Convict Unit: Black Parade

Ghost clicked her tongue, pushing away the lollipop Jae-hee was waving enthusiastically.

“Brat. Do I look like the type who likes sweets?”

Jae-hee tilted his head. “You could be, right? You’re not?”

“Think about what I usually enjoy.”

“Uh, let’s see…”

Ghost’s usual vices.

Cigarettes. Coffee. Alcohol.

“…Hmm.”

Her favorite foods.

Tuna ramen, gamja-tang, soybean paste stew…

“Uh…”

After a moment of thought, Jae-hee asked cautiously, “You don’t like sweets, do you?”

“Nope.”

“I see.”

“Right?”

Ghost grabbed a handful of lollipops from Jae-hee’s outstretched hand and casually tossed them aside.

Clatter-clatter-clatter!

The candy landed neatly inside an open cupboard.

“Still, I’ll acknowledge the effort. I’ll consider trying one someday.”

“It really doesn’t seem like you will!”

“It was a huge effort for me just to put them in there instead of the trash can.”

“Since you’re already making an effort, why not go a little further?! Let’s quit smoking! We can do it!”

In response, Ghost struck a match—flick—and lit the cigarette dangling from her lips.

Jae-hee clutched his head in despair. “Nooo!”

“Hooooo…”

The slender Esse burned smoothly. Then, with a theatrical whoosh, she blew a cloud of smoke right at Jae-hee.

“There. If you don’t want secondhand smoke, get lost.”

“Master, you’re so mean!”

Jae-hee shot up, a look of profound betrayal on his face as he pinched his nose. 

But just as he was about to leave, Ghost beckoned him back. “No, wait. Don’t go.”

“Huh? Oh, does that mean you’ll quit…?”

“What are you talking about? Do the dishes before you go.”

“Ah.”

And so, while Ghost smoked and read the newspaper, Jae-hee had to wash the dishes, blinking back tears.

“Master, you’re seriously the worst!”

“Yep. I hear that a lot.”

Brushing off her disciple’s whining, Ghost stubbed out her half-smoked cigarette in the ashtray and frowned.

She hadn’t noticed it for decades.

But for some reason, the smell of smoke felt a little sickening today.

She glanced silently at Jae-hee’s miserable back as he did the dishes in the stuffy, unventilated cell.

…I should stop smoking indoors, she thought.

She had absolutely no intention of quitting, not even if she died.

***

Deck 1, the men’s communal shower.

“Razor bro. If someone told you to stop drinking milk, could you do it?” Jae-hee asked while they were all cleaning the showers together.

Squatting down to clear debris from a drain, Razor shot back in annoyance.

“What kind of bullshit is that, you little ass? Where am I supposed to get my calcium, then? Gonna stir-fry some anchovies for me?”

“No, I don’t mean for nutritional reasons. I mean, like, mentally? Could you do it?”

“I mean, I could,” Razor said, crossing his arms with a thoughtful hum. “But I’ve been drinking it out of habit for the last ten years. My throat would probably miss it.”

“You could solve the thirst with something else, couldn’t you?”

“If I’m gonna do it anyway, might as well be with milk. Why switch to something else?”

“Ah, so that’s the logic.”

Seeing Jae-hee at a loss for words, Razor jabbed a finger at him. “Enough of that. Get back to cleaning. I want those mirrors sparkling.”

“Ugh.”

As he sprayed and wiped the mirrors, Jae-hee grumbled, “Why does the Deck Leader have to do this kind of work…?”

“The little bastard’s really starting to sound like a tyrant. Oi! You’re the one who promised not to rule over us! Then the Deck Leader should set an example by cleaning with everyone else.”

“Urrrk… urge to dominate… must become tyrant…”

After polishing the mirror until it shone, Jae-hee wiped the sweat from his brow and asked, “If I move up, will I not have to clean anymore?”

“You can probably pay for a cleaning service with Credits. If you can’t afford it, it’s the same deal. You gotta clean up your own shit.”

Razor moved to the next drain, squatted, and began scraping out gunk with a small blade made from his fingernail. “And the higher you go, the more Credits your basic living expenses cost. They say the price of hiring a cleaner on Deck 2 versus Deck 8 is like night and day.”

“So it’s not necessarily better to move up?”

Jae-hee thought of the couple he’d met earlier, Silken Bodhisattva and Little Lamb. Hadn’t they been whining about having no Credits left?

“Life seems pretty tough for the inmates on Deck 8, too.”

“The hell? Man, if I had a penny for every gutterborn fool bleeding their hearts for the rich… Listen, punk! Even if those cunts were rolling in shit on Deck 8, they’d still have it better than us.”

Just then, a few inmates who had been cleaning the adjacent toilets came stumbling out, gagging. That side was a literal shit-field.

“Hmm.”

Watching the other prisoners create a defensive barrier of soap and water against the smell, Jae-hee suddenly blurted out, “Honestly, I think living on Deck 1 is pretty great.”

“What?”

“Everyone seems fun, and I don’t find life here inconvenient at all. Maybe it’s because I’m used to living poor?”

Jae-hee watched the inmates laughing and splashing water at each other, then scratched his head and looked at Razor.

“Should I just stay on Deck 1?” he asked.

“What kinda crazy talk is that? You have to move up.”

“Why?”

“So I can take back this dec—I mean,” Razor coughed, shoving his true intentions back down.

He met Jae-hee’s eyes with a serious expression. “What I meant is, when the big fish move up, the little fish get to spread their wings. It’s a necessary part of the ecosystem’s cycle.”

“Ah…”

“Why do you think Deck 1 is called the ‘Newbie Hunting Ground’?”

“Because newbies get hunted when they arrive?”

“No… well. It’s not not true.”

As someone who had tried to hunt Jae-hee, Razor couldn’t exactly deny it.

He cleared his throat loudly and wagged his index finger. “Anyway, it means it’s a place for newbies to level up and move on from.”

“Oh, so that’s what it means.”

“…To be honest, it also means hunting newbies, but whatever! The first meaning is more important.”

Jae-hee propped his chin on his hand and scratched it. “But even if I wanted to move up, you said the Deck 2 Leader is crazy strong, right? What if I can’t beat them?”

“Yeah. She’s crazy strong. But do you really need to beat her? Just kneel and get in line.”

“Ehh?”

Razor’s tune had changed in a hurry. Last time, he was telling him to win and become a deck commander…

“Y’know, think about that dude from China. Genshin or whatever. He crawled between some thug’s legs to bide his time. If you want to conquer the world, you need that kind of patience.”

Jae-hee corrected him. “That was Han Xin, not Genshin…”

Razor grumbled, “Yeaaah yeaaah Mr. Big Shot. For sucking so badly in English, you sure know your Chinese.”

“Well, the place I grew up in was a bit strange…”

Just then, Status Window, who had been mopping in the distance, ran over with a bright expression.

“Genshin?! Did someone say Genshin desu?!”

“What. What is it now? What set off this damn otaku’s trigger? Get back to mopping the floor.” Razor shooed him away.

Mumbling, “Did I mishear?” Status Window tilted his head and shuffled off with his mop.

Jae-hee turned back to Razor. “So, why is the Deck 2 Leader considered invincible?”

“It’s her ability. You see, it’s…”

Suddenly, a young woman’s voice echoed from the shower entrance.

“Hey. Are you two gossiping about me?”

Razor turned, recognized the speaker, and gasped, his face hardening.

Not knowing who she was, Jae-hee just blinked.

She was a woman with thick, round glasses and a stocky, fleshy build. She wore a tight, short-sleeved shirt, and her wide, exposed forearms were tattooed with a snake piercing a skull.

Razor clicked his tongue and whispered to Jae-hee, “That’s her.”

