Crazy Britain:They’re All Raising Me

Without giving the automaton any further chance to act, Will gripped its chainsaw-wielding arm, and with his other hand, brought a brutal downward punch to its head. The strike smashed its cranium straight into its chest cavity, sending springs and gears scattering in all directions.

"Amazing!"

Was this the legendary hero saving the damsel?

The sight instantly filled Ritsuka Fujimaru with joy and admiration. She even jumped up in excitement—only to have another automaton suddenly lunge at her from behind. Its arm came swinging toward the back of her head. She heard the rush of wind and turned pale with fear.

"Idiot."

Will muttered under his breath and took a quick half-step back. Then with a swift backward kick, he shattered the automaton's torso. Without pausing, he reached out and wrapped one arm around Ritsuka's waist, effortlessly hoisting her up and tucking her under his arm like a parcel.

"W-W-Whaaa?!"

Suddenly being lifted like that made Ritsuka yelp in shock.

"Don't scream, idiot," Will said coldly. "If you slow me down again, I'll throw you away like the dead weight you are."

At that, Ritsuka immediately covered her mouth and nodded furiously like a pecking chick.

Despite herself, being held like this in such a dangerous situation sent her heart pounding—and also gave her a strange sense of security.

This situation oddly resembled some of her old girlish fantasies.

—Except she was being carried under his arm like luggage.

Still, even though they had been through three Singularities already, this was her first time being carried through an enemy horde by a hot guy.

"Good."

Seeing her cooperate, Will nodded slightly. He turned and charged straight for Mash, who was still surrounded, casually smashing the automatons in his way to pieces like they were toys.

He leapt into the air, stepping on the shoulders of the automatons behind him, and in a few quick strides, landed by Mash's side.

"Watch your Master."

With that, he flung Ritsuka toward Mash, who caught her in a panic. Then Will drew the massive sword on his back and turned toward the enemy horde.

The wind howled, clouds swirled—

The great windmill began to spin!

Like a tiger among sheep, Will's sword spun like a helicopter blade. Everywhere it passed, automaton limbs and gears flew into the air like a rain of steel. Even though the automatons kept charging in, his sword moved in a dense, impenetrable arc, like a shield of steel.

Since they weren't truly living creatures, these automatons had high endurance. Even decapitated, they could still move. So Will opted for the simplest method: smash them all to bits.

He was a tornado tearing through a parking lot—everywhere he went, destruction followed. In mere minutes, the entire street, once clogged with automatons, had become a field of sparking wreckage. Not a single one remained standing.

"Incredible!" Ritsuka gasped, eyes sparkling. She was completely starstruck.

That swordplay—so cool!

Sure, he had a terrible personality, but wow—he was really insanely strong and, she had to admit, insanely cool.

"All right, job's done."

Sliding his sword back into its scabbard, Will turned to the girls.

"Hey, stop gawking. Time to move."

"R-Right!" Ritsuka nodded quickly and shot Mash a look. The two of them hustled to catch up with him.

By now, Ritsuka was completely clear on what to do next.

This so-called dream space still offered zero clues. All they knew was that it was swarming with too many enemies—and possibly a terrifying mastermind.

With no other Servants available for help, and Mash being only a demi-Servant, just dealing with fodder enemies was enough to overwhelm them.

So, before talking about clearing the Singularity—they needed to survive.

That left only one answer:

—Cling to this man who seemed to know something. Cling to him and don't let go.

But just as Ritsuka was making these calculations, Will suddenly stopped in front of a shop.

"Hm, this one... if I remember right, they should sell it here."

Murmuring to himself, he nodded.

Curious, Ritsuka crept up beside him and asked, "Um, Lord Hyde, is there something we need from this store?"

She glanced at the storefront—it just looked like a regular clothing shop.

Will didn't answer her directly. Instead, he arched a brow and looked at her.

"What are you supposed to call me again?"

"Uh..." Ritsuka blinked. Her cheeks flushed red again as she ducked her head and murmured, "...M-Master..."

"Oh, not bad. Seems you haven't forgotten." Will snapped his fingers in satisfaction, then pointed toward the shop.

"Well then, since you understand your position, go inside and pick out a maid outfit. Put it on."

"M-Maid outfit?!" Ritsuka gawked.

"Oh? You have a problem with that?" Will gave her a one-eyed smirk. "You're my maid now. Isn't it only proper to wear a uniform while working?"

"But... Master needs to wear her Chaldea Mystic Code to maintain the mana supply..."

Mash, unable to stay silent any longer, stepped forward to intervene.

"And?"

Will shot back, "You think that's my concern?"

"Huh? I mean... shouldn't it be?" Mash looked baffled.

"Let's be clear here," Will sneered. "I'm the one your beloved senpai calls 'Master.' Got it?"

"So obviously, I give the orders. I tell my servant what to do, and how she makes it happen isn't my concern. She's a servant. She should act like one. Don't come whining to me about how difficult it is. Got it?"

"I..."

