Fork This Life!

Chapter 9: Ferdinand: Farmer. Adventurer. Holder of Fork.

(POV Ferdinand)

There isn’t much to talk about when it comes to my life. I grew up in a small village, the son of farmers. My friends were cows and sheep, and the fields my playground. An extraordinarily simple life, some would say. And yet it was satisfying, knowing that you would always have food on the table, things to do, and people who cared for you.

I can say with confidence that those years were the happiest of my life. I felt safe, content with my life. There were monster attacks occasionally, but there was a retired adventurer who lived in the village that protected us.

For twenty years, I lived in bliss.

But it ended all of a sudden when the famine struck. Our herd grew sick and more dropped by the day. The crops withered and blew away. In the course of a single month, our entire livelihood had disappeared.

And we weren’t the only ones affected. The village grew quiet as people left, or died of hunger and disease.

I helped bury the coffins of men I had grown up with, known my entire life.

The only reason we survived that long was a dwindling supply of grain we had stored.

I remember when a travelling merchant came to our village. Everyone flocked to him, holding their entire lives’ savings… But he had already sold all his food in the previous village. He was chased out of the village by a mob of people who weren’t much more than skin and bones.

Shortly after that, my parents gave me a sword. They must have bought it from the merchant, because it was brand new. Then they sent me away with the rest of the food and money.

So how in the world did I end up a wandering adventurer, accompanied by a talking fork?

Why me?

I’m not anything special, even after a few years of this I’m only at level eighteen! Look at my status, just look at it!

Status

Name: Ferdinand

Race: Human

Level: 18

Experience 317.10/2600

Gender: Male

Age: 23 years

Allegiance: None

Fame: None

Strength: 30.1

Intelligence: 8.1

Dexterity: 30.7

Wisdom: 8.0

Charisma: 8.0

Luck: 37.8

Endurance: 20.4

Health: 204/204

Health regen: 2.04/min

Stamina: 307/307

Stamina regen: 3.07/min

Mana: 81/81

Mana regen: 0.8/min

Unspent stat points: 0

Titles*

Living – You are a living being, and as such, the energies of life heal you and the energies of death damage you.

-Trait: Average life energy absorption -Trait: Average death energy weakness

-Trait: minute life affinity -Trait: negative minute death affinity

Human – Most of your ancestors were human, so you are too. The only noticeable advantages humans have over other species are their prolificity and creativity. Other than that, they have sub-par biological features – apart from their thumbs.

-Trait: Average prolificity -Trait: Average creativity -Trait: Minor light-based vision -Trait: Minor vibration-based hearing -Trait: Minute chemical-based sense of smell -Trait: Minor sense of pain/touch -Trait: Minute chemical-based sense of taste -Trait: Being of flesh and blood (Minor)

Insect bane – Killer of many creepy crawlies, you can instinctively sense nearby insects, especially those harmful to you. All stats increased by 1 when attacking insects.

Traits*

Life energy absorption (Average) – life energy heals you, causing you to regain health.

Death energy weakness (Average) – death energy damages you, reducing your health.

Life affinity (Minute) – You find it easier to gain life related skills and proficiencies than if you did not have this trait.

Negative death affinity (Minute) – You find it harder to gain death related skills and proficiencies than if you did not have this trait.

Prolificity (Average) – You are very good at making babies.

Creativity (Average) – You have a higher chance to imagine, invent, and create things.

Light-based vision (Minor) – Your vision is based on light. Your civilisation is not advanced enough to view more detailed information.

Vibration-based hearing (Minor) – Your hearing is based on vibrations. Your civilisation is not advanced enough to view more detailed information.

Chemical-based sense of smell (Minute) – Your sense of smell is based on chemical reactions. Your civilisation is not advanced enough to view more detailed information.

Chemical-based sense of taste (Minute) – Your sense of taste is based on chemical reactions. Your civilisation is not advanced enough to view more detailed information.

Sense of pain/touch (Minor) – You have a sense of pain/touch. Your civilisation is not advanced enough to view more detailed information.

Being of flesh and blood (Minor) – Your life is dependent on your body, which consists loosely of the aforementioned materials. Without enough of these, you die. You also rely on the consumption of foods edible to your species.

Skills*

Farming (Expert) (High Common, Passive) 21.28% - You have extensive knowledge in the tools and trade of farming. You instinctively know the fertility of the land you are standing on, and the current season. You also have an increased weather prediction ability.

