Conscious, Conscientious

Skrili’s eyes shot open.

In her sleep, she must have sensed the unusual lack of warmth. Only Mamma slept beside her.

Akri was gone.

She lunged to her feet, the early morning darkness shrouding the tent.

“Akri! Akri!”

Silence.

She whipped through the tent opening and tried to search outside.

“AKRI?! Get back in here!”

The air was too still.

Despite circling the tent and even daring to check around the ones nearby, her little brother was nowhere to be found.

She rushed back. The world was slipping away, and her body grew more weightless with every desperate footstep.

Skrili paused at the tent entrance when her foot landed on something cool and soft. She looked down to find a white flower crumpled into the dirt.

Peering outward once more, only one thing had changed. But it was enough to fill her heart with utter despair.

Omniflowers had sprouted in a clear, straight line under the sleepy blue sky.

And they led in the exact direction of the Arnlekan farm.

No…Skrili’s mind prayed.

“No…” she mumbled.

She couldn’t breathe.

“AKRI, PLEASE—“

“He’s always wanted to be just like you,” came Mamma’s voice. It sounded incredibly distant, and yet, she was right behind her.

Skrili whirled around in a panic to face her Mamma.

“Mamma! You don’t understand—he’s in danger! You don’t understand where he—”

“I’ve always suspected what you’ve had to do to keep us alive,” said Mamma. “And a life like that simply does not come consequence-free.”

Skrili couldn’t find words.

“And still, what other option is there for people like us?” Mamma continued. Her eyes fell to her hand, which concealed something. “Our tradition calls for this gift to be passed down from a Shfi mother to her daughter, once she is of adult age. But even as I can acknowledge, some traditions need bending. I am not your mother, and you are a year away from adulthood. But times are pressings, so I bestow this to you now.”

Her palm opened to reveal what appeared to be a simple black hair tie. But Skrili knew what it truly was.

Mamma stepped closer to her as hastily as her frail frame could allow, and placed it into Skrili’s hand. Her purple eyes met Skrili’s intensely.

“Now, go save our Akri, Skrili.”

Skrili’s eyes couldn’t leave her Mamma. Hands shaking, she tugged out the frayed fabric holding her midnight blue hair up, and used her new gift to tie it back in place.

Her anxious heartbeat fused with a passion-fueled adrenaline.

“I will,” she promised.

Skrili turned from her Mamma, and dashed away along the omniflower path.

~

The sky brightened faster today. With no clouds or fog, she and her surroundings would be completely visible this time.

Skrili neared the massive fence, where the omniflowers stopped. The hole from the landowner’s blast was still there. She could only hope Akri hadn’t gone all the way inside.

But then she heard the scream.

Skrili dove through the hole, straight into the farm. She didn’t have to run long before she spotted five bulky men in the field. They huddled over Akri’s small frame, who lie in the grass with his hands to his knees.

Skrili’s speed increased.

“AKRI!”

The men all turned towards her. Somehow, they appeared even more monstrous now that they faced her directly. Despite her motivation, their size stopped her in her tracks a pace away.

Their clothing was without tear or fraying, despite the dirty work their job entailed. All of their bearded, groomed faces were healthy and unblemished. She couldn’t determine their ages—they were all much larger than even the toughest Shfi men in every way. They towered over Skrili’s stature like gods.

They were everything she wasn’t.

One of them was the landowner. She’d never seen his face clearly until now, but she knew by the metallic weapon he slung over his burly shoulder. His brown beard accentuated his frown as his hairy hand tapped the trigger on his gun.

Akri trembled violently beneath the man’s enormous boot, his face buried in his knees.

“This is what you get for sending little boys to do your thieving!” the landowner growled.

“N—no! Don’t hurt him!” Skrili pleaded.

“Do you know how many problems this kid has been causing us for months, stupid Shfi?!” roared the landlord.

Finally, Akri lifted his head cautiously. Tears covered his cheeks. “Skrili…” he whimpered.

“Akri! Don’t move, okay? Everything’s gonna be okay,” Skrili swore tenderly.

“Quite the claim,” chuckled one of the men.

“It wasn’t him! He’s only five, please let him go!” cried Skrili. “It was me! I’ve been stealing from your farm! He had no idea!”

The landowner nodded slowly, but repetitively. The longer he continued, the more Skrili felt a shiver in her bones. He cocked his head to his sons.

“What do you think, boys?”

The shortest of them puffed air out of his nose. “They always said a Shfi girl’s face is prettiest when she’s crying.”

“Heh. I’d like to see it,” said another, and the third cracked his knuckles.

The landowner’s cold, dark eyes fell on her once more. No emotion. No contemplation.

She wasn’t human to him.

“Interesting. I wanna see if that’s true,” he uttered. “Watch closely. And make sure when we’re done, you go tell all your dirty Shfi friends what you saw.”

His foot lifted off Akri’s back, and plowed into it with a thud.

Akri screamed again, and devolved into tears.

