Chapter 28: Worry
I stopped. I halted. My mind was still reeling, blood pumping frantically through my veins. I had arrived at the tree wall, the border marked by colored bushes. Those were the safe ones. The ones deeper in, disguised as regular plants, were the truly dangerous traps, so I couldn’t just wade through them as a shortcut.
I took a deep breath and paused to evaluate my choices. I was still in dangerous territory, so I kept on walking towards where the gate should be.
Calm. I tried to calm down. There were guards up on the trees, and I knew I could call for them, but that might just delay me further. I needed help, and it was no guarantee I’d get it from the authorities. Certainly not on time, for bureaucracy was slow. But also because I didn’t trust the guards, and my parents had plenty of enemies in high places.
My injured hand jostled as I picked up the pace, bleeding profusely and sending a fresh flare of pain into my mind. I ignored it and pushed forward, until I heard a sharp rustle from above the canopy. It didn’t come from the wilds beyond, but from the tamed perimeter of the deadliest of plants.
I was startled as someone dropped from high up. They grabbed at branches on their way down to arrest their momentum and not splatter on the ground.
The person landed a moment later, revealed to be a belfegor man. His skin was as brown as the trees, and similarly textured as the bark. It was hard to make out his features under the shadows.
“Hello.” he said politely, confidently. I had already drawn my wand, fire mana swirling around me.
I forced myself to relax, knowing this was a guard. I couldn’t be sure, I could never be sure, but the guards here tended to be more trustworthy than the ones in the city proper.
I decided to take a leap of faith and tell them of my plight.
“Level 60 Hornse. My parents are out there right now, fighting it.” I pointed towards the rainforest.
The guard raised a brow. “A hornse… here?”
“Yes. My parents are strong adventurerrs, over level 40 Mutations. They told me to go ahead, and I must deliver a message for them now… But please help if you can!”
I didn’t wait for a response and just bolted away, towards the gate in the distance. I heard a faint query about my injury from behind me, but I did not pay the wall guard any further mind.
I made it to the ramp, and then climbed my way to the gate. I groaned internally when the guard there stopped me. They were the regular ones I was pretty sure. The gate guards didn’t live with the wall community or anything.
“Hey, kid,” a woman said. “What are you doing out there, all alone and at this time of day?” Her eyes fell on my bleeding hand. “You’re also injured! Let me look at that!
I pulled my hand away, fighting hard not to wince at the pain.
“It looks worse than it is,” I lied. I was already feeling lightheaded from the blood loss and might faint at any time.“I was just out with my parents, hunting.”
“Oh?” She still wanted to take a look at my injury, but held herself back. “Hmm, well if your parents are adventurers then that does make sense… But where are they now?”
“Oh, still out there. They wanted to stay the night, but I wasn’t allowed to,” I affected a pout that was visible through the gaps in my helmet. “So I insisted that I can make my way back on my own.”
“And then you got injured,” she waved for me to pass. “Why did they even send you back alone? Be more careful next time!”
“I will!” I crossed the wooden bridge, and then reached the next set of gates. This time I was recognized as the daughter of Mahka and Rallem Zharignan.
I gave them the same story I told the other guards, and they reluctantly waved me through.
“Fucking piss hunters. Irresponsible. Getting their child hurt.”
Shut up. You don’t fucking know anything! I clenched hard at my fists, hearing the utterance as I left.
I broke into a run, before I could say something that would only get me in trouble. My parents were wonderful people, and I’m the one who abandoned them!
The thought was silly, and I knew that. If a friend were in the same situation, then thought the same thing, I would think that they were wrong. But my emotions were running especially high right now, and I truly cared about Mom and Dad. I was just worried.
I’d go examine those thoughts later once I actually had the time for self-discovery.
I made it to my destination in record time, crossing through Baston and Fiya’s garden, and into the house and store beyond. The door shook, and I felt a new sting of pain across my body. It took a moment for the haze in my mind to clear, before I remembered that I had to turn the knob to open it.
The embarrassment did not last long, I didn’t care at the moment. I entered the house to find Baston holding his wand and surrounded by a wave of wana, meanwhile Fiya had exchanged her prosthetic for a mace. The two were clearly ready for battle.
The two adults in the room sighed in relief, though there was still an underlying tension coiled across their body.
“Haell?” Baston ventured. “What… Do you want to knock down our door?”
“You scared us!” Fiya exclaimed, trying to inject some levity into the situation. Granuel was peeking out from behind a display of plants.
I took a deep breath, and then shouted in a hurry. “Level60hornsemomdadfighthelpthem!”
Baston and Fiya took only a moment to digest my words, before immediately chucking on some armor. “Where to!?” the fountan woman asked as she was already on her way out the door.
“Uhhh…” I flagged. “South! Definitely south. Maybe… maybe southwest?”
