The Gate of Shadows

Locking the door behind us, Fenris grabbed onto me. Before I knew it, I was against the bathroom wall with him in between my thighs. It was a simple room where employees did their necessities. When I glanced at his face, his eyes lacked the life they usually had.

These arguments with Layla always got him in an awful mood, but this time, he was different. I couldn’t help but feel responsible since most were because of me. It only solidified my belief that I was a source of discord in their relationship.

If Fenris had never met me, perhaps his life would’ve been better.

Yes, I wouldn’t be a liability you must watch for all the time.

Even though that was true, I was happy to be in his embrace, without caring that it was part of his job.

Yes… That’s right. I’m a wicked woman who doesn’t care if I hurt others. As long as I can have you… Ah… I can’t, though, can I?

If I felt any guilt for hurting Layla, it was nothing compared to how unstable I would've been without Fenris’s touch.

These moments have to be enough, Lilith. They have to be! So… Please… Let me be by your side even when…

Ryker’s words replayed in my mind, making me wince.

You… don’t have a choice, do you, my love? This is your duty, all because I love you. I’m sorry for putting you in this position, my dearest light.

A long time ago, I decided to live for him. Getting used to the thought of him being with another would have to come. Reaching for his face, I touched his cheek, placing my other hand on his shoulder.

He leaned on my touch, bewildered by my reaction to his sudden approach. Usually, I would be flustered and try to get away from him if it was in a public area, but I intended to comfort him any way I could.

The poor silver wolf appeared to be having trouble finding the words he wanted to communicate to me. Feeling bold, I tugged myself towards him, kissing his lips lightly. His eyes widened, clasping onto the back of my head, yanking me into a deeper one.

It was breathtaking how passionately his tongue caressed mine. There was no hint of previous exhaustion when he did this to me. Eventually, we separated slightly, allowing us to breathe better for only a moment as our eyes met again.

His amber orbs were as radiant as always, and our cheeks were light pink. His expression changed from flustered into one of regret. Before a word could leave his lips, I clutched onto the back of his head, hauling him into another kiss.

Is it to stop this? I don’t want to hear it!

Responding to the same affection, he tugged my legs up to his waist, securing them in place. It was the same position we were in back at the alley, yet I was pushing forward this time. A soft mewl left my lips, feeling him grind himself into me as his tongue entertained mine.

Unable to hold on to my desires, I reached under my dress to tug on my lining, only for him to rip into it. A gasp left me, feeling it break under his strength. It was only a slight hole in the fabric to expose my underwear to him.

Moving it aside, he held me up with one hand, undoing his pants with the other. All while our lips didn’t stop showing affection for one another. Saliva dripped down my chin, feeling his tongue win the fight for dominance.

A soft chuckle left the wolf, enjoying the affection I was showing him. Instead of words, we let our bodies assure ourselves of our feelings. It was almost as if he told me it didn’t matter if Layla was there; our time together wouldn’t change.

Freeing his heat from his clothes, he pressed it against my intimate lips, triggering me to jitter in anticipation. A simple thrust was all it took for it to slip inside my walls, triggering him to hum within our kiss.

Using Fenris's lips, I muffled the voice his sweet touch desired to let out of me, feverously kissing him like it was the last time I would ever feel him. Every time we separated to catch our breaths. His facial expression was one of the eyes barely opened, lips glossy, wishing for more.

Bucking his hips into me, he searched for more of the sensation he only knew I could give. It made me throb for him, feeling him fill me to the brim with each thrust. If my body was enough to please him in this way, then I...

A smile rose on my lips, softly caressing his ears. It caused them to twitch, making him lean into my hand, caressing his fluffs. My expression triggered something within Fenris, prompting him to lick my lips.

His cheeks were a darker shade of pink. It wasn’t the first time he did something like that. But it was the first time I noticed how he was gazing at me. It surely was nothing else than the same way I always looked at him.

His amber orbs were affectionate towards me, twisting every thought I had within me. Ryker’s words were still present in my mind as I questioned every intention this wolf had.

