RE: Filthy Gamer in Narutoverse

Hentai Shinobi Rule 50: When fingers feel waning, it is a dick you're lacking.

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19th September, Tongueday.

[Promotion Quest: Spy Extraction

Summary: Recover the spy hidden as one of Kame Clan's useless scions currently visiting a town near Konoha's western border from Iwagakure. However, the host must complete another unsanctioned mission linked to this quest to maintain the perfect record.

Rewards: 24000 Ryo; 5 SP; New Title; New Skill Tree

Failure: Host's promotion suspended; A Chance of admission into Anbu or Root; New Title; New Skill Tree]

Kai wasn't the least bit tempted by Anbu's position despite the skill tree and titles most likely related to Anbu Operatives. Why would anyone be happy to act like Konoha's blade, emotionally and apathetic? Kai can eventually learn their skills after some snooping. Instead, he focused on his growth. Mastering Yin and Yang Nature Transformations allowed him to master all the academy skills—Finally!

[Clone Jutsu (E) (5/5)]

His trait also revealed additional benchmark rewards from hitting 20% of Yin and Yang Nature stats.

[Yin Prodigy: Behind your seemingly monstrous ability to weave your spiritual energy at a thought lies disciplined practice that shamed every nay-sayer. You are prodigious not in Yin Release but in sheer hard work.

Effects: Reduces the requirements of leveling any skill related to Yin Release by 50% (Active)]

[Yang Prodigy: Behind your seemingly monstrous ability to weave your physical energy at a thought lies disciplined practice that shamed every nay-sayer. You are prodigious not in Yang Release but in sheer hard work.

Effects: Reduces the requirements of leveling any skill related to Yang Release by 50% (Active)]

Unlike the benchmarks for his previous raw stats, the ones related to elemental affinities did not unlock any unique skills. Still, these 'effects' were what every other shinobi would enjoy once they mastered their Elemental Releases. So, the only thing setting Kai above others was his earlier mastery over two rarer elements involved more with Fuinjutsu than other elemental jutsu. His cooking skills had risen magnificently!

[Noble Cook (D) (10→17/25): Only experience and knowledge set a novice from Noble's cook. Yet, these dishes only satiate the tastebuds. Stand tall, you can cook. It's an information-granting skill that offers hundreds of recipes and bits about unique reactions between several ingredients to bestow heaven upon the tongue.

Next Level: Cook 2744/3193 different dishes Or 2 SP.]

To be frank, Kai mostly cheated through the skill by just playing around with the ratios of the spices used in the same meals. Sometimes, he would make the food slightly tangier, saltier, spicier, and whatnot. Still, cooking three meals for himself, Kushina, and Mito by varying the spices for three meals significantly increased the numbers.

[Novice Smith (E) (9→10/10): Across the continent echoes one voice—let's get smithing. This information-granting skill enables the host to learn and practice the basics of smithcraft, including but not limited to blacksmithing and carving.]

[Noble Smith (D) (1/25): The Elemental Continent enjoyed its fair share of weapon enthusiasts across all social hierarchies. But beyond weaponry lies a fine artistic smithing. As they say—let's get smithing.

Next Level: Craft/Mold/Modify 3/50 different items or 2 SP.]

[Skill Tree Evolution: Master Smith (C) (0/50)]

[Master Smith (C) (0/50) (Locked)

Unlocking Conditions: 5 SP, 150 Chakra, 100 Perception, Mastered Skill: Noble Smith (D).]

Kai hadn't focused on artistic craftsmanship, even if he desired to cast lifelike statues of his favorite onaholes… but that was a distant ambition. Wasn't there a hobby of collecting sensual figurines in his previous world? Maybe he could introduce something similar to the noble collectors spending their wealth on bronze or golden casts of old-fashioned, half-naked seductresses.

He crafted or tweaked the three items for Kushina's, Mikoto's, and Tsunade's Birthday present. He didn't have too much free time during the period since it took a lot of chakra and time to master the two Elemental Releases.