I hated myself for not knowing for sure. It could make the difference. If my parents die… if they do, I… I…
“Wwaaaaahhhhhhh!!!” I broke down into tears, falling right where I was. Baston gave me a sympathetic look as he hurried out the door himself, but he didn’t stop, only shouting back to his son. “Granuel, lock the door! Kids, take care of each other!”
And with that, they were gone.
~~~
Granuel hovered worriedly nearby as I sniffled and cried.
“Haell… are you okay?”
“No.” I shook my head. I must’ve answered the same question a dozen times already.
“Oh…”
The boy was fidgeting, uncertain, and worried. He wasn’t good at this, but I supposed that was only to be expected. It took a long time for me to learn how to comfort someone else myself, and I still sucked terribly at it.
I took a few more minutes to be sad and worried, before I finally took charge again.
“Okay!” I slapped myself on both cheeks. “Let’s go!”
“Yay you’re back!”
“Huh? When was I ever gone?”
“Oh, well… where are we going?” He didn’t answer the question, I didn’t press.
“My house. That’s where my parents will likely go first when they come back, and while I doubt anything’s going to happen, Grandpa is there so we’ll at least be with an adult. I wanted to tell him about what happened anyway. I’ll also drag Moonwash over as well.”
“Okay!”
We did as I said, and went to pick up Moonwash. She was working on some sort of robe, and I just sat there for a few minutes, almost dazed and stewing in my worry.
Moonwash surprisingly left it unfinished, putting her work down and turning to me. “Haell. Is something wrong?”
Her face remained neutral, but I knew that for my friend to even ask meant that she really, truly cared.
“I– No.” I explained to her what had happened.
“I see. I hope they’ll be alright.”
“Yeah…”
Not knowing what else to say, I stood up to leave, and Moonwash followed without another word.
I eventually found myself back at home. But it was quiet and lonely without either Mom or Dad… who might be dead right now…
I swallowed and held back my tears. I knocked at Grandpa’s room, and waited for a few minutes until he was finally able to get up and meet us. I could have hurried him up, but his body wasn’t in the best state as it was. It’s hard to hold up his massive weight along with his age, and hurrying wouldn’t really have done anything.
Eventually, all four of us made our way to the living room, and I lit the fireplace with a casual application of magic. Moonwash flipped the light switches on.
I got around to finally healing my hand over a potted flower as I explained the situation to my grandfather.
“...and so I fled… by myself…” Tears were streaming down my face as I finished the explanation, but my grandfather… laughed?
“Hah! Stupid child!”
Bewildered, I glared at him, a confused hiss whistling out of my mouth.
“Not in the way you’re thinking, no! It’s just a level 60 Hornse? You think that would be enough to take out those two!?”
“There were others. A herd of them.”
“Hah! That’s my son you’re talking about! And the wife he’s chosen! If they can’t beat something so weak, then that's all they were worth in the end!”
“No!” I shouted forcefully, in response. “Are you not worried!? They might die!”
Grandpa smirked. “How about you Haell? Do you not have faith in your parents?”
“Of course I do!” I sniffed. “I just don’t want them to die…”
He went quiet after that, seeing me visibly distressed. It was something that happened far too infrequently for a child allegedly of my age.
“You’re right, Haell. I’m sorry,” Grandpa eventually said. “I… It’s a bad habit. It’s how I’ve always thought. But even my victories, I…” he looked around the living room, spotting several paintings, medals, and trophies of various monster parts. Some were about him, others were from my parents’ exploits. “It would be a lie to say that I wasn’t proud of them anymore. But I do have regrets. And believing in power above all is one of them.”
I sniffed. “I want power.”
He allowed himself a chuckle. “I know. That’s good. Power is good to have. But it’s not everything, and I acted for so long like it was…”
He participated in the conquest of this continent. Of the other continents too. He enabled the campaign of the angels. He killed so many people, and as a result, their ways of life were destroyed.
I loved him anyway.
“It’s fine, Grandpa. Well, it’s not, but you’re not dead yet. Don’t just give up. Maybe you’ll even beat old age again! Attain immortality! And then, I don’t know, help them this time around!”
He smiled sadly, affecting a cheer that we both knew he didn’t feel. “Yeah! I’m still alive! I can still make it! I just have to try and win!" His voice was loud, but the excitement was clearly fake. “Maybe… maybe I’ll get to see this demon you’re talking about. I’d love to see how Shanayah would react.”
The conversation shifted from there, from my recent training to Grandpa’s usual reminiscing and boasting.
I… wasn’t sure whether I should reveal to Granuel and Moonwash what a demon was. It wasn’t a common concept here, but given who the empress was… it could be something that could get me exposed before I was ready to face literally anything they could throw at me and win.
I had them swear to secrecy about everything mentioned here, and they both agreed, although I could almost feel the curiosity wafting off of Moonwash even if she did ultimately hold herself back. Today just wasn’t the day to talk about such things, what with me still being unspeakably worried about whether the only parents I ever loved were still alive.