Can I believe I have a part of your heart? Is it true? No… How can you love the girl that makes your life a living hell? It’s not possible.

His gaze was making my heart waver from that thought.

You can’t! You aren’t mine to have! That’s right… You’re meant to be hers alone!

Knowing that didn’t stop the storm in my heart from wanting him for me.

Please... Don’t look at me like that! I’ll want to keep it all!

The thought of someone else having him stirred an ugly emotion I couldn’t entirely control.

If I can…

Usually, Fenris started everything that happened between us, but I felt bold after seeing Layla’s rejection. A silly thought began to form, one that I could only dream about with this broken body.

Maybe... I… can make you addicted to me as much as I am to you. Will you be able to leave me then?

Clutching the back of Fenris’s hair, I locked lips with him again, kissing him as passionately as he had. The suddenness of it caused a whine to leave him as his member suddenly twitched within my depths, declaring his release.

Separating from my lips, a low groan left his, showing me an expression I had come to love. It filled me with pure ecstasy, feeling him shove himself deeper within me, intending to carry his seeds deep within my empty womb.

Or at least I hoped nothing was waiting for his barrage of swimmers rushing into my core. The feeling of his twitching heat after the explosion brought me over the edge. Clashing my lips with his again, my mind entered a state of bliss.

I refused to separate my lips from his, tangoing with his soft member while riding the high. Mainly while the sensation consumed me, making me convulse in his arms. My overly affection didn’t bother him much.

However, we both needed to breathe to live. When our lips separated, I felt his heavy breathing against my neck. We both were desperately panting for air, unable to catch ourselves after the loving we had endured.

Clinging onto Fenris, I couldn’t help but feel possessive after seeing Fenris fight with Layla and her open advances on him. I thought I had my emotions in control, but perhaps it was because the bracelet was working back then.

Or maybe it was a placebo effect of thinking they worked. No matter what it was, it didn’t change that I ignored it then, allowing the darkness within me to grow stronger daily and making my obsession with this loving wolf spiral.

The years since the fall allowed me to control my emotions better when I was a kid or a teen, but when it came to Fenris, I had little to no discipline over myself. My feelings for him couldn’t be held in a simple container.

So, I would instead try to imprint myself into this wolf's heart so that he could never live without me, even while he held another woman in his arms. However, I want his desire to be because of me, not because of this duty he had to carry out.

I desired to be something more than his burden or duty—someone who could proudly stand by his side.

A dream…

It could've been possible if I wasn’t the vessel to the gate. The source of all his sorrows was me and everything I stood for. There was only one way to make it feasible: to eliminate what made me terrifying.

But if I lose that… will I lose you to the beautiful Layla?

It didn’t matter though. If I did lose him, at least he would be free from all the nightmares that I caused him. There was nothing more than I desired than my light to be free and happy. However, what was most important was to see that radiant smile that had attracted me to him before the fall.

These moments will have to be enough for now. I can’t ask any more of you, my love.

A smile arose on my lips again once I saw Fenris's expression on his face.

Flustered, charming... You own my heart, little wolf.

I couldn’t resist kissing him once again. A startling banging came from the door before my lips could touch his. He swiftly placed my feet back on the floor, allowing me to fix my clothing. It suddenly hit me that we weren’t in the room but in a public area.

After fixing our clothes, we answered the door and witnessed a human man urgently waiting behind it. Fenris apologized for locking the door and said he needed a private place to chat with his charge.

My protector’s explanation didn’t amuse the man who rushed us out, cursing at us. The entire event left me giggling before I glanced towards my adorable wolf, where I felt my heart skip, spotting a genuine smile on his lips.

It wasn’t as radiant as when he was a child, but it was alluring. Perhaps his innocence, which had been robbed that day, was what I was perceiving missing. He reached for me with his hand, and with a brief hesitation, I clasped onto it.

From there, he led me toward the library, where we spent most of the day.

Though... it wasn’t long until...