Lastly, Kai unlocked a skill yesterday for an extraordinary purpose—

[Sensual Mouth (D) (1/10): It's an extension of Ero Hands that allows the masterful display of one's mouth on another's body for utmost sexual relief.

Next Level: Induce 0/25 orgasms from any target or 2 SP.]

Kai just wanted to learn how to be a better kisser, which this shed enough light upon. Recalling the results, the relentlessly drained Hobgoblin felt the costs were worth every droplet.

Still, Kai's most recent venture into newly discovered debauched lands did not limit him. He'd been growing the past few months, and the somewhat decline in completing missions may have reduced the overall SP acquisitions, but it did little to dampen his stats.

Team 9 completed 43 D-ranked and 19 C-ranked missions in the last five months!

[Name: Kai

Age: 9

Title: Konoha's Genin

Gamer Traits: Skill Tree; Sleepless Gamer

Skill Points: 788→1375

Chakra: 166→190 (2/hr) (1+100%)

Physique: 183→194

Mental: 151→158

Perception: 174→177

Chakra Control: 20.3→21.6%

Fire: 0%

Wind: 0%

Lightning: 0%

Earth: 0%

Water: 0%

Yin: 20%

Yang: 20%

Skills:

Titles:]

Aside from his mental status category, which required Kai to focus on it alone lest he risked others peering into his memories and discovering his closely guarded kinks, Kai made the most decent progress in the chakra status category. It was due to all the time spent consuming and recovering his Chakra Reserves while training the two Elemental Releases.

"Are you listening?" Kushina's nudging shoulder snapped Kai out of his victorious thoughts as he constantly replayed the last night's glorious event. Others glanced at him pointedly. After all, Kai didn't hide his wide grin, the low hums, and the constant sway of his legs when he sat on the nearby branch to let Tsunade brief them on the mission.

How could he not feel uppity? Mito helped him relieve a series of intense loads! His legs just felt light and breezy. It was as if something sucked all his indignations on Mito's matter, and he felt satisfied knowing that he exacted some just servings from Mito in Kushina's stead.

Oh, yeah. Kushina would explode into a fiery temper if she suspected Kai's 'self-righteous' thoughts. Fortunately, she didn't.

"I am," Kai shrugged. "We just have to ensure the spy's safety, right?"

"And capturing Iwa's Shinobi Team following him alive," Tsunade asserted. The stern warning in her voice wasn't lost on the remaining quartet as the blonde continued after a short breath. "Not every mission is as cut and dry as the usual D-ranked and C-ranked missions. Strength and technique alone aren't the requirements of becoming a Chunin, and I believe you three have what it takes to become one. I'd like to handle your promotion before I become temporarily unavailable."

"What about her?" Mikoto shot Nono a wary look.

"Me?" Nono pointed a finger at herself before smiling. "I asked Tsunade-sama when she planned to apply for her team's promotion."

"Why?" Kai blinked. He had no idea about it and questioned the girl.

"Enough chattering," Tsunade scoffed and interjected. "I'll be incredibly transparent on this matter—becoming a Chunin again after failing the promotion mission is too challenging. You would lose the administration's trust."

"I mean… Hashirama Senju wasn't a Chunin or a Jonin," Kai mumbled. "He just became the Kage because these ranks didn't exist before."

Tsunade's glare turned flat. "I'm warning you, Kai. However you act, including your current remarks, will all be in the report."

Kai tilted his head before nodding.

"Please add a few more words then, Sensei—I would like our Team to celebrate the successful completion of the mission by visiting an onsen~!"

The corner of Tsunade's lips twitched as another voice perked up.

"Please make it a mixed bath, Tsunade-sama," Nono adjusted her glasses before staring at Kai and offering a sincere smile. "I'd like to become friends with your team. I read that skinship does wonders for that."

"Absolutely not!" Kushina stirred with a fierce glower. "You don't see Kai naked, dattebane! Only I—"

"Has anyone ever completed a mission naked?" Kai suddenly spoke. "Would that be a new record of some sort?"

Mikoto exhaled.

'I don't like anything about the mission… but the onsen does sound nice.'