Nighttime arrived as I grew more and more restless. My mind was beset with worry for my parents, and for their friends who came looking for them. I was tired and exhausted from the long day I had, but I found plenty of nervous energy that I had to burn, so I paced repeatedly around the house, often peeking out the windows.
“I’ve been training with my parents,” Granuel began, “I know how to toss rocks around, but armor, keeping myself safe, and all that is so complicated! But once I learn, maybe I can finally go out with you on your hunts! Adventurers earn a lot of money, right?”
The silence had finally become too uncomfortable, and my friend was just trying to fill it however he could, as well as to perhaps distract me from my worries. I took the lifeline I’d been given, even if the choice of topic might have been poor given what I was worried about in the first place. “Well, we’re all rich, right? I think it’s pretty obvious that adventurers do earn a lot of money.”
“Ooohhh! I like that! The Harvesters will get all the gold!”
Moonwash also spoke of her plans over dinner. She understood the necessity of learning how to defend herself, and she knew that fighting did give a boost to leveling speed, albeit she was already a prodigy in that regard already. More was always better.
Eventually, after hours of conversation, the both of them grew tired and dozed off on the couch. I settled into a sofa after draping a blanket over them. Grandpa was nearby, still awake, and staring into the flames of a campfire, deep in thought.
“Join me, Haell,” He finally said after a few minutes. He got off his rocking chair and walked heavily toward the dining room. Moonwash and Granuel stirred, but neither of them woke.”
“So, Haell,” Grandpa began once we had seated ourselves back in the dining room, “I want to tell you a story. It’s not a good story, but I think it’s one that’s important, especially for you.”
“Right…” I said warily. The timing was kinda shit for a serious talk, and he had clearly waited for an opportunity for us to be alone.
Grandpa nodded, and righted himself on his seat. “You’ve heard the stories, of how the angels made the fountans and the ishkawtans. They blessed them, a holy communion. A new species created with purpose and affection.”
“Bullshit,” I snorted.
“True. I probably knew it was bullshit, even back then. But there is truth there. Like what you’ve surmised as to how they were able to create a whole new species is mostly correct; with Mutations, extra materials, and shit. I have watched as so many people were gathered up. Humans. Mostly from the scattered territories that didn’t yet bend the knee to the empire. They were all collected into these camps, and slowly they died out, until finally the first ishkawtan and fountan of Varyala were born.”
My eyes widened. I was less surprised by the revelation, but by getting actual confirmation. The silence hung thickly for a few seconds, until I was finally able to formulate a response. “That’s fucked up.”
“Oh it is, but it gets worse! The ones who did succeed? The winners? Well, how do you think we have so many of them now, the ishkawtans and the fountans?”
I sucked in a sharp breath, wincing. I was already worried sick, so this just added to the soup of my emotions, leaving me a confused and chaotic creature.
I just wanted my parents back right now so I could cry into their embrace.
But this was not a truth I could run away from. I was glad that my grandfather was here, so it wouldn’t remain hidden. “They were forced… to make more.”
“To breed, yes. You’re not stupid Haell, and neither am I. I wouldn’t normally tell this to someone your age, or just anyone in general. Not even if you were an old soul, a reincarnator.”
“Not that old. Nothing compared to even you, much less what else is out there.”
“True, true. But you do understand why I’m telling you this, yes?”
“...because if I change my species, then that cruelty is what I might have to face.”
“Exactly. So think long and hard if you really want to go down the path you follow. Because even if you somehow miraculously succeed…”
He didn’t need to finish the sentence. We both knew what was at stake.
I was silent for a while, alternately worrying about my parents, and then my future as a demon.
“I just have to win,” I finally said. Grandpa had nearly dozed off.
“Hnh… what?”
“No matter how they react, no matter what people think of me being a demon. I just have to be strong enough that it won’t matter. My freedom will be won through power.” The only alternative is luck, and I cannot rely on that.
Grandpa grinned. He burst into rapturous laughter. “Exactly! That’s exactly right, Haell! Whether you’re right or wrong, things will work out as long as you’re powerful!!”
“I’d rather be both right and victorious, but hell yeahhh!!!”
I managed to forget just for a little while, all the things I had to worry about.
~~~
“Haell. Hey.”
I woke up blearily, wiping the drool off my face and the dining table. I looked at who was shaking my shoulders, and saw a familiar face.
“Mom…” Behind her was my Dad, who looked like he had seen better days, but they both stood proud and tall, unbroken. “Mom! Dad!”
I hurriedly leapt out of my chair as if they’d suddenly disappear if I was any slower. I tripped and nearly fell, but they caught me, supporting my body even as dried blood covered them in places. Most of it, I realized, was not theirs.
Relief flooded through my system as I clung to my parents. My knees felt weak, and I couldn’t muster the strength to keep standing. Mom and Dad held me up as I broke down crying, patting me on the back, and whispering soft assurances into my ears.