“Huh?”

“That’s the Deck 2 Leader.”

“Woah!”

Deck 2—also known as ‘The Ladder.’

The callsign of its leader was…

“What are you doing here, Jail Mojik!”

That was it.

Jae-hee repeated the name, confused. “Huh? Jail Mojik?”

It sounded like the name of some famous old company.

“Yeah. Her ability lets her turn any material into durable rope. She even runs a business with it in here. A prison textile business… hence, ‘Jail Mojik (毛織).’”

“Ah. Such a deep meaning…” Jae-hee muttered soullessly, a pained look on his face.

What kinda tacky, low-effort callsign is that…? I mean, I know people get weird nicknames for all sorts of reasons, but still…

“Hey, newbie. You said you were curious about my ability?” Jail Mojik gave Jae-hee a smirk and snapped her fingers. “Well this is it.”

Snap!

Her thumb and middle finger met with a crisp sound, while her index finger pointed at her target.

And the target was…

“Huh?”

…Status Window, who was humming an unintelligible Japanese song as he pushed his mop.

“Why are you looking at me… Gyaaaack?!”

Suddenly, Status Window’s prison uniform tore itself to shreds, the threads re-forming into ropes that bound his entire body.

“Nngyaaaah!”

“Windowww!”

Tied up in dozens of ropes, Status Window collapsed to the floor.

Jae-hee rushed to help him, but Status Window quickly stopped him.

“N-no, I’m fine desu! You don’t have to come…!”

Jae-hee froze, blinking in confusion. “What?”

“I said I’m fine… Actually, this is perfect desu.”

“What is?”

“Don’t ask, just leave me beeeeee!”

As the ropes tightened, Status Window’s back arched like a bow.

Ignoring the grotesque display, Jail Mojik sneered. “As you can see, my ability is ‘Weaving.’ I can weave ropes even from a distance.”

A binding ability. And a remote one at that.

She couldn’t kill her opponents, but she could easily subdue them.

A superb containment specialist. That was Jail Mojik.

Only then did Jae-hee understand what Razor had meant when he said she was invincible inside the prison.

Abilities were ninety-nine percent restricted in this place, and there was almost no way to avoid that long-range binding.

Once she had you, she could have her subordinates beat you up, hand you over to the guards, or deal with you however she pleased.

“You asked why I was here, didn’t you, Razor?”

Having finished her demonstration, Jail Mojik strode toward him.

Razor gritted his teeth. “This is the men’s shower. Get out.”

“That’s why I’m here.”

“What?”

Jail Mojik smiled nonchalantly. “My deck is doing a big cleanup too, but we ran out of bleach. I came to borrow some.”

“…”

“Just one bottle. With so many people on Deck 1, surely you must have plenty of supplies?”

Razor glared at her, then glanced at Jae-hee. “Is it okay, Deck Leader?”

“Huh?”

“You’re the leader, idiot. I’m your subordinate. You either approve it or deny it.”

“Uh… yes. You can borrow it.”

Jail Mojik waved at Jae-hee. “Thanks~”

Razor went to the storage closet, retrieved a bottle of bleach, and handed it to her. “Here, take it. And don’t you ever set foot on Deck 1 agai—”

Just then, Jail Mojik snatched away the bleach with one hand while slinging her other arm over Razor’s shoulder.

The move trapped Razor in her embrace.

Jail Mojik smiled with satisfaction. “Remember when I confessed? I still have a thing for you, Razor.”

“…”

“Miss Hellth is dead, so you don’t have a keeper anymore, do you?” Jail Mojik’s index finger gently traced the line of Razor’s jaw. “How about it? Wanna… play rough with me?”

“…Grgh.”

Blushing, Razor turned his head and bit his lower lip.

Watching this unfold, Jae-hee and the sprawled-out Status Window simultaneously covered their mouths and squealed like girls.

“W-what did she say~?!”