"I hope none of you die," Tsunade interjected with a cold snort before snapping her fingers as the temporary seal around them dispersed. "We're moving out."

<<<>>>

Kai could understand the intent behind the mission. Although he didn't know the entire story of the other three Great Shinobi Villages rooting out Konoha's spy, he realized that the village ordered the spy hidden in the Kame Clan to create a mission in Iwagakure, acquire a renowned Shinobi Team, and venture near Konoha's border into a town called the Red Strip. It was a territory known for crime and smuggling, allowing the import of goods from the West into the East and the export of materials from the East into the barren West.

Assuming the role of one of the many useless scions known for their lecherous behaviors and kink-related obsessions, the Red Strip Town was the perfect spot for the unknown Spy's travel since it accommodated an economy substantially supported by the earnings from brothels and the lavish escorts spending their wealth for smuggled goods and drugs.

Team 9 needed two days to travel from Konoha to the Red Strip Town, their first target being the civilian town's overlord—Mayor Jin Lin. They would knock out the woman cold before assuming her likeness and surrounding the team with the Kame Clan's spy. Mikoto would secure the package as the rest tackled the team. Mistake was not an option.

Yet, Kai already noticed something after the fourth hour of their travel.

"Wait!" Kai frowned and paused as others swiftly gathered around in the surrounding branches.

"What happened?" Tsunade questioned while instantly spreading her senses, something the wary Kushina and Mikoto mimicked. The trio also sensed a pulse of chakra from Kai since his sensory technique was markedly ordinary and unassuming compared to their talents. Surprising others, Nono released a similar pulse, which felt less refined than Kai's control.

"Hmm," Kai nodded before glancing at Tsunade. "The surroundings are clear. My stomach's feeling unwell, Sensei. I need a few minutes."

Tsunade's expression pinched into a frown before she snapped, "Stop wasting our time, Kai."

Kai, however, insisted on the matter until Tsunade huffed and excused him.

After ensuring a safe distance from the team, Kai quickly retrieved a parchment and ink pen from his storage scroll to scribble something. Then, he formed a familiar hand seal but refrained from creating the usual plume of smoke around him to keep others from noticing what he was up to. So, his body eerily transitioned into a weird, mutated mix of a man and a chameleon, whose odd yellow scales suddenly began to morph and meld with the surroundings.

Next, Kai carefully retraced his steps where his team waited, mostly annoyed by Kai's antics. However, they knew Kai. When was the last time he willingly interrupted any mission? So, even Kushina's annoyance was a mere facade, a surprisingly good one at that.

Kai approached the idle Tsunade, momentarily wondering where to stick the message. It had to be away from Nono's prying, fake-bespectacled eyes. With her arms crossed under her firmly wrapped bosom and equipped with a secure Shinobi's attire, Kai didn't have many options—good for him.

Holding back a giggle, Kai ignored Tsunade's thigh pouch—which could alert Nono—and gingerly slipped his fingers through the back of Tsunade's trousers. The woman barely restrained her reaction as she felt Kai moving past an inch and snatching a mile by stuffing something between her left butt cheek and undergarment. The sensations of his hand lived rent-free in her mind as she experienced the same thing when the cheeky asshole kept his hands on the same spot for a few more seconds before retreating.

'I should break his hand,' Tsunade twitched. 'No… the boy's skilled with his hands, and the war's almost upon us. I know what will hurt him more. I should start calling him Kai-chan, Harem-chan, or Alpha-chan for a week… a month sounds better. That'll teach him.'

Still, Tsunade couldn't help but wonder what message Kai wished to share. It was apparent that Kai did not want his team, or rather Nono Yakushi, to know what he found. So, Tsunade must check the message later in her privy during their rest.

"Hey, sorry for the wait!" Kai arrived with a grin. "I hope none of you perverts tried spying on me as I took a dump!"

Nono's brows scrunched with disgust, a look shared with others as Kai scoffed at them.

"Don't act like you guys don't do it. Hey, especially you, Bubbles!"

Kushina's face turned crimson as she glowered with rage.

"I'm going to kill you after the mission, Kai-chan!"