Herbalism (Advanced) (High Common, Passive) 47.36% - You know well how to care for plants and herbs, and you can easily tell what common herbs and plants are, and what they do. You don’t know much about rarer herbs, but your experience means you will instinctively know if a plant is poisonous, as long as it isn’t too rare. Increased ability to notice rare herbs.

Sewing (Basic) (Low Common, Passive) 76.93% - You have a basic level of knowledge on how to sew. Allows you to notice loose threads and fraying material easier, and slightly increases your ability to differentiate the quality of thread and cloth.

Tool Repair (Basic) (Low Common, Passive) 46.11% - You can repair basic tools, but you might want to consider a replacement instead. Allows you to notice damage on tools easier.

Logging (Advanced) (Mid Common, Passive) 9.78% - You can wield an axe with skill – if your opponent is a tree. Increased strength and reduced stamina usage when cutting trees, increased ability to notice wood quality and damage.

Common language-Spoken (Advanced) (Low Common, Passive) 13.01% - You can speak common fluently, but you don’t know many longer or rarely used words.

Common language-Written (Basic) (Mid Common, Passive) 49.32% - You can read and write, but don’t expect good calligraphy. You read and write slowly, and will make frequent errors.

Digging (Advanced) (Mid Common, Passive) 83.00% - You’re no dwarf, but you can sure dig a hole. You also know the difference between a shovel, spade and trowel. Increased skill when wielding a shovel, spade or trowel, increased ability to determine soil hardness, small instinctive ability to avoid buried stones, or find them if needed.

Cooking (Advanced) (Low Common, Passive) 17.28% - You can cook, but you’re no gourmet chef. Minute increase to taste of cooked dish, according to your preferences.

Hunting (Basic) (Low Common, Passive) 92.30% - You have learnt the basics of hunting. Increased ability to conceal yourself in forests and area with much greenery. Slightly increased senses when hunting. Minute instinctive ability to sense danger. Slightly increased tracking ability.

Tracking (Basic) (Low Common, Passive) 64.11% - You can recognise some of the basic signs left behind by incautious beings. Minutely increased ability to conceal yourself from your target.

Concealment (Basic) (Mid Common, Passive) 23.22% - You know a few tricks to hide yourself. When concealed, your basic senses are minutely increased.

Ranged weaponry-Bow (Basic) (Mid Common, Passive) 42.42% - You are capable of using bow and arrow at a basic level. Wind, target movement and other distractions hinder your accuracy greatly. Minutely increased vision when aiming at an enemy. +0.5 Strength and Dexterity when using a bow.

Ranged weaponry-Sling (Advanced) (Mid Common, Passive) 30.31% - You are experienced at using a sling and stones. Slightly increased ability to find stones or other items suitable as ammunition. +1 Strength and Dexterity when using a sling.

Melee weaponry – Staff (Basic) (Low Common, Passive) 5.64% - You have used a staff in a fight a few times, but you still don’t know how to use it correctly.

Melee weaponry – Club (Basic) (Low Common, Passive) 38.20% - You have a small amount of experience using simple blunt weapons. +1 Strength when using a club.

Melee weaponry – Sword - Longsword (Basic) (Mid Common, Passive) 76.89% - You have some experience using a standard longsword. Minutely increased grip strength when wielding this weapon, and +0.5 to Strength and Dexterity while wielding this weapon.

Magic edge (Basic) (Low Uncommon, Passive) 13.28% – You have discovered how to clad the edge of your blade in magic power, increasing the power of your strikes. However, you have little experience, and as such use all your mana in a single powerful attack.

That’s right, my only acquired title is insect bane. Insect bane! It’s practically useless! And my best skill is only Low uncommon! Skills go from Common, uncommon, rare, to unique, with each being further divided into low, mid and high, and my best is only four steps from the bottom.

It is still useful, even so. I have had a few times where that has saved my life, even if it has left me drained of mana for hours afterwards.

But I’m almost jealous of Gerald. That ability he talked about has to be at least a rare, maybe a unique. The gods are fair, I suppose. Gerald couldn’t do anything but use that ability in the beginning, from what I understand. A unique ability in exchange for my entire body and all my senses? No thanks.

Thinking of what Gerald has lost makes me appreciate sights like this even more. Surrounding the path in a sea are uncountable flowers, in a sea of colours shifting with the wind. As we walk along, I breathe in deeply through my nose, smelling the sweet scent the flowers gave off.

What is even better about this place is that the mix of aromas offends the sensitive noses of wolves, so it’s extremely rare to be attacked by monsters here.

Gerald’s voice sounds in my mind. ‘Twelve small four legged creatures heading towards us from your right.’

‘Okay, thanks.’ I reply.

But of course, we get attacked anyway. Looking over the shoulder of the man walking next to me, I see them approaching, barely visible above the flowers. Sighing, I alert the rest of the party.

“Cats approaching from the right.”

“Ooh, cats? Where? I love cats!” Exclaims Mary, the mage.

What’s to like about cats? They’re smelly, attack you if you get close and steal food. Metal rasps around me as everyone draws their weapons. I draw my own, and we spread out into a line to face the incoming cats.

Even Luke, the archer of the group, has drawn a blade. Accurate as he is, with such small and fast-moving targets, and at such a close range, he has no chance of hitting them.

“Why are we attacking them? They’re so cute!” Mary protests.

I beg to differ. Fur matted with mud, scars forming a network of lighter fur across their bodies, they are indeed the opposite of cute. They hiss loudly as they streak towards us.

Tony tries to explain to her. “We aren’t attacking them, Mary, they’re attacking us! Get out a weapon, it’ll be hard to hit with magic.”

As he finished talking, they are upon us. A brief fight consisting of many scratches and quite a few missed sword swings later, and we have some dead cats. And a sad mage.

“But why did they attack us?”

Tony sighs. “They’re animals. We wandered into their territory or they were running away from something. Doesn’t really matter.”

She lapses into silence. It really is a bit awkward, walking alongside someone you saved the life of, but they don’t know a thing. I still want to tell her, really. But although Gerald may be too careful, what he says makes sense… sometimes. I still wonder if he’s mad, despite what he says. I mean, there isn’t a title for being sane.

Wait, there isn’t, right?

It is a smooth trip back to the city after that. We show our adventurer’s licences to the guards and each pay a copper coin. Since adventurers, in a way, help protect the city by killing nearby monsters, we get a discount on the entrance fee.

After getting into the city, we head straight for the adventurer’s guild. Handing the proof of completion that the villagers had given us to the receptionist, we receive our pay; ten silvers. It’s an even split of two silvers per party member, and then we head our separate ways. Our party was only temporary. They asked me to join them because they weren’t sure if they could take monsters that can threaten a village with only four people.

They needn’t have bothered, it seems, and they probably regret missing out on a bit of money. As I look at my newly earned wealth, I frown. Ten silvers. It isn’t much to city folk, but for farmers in a small village, requesting this probably cost half their savings. Maybe less, if they shared the cost and considering that the guild pays a portion for such requests, but still, it’s a large cost. In the end, the adventurer’s guild isn’t a charity. They won’t pay the whole quest reward.

But there isn’t anything I can do to help, not now at least.

Wandering over to the request board, I have a look at it. It is unlikely there will be anything new since this morning, but I should at least check it. It hasn’t changed. It is mostly repeatable requests, the type that anyone could do any amount of times. These are generally simple, such as hunt a certain number of a monster, or collect a certain number of herbs from an area which monsters roam in.

Alchemists always need herbs, and monsters need to be as few as possible to increase the safety of farmers and merchants travelling to the city with their wares.

Leaving the adventurer’s guild, I look at the sky to see how late it is. The sun shines blue on the horizon as its bottom edge slinks slowly below the edge of the world.

Glancing further up, Teroc looks back down at me with a perpetual sneer.

Almost night, then. May as well get some food and go to sleep. Eating a simple, but filling meal at an eatery, I head to bed. Another tiring day passed.

…And then Gerald starts talking again. ‘Hey, just to break a flag or two, if anyone ever claims to have killed that spider matriarch, you just ignore them. If pressed, just say what everyone else is saying, even if it isn’t true.’

‘And you’re sure that you aren’t crazy? What have flags got to do with somebody lying about killing the spider matriarch? Was that what it was called?’ I reply.

‘Eh, don’t worry about it, just saying it just in case. The flags thing is a term from my past life, so don’t mind it not making sense.’ He says.

‘You completely ignored the crazy question.’ I point out.

‘Yes, it was called the spider matriarch.’ He replies. ‘Sounds like it was important in the spider world. Do Arachne exist in this world? Hope we don’t get chased by spider ladies, or spider men for that matter.’

‘Yes, but you’re ignoring it again!’ I press.

‘Hah, just joking with ya. I’m not crazy. I won’t refute weird or strange, but I’m not crazy. Well, goodnight.’

‘Oi!’

A steady ‘beep, beep, beep’ rings out in my head before disappearing entirely. His idea of a joke, I’m sure. It might be funnier if I actually understood what those beeps were. Or maybe not. Who knows with that guy.