I Flirted with the General in the Zerg Empire [Interstellar]

Beautiful Zerg

On the third day of their honeymoon.

Before dawn broke, the world outside was still shrouded in a thick white mist. The female Zerg had already gotten out of bed to dress. A sliver of pale light filtered through the window, just enough to see clearly.

“Click.” He Yi reached out to switch on the bedside lamp, rubbing his drowsy eyes. “Why are you up so early?”

The misunderstanding from yesterday had not only activated his bloodline but also drained all his energy. And they had been messing around for quite a while last night. Now, it was still early, and he couldn’t stop yawning from exhaustion.

“Wait, Ah Zhao, come here and let me take a look.” He Yi stopped the female Zerg, who was putting on his shoes. Half-kneeling on the bed, he pulled him closer and widened his eyes to inspect him carefully. “Aren’t you tired? Do you feel uncomfortable anywhere?”

“Not tired,” the female Zerg shook his head.

He Yi’s expression at that moment resembled that of an innocent girl deceived by a heartless playboy. He widened his eyes in disbelief and questioned, “How can you be so energetic?” Early in the morning, his spouse was lively and refreshed, while he was utterly drained.

—Where was the dignity of the “dominant top” supposed to go?

He collapsed back onto the bed in defeat.

The female Zerg’s internal alarm bells rang instantly.

Damn, he had overplayed the act last night and forgot to cover it up this morning.

He switched gears in an instant, striking a pose with one hand on his hip and speaking in a fragile tone, “My lord, I think it hurts a little.” As he spoke, he tripped over his own feet and conveniently tumbled onto the bed. “Ow, that hurts!”

Hearing the weak voice, the previously frustrated He Yi perked up as if he’d just been revived with a jolt of oxygen. “What happened? Where does it hurt? I’ll rub it for you.”

With just the right pressure, he massaged the female Zerg’s waist, all the while scolding gently, “You’re being ridiculous. Why get up so early when you don’t even have work? And pushing yourself when you’re not feeling well…”

“Hey, are you laughing?”

Noticing the gleam of mischief in the female Zerg’s eyes, He Yi’s softened expression immediately vanished, replaced by an icy glare. “Getting bold, aren’t you?”

The female Zerg turned his face away without a word, shoulders trembling.

He Yi grew angrier—his shoulders were shaking like an engine, and did he really think turning away would hide the fact that he was stifling laughter? With quick precision, He Yi changed his grip and dug into the female Zerg’s underarms, mercilessly tickling him. “Laugh, huh? You still dare laugh? I’ll make sure you laugh all you want today!”

“Ahhh—hahaha! My lord—haha—stop, stop tickling!” The female Zerg burst out laughing, tears forming in his eyes as he begged for mercy.

With the sharp instincts and agility of a military Zerg, he could have easily dodged the tickling—but why miss out on such a golden opportunity to play around with his lord?

He Yi didn’t let up. “Admit your mistake! Will you still dare laugh at me?”

“No, no! Haha—I won’t, I won’t!” The female Zerg squirmed wildly, but rather than escaping, he deliberately maneuvered closer to He Yi’s hands, fully embracing the playful moment. His exaggerated movements and laughter were all part of the act.

Unfortunately, the simple-hearted He Yi didn’t catch on, thinking instead that his spouse’s clumsy antics were adorable.

After a bout of laughter and playful wrestling, all traces of sleepiness vanished.

“Why didn’t you sleep a bit longer?”

“We’ll have guests today.”

“Who?”

“The Male Protection Association.”

He Yi flopped back onto the bed, groaning. “Why didn’t I get the memo? Isn’t it supposed to be a once-a-month visit? The mid-month meeting is already over!”

“Did you forget? The President said he was preparing your coming-of-age gift,” the female Zerg spoke softly, keeping his gaze lowered to conceal any emotion.

At the mention of this, He Yi felt a headache coming on. A gift? It was clearly just an excuse to interfere in his marriage and meddle in his relationship! It seemed he was in for a tough fight today. “Wait, how do you know it’s today?” He himself, the recipient of this “visit,” hadn’t even been informed.

“The military’s honeymoon leave lasts three days. Since the President is bringing a gift, he’d definitely come while I’m still here,” the female Zerg responded calmly, lowering his eyes.

After all, only with his presence could they achieve their true intent: belittling him, while enjoying the sight of him fuming in frustration yet unable to retaliate.

—

Sure enough, just before lunchtime, the doorbell rang with the arrival of the Male Protection Association’s members.

Surprisingly, President Howard hadn’t come in person. Instead, Phoebe, a baby-faced male, arrived with six “gifts,” each with a distinct appearance.

Once seated, Phoebe explained, “The President is busy preparing for the royal banquet, so he couldn’t make it. The moment I heard it was your place, I volunteered for the job.”

He Yi nodded, indicating he understood.

Phoebe, as carefree as ever, chuckled. “Aren’t you pleasantly surprised, Your Excellency? How about it? My youthful, flower-like face is much more pleasing than that old man’s, isn’t it?”

He Yi: “…” Neither is pleasing, thanks.

Seeing no objection, Phoebe grinned even wider. “Come on, come on, take a look. These are all handpicked gifts the President prepared for you.”

With a clap of his hands, five military females and one sub-female emerged from behind the sofa and bowed to greet him.

Before they could even introduce themselves, Zhao rose and silently positioned himself between them and He Yi, blocking the sticky, lingering glances directed at his lord. In a low voice, he asked, “My lord, should I prepare some tea to serve our guests?”

The word “guests” was bitten off sharply.

However, the two carefree males present didn’t notice the underlying tension in his tone. Seated as he was, He Yi couldn’t see Zhao’s stiff expression with its subtle trace of anger.

He reached out, pulling Zhao back onto the sofa. “No need. Let Xiao Yi handle it.” Standing up, He Yi walked over and activated the standby robot in the corner. “Xiao Yi, prepare some tea.”

Phoebe, oblivious to Zhao’s hostility, was instead pleased by his behavior. “Well, well, Your Excellency! It seems General Zhao has grown more disciplined these days.” He gave a thumbs-up in approval.

He Yi, confused, let out an awkward laugh, unsure how to respond.

Meanwhile, Xiao Yi, the robot, had just completed its reboot sequence. And like every early-education model for male households, it did what it was programmed to do: automatically scan for any females or sub-females within a 10-meter radius.

Its sensors flashed red, and after processing the results, it began to chant dramatically:

“Ah! Fragile sub-females, tender flowers so rare,
Noble male, you must keep one at home with care!”

Driven by sheer survival instinct, the robot chanted as it swiftly fled toward the kitchen.

As the robot had rightly noted, the only sub-female among the six “gifts” stood out strikingly. With snow-white skin, rosy lips, and a delicate, water-like beauty, his seductive figure exuded charm, making him conspicuous among the five military females. Phoebe gestured toward the petite sub-female with a proud smile. “This is my cousin, Joey. Isn’t he gorgeous?”

He leaned closer with a grin. “That old-fashioned President wanted to give you only military females—can you believe that? No sense of romance! So, I took it upon myself to bring you this sub-female instead. After all, why let such a treasure go to waste on outsiders? Pretty generous of me, right?”

The sub-female named Joey took small, graceful steps forward and spoke softly, “Good day, Your Excellency. My name is Joey. I have admired you for a long time and… wish to serve you for the rest of my life.”

His words were delicate and melodious, each syllable drawn out with a charming cadence.

If any other male were here, they would have gladly accepted such a beautiful, sweet-voiced sub-female into their fold. But He Yi could only shiver deeply, feeling a wave of discomfort wash over him. “Is this some reincarnated flirtation spirit?” he thought, rubbing his arms to shake off the creeping unease.

Just as he was about to reject Joey outright, Zhao suddenly stood up and walked away. He Yi’s hand, which had been reaching out, froze in midair. He couldn’t stop him in time. “Ah Zhao, where are you going?”

“You deal with your guests, my lord. I’m going to the kitchen to make lunch,” Zhao replied, quickening his pace without looking back, as if a hungry wolf were chasing him.

Watching his partner disappear from view in the blink of an eye, He Yi stood there, momentarily dumbfounded. “Isn’t Xiao Yi already making tea?” But now wasn’t the time to chase after him for answers, not with guests sitting in the living room.

He turned back to face Joey, his expression cool and distant. “Don’t fall in love with me. It won’t end well.”

Joey’s large green eyes instantly welled with tears, shimmering with sadness.

Phoebe exaggeratedly raised his eyebrows and teased, “My goodness! How could you be so heartless toward such a delicate beauty? These lovely creatures are meant to be pampered!”

He Yi gave Joey a cold, critical glance from head to toe, then arrogantly tilted his chin. “Too pale. Hair’s too long. Eyes are too big. Nose isn’t sharp enough. Lips are too small…”

After listing his critiques, he concluded bluntly, “And you call this a ‘beauty’? Really?”

His message couldn’t have been clearer: Mediocre me is too good for mediocre you.

Joey’s tears, which had gathered in his eyes, were stunned into retreat by He Yi’s sharp words. It was as if He Yi had slapped him squarely across the face, shattering all of Joey’s pride. In front of everyone, the confidence he had once held so dearly was torn to shreds and ground into dust.

Phoebe was speechless at He Yi’s unconventional taste. “What about the military females? They each have their own style. Surely one of them catches your eye?”

He Yi’s reply was cold and firm. “None of them. I only like Ah Zhao, and there’s only one Ah Zhao in the world.”

He believed that things become cheap when spread too thin—love included.

His desire was simple: to share a lifetime with one partner, nothing more. But in this world, that kind of thinking was out of the ordinary. Among this society of Zergoids, the norms were starkly different from those on Earth. Their families upheld male dominance and female subservience. Their lives prioritized reproduction for the survival of the species. As for personal value, females were expected to join the military, while males were to take in multiple partners and lay eggs to fulfill their worth.

Yet no matter the customs, He Yi remained steadfast in his own beliefs about love. To love one person means to love them passionately, for a lifetime, through thick and thin.

While the arrogant male in the living room was busy rejecting a group of eager suitors, the jealous female in the kitchen was furiously venting his frustration through food preparation.

The sound of clattering pots and pans echoed loudly from the kitchen: Clang! Bang! Clatter!

Another ingredient was smashed to bits under the force of the kitchen knife.

His cherry-red lower lip bore deep teeth marks.

A faint metallic taste spread on Zhao’s tongue—he had bitten too hard. Frustration and confusion churned within him. He was furious with himself for showing attitude toward his lord in front of the guests. At a time when one or more new sub-females might enter their household and steal away He Yi’s tenderness and affection, he had foolishly acted out, likely leaving his lord disappointed. Winning back even a fraction of He Yi’s favor now seemed impossible.

He felt lost and helpless.

That beautiful sub-female boy, pale, soft, and smooth—he was about to be chosen as the lord’s new servant!

No, he couldn’t just sit back and do nothing!

Zhao squeezed his eyes shut, frantically sifting through his memories for any useful ideas.

Moments later, he opened his eyes and stared blankly at the red marks imprinted on his palm from gripping the knife too tightly. Minor injury, bright red… If his lord still cared about him, this might be his chance…

He took a deep breath, forcing his eyes to redden with unshed tears, and strode quickly out of the kitchen.

Hah, little sub-female love rival? Not on my watch!