“Stop!” Skrili begged.

After the men all finished soaking in Skrili’s reaction, the landowner yielded to his sons. One stepped forward, ready to deliver a kick of equal force.

“No, STOP!”

“You should have stopped stealing from us, huh?” the landowner sneered.

“Please don’t! He’s just a little boy! He’s my baby brother!”

“Then we’re doing him a favor. Let him grow up, and he’ll end up just like you.”

The third, largest son stepped forward next while the second was distracted by their exchange.

Everything inside Skrili screamed in protest.

“Don’t you dare touch him again!!” she threatened.

The son’s eyebrow raised at Skrili in apparent disappointment. “She’s not crying yet? That sucks. I guess we’ll have to try harder.”

His fists clenched hard as he looked down at his tiny, feeble prey.

“Shfi swine,” he muttered.

He pulled back his fist.

Without the slightest hint of a second thought, Skrili reached into her hair and ripped out her black hair tie. She pulled it back as far as her arms would allow, and with one closed eye, aimed squarely at the man.

It whipped forward, cutting through the air both gracefully and violently.

She’d only practiced this a few times with Mamma’s tie months ago. But that training, and her resolve, was all she needed now.

It sliced clean through the son’s wrist, completely severing his hand. When he punched forward, he found nothing but a stub spouting blood everywhere.

He howled endlessly and toppled to his knees, cradling his messy wound.

Skrili’s straight hair fell around her face gracefully. She glared at the rest of the men with hate in her gaze, and leaned forward.

Now, there was no turning back.

Before giving the other men a chance to fully comprehend what just happened, Skrili launched forward at them. Surprise was her only window of success.

The landowner’s hand gripped his weapon tighter, about to lift it off his shoulder.

Him first, she decided.

Skrili came to him like a gust, and jumped forward full-force. Her knee plowed into his ribcage.

While the landowner collapsed in a heap of pain, Skrili turned to the remaining three brothers. By now they’d finally abandoned Akri, horror and rage on their faces, and turned to chase her.

But though they were big and strong, they were slow.

Skrili targeted the nearest one and met him midway. She jumped straight up, and with a twirl, whacked him in the temple with her heel. She ran underneath him before he collapsed and charged at the next son.

Planning another kick, Skrili launched up at him.

But a force like a hundred men plowed into her and she slammed against the ground, her shoulder twisted out of place. She struggled to get to her knees, but a heavy boot kicked her hip and she fell back over. The two men stood over her, their faces hot red.

Though they were slow, they outnumbered her.

“Skrili!” Akri cried.

Through the burly legs, she could see his wide purple eyes watching the beating unfold.

She couldn’t let him see her like this.

Skrili grasped her shoulder and shoved it, popping it back into place. Her body sparked with Power Rebound energy.

“It’s over now, you little demon,” one son growled.

“Oh, you’re in for it, now.”

Grunting, Skrili pounced at the nearest son. But despite her heightened strength, he simply caught her by the arms and held her in place. In his massive hands, she felt as small as the rat she’d trapped and killed on this farm yesterday.

He lifted her up effortlessly. All she could do was twist and kick the air.

“Go back to Hell,” he said.

He took a huge step, raised Skrili higher, and then bashed her against the ground as hard as he could.

All the air left Skrili’s lungs. She lay unable to move, her vision blackening.

“Ah…there it is,” she heard above her.

Skrili’s breath came back in a sudden gasp, which immediately morphed into a shaky sob.

“I guess it’s true. So pretty,” the son said. “Probably because you’re meant for nothing else. Just pain.”

Her vision recovered just in time. With a desperate shout, Skrili rolled out of the way of another stomping boot. She stumbled as far away as possible, and forced herself to her feet.

Both brothers walked towards her slowly. The one she’d kicked to the ground stood, shaking his head, and joined them with cracking knuckles.

Skrili’s Power Rebound ascended even higher. But if they could stop her last attempt so easily, she knew this still wouldn’t be enough strength.

She glanced at Akri, whose eyes followed her every motion unblinkingly.

She needed more power.

Skrili brought her arm to her face and sunk her teeth in as hard as possible, screaming breathily from the self-inflicted pain. The sons paused in confusion. After she could taste blood, she released her arm. A red streak dripped steadily into the perfect grass.

It was a disgraceful technique amongst Shfi Power Rebounds. But it flooded her with more energy, and that was all she cared about.

The men all grimaced in disgust.

“You’re a freak—a monster,” the largest one said.

“They all are,” added his brother.

“Not all of us,” Skrili denied gaspingly, a drop of blood falling from her lip. “But…I am.”

She ran at them again, even faster than before. But all three men stood shoulder to shoulder. They knew what to expect now, and speed had no advantage anymore. Her Power Rebound was her only hope.

She punched at the middle son’s chest, but the other two pressed into her before she could make contact. She struggled with all of their hefty arms, but even still, this power up simply wasn’t enough. Within moments she lost footing, and then they shoved her back to the ground.

