DxD: Matsuda!

     Soft, warm,"Ugo I am so sleepy. So comfy, I don't want to move! Cotton candy?" Lick, I froze and my eyes shot open and realized where I was....

     No where my head is! My eyes roll up and are met with a pair of soft brown eyes. There were long strands of beautiful navy blue hair laying all over her bare chest and shoulders, and a very amused smile decorated the sexy woman in my horizon....

     I did notice a glowing halo above her head as well, giving me some recollection of why I might be in this awesome position! I am currently wearing my birthday suit, being hugged like a koala around my shoulders and waist! Oh did I mention what Kalawarna is wearing? She is currently wearing a matching birthday suit!

     I close my eyes like idiot Issei and pray,"Please God if this is a dream, never and I mean never let me wake up, Amen!"

     Kalawarna says,"Silly husband, you are very much awake now and I do not even mind that you drooled just a bit, it was cute." Damn that's not awkward!

     So I decided to grow up for a moment and ask,"Kalawarna what-"

     I was rudely interrupted and she miffed at me and said,"Try again husband!"

     "So Karen what-"

     She cut me off again and said,"Try again husband!" Damn I think my hyper cognitive thinking is broken!

     Cough "Kara dear what-"

     She is pouting now and says a bit upset,"Try, one more time, HUSBAND!"

     FUCK SHE IS PISSED, think brain we are at a danger zone!

     "My lovely and most beautiful wife, how long have I been sleeping?" I am my fucking dad now, with a wife that is better looking than me, I will cry later!

      She then smiled the most angelic smile like it was all a lie and said,"Dear it is currently late afternoon on Tuesday so you have been sleeping for about a day. But first you need to tell me how you are feeling before I tell you everything you need to know?"

     Huh? "Except the feeling of over sleeping I think I feel good, my Sacred Gear regenerates me so maybe it is doing its job? Oh and I feel like I have had the best sleep in months!" I add this just in case because it is soooo obvious she has been worried.

     She smiled at me and then started talking after she turned on the TV with a remote,"First let's talk about the important thing. Do not ever do something that stupid again! You almost died in my arms last night when you opened the [Gate To Heaven]! I am so mad because you shaved a bit of your lifespan to [Atone] me."

     At this point in her rant she has tightened her hold on me harder, almost uncomfortably and she continues,"BUT I still need to thank you for doing what you did. I know if you did not care you would never have done that. Now look." She points to the TV with the remote raising its sound, also she STILL has not let me go. I hope this is not a fucking Yandere flag!

     [Governments around the world are pointing fingers at one another, trying to figure out which nation's satellite crashed into Kuoh, Japan! According to local reports witnesses reported seeing the burning object that struck like a world ending meteor burst through the clouds and into the heart of the city. Fortunately only property damage was reported and it was a miracle no casualties were reported!] then the TV was shut off..........

     "And there you go, that is what the rest of the non-supernatural world saw last night. Normal people can't process things like seeing Heaven and just believe it to be scientific events. This is also caused by the energy of Heaven that calmed the masses minds. Remember the music you heard?" She looks at me like a school teacher expecting a good response!

      I nod my head in between the amazing mountains I had momentarily forgotten. FUCK these are huge!

     I respond fast,"Now that I have opened my gear, I now understand all the holy and light magic of Heaven. So basically the Heavenly music was a massive worldwide hypnotism for the weak minded to not cause mass hysteria!" sniff, She smells tasty.

     Kala smiles,"Smart husband, now to other topics before we can finally relax." She uses her massive strength to pull me up closer to her face to talk more easily?? Um this is bad, my little guy is approaching and is now touching the gates of Heaven and I am trying to keep the soldiers from charging without orders. Damn I am going to die!

     "I have already talked with Archangel Michal and given him a vague rundown of things. I did not tell him about your name of Matsuda, but I did tell him the one called Jesus Christ forgave my past and became my husband." DAMN is Kalawarna blushing?!

     She continues,"He has seen all the logs in the system about what happened and he knows about the fact you made it so I can't fall no matter what! He was very happy about that, he said I was the first fallen angel to ever receive the path back to Heaven. He wanted me to bring you there and I told him you refused. I did not want to make any decisions without talking to you first. Also due to me being an angel again. I need to spend more time in Heaven." Why does she look sad?

     She continues,"He asked me to return as soon as possible but I told him I am on my honeymoon! and would return on Sunday......" Fuck why is she giving me puppy eyes? Down boy! Think of stupid thoughts.

     She continued and I did not interrupt but just looked in her eyes,"On the bright side now that you can use holy magic we can talk to each other with magic circles all we want so it won't be rough. When you get stronger I can then stay by your side at all times, but right now you can be defeated by even low class exorcists, so Matsuda cant be known as Christ. You would be hunted by all of the Underworld and many other pantheons!" Damn that made little brother sad, good job honey!

     "So you blew up your phone and all your clothing last night and I took the liberty of calling your school to let them know you had a family emergency and would return Monday...." She trailed off at the end....

     I said,"Damn good thinking dear! Huh, what should I tell them?"

     She then gets an EVIL smile on her lips and pulls me a little too close and says the greatest thing ever in probably ALL of my lives!

     "You definitely can't tell them the truth! That you were consummating your marriage for four days straight now can you?" Kalawarna gives me a challenging smile.

     LITTLE BROTHER CHARGE! "I will love you forever my wife, Kalawarna!!!!!!!!!!!!!"