"She's right, Kai-chan," Tsunade scoffed, instantly stumping the temperament youth. "Stop screwing around."

"Exactly, Kai-chan," Mikoto snorted.

"Kai-chan sounds cute," Nono's expression eased as she tilted her head. "I'll call you that, too."

Kai stared at everyone. The only one who hurt him was Tsunade…

Oof.

He shouldn't have been so impatient with his desires. Disrespect begets disrespect.

Tsunade's annoyance was only fair.

But where else could Kai have stuffed that note?

Well, the back of the bandages around Tsunade's right thigh or her ankles were a safe option. But Kai was always a risk taker… so dem cheeks it was.

<<<>>>

There were several forms of Sensory Techniques. The basic one was what Kai and Nono had access to, where they displayed their precise control by creating a pulse of chakra that did not dissipate instantly, allowing them to sense from as a form of feedback. Then, some directly tapped into the world's Chakra Network, which Orochimaru discussed. These unreasonable prodigies didn't need to create a pulse of chakra sensed by others.

Kushina's clan was known to create such individuals. Mikoto's Sharingan also allowed her to achieve the same effect, and Tsunade must have inherited all of her predecessor's goodness alongside the debuffs of being a raging alcoholic and gambler to accomplish the same.

But the world of sensory Shinobi didn't end with these two techniques.

A skilled sensor could send a discreet Chakra Pulse through the ground, masking it and making it difficult for others to sense it. The same could be said for the other elements. Going a step beyond, those peculiarly skilled in Yin and Yang Nature Transformations could eventually create a unique strand of chakra not sensed by others due to the Nature Transformation ratio to sense others without their knowledge.

Kai knew the last bit was possible because he already achieved something similar.

[Two Symbols Protection]

Bypassing this seal was effortless once others realized the ratio in which Kai formed the seal and its unique key, which was currently known only to the hobgoblin. It was also because of this seal Kai realized something strange about Nono.

Team 9 found a safe spot to rest after traveling at varying speeds for the entire day. They chose to temporarily sleep in the wilds rather than locate a settlement. After all, Tsunade only intended to rest for a few hours before leaving at the break of dawn.

Taking on the task of securing the perimeter, Tsunade soon retrieved the warm, rolled-up slip of parchment left by Kai.

She calmly unfurled the parchment before frowning.

Tiredly sighing, the blonde destroyed the message before continuing her task.

As scheduled, Team 9 continued their journey after a few hours and reached the distant west as the lush trees grew sparse and the wind felt arid. Linked with the Land of Wind to the West, Land of Fire's western regions were somewhat barren but offered lucrative mines for several minerals. Alas, all these minerals were primarily for the civilian towns and villages. Instead, the few rare mines in the Eastern portion of the land produced the rare Chakra Metals.

Entering Red Strip was effortless for the team since Mayor Jin Lin employed a few Ronins who were once decorated Samurai capable of utilizing Chakra. However, their methods were more straightforward compared to the deceptive Shinobi. Even finding a sensor among these Ronins and Samurais was a rarity. Team 9's actual opponent was the team hired by Konoha's spy.

Arriving a few hours before the target's arrival, Team 9 kicked into action as the Red Strip Town soon became the epicenter of intense carnage, explosions, and lightning storms.

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Alternate Title: The Rare Mission; Promotion Task; Months of Growth; Almost Peaking Chunin Stats; Near-Jonin Might; Constantly Cooking; Getting Vengeance For Kushina, Lol; Relieved And Weightless; Kai Keeps On Pushing; Noticing Something; The Weird Nono; Kai Needs a Dump; Grabbing Dem Goods; Never Missing An Opportunity; Tsunade Got Almost All The Genetic Perks For Two Massive Debuffs; The Types of Sensors; A Team of Sensors; Tsunade's Retaliation; The Chan Era; Kai Dropped The Hammer On His Foot; Reaching Red Strip; Not Every Mission Is Above The Table; Underhanded Villages; Retrieving a Spy; Distant Travel; The Ronins and Samurais; Strange Event Ahead; The Smuggling Town; The Prolific Red Town

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