the cold water down. A drop of water ran down her chin. It was refreshing for any cold liquid on her skin.

“Attagirl,” The toothless farmer wrapped an arm around her shoulder, “First of many, if you’d like.”

Charlie wanted to sleep in a bed, but not badly enough to go home with any of these gnarly men. She strategically waited until the door slammed and spilled the drink down the front of her and the man besides her. She squealed and stood quickly.

“Goddammit! Now I’m soaked,” She swatted the beads of liquid off of her, “Let me go get cleaned up.”

“There’s a restroom around back.”

“I can take you if you need—”

“No, no, I’m good,” She anxiously laughed, “I’m just going to try and clean up a bit. I’ve been traveling for a few days now. The moonshine probably helped with the smell, am I right?”

The group of older men grumbled at her sudden withdrawal from their table. She grabbed her bag and walked outside to the back alley. She leaned against the wall and slid down to sit on the ground. Her arms shook as she tried not to cry.

Even in this new world, people were disgusting. Her paranoid thoughts swirled through her mind with more strength than before. In situations like this, she could always call Olivia or Mikey. She even thought about Davon or Puddles but had no way to send them a message or know where she even was.

She was alone –truly alone.

Nobody would know what would have happened to her if any of them successfully drugged her. Her only friends were tricked into leaving her behind. She only had a blunt sword and the omniscient woman in her head to comfort her. Charlie held her head in her hands for a while and took deep breaths to calm herself.

“Hey, pretty boy,” A low voice chuckled, “What you go there?”

“I don’t know what you—hey! Quit that!”

She looked over to see the same group of men harassing the posh man from early. She hid behind a barrel. She didn’t want to involve herself in whatever was about to happen.

“Just give us your money. We know you’ve got it on you.”

“I will do no such thing!”

One of the three men flashed a knife as the other ones grabbed his arms. He struggled against them.

“Unhand me!”

“Or what? You’ll poke us with this stick?” He laughed and pulled a small dagger from the man’s belt, “Pathetic. How far from home are you, boy?”

“I’m not a boy!” He tried to rip his arms away, “Let go of me!”

Charlie sighed and wondered when she should step in, if at all. At least she wasn’t the only one having a terrible night.

“Just take his money and go, already.”

“What? Nobody will notice if he’s gone. Nobody around here anyway,” The one holding his left arm snickered, “Look at this jackass.”

“If anyone’s an ass, it’s you!”

The three threw him to the ground. He held his hands up to protect himself as an onslaught of punches and kicks rained down on him. Charlie sighed and realized the poor kid probably needed help if he wasn’t even trying to fight back.

“Shield!”

She wasn’t sure if it would work, but a translucent blue light formed a protective barrier around him.

“Don’t you think that’s enough?” Charlie yelled down the alley at the rumbling group.

“Hey, sweet stuff. Just meet us back inside, will you? I got you another drink. Go ahead and start on it.”

“Help!” The man yelled, “Go get the guards!”

“Shut up!”

A swift foot connected to his ribs. The man cursed as his boot crunched against the blue barrier. She wondered if they could even see it.

Shield points remaining: 47

“Guards?” Another man laughed, “What guards?”

“She’s not stupid enough to help you. Walk on, little lady.”

Charlie knew she couldn’t step aside as these three men beat him. If nobody would come rescue her with good intentions, she could at least do that for someone else. Plus, if she saved this man, he might give her enough money to find someone to heal her wounds.

“I wouldn’t go that far. Afterall, I can’t just let you kill the kid,” She pulled her sword out, “So, I guess I am stupid enough to help.”

“What are you going to do with that?”

The three assailants laughed at her. She stepped towards them and casually held the sword. Her arms trembled as she tried to hold it in any menacing way.

“Me? Oh nothing,” She laughed, “I have a different idea.”

Charlie did not know how to swing a sword, but she had taken plenty of self-defense classes and did know how to put a drunk man on his ass.

She chucked the sword at the nearest man to distract him. As he reached up to catch it, she slammed her knee into his groin. When another person grabbed her arm, she thrust her elbow into his ribs.

“Why can’t you old perverts,” She yelled, “Just calm the fuck down for one goddamn night?!”

Charlie ducked under a fist and punched directly into the throat of the man the who threw it. As the three got themselves together and surrounded her, she felt a surge of power fill her veins. One kicked her in the injury on her stomach and something inside of her snapped. Anger and anxiety burned her alive as they threw her to the ground. They chuckled and tugged at her as they pinned her to the ground.

The unalienable hatred severed her reservations on hurting any of the men around her. Her fingers stiffened and her hazel eyes seethed in rage.

“That is enough,” Her voice boomed, “Get off me.”

Spell cast: Dominate Person(s). All affected will be under your command until the spell ends.

All three of the attackers twitched at her command. She glazed over them as they backpedaled away from her. She stood and picked up the sword at her feet.

“Kneel.”

The trio fell to their knees and looked up at her. Burning fury fueled her newfound strange power.

“Who told you that you had permission to look at me?” She scoffed, “Fucking pigs.”

She walked up and kicked between the legs of the one that tried to spike her drink.

“Now, I tried,” She laughed, “I’ve had a long few days and I just wanted a drink. A nice, relaxing night would have done me well. Hit on me? Gross. Try to spike my drink? Unpleasant, but I dealt with it. I tried to be nice and let all your shitty behavior go.”

She paced around and placed her hand on the shoulder of the main instigator. She crouched down to be at his eye level. She flicked his nose and chuckled.

“But, no, no, no,” She growled, “You had to continue to be walking nightmares of humans. I’ve had enough of that.”

Charlie took a deep breath and looked down at the badly bruised man that covered his face.

“Now, maybe this idiot deserved to get his shit kicked in once in his privileged little life, but he doesn’t deserve to die because of that,” She shook her head, “Hell, I was going to let you take his money, because I get it. I had the same thought when he flashed it.”

She squatted and grabbed one of the men’s faces.

“Your lives are absolute shit. You’re out here breaking your backs. He’s never had to work a day in his goddamn life. It’s infuriating. I get it,” She threw his face, “Because of that, I am going to let you live.”

She snapped and the men fell to the ground. She walked over next to the fancy young man that tried to crawl away. She brushed his hair from his face and shook her head.

“So, this is your punishment. Every single injury you inflicted on this poor, little cupcake of a man, you’re going to do to each other,” She looked over her shoulder, “Right now.”