Mash wanted to argue, but couldn't find a solid retort. After a few moments of hesitation, she bowed her head and said:

"If that's the case, then please let me be the one to wear the maid outfit—"

"No thanks," Will cut in, raising a hand. "I'm not interested in seeing you in one. Your senpai, though? Her in a maid outfit, plus that unwilling little pout of yours? That sounds far more entertaining."

"Besides," he added, "with how little that Mystic Code boosts her, I'd rather she put on something easier on the eyes. You can stick to playing bodyguard."

"Ugh..."

Mash let out a low whimper of defeat and hung her head.

"I'm sorry, senpai... it's all because I'm useless..."

"Um..."

Ritsuka had heard enough to know that the smart move was just to go along with it. But as a girl, she couldn't help but protest—just a little.

"But... I never agreed to be a maid... Mmph—!"

She didn't get to finish. Will raised a hand and gently lifted her chin with his fingers.

The moment his fingertips touched her skin, a near-electric shiver shot down her spine. Her cheeks grew hotter, and the words she'd wanted to say instantly vanished from her throat.

"Oh, if you don't want to be a maid, that's fine too."

Hearing that, Ritsuka brightened a little.

"S-So that means—"

Will's next sentence hit her brain like a system crash.

"But you did call me 'Master,' didn't you? If that wasn't as a maid, then I guess you were doing it as a pet?"

"I don't mind. In that case, forget the maid outfit. Go inside and find a cat ear or dog ear headband. Then we'll visit a pet shop and pick out a collar."

"Ehhhhhh?!"

After a few seconds of stunned silence, Ritsuka's brain finally processed what he meant. She jumped up in a panic.

"N-No no no! I think being a maid is just fine!"

"You sound so reluctant." Will gave her an evil grin as he eyed her glowing red face. "Guess we're heading to the pet shop, then—"

"I'm sorry, Master! I was wrong!"

With that despairing cry, Ritsuka spun around and dashed into the shop. Her mind was still overheating from their interaction, and her steps were so unsteady that she bumped right into the doorway.

"Oof."

Watching this, Will stroked his chin thoughtfully.

"She's kinda clumsy... Is she even capable of serving tea without tripping over herself?"

Mash could only sniffle in silence, once again mourning her own uselessness.

After a long wait—long enough for Will to get impatient—Ritsuka finally emerged from the store, awkward and bashful in her new outfit.

To Will's surprise, she hadn't chosen one of the more modest long-skirted uniforms.

Instead, she came out in something far more... revealing.

Clearly uncomfortable, she took small, hesitant steps. But the black stockings clinging to her long, slender legs only made the outfit more striking.

The frilly white trim on her skirt didn't even fully cover the skin above her thighs. The small section of bare flesh between the skirt hem and the top of her stockings—her "absolute territory"—was framed by tight garters and pristine lace, making her pale thighs look even whiter.

Feeling Will's heated gaze, Ritsuka blushed furiously. She tried to tug the skirt down, but it was hopeless. She gave up with a pout and turned her head away, not daring to meet his eyes.

"Oh? I'm impressed."

After soaking in the view, Will chuckled.

"I thought you'd go for something modest. I was ready to make you change again."

"I didn't have much choice..."

Still not looking at him, Ritsuka mumbled.

"All the skirts in the shop were either too long and got in the way, or way too short... This one was the only one I could move properly in... And I wanted to keep as much of the Chaldea gear as possible, but all I could keep were the stockings... And they weren't long enough, so... this was all I could do."

"Hah." Will shook his head. "Where'd that clever little mind of yours go? You should've said, 'I picked it to please my Master.' Simple."

"Ugh..."

Ritsuka let out a whimper. Some odd emotion had made her forget to say that.

But driven by that same emotion, she kept tugging at her skirt while sneaking glances at Will.

Finally, she asked in a small voice:

"So... Master... Do you like it?"

"...Hmph."

Will stepped forward, silently straightened the slightly crooked bow on her collar, and muttered:

"Don't go calling yourself my 'lackey' again. Sounds crass. Doesn't suit your image."

"You're Hyde's maid. Say it properly, got it?"

He paused, then added:

"And about that whole 'saving humanity' business... Hmph. Since I'm in a good mood thanks to you, I'll lend a hand."

But Ritsuka didn't jump for joy like he expected. Instead, she turned her head and asked again:

"So... do I look good or not?"

"...Meh." Will replied blandly.

"Oh..."

Ritsuka looked crestfallen—then something clicked. She glanced at him again.

Will wasn't looking at her anymore. He'd turned his head away.

Like she'd discovered a secret, Ritsuka's eyes lit up.

"Oho~" she teased, drawing out the syllable. "So the mean, greedy Master is actually a shy guy? Don't tell me... you haven't been with many girls before?"

"Are you stupid?"

Will shot her a glare and turned back down the road.

"Enough. Let's go. We've got work to do."

Ritsuka watched his steps—quicker than before—and exchanged a glance with Mash.

Then she grinned like a cat who caught the mouse.

"Watch and learn, Mash," she whispered. "I think I've figured out what kind of guy he is... Time to turn the tables!"

"...Huh?"

Mash stared, baffled, as her senpai skipped ahead with an oddly cheerful air.