Gacha Gacha Hero

“You call that a chute? That was nothing more than a fancy sewer!” Ash shouted.

Ash crawled out of a drainage ditch. Luke helped him stand up. The two of them took a moment to wipe grease and oil out of their hair.

“I don’t think people were obeying that sign. I think they threw food and drinks down that hole.” Luke pulled a canape out of his pocket.

“I should have eaten from that buffet while I had the chance. Maybe then I wouldn’t be swimming in so many leftovers.” Ash said.

After being dropped into the chute Ash and Luke had slid down a twisting tube filled with water and slime for several minutes. They had washed out in a drainage ditch at the base of the central hill in Kaseihgaeu. The ditch bubbled with rainwater, chicken bones, and grass clippings.

After cleaning themselves off as best they could they walked over to a stone bench next to the ditch and sat down. Luke looked up at the sky. Ash looked down at his feet. Tourists and citizens wandered by on the street.

“You got kind of upset in there.” said Luke.

“Can you blame me? Today I learned that there is an entire industry based on betting on who can pull the best and worst items with their summons. If I had known about this sooner I could have come here and used my miserable luck to make a fortune.” Ash picked an orange peel off of his shoulder.

“Are you sure?” asked Luke.

“What do you mean?”

“It’s only that, I really can’t see you down there in the arena. Waving and clapping. Making a big show for the audience day after day.”

Ash looked up at the sky.

Even in the daylight the arc lamps of the massive gambling hall on top of the hill could be seen shooting into the sky. In the far distance the sound of ringing bells and spinning slots could be heard over the street traffic.

“Crap. You’re right. I would hate that more than life itself. Going into that arena more than once would be a nightmare. I suppose it’s a good thing that we’re only passing through.”

Luke smiled. “I thought so. It’s a good thing we got out when we did. That place is the worst.”

“Oh yes. The absolute worst.” Ash nodded.

“Although, the architecture was very impressive.” said Luke.

“I imagine it costs a lot to maintain such a massive building.” said Ash.

“I did like the lights.”

“The music was better than average.”

“And the way the bells rang out like a heavenly choir when someone won big.”

Ash let out a long *Whistle*.

He slapped his knee. “It was amazing. I admit it. You convinced me.”

“I know. I lived in a literal castle, and I’m still impressed.” said Luke.

“But it was still the worst.” Ash crossed his arms.

“Oh yes. A wonder of the world, but still one of the worst places I’ve ever been.” Luke nodded.

“I couldn’t agree more.” said Vance.

Ash and Luke looked back at the drainage ditch.

Vance slid out of the exit of the chute. He was reclining on top of a canvas folding boat.

“Where the moons did you get a boat?” asked Ash.

“You think this is the first time I’ve been thrown out of the Ocean’s Bounty?” replied Vance. He stood up and climbed out of the drainage ditch. He dusted off his pants. “I was thrown down the nice chute. I don’t mind it actually. Saves me the trouble of having to walk all the way back down the hill at the end of the day.”

“What’s your game?” asked Ash.

“Pardon me?” said Vance.

“You are openly disdainful of the Ocean’s Bounty. You don’t seem to like any of the people there. So why visit the place at all?”

“Like it or not the Ocean’s Bounty is the center of culture in our fair city. Therefore it would be a crime against society if I denied them my enlightened presence.”

“Come on. You came out the same sewer chute we did.” said Ash.

Vance slicked back his hair. “Fine. You want the truth? The Ocean’s bounty is the largest Gambling Hall in the Four Kingdoms. Everything about it is a game. Every brick, every tile, every person, every shrimp (He waggled a shrimp tail) is tied up in one massive game that’s being run over this entire city. No! This entire Kingdom. Well I’m done being a part of their game. I’m playing for k-”

*Ker-blooop*

A bulbous oily trash bubble burst in the drainage ditch filling the air with the smell of methane and human misery.

“-huuurrrgh!” Vance retched into the ditch.

“Oh no! The smell! Ah, it’s everywhere.” Ash tried to desperately cover his nose.

“Pinch your nose. Breath through your teeth.” Luke pulled his shirt up over his face.

“Ah. Ahhh! It’s burning my eyes.” Ash cried out.

Vance wiped his mouth. He stumbled a few steps into the street and started picking his way up the street between avoiding tourists.

“You two remember what I said. Don’t *Burp* play games, at the, Ocean’s Bounty. No game. No Life. Hhuuu…” grumbled Vance.

Luke and Ash fled away from the drainage ditch in the opposite direction.