Dungeons Are Bad Business

For a moment, Vee thought he was caught up in some sort of nested dream. He looked around his office, seeing that everything was as it should be and resisting the sudden temptation to pull a fleur from his pocket so that he could spin it on the table to make sure it eventually fell down.

“How many dunpla figures do you have left?”

Micah shrugged. “Three full dungeon sets, one Alforde figure, and less than ten ghosts.”

Vee couldn’t believe his ears. “That’s it?”

“I guess they were more popular than you were thinking, boss,” Reginald said.

Vee nodded. “Absolutely. I figured some people would like them, but never thought they’d come close to selling out.”

He reached up and rubbed his chin. What was he going to do now? He’d given Brice Gilbert plenty of flattened ectoplasm sheets, but had no idea if the [Toymaker] had additional stock that could be delivered in a hurry. At best there’d be a supply of additional figures, but even if that was the case he still had to go talk to Torres about getting boxes for them. Then there was the work of actually packing the figures into boxes and getting them to the Lobby.

In other words, it was a lot to do and Vee wasn’t sure when he’d find time to do it. However, Vee also knew that it was something he had to do. Instinct told him that preserving the momentum on dunpla sales was critical for the dungeon’s future. They didn’t earn much money from any individual fleur sale, but since they were the supplier of the primary material that went into the figures they stood to profit significantly if the figures maintained their popularity.

This was a chance Vee didn’t want to miss. Despite what most people said, momentum was actually the most fickle of mistresses. It came and went as it pleased, didn’t care one whit about fairness, and was nearly impossible to predict. Should one be lucky enough to have it make an appearance on their behalf, their only actionable decision was how to best capitalize on it. Most of the time, that was simply running in its direction full force and hoping that it continued of its own accord. What did that look like right now though? Vee wasn’t sure.

He turned to Reginald. “In the event that we can’t get more dunpla figures in the next day, what can we do to keep people excited about the prospect of having them in the future?”

Reginald thought for a moment, then said, “We could always take pre-orders for a new collection.”

“But we don’t have a new collection planned or designed.”

The hat shrugged. “Details. I’m sure that you and Brice could come up with a theme and get it into production fast enough that it wouldn’t be a problem. Shipping it might be a bit of an issue, but there’s a decently robust network of carriages in the city that could get the dunpla figures to Shontsdale. There’s a shipping company there that handles a lot of cross-continent cargo. They’re expensive, but I’m sure they’d have the ability to get the figures anywhere we wanted them to go.”

“Ugh, that sounds like a lot of work,” Vee said. He could already feel the headache starting to form at the back of his head. Reginald’s plan made sense from a bird’s eye view, but Vee didn’t have the time or energy to go build an entire shipping apparatus. The same was true for an entire second collection of dunpla figures. Obviously adding new designs was a good goal to strive for, but not right now.

“I need something else,” Vee said. “Something we can do today, or at worst tomorrow.”

“Give me some time to think,” Reginald said. “In the meantime, let’s see what kind of backup supply Brice has on hand and go from there. It’s possible that he’s got dozens more figures ready to go and we’re worried for nothing. Let’s go see him after today’s runs. For now, I guess we have no choice but to put up a sign that says something about how we’re temporarily out of stock.”

Turning to Micah, Vee asked, “Do you think that people would be willing to pre-order new figures even if they couldn’t get them that day?”

The [Baker] shrugged. “Maybe? It’s hard to say. People do seem really excited about them, but I don’t know if that would be the case if they weren’t right there for the taking, you know? That said, I don’t think there’s any harm in trying.”

True. Vee frowned; he would have liked to have had a better plan in place, but sometimes things just didn’t work out that way. Thanking Micah for bringing the matter to his attention, the [Dungeon Master] returned his attention to the run happening down in Crestheart below.

Faced with a large gap and a series of floating platforms, a heavyset level 14 [Spirit Blaster] had his hands extended and a look of intense concentration on his face. Vee briefly wondered what he was doing, then noticed a strange deformation on the nearest platform: one of the ends was drooping like an ice cream cone on a hot day.

“Hey, knock that off,” Vee said into the magnifying crystal, his voice booming into the room. “Stop destroying the platform!”

“Why?” the adventurer asked. “There’s nothing in the rules that says the dungeon can’t be destroyed, right? I’m simply doing what I need to do in order to clear the room.”

Vee looked over at Reginald, who shook back and forth to indicate that the adventurer was right; there wasn’t anything in the rules that outlawed destroying the dungeon itself. Some amount of collateral damage was to be expected during runs, of course, but this wasn’t a skill gone astray or an adventurer being ignorant of their full strength. This was deliberate, though Vee couldn’t understand how destroying the platform would allow the adventurer to cross the gap.

The answer became clear a moment later. Bringing his hands together, the [Spirit Blaster] said, “[Reconstruct Spirit Matter: Bridge]!”

Perhaps it was a bit elitist of him, but Vee couldn’t help but smirk at the poor excuse for a bridge that appeared in the air in front of the adventurer. Though it was similar in color to one of his own ectoplasmic creations, the shape was simple and it looked…cheap. Thin, and far too flexible.

Sure enough, it bent and bowed beneath the adventurer’s weight, though the man was able to get across the gap without it snapping the way Vee had expected it to.

As if he’d sensed Vee’s judgment, the adventurer looked up toward the observation crystal and made an obscene gesture before continuing to the next room, which was also filled with platforms.

“Some people,” Vee said quietly, feeling a surge of manic encouragement that had to be coming from his [Guy-Who-Takes-Things-Way-Too-Far] class. He wasn’t sure why the [Spirit Blaster] was being so rude, but if that was the way the adventurer wanted to do things he could accommodate. Though his ability to escalate was somewhat limited due to the rules of the development committee, he still had a wide degree of latitude in controlling rooms for each run. Plus, the agents behind him were completely engrossed in their card game and unlikely to notice him putting his fist on the proverbial scales. That was the important bit.

Sitting down at his console and stretching his fingers like he was a [Master Pianist] about to perform before an audience, Vee cranked every knob that was a part of the next room all the way to the right to increase their speed to the max.

As such, instead of a wide open room with a collection of smoothly moving platforms that formed a path of sorts up to a switch suspended from a rope on the ceiling, the jerkventurer was treated to a frantic and chaotic mess of platforms jerking back and forth at top speed while a series of snow-themed trap crystals activated on their own accord. A chilly mist settled over the floor, and in the center of the office Dheart groaned something terrible. This was not something that the dungeon heart could sustain for long or do terribly often, it seemed.

However, for the moment Vee was fine letting it run; the adventurer clearly had no idea how he was supposed to progress. He looked back and forth, his confusion writ plain on his face, and Vee couldn’t resist activating the magnification crystal to gloat.

“We call this room ‘The Consequence of Our Actions Made Manifest’,” Vee said, making his voice as obnoxiously saccharine as he could manage. “Think of it as a roometic representation of that gesture you just made. Good luck, challenger!”

For good measure he hit another button to activate a nearby [Ice Geyser] trap, sending a spray of small and jagged ice pieces at the [Spirit Blaster].

The adventurer scowled up at the crystal and held up his arm to block them, then started moving forward toward the nearest platform.

Reginald squinted over at Vee. “Roometic? I don’t think that’s a word, boss.”

The [Dungeon Master] waved his hand. “Details.”

[Congratulations, you are now a Guy-Who-Takes-Things-Way-Too-Far Level 7 !]

[You can now use the Grudge Mark skill!]

[Devious Mind +1!]

Closing his eyes, Vee consulted his soul’s mirror about his new skill.

[Grudge Mark: By focusing your malevolent desires on a target, you can inflict them with the Minor Hex status ailment for thirty minutes.]

Further examination revealed what Minor Hex actually did: it negated a single instance of any luck-based skill used by the affected person. Vee himself didn’t have any skills like that, but plenty of classes did. Metaphysical dice rolls and coin flips were an all too-common element of daily life for all sorts of people.

It wasn’t the most useful skill in the world, Vee thought, but perhaps he could find a way to use it against any [Gambler] type adventurers who came into the dungeon. Otherwise it’d probably end up like far too many skills: unused and largely forgotten about.

A giant block of ice slid across the floor and smashed the adventurer into the wall. Despite his best efforts to free himself, more traps activated and kept him in place. A few flailing moments later, the adventurer gave up his run and Vee deactivated the room.

“Wow, jeez…that guy must have really gotten under your skin,” Micah said awkwardly, and Vee’s eyes snapped open while his cheeks grew warm. Crap. He’d…kind of forgotten that the [Baker] was still there. Stammering, he started to explain himself but was stopped from doing so by Reginald.

“The [Dungeon Master] takes manners seriously,” the hat said gravely. “Very seriously. Do you understand?”

Micah nodded and stood up quickly. A little too quickly, perhaps. “I see that. I’m, uh, going to get back down to the lobby. I’ll go ahead and put that sign up too when I get there, okay? I’ll tell people that more dunpla figures are on the way. Have a, uh, good rest of your day!”

When the [Baker] was gone, Vee turned to Reginald and asked, “Do you think he thinks I’m nuts now?”

“Nah, he’s just a bit shaken,” the hat said, flapping his brim. "He’s a nice kid; he isn’t used to that type of thing. But you’ve got a rep to protect, boss, and that was a nice bit of showmanship. I’m sure that before the day is done the news will be out that anyone who thinks they can just smash their way through the dungeon will think twice.”

Vee sank back in his chair, his emotions settling after the surge brought about by his class.

One of the agents behind him coughed. Vee turned and looked back. Both the agents had set down their cards. They both looked rather serious.

“We couldn’t help but notice that you seemed to go above and beyond on stopping that adventurer. While you’re allowed some degree of discretion in how you deal with dungeon challengers, that was pretty obviously an unfair set of changes you put into practice there. Especially given your conversation with your associate afterwards.”

Vee’s mouth went dry.

“I didn’t think you’d notice,” he mumbled.

One of the agents smiled. “You wouldn’t be the first [Dungeon Master] to think that. My associate and I can both use [Eyes In The Back Of My Head], which lets us keep an eye on dungeon runs while we’re doing something else.”

Seeing Vee’s increasingly horrified expression, the agent smiled. “Now don’t worry, you’re hardly the first [Dungeon Master] who’s lost their cool with a challenger. Still, the rules exist for a reason and it’s not okay to violate them just because you’re upset. However, since this is your first offense, we’ll just go ahead and ask you to refund his entry fee and that’ll be the end of it. Any more displays like that, though, and we’ll have to start fining you. One gold fleur per additional offense. Understand?”

Vee nodded, his cheeks warm once again. That was a pretty hefty fine. Way more than he'd been expecting. The momentary satisfaction he’d gotten from his actions was definitely not worth that much money. He’d have to work harder to keep a lid on his temper from now on.

“You should probably go check on those platforms,” Reginald said. “I’m not sure if the [Dungeon Maintainers] have the resources to get things up and running right away. I”ll go ahead and announce a short delay in the meantime.”

Vee sighed. “Yeah, good point. I’ll go see what I can salvage out of them.”

Getting up, he walked across the office and headed down to the dungeon so that the next runs could get rolling as quickly as possible.

Main Character Sheets:

Vee Vales:

Primary Class: G-h-o-s-t M-a-e-s-t-r-o? (Locksmagister University), Level 33

Secondary Class: Dungeon Master (Oar’s Crest), Level 24

Tertiary Class: Guy-Who-Takes-Things-WAY-Too-Far (Self), Level 7 (+1)

Might: 15

Wit: 41

Faith: 25

Adventurousness: 7

Ambition: 16

Plotting: 19

Charisma: 17

Devious Mind: 29 (+1)

Leadership: 22

Guts: 14

Intimidating Presence: 11

Citizenship: 24

Public Relations: 8

Determination: 7

Persuasiveness: 6

Bargaining: 4

Patience: 3

Competitive Spirit: 1

Pragmatism: 1

<3<3 Infatuation <3<3

Alforde Armorsoul (Unchanged):

Primary Class: Hammer Specialist (Self), Level 6

Secondary Class: Right-hand man (Vee Vales), Level 18

Tertiary Class: Dungeon Champion (Oar’s Crest), Level 18

Additional Class: Glaciernaut (Sacha Silverblade), Level 11

Might: 58

Wit: 15

Faith: 28

Adventurousness (Bound – Vee Vales): 9

Endurance: 33

Intimidating Presence: 15

Heart of a Champion: 14

Citizenship (Bound – Vee Vales): 9

Vigilance: 11

Vanity: 2

Single-Mindedness: 1

Reginald:

Primary Class: Core Spirit (Unknown), Level ???

#$&Q#$)(@#$#@#$%!@#$##%#%()@#$**@@##

Secondary Class: Loudmouth (Self), Level 43

Tertiary Class: Majordomo (Vee Vales), Level 21

Additional Class: Announcer (Vee Vales), Level 14 (+1)

Additional Class: Hyperthymesiac (Self), Level 5

Might: 1

Wit: 37

Faith: 17

Ambition: 28

Greed: 24

Deceptiveness: 27

Manipulativeness: 42

$#&*!@!!: !!!

Loyalty: 47 (+1)

Patience: 11

Irritability: 25

Remorsefulness: 17

Expository Prowess: 23

#%$Pragmatism*#$: @#61$5

Hop@#!! @#$@!@#

@#$@%%^

#4^5#*&_!+++#(@$#

Citizenship (Bound – Vee Vales): 9