Dissent and Daffodils

Lilith drove recklessly back to her apartment, slamming the car door behind her as she hurried inside. Leaning against the closed door, she felt her heart racing from the reckless stunt she had just pulled. Her mind was overwhelmed with thoughts of reports, complaints, and her career. More than anything, she was furious with herself for giving in to her impulses. There had been no consent, and without that, it felt like molestation. The thought of Hazel potentially feeling violated made her heart race even more.

Consumed by anger at her own choices, Lilith punched the wall next to her—not just once or twice, but over and over again, delivering ten hard blows until her hand was bruised and bloodied.

Gradually, her mind began to clear. She looked down at her injured hand in disbelief and shook her head in disappointment. After removing her coat, she washed off the blood and bandaged her hand. Knowing she had classes the next day, she retreated to her room to prepare. Lilith made some notes, then closed her laptop and took some painkillers.

Finally, she crawled into bed, allowing herself to drift off as the pain began to subside.

The next day, Lilith attended her class with a battered hand. She arranged her notes and tried to write, but her hand hurt, and she hid her pain behind a cold demeanor. Since her hand ached a lot, she wrote less than usual. She felt relieved knowing there was no report against her. However, guilt over revealing her identity to Hazel was eating at her.

As students were copying notes, Lilith leaned against the table, observing them. When she noticed Hazel looking at her with a concerned expression, their eyes met for a few seconds before Lilith looked away.

Soon, the class came to an end. As Lilith was collecting her things, Hazel approached her. "Professor, did you get hurt?" Hazel asked.

"It's nothing, just banged my hand against a wall," Lilith replied, avoiding eye contact.

"But it looks pretty bad," Hazel said, concern evident in her voice.

"Well, don't worry about it. I'll take care of it. Thanks for your concern," Lilith replied dismissively. Hazel smiled a little and started to walk out the door.

"Ms. Ashford," Lilith called after Hazel. Hazel turned around, tilting her head, waiting for Lilith to continue. "Please come to my office to choose your assignment topic," Lilith added.

Hazel nodded in understanding, and Lilith walked before her to the office. "Ms. Ashford, please sit down," Lilith motioned to the chairs in front of the table.

Hazel settled into one of the chairs. Lilith took a seat in front of her after leaving her coat and bag on the table, bringing the file of topics for Hazel to choose from. Each topic had a designation marking it as either taken or available. Hazel chose the Fibonacci Sequence in Nature and Art and showed the topic name to Lilith. Lilith reached out to take the file, and in doing so, her hand slightly brushed against Hazel's. Hazel felt a jolt at the touch, similar to the sensation from last night in the washroom.

Lilith looked down at the file, heat creeping under her collar. "Fine then, this topic is all yours, Ms. Ashford," Lilith said without looking up.

Hazel was pulled out of her daydream by Lilith's voice. She quickly scrambled out of the office after exchanging pleasantries.

After Hazel left, Lilith loosened her tie and opened a button on her shirt. Being so close to Hazel had made her feel overheated. She gulped down cold water and leaned back in her chair, rubbing her temples. This little infatuation was developing into something bigger, which could ruin not only her career but also her mind and heart if it went awry.