“NO!” screamed Akri.

The beating was merciless. She was pinned, her face pressed into the grass. Boots and fists destroyed her body one by one.

“Sis, get up! You’re the strongest! Get up, Skrili!”

Finally, she was convinced it would never stop. Was this retribution? Was this punishment for everything she’d taken from others to sustain her broken family?

She couldn’t help but reach her conclusion: this was penance for trying to accomplish something she could never really do: replace her parents. When they left, she thought, that should have been it. She, Akri, and Mamma were destined to starve and fade away, leaving nobody to grieve them.

Why did she think it could be different?

This must have been punishment for believing her own lie, and for not accepting her circumstance.

This was punishment for her existence.

No longer able to move, and quickly losing the capacity to think, Skrili accepted the Arnlekans’ beating without resistance.

A boot bashed her head countless times. She never learned how long it went on for, because suddenly, her consciousness blackened to nothing.

~

Silence.

Skrili’s eyes opened slowly. Everything hurt. All she could see was the dirt ground against her face. The air was cold and dark.

I’m dead, she decided. This is Hell.

She didn’t want to move. Instead, she waited, hoped, for her consciousness to fail again. But for some reason, it didn’t.

For some reason, she tried to get up.

Akri…she remembered. AKRI!!

Skrili coughed up dirt and tasted a hint of blood. Gasping, she clung to the ground and shoved herself to her hands and knees, her limbs shaking and pleading for rest.

It was almost nighttime now. Anything could have happened to her brother between the fight and now. She needed to stand, find him, and get him as far away from the Arnlekans as possible. It wasn’t too late yet—it couldn’t be.

She shifted to push herself up, relying entirely on Power Rebound energy as it began flowing through her body freely. Finally, her vision improved.

And in that moment, she saw Akri’s body.

He lay completely still on his back, directly beside her. His empty eyes were open, and his skin was gray.

Akri’s entire stomach, and the bottom of his ribs, were completely missing. There was a gaping, cauterized hole through the center of his body, and Skrili could see the ground through it. Flies and insects were already gathering.

She’d seen death before many times. Shfi starved along the dirt roads every day, and gangs left broken bodies out in the open regularly.

But if she had anything in her stomach, she would have lost it.

Her baby brother was gone.

The landowner didn’t have to shoot him. He just wanted to.

Despite her rapidly intensifying Power Rebound, Skrili no longer felt anything. She ignored the purple light beginning to illuminate from her body. She just crawled helplessly to Akri, and cradled his destroyed body in her arms. She made no sound, and she shed no tears.

There was nothing to live for anymore.

This was where she, too, would die.

Then someone let out of shout of pure horror. Skrili looked up, a purple hue coloring everything around her.

The Arnlekan fence was only steps away—the men had simply discarded them like feces just outside their property. Through the fence a guard stood within the field staring back at Skrili.

He dropped his electric rod and ran away, almost stumbling over himself.

“A GHOST!!! A GHOST!!!!” he screamed.

Only moments later, the landowner came booming out of the barn, his trusty murder weapon in hand.

“Come on!! What the heck am I even paying you for?!” he shouted.

But the guard continued fleeing.

The landowner laid eyes on the source of his terror. Then, he froze. Skrili and the landowner watched each other in total silence, the sky darkening above.

“You…you freak…” the landowner uttered. “You should be dead. What is this?”

Skrili said nothing.

The landowner cursed. “I knew I should have shot you too, while I was at it.”

He took Akri from me, Skrili thought emptily.

That was all she needed: the realization, and the intent. Physical effort was nonexistent. Time and space were irrelevant.

Before the landowner could blink, Skrili was face-to-face with him inside the farm. Her hand was straight through his chest.

His shocked face was bright and clear under Skrili’s glowing purple energy. When she tore her arm out of his body, her face expressionless, he dropped dead into his perfect grass.

Skrili’s heart stung. Now, she had become everything Mamma raised her not to be.

It hurt so much.

Skrili’s feet left the ground, and she floated above the dead landowner.

“Dad…”

Skrili’s luminous purple eyes turned. One of the sons had exited the nearby house on the property and stared at her from the porch, his eyes wide.

“You really are…” he murmured. “It’s true…you really are a demon…”

He hurriedly reached for something behind him, and tugged up a smaller, but similar weapon to the one the landowner used.

Skrili glanced at the dead landowner, and Akri’s body stabbed into her thoughts. She hated everything. She hated herself.

She turned and faced the son’s weapon fully, dropping her guard.

This, Skrili decided. Now, I can die.

For a moment, the pain dampened.

Shouting, the man pulled the trigger and a burning wave of yellow light raced towards her. His aim was perfect.

But once the blast reach Skrili’s radiance of light, it ricocheted off and darted backwards, colliding with the son. He fell with a scream, and rolled against the porch, writhing as smoke rose from his body.

Skrili felt stuck in time for an instant. She watched on in hopeless awe.

A tear fell. Then another. Everything welled up: the loss, the rