Harry Potter: Dragonborn comes

"Seven for Chaos"

Sheogorath, the Daedric Prince of Madness

The children crossed the portal in a tight bunch, trembling slightly with fear. This wasn't like facing off against bandits or bullies; the person before them could effortlessly defeat their own father and mentor.

According to the stories, if this really was Sheogorath, then they were facing the most dangerous and powerful being among his kind. That's why an ancient curse had caused him to change personalities over time. But apparently, those personalities had finally separated, choosing as champion the one who defeated...

"Why do you keep talking like an idiot? Let the kids enjoy my presence for themselves!" interrupted the man known as Sheogorath, lounging with insulting comfort on a sofa made of the hides of creatures that didn't exist in any normal zoo.

"Who's he talking to?" Blaise asked his siblings, who just shrugged, equally confused.

"Why did you bring us here?" asked Runa boldly, stepping in front to protect her siblings with the fiercest look she could muster.

"I didn't bring you here… well, yes, but no... hmm, who did?" Sheogorath replied with genuine confusion, like a child who had lost his keys.

"Let me rephrase: why are we here?" Runa insisted.

"No idea," Sheogorath answered with a carefree smile, stretching out on the couch as he pulled out a block of cheese, cutting it into small pieces and popping them into his mouth like he was on a picnic.

The children didn't know whether to run or stay frozen. Before them stood one of the most feared demons in all of Nirn, yet he seemed less interested in being good or evil than in… well, eating cheese and...

"I told you already, stop doing that," Sheogorath said, frowning with an expression that was both serious and completely absurd.

The children whispered among themselves, casting nervous glances at the Daedric Prince, who pretended to ignore them but was clearly hearing every word.

Suddenly, they all froze as Lucía, without a hint of fear, walked up to Sheogorath.

"Hey, you like cheese, right? I have ten slices. If you take us to Dad, I'll give you three," she said proudly, like she had just made the best deal in the world.

Her siblings paled and began to draw weapons, ready to protect her if necessary.

Sheogorath stared at her for a moment, then burst into a mocking laugh.

"Mortal, do you think a few simple slices of cheese will help you in your absurd quest for that arrogant brat? At least it should be all ten."

"But I found the cheese. Hmm... I'll give you five," Lucía replied, standing firm in her negotiation.

The prince frowned, and suddenly the ground began to tremble with every word he spoke.

"I could kill you right now and toss your body to some corner of the Shivering Isles and keep everything you brought," Sheogorath threatened with a mix of anger and amusement.

The air around him distorted, revealing cracks that showed thoughts, minds, and scenes of humans, elves, orcs, and creatures they couldn't even begin to comprehend.

"So... is that a no?" Lucía asked, tilting her head innocently.

"Six," Sheogorath said with a serious, almost resigned look.

"Deal," Lucía smiled proudly, turning back to her siblings, who were completely in shock at what they had just witnessed.

A glowing blue portal opened behind them just as Lucía handed over the six slices happily.

"Get out of here before I drive you insane for barging into my realm," Sheogorath growled. "Oh, and tell the brat I'm already preparing the next game."

He reclined once more on the sofa, placing the cheese on a table seemingly made for that exact purpose.

As the children ran through the portal, Sheogorath smiled victoriously and pulled out one more slice. Now he had seven delicious cheeses.

…

The children were flung out the other side of the portal like they'd been spit out by a temperamental volcano. They tumbled over each other, rolling across the soft grass-covered ground, trying to process whether what they'd just experienced had been real… or a particularly absurd dream.

For a brief moment, everything was silent.

Then came the scream.

"Aaaah!" shrieked Lucía, her face puffed like she'd bitten into a lemon, wounded pride written all over her.

Everyone immediately went on guard, hands to weapons, eyes wide.

"What happened?" asked Sofie, glancing at the little girl who was furiously rummaging through her backpack as if someone had stolen sacred treasure.

"He stole from me! He said six and took seven!" Lucía growled, pointing an accusing finger at the air, as if Sheogorath himself might hear her. "We're going back right now!"

She turned, determined to jump back into the portal, but—

"NO!" everyone shouted in unison, diving on top of her in a desperate avalanche.

They caught her just before she could take a step. And as if the universe had been waiting for that moment, the portal fizzled with a mocking laugh… and closed.

"NOOOOO!" Lucía wailed, tears welling up. "It was mine! My six cheeses! That's not fair, he said six!"

"It's okay, it's okay, calm down…" Lars said, smiling with big-brother confidence. "We'll get you more. I don't think there's a world without cheese."

"Yeah, we'll find food. And if we're lucky, cheese. Maybe... magical cheese!" added Blaise, trying to cheer her up while the others nodded with encouraging words.

"Well…" Lucía mumbled, still pouting, but allowing herself to be hugged. "But you all owe me seven."

Then, everyone began to take a closer look at their new surroundings. The air was so pure that each breath seemed to fill them with energy. They stood in a forest straight out of a fairy tale, with tall trees of silver bark and leaves that changed colors like liquid fire. Flowers sang to the wind, brooks laughed as they flowed, and an ethereal fragrance surrounded them.

"Where are we…?" Alesan whispered, mouth agape.

The answer seemed to lie in the distance, atop a hill: a castle. Not an ordinary one, but a majestic golden fortress that looked carved from solid light. Around it stood more strange constructions, each one radiating a divine aura that made their skin prickle.

Even the ground beneath their feet seemed to purify them with every step.

Then, a soft and radiant female voice cut through the silence:

"My, my... seems I have unexpected visitors. How odd. No one has passed through here... not since Meridia lost her mirror."

The children spun around. There, among the trees, floating slightly above the ground, was a woman of inhuman beauty. Her skin gleamed like liquid gold, her hair flowed like flames underwater, and her body was barely draped in a fine, translucent fabric that seemed to exist more for protocol than practicality.

Instant chaos.

"Don't look!" cried Sofie, covering Alesan and Avento's eyes.

"That's not for kids!" shouted Sissel, shielding Tars and Hroar's vision.

Runa, more practical—and more brutal—jabbed two fingers into Blaise and Samuel's eyes, making them double over with pained groans.

"Why are you naked?" asked Lucía with total innocence, tilting her head.

The woman smiled, utterly charmed.

"Well, this is my dwelling. I could ask you why you're wearing clothes."

Lucía's eyes widened with a confused realization, as if she'd just uncovered a cosmic mystery.

But before she could continue, the woman paused and frowned, turning her head slightly eastward, where one of the golden sanctuaries stood.

"Ah... I see. So it was his idea." She said in a sweet voice that didn't hide her exasperation. Looking back at the children, she added with a smile, "Go down that path. Someone is waiting for you."

"Come on, come on!" said Sofie, pulling the kids along before Blaise and Samuel recovered enough to take another peek.

"What a shame…" murmured the woman as she vanished among the trees. "But I don't want my garden ending up like Talos's Throne..."

High above, at the top of the golden castle, a massive winged dragon, gleaming like the midday sun, let out a roar—or rather, an exasperated sigh.

"Sheogorath… curse you. Why didn't you just send them straight to Einar? Now I have to clean up the mess from your absurd game."

And as it slowly descended to prepare, another figure deep within the garden let out a victorious laugh.

Seated on his throne of chaos and cheese, Sheogorath lifted the final slice he had hidden under his hat.

"Seven. Heh. The odd number always wins." Then he turned his head. "See you," he said cheerfully with a wave.