Help?! My Harem is Trying to Kill Me!

 

I took a long hard look at myself in the mirror, my empty bag ridden brown eyes. My acne spotted face, and my disheveled hair. 

As I touched the oily skin on my face, a question popped into my head. 

Can this person beat the game?

The last girlfriend I had was in middle school, and that lasted a week! 

I deeply sighed, before turning on the faucet and splashing water on my face. 

If failure is an option, how exactly do I fail? By making the heroines hate me? That already seems to be the case. So what are the other options? 

*Smack*

I smacked both sides of my face, shaking my head to clear the bad thoughts. 

I can’t think about failure! I have to think about victory! The only reason I was given this insane difficulty was because I was so good at the game! 

“You can do this!” I screamed as I fist pumped! “Yeah!!!” 

Little did Jeff know, Mizuki and Kenzie could hear his amped up screaming. Mizuki clung to her mother as Kenzie desperately tried to get ahold of his father. And as per usual, he did not answer. 

After I got cleaned up, I headed to my room to get dressed for school.

Luckily I didn’t have to search very hard for it since it was already hanging up on his closet door. “I can’t believe I missed this…” 

There was a pair of black khaki pants hanging up along with a black blazer to match. 

I ran my fingers along it’s silky exterior, noting every minor detail. 

“It looks even better in person.” I murmured. 

I put on the uniform that seemed as though it was made just for me. 

This uniform is kind of lit! 

A small bud of excitement began to blossom inside of my chest. Maybe it was the gamer inside of me, or the expectation of experiencing something new. 

I took one last look in the mirror, straightened out my clothes, and gave myself a big smile. 

My smile is as weird as ever. I need to work on it.

This was going to be me and Mizuki’s first day back to school after vacation. This was the start of the game, and the protagonist had to face his first day at school being the only man. 

I shivered from the knowledge of what was awaiting me. 

Mizuki and I said our goodbyes to Kenzie and left for school. In the game, the protagonist and his sister took the train to school. His being in one direction, her’s being in the other direction, and it seemed to still be the case. 

In order to become a harem ki…and also to save everyone. I have to get closer to the heroines of the game. 

“The list should be..” I muttered underneath my breath. 

Mizuki, Kenzie, Saya, Riri, Sarah, Jennifer, and Gabriella.  

 I rummaged through the memories of my various playthroughs. Even though the game had unprecedented obstacles, it was still ‘Help My Harem is Trying to Kill Me!’ “If their personalities are even a tad bit similar..” 

 “Please stop talking to yourself.” Mizuki’s annoyed voice broke me from trance. 

I looked to see her playing with her phone with a deep frown. 

“That is what you were doing, right?” Mizuki asked. 

“Yeah, you caught me.” I jokingly said. 

Mizuk rolled her eyes before speeding up her pace a little. 

I have to  stop talking to myself out loud. I might as well be wearing a straight jacket to everyone. 

For now, I had to focus on getting through this day and getting closer to Miuki if that’s even possible. 

I had a bunch of questions that I wanted to ask her, but decided against it due to the fact that it may come off as strange. After all, I have no real memories of her. I’ll have to gradually build a connection.  

I sighed loudly, feeling the headache that would be soon to come. There was a reason why I played H games. 

I wonder why I don’t have any memories of Mizuki or Kenzie? Or even this world? Is it a result of the difficulty? Or is it because the game just started? Would that mean that there is no story before this? But, if that’s the case… 

I glanced over to Mizuki still playing with her phone. 

Does Mizuki have memories of me? 

Mizuki frowned before looking back at me. “What?” 

I made a mental note, before pushing it to the back of mind for later. 

“So how do you feel about your first day back at school?” That was the best topic I could come up with at the moment. 

Mizuki shrugged her shoulders as she continued to mess with her phone. “I get to see all of my friends again, so it’s fine.” 

“Oh, why don’t you have them over some time?” I asked. 

“Mizuki frowned before giving me a questioning glare. “Why?” 

Hey! What’s up with that look?! 

“Because they’re your friends?” I responded warily.

Mizuki rolled her eyes at my question before speeding up again. 

BRAT 

I sighed exasperatedly before rushing to catch up with Mizuki. 

If I get frustrated now, I might as well give up. This may be the easiest part, the game just started after all. 

We arrived at the subway, Mizuki’s train going one way, mine going the other.

“Woooah..” I said unconsciously, there were so many people that it genuinely shocked me. 

Even though it was early morning, the city was wide awake. People shuffled everywhere on their phones, it was far different from the small city I grew up in. 

The game took place in a fictional port city called Maria. We stayed just on the outskirts of the city, which was a stark contrast from the inner city. 

Maria was filled with people from all over the world, but it was a smaller port city so it wasn’t too big. 

“Tch, why are you making strange sounds? We've been here plenty of times.” Mizuki said angrily. 

I coughed, clearing my throat. Calming the burning sensation on my face. 

I almost forgot that I was playing the part of the protagonist, or rather I am the protagonist now. 

“Well, I-” Mizuki started walking away before I had the chance to finish speaking. “Goodbye!”

Mizuki threw her hand up before entering the train. 

How much of a brat can you be?! Is this what I have to look forward to?! 

“So which train do I take?” I looked up at the signs for my train. “Oh! There it is!”  

Luckily, I didn't have to wait around for much longer. My train pulled up not too long after Mizuki’s had left. 

My train finally came to a stop, and I began my climb to Marshall’s Academy. 

As I walked up the hill leading to the school, I was quickly surrounded by my soon to be classmates. 

“What is he…” 

“They just made the school coed..” 

“Yeah, I just can’t believe that one actually showed up..” 

“He looks kind of weird…”

Sweat trickled down my face as the onlookers gazes and whispers bore down on me. 

This is so stressful! How did the Protagonist deal with any of this?!

The veins on my forehead felt like they were about to burst. I could feel a massive headache forming and a wave of nausea like none other. 

I need to get away!

As I approached the top of the hill, I was made incredibly aware of how out of shape I was. 

Who the hell puts a school at the top of a hill?! 

I inwardly cursed my luck as I struggled to make it up the hill. 

Finally, after what seemed like hours of torture, I could finally make out the school.

My eyes felt like they were going to pop out of my head as I laid eyes on the grandiose ‘Marshall’s Academy.’ 

It was a huge brick structure, designed like an old Victorian era building. It had a golden grandiose bell at the top of the building, ringing incessantly. It looked and sounded just like the game. 

As I reached the gate, the stares of the female students grew stronger. And the sea of frowns began to form. 

Please, stop staring at me?! Or at least don’t look at me like I'm a giant pile of crap!   

The crowd began to part as I was about to pass the entrance. But before I could…

“Hey!” A loud and demanding voice caught my attention as I stopped in my tracks to see where it came from. 

“Are you a student here?!” I turned to see a red haired woman wearing a blue suit jacket with a blue skirt and black stockings and heels. 

Her hair was long and cherry red, complimenting her smooth ivory white skin. Her light green eyes popped, sharp and predatory but still beautifully dazzling. She had the perfect hourglass figure, and her chest was huge as well. Despite the frown settling on her face, it did not dampen her beauty in any way. 

“Hello?!” The red haired woman screamed as she took a step closer to me, her chest bouncing lightly. “Are you deaf?!” 

“Tch!” My annoyance soared through the roof  after hearing this rude woman, but my expression of anger quickly turned to shock. “Jennifer?!” 

Jennifer frowned before her face morphed into anger. “Huh?! How do you know my name?!” 

“Oh!” Fuck! I was too excited! “Uhh..I..uh..” 

I was desperately thinking of excuses one after the other, while Jeniffer’s face only grew darker by the second. 

“Ah!” It came to me! Duh!!

“Ah?” Jeniffer repeated after me with a confused scowl.

“Sorry.” I quickly responded. “I found out about you from my mom. She’s a little overprotective so she demanded all of the teachers names. I remember yours because she mentioned a beautiful woman with red hair.” 

Jennifer was silent as she observed me. 

Did it work? What should I do if it didn't?

Jennifer snorted loudly before holding out her hand. 

There was an awkward silence as Jennifer stared at me. “Student ID!” 

“Oh!” I exclaimed. 

I reached inside of my pocket and pulled out an ID with my face on it before handing it to her.

Jennifer scrutinized my ID for a minute before handing it back to me with a humph. “Stay out of trouble!” 

“Why are you yelling at me?” I muttered under my breath. 

“I’m not yelling at you!” Jeniifer screamed. “This is how I speak!”

I sighed before walking away. There was still some time left before the assembly. I should go somewhere secluded. 

As I walked around the school, I was beginning to lose hope of ever finding a secluded spot. 

I circled around the back of the furthest building away from the school, and as I rounded the corner of the building, I breathed a huge sigh of relief. “Finally…” 

“Finally what?” My heart skipped a beat when I heard a somewhat cheerful and mature feminine voice. 

I looked up to see who the owner of the voice was.

The owner of the voice belonged to a girl with long black silky hair. Her eyes were big, brown and deep. Sucking me in against my will. Her face was delicate and well defined. Her lips were pink and full. Her skin glistened a soft ivory white. While the rest of her body was well proportioned yet slender like a model.

The girl was squatting down against the wall, smoking a cigarette. She had on a white long sleeved dress shirt, with a brown sweater wrapped around her waist, and a black skirt and dress shoes. 

She looked somewhat surprised to see another person here, and stared at me with eyes that drew me in. 

“Sa-“ I quickly covered my mouth, learning my lesson from earlier. 

“Sa-“ She repeated after me. 

Her name was Saya. She was one of the heroines of ‘Help?! My Harem is Trying to Kill Me!’ 

She was one of the worst heroines! She engaged in compensated dating, and was extremely manipulative.     

Shivers ran up my spine from thinking about all of the bad routes she had! 

Shit! Why is she here?! I’m not supposed to meet her until later on in the game?! Is it because I deviated from the main story by coming here?!

“Hey, Pervert!” Saya’s loud voice snapped me back to reality. 

Pervert?! How the hell did I get that nickname?! 

Ugh!!! I should have followed the story, I’m such an idiot! 

Saya tilted her head to the side with an amused smile, a mischievous glint burning in her eyes. 

I’m not ready for a boss battle yet! Retreat! 

I turned around and began to run away. 

If you refuse to fight the boss, then you can’t be defeated! 

“H-Hey!” Saya screamed. “Where are you going?” 

I didn’t care what she had to say, and continued running away. 

“What the fuck!” Saya's angry voice got even louder. 

I heard loud footsteps behind me, and sped up. 

Is she chasing me?! 

I turned around to see Saya right behind me.

How the fu-

Sayuri grabbed me by the sleeve. “What’s your problem?!” 

Are you kidding me?! “This is why you got picked last?!” 

“What?!” Saya yelled. 

I tried to snatch my arm away, but Saya refused to let go.

The battle quickly ended as Saya and I toppled to the ground. 

After the spill, I opened my eyes to find Saya laying on top of me with a triumphant smile on her face.  

She was face to face with me. Her lips lightly touched mine, and her breath tickled my face. Her eyes were big and round, giving off a cute and innocent look. Her breasts were pressed against my chest, and her crotch was resting against mine. 

Saya’s eyes shot wide open, and she started laughing at the top of her lungs. 

A wave of panic began to wash over me. “W-what’s so funny?!” 

“This!” Saya screamed.

Saya pressed her chest further into mine, as she lifted her legs. Exposing an unbeknownst erection that I currently had. 

Before I could even react, Saya grabbed my dick. 

Dfmkxwkzmwejpnhxxnmz1mihreycvyvegwbvdebicbhuebcubeufbcbencouebnou!!!!!

“Squeeze! Squeeze!” Saya playfully said as she continued to play with my erection. 

“Aweee look at your face!” Saya yelled as she pointed at my face. “Are you.. A virgin?!” 

 “Get the hell off of me!” I pushed Saya off of me. 

Who the hell does she think she is?! I mean.. yeah she touched my dick, but still! 

“Hey! You don’t have to be so rude! It was just a joke, it’s not my fault you’re a virgin!” Saya angrily said.

“Fuck you!” I’m 16, it’s normal for me to be a virgin! 

“You wish you could, huh?” Saya asked with a seductive undertone. 

“What?!” Is she seriously trying to flirt with me right now?! I’m done with this! 

I stood back up, dusting myself off. 

“Wait! Wait! Wait!” Saya said as she got back to her feet. “I’m sorry.. Okay?”  

Saya batted her eyes at me, using the same annoying seductive voice as before. 

“Hey! Don’t look like that!” Saya said as she grabbed my hand. “Hang out with me for a little bit!”  

“No!” Unhand me, thot!

I tried to sntach my hand away, but Saya refused to let go. 

“Just a little?” Saya asked as a beautiful smile spread across her lips. 

I sighed, resigning myself to this fate. Not because she had a beautiful smile, but because she wouldn’t give up. That’s just how her character works. 

“Fine..” I muttered.. 

“What was that?!” Saya asked joyfully, a slight hint of smugness in her tone. 

“I said okay! Jesus!” I screamed. 

“Yeah! Jesus can hang out with us too!” Saya yelled as she grabbed my arm and yanked me back behind the building. 

How did I get here? 

I leaned against the wall, listening to Saya ramble on.

“So how does it feel being the one of the only guy’s here?!” Saya asked as she puffed her cigarette. 

God, that smells! “I am the only guy, and it’s weird.” 

“Huh?!” Saya coughed. “You’re the only one?!”

“Yup.” I answered dryly. 

“Hmm.. I thought for sure there’d be more guys applying here. I mean, if I was a guy I would!” Saya laughed. “Hey, why did you apply here?” 

“It was the closest school.” If I answer dryly, she’s for sure going to lose interest. 

A cloud of smoke hit my face, causing me to cough uncontrollably. “Hey! Don’t blow that shit over here!” 

“Then stop lying!” Saya said, blowing another cloud of smoke in my face. “And stop being boring!” 

“Fine!” I screamed while batting the smoke out of my face. “And I’m not boring, I just don’t want to talk to you!”

Saya took a deep puff of her cigarette, quietly watching me as she exhaled. “That’s exactly what a boring person would say.” 

“Whatever. I'm boring. So you shouldn’t talk to me anymore.” I answered matter of factly. 

Saya held her stomach as she started laughing uncontrollably. “Now there’s some honesty!” 

School is about to start any time now! How much longer am I going to have to play the monkey on the string act for her? 

 “Congratulations!” Saya screamed. “You win!” 

“Win?” God, I have such a bad feeling right now.. 

“Yeah!” Saya smiled. “Close your eyes.” 

My brain short circuited for a moment, going through various scenarios. 

“Come on.” Saya said playfully. 

“I… I don’t want to.” I can’t trust her, I have no clue what she's going to do. 

“Stop being so boring.” Saya inhaled her cigarette, preparing to blow the smoke in my face again. 

“Okay! Okay!” I pleaded. Anything was better than that. 

“Good boy!” Saya said as she patted my head. 

“Please don’t touch me.” I responded as I moved out of her range. 

“Ow!” Saya yelled as she clutched her chest. “After everything we’ve been through?!” 

“I don’t even kn-“ My words were cut off instantly. 

“Stop being such a pussy.” Saya said. Her voice no longer held any warmth. “Or I’m going to change your prize to something else.” 

The alarm bells were blaring inside my head, so I decided to just go with the flow. I closed my eyes silently. 

“Don’t open them!” Saya exclaimed. 

My palms and armpits were starting to sweat, and my heart was beating uncontrollably.

If she steals my wallet, that would be the best outcome. 

A soft feeling wrapped around my face, and a sweet citrus smell filled my nostrils. 

“Huh?” I opened my eyes to see Saya playfully skipping away with a gleeful laugh. 

“What the..” I ripped what appeared to be a piece of cloth off of my face almost immediately. “What the hell?!” 

In my hand, there was a pair of racy black panties! “Why would you give me these?!” 

I balled them up, and pulled my arm back to throw them away. 

“Hey.” With an icy tone, Saya turned around with a blank stare. “When I give you something, you take it.” 

“O-okay…” I answered instinctively. 

“Good boy!” Saya smiled coldly before turning around and leaving. “See you later, Pervert!” 

After Saya left, I examined the pair of lingerie that I held in my hand. “Fuck am I supposed to do with these?”

I was going to throw them away, but I quickly remembered the empty expression on Saya’s face. 

Nah.. that bitch is crazy.

I slipped the lingerie into my sock. There shouldn’t be any way possible to cause a problem that way. 

I sighed loudly, cursing my luck. 

Why do I have to be involved with such a troublesome person? Hopefully this is the worst today has to offer. “Wait.. did I just jinx myself? Shit.”

I quickly left from behind the building to go to the scheduled entrance ceremony.

I winded through the crowd of onlookers until I arrived at the auditorium.

There was an entrance ceremony on the first day of school. Everyone had to take a seat and listen to the principal and teachers introduce themselves and explain the school rules, etc. 

I didn’t want to be noticed, so I waited to get in line towards the end so that I could sit in the back. 

Finally, everyone was here and the auditorium doors were closed. 

Even though it was somewhat dark in the auditorium, I could hear the murmurs around me. 

“Is that him?” 

“Yeah.. I thought it would be someone beautiful like jang…” 

“Ew… why couldn’t he be handsome?” 

I can hear you! 

I gave a silent prayer for the harsh treatment to stop soon. Since there was nothing that I could do about it now, I did my best to pay attention to the boring jargon and rudimentary stuff. 

Until… 

A tall slender woman with long black hair and piercing blue eyes stared in my direction. 

Ms.Marshall. She was the principal of Marshall Academy and the great granddaughter of the founder of the academy. 

Huh? Is she looking at me? 

I looked around to see who else she could be looking at, but everyone else around me had a blank expression. 

“I would like to welcome one of our first male students!” Ms.Marshall joyfully yelled. 

Oh no… 

I slouched into my seat, like a turtle hides in its shell. 

All of the women looked around, murmurs turning into yelling. 

“There’s a guy here?!” 

“Where?!” 

“Are they serious?!” 

“Why does he get a grand welcome?!” 

“I want to transfer schools…” 

The women near my vicinity quickly noticed me in the dimly lit auditorium, alerting everyone in the process. 

“He’s here! He’s here!” 

“Really?!” 

Please make it stop?! Please make it stop?! 

I squirmed in my seat, bullets of sweating running down my face and staining my clothes. 

“Come on up!” Ms.Marshall screamed. 

I didn’t move, choosing to instead remain seated. 

Ms.Marshall signaled for someone behind the curtain, and suddenly a bright light shined down on me. 

“What?!” The words left my mouth immediately with any hesitation. 

Everyone’s eyes were glued on me, silently waiting for my response. 

“I..I..uh…” Shit! Shit! Shit! 

“Awe don’t be shy!” Ms.Marshall said. “Come on, let’s give him some encouragement. 

Ms. Marshall started clapping cheerfully while singing ‘come up.’ 

Causing the students around me to join in. 

This wasn’t in the story! 

Before I could argue, I was already being shoved on stage.

This was not in the story! 

I finally got on stage next to Ms.Marshal, the lights blaring in my eyes. And the students' eyes drilled into my soul. 

“So how are you feeling today?!” Ms.Marshall said as she loved the podium's mic towards my mouth. 

“I-I’m.. um..good?” My mouth was dry and I was having a hard time catching my breath. 

“So how excited are you about your new school?!” Mr.Marshall asked with a forced smile. 

“I’m so excited..” I answered flatly. 

Ms.Marshall stared at me for a few seconds before she quickly resumed her interrogation. “Well.. do you have a few words for your fellow students?!”  

“I..Um.. hope we all have a good school year together. Thank you.” I bowed for some odd reason. 

A fake round applause sounded around me as I was quickly escorted off of the stage. 

The rest of the ceremony flew by in an instant, and I arrived at my homeroom. 

Fuckkkkk!!! 

I yelled inside of my head, learning my lesson from earlier. 

There was a petite girl with earbuds scribbling in her notebook near a window. She had long curly black hair, silky brown skin and glittery light brown eyes. Her lips were brown and plump, encouraging the desire to bite them. 

God?! Why?! Why do I keep encountering final bosses?!!! I’m level 1!!!! 

The petite girl near the window was Riri. 

An annoying annoying ass tsundere! If I ignored her for even a little bit of time she would fly into a yandere mode! 

“Ummm.. excuse me?” There was a faint voice beside me. I turned my head to see a petite girl with blue hair and bangs covering her eyes. 

“Oh sorry.” I realized that I was standing in the doorway and quickly stepped inside of the class. 

It was homeroom so I had 30 minutes of free time to relax before I had to start my classes. 

Since the teacher wasn’t in yet, I took a seat towards the back to avoid all of the stares aimed at me. 

I gazed at Riri, and she hadn’t once looked up. Suddenly, she glanced to the side and our eyes met. 

Shit! 

I quickly averted my eyes. 

Hopefully she didn't notice me. 

“Good morning!” The homeroom teacher joyfully said. This was also one of my future harem members, Sarah. 

She was a petite brunette with freckles and a cute button nose. Her hair was tied in a ponytail, revealing her soft delicate nape. She had beautiful olive tanned skin that was complemented by her bright blue eyes. And her lips were full and soft cherry red. Despite her age, she maintained a youthful appearance. If you didn’t know any better you would think that she was a high schooler herself. 

Sarah was actually a very decent heroine in her own right. She was cheerful and very loving. As long as I gave her a decent amount of affection it would be near impossible for her to walk down the Yandere path.

I’m actually looking forward to her. 

“We have a special student with us today..” Sarah said. “Jeff, please step up to the board?” 

“O-okay..” I said as I made my way up to the board, being scrutinized by all of the students around me. 

“Please, introduce yourself.” Sarah happily requested. 

Man, she’s really cute… 

I took a deep breath as I observed my class. 

Here I go! “Ummm… I’m uh…” I’m fucking up! I’m fucking it all up!! “My name is Jeff. I hope we all get along!” 

Short and sweet! 

“Ah!” Sarah suddenly yelled. “I almost forgot, we have another student today.” 

Suddenly, the classroom erupted into panic. Girlish screaming filling the entire room. 

 Huh? Why are they all going crazy? 

I followed the girl's line of sight, and my jaw nearly fell to the floor at what I saw. 

“This is our very special student as well!” Sarah yelled. 

“Haha! Thanks, but I’m not that important.” A tall man sauntered through the doorway. He had white chestnut hair cut into a Jack Dempsey haircut. His green eyes sparkled, complimented by his pale skin. He possessed delicate features that were accentuated by his two beauty marks. One below his left eye, and the other underneath his bottom lip on the right. 

“Sorry I’m late.”As he stood next to me, he smiled, lighting up the room and causing a course of screams from the girls.

 “Nice to meet you.” He held his hand out for me to shake it. 

I returned his handshake with trembling hands, forcing myself to smile.  "L-likewise..."

No… No… No… No…No!!! 

“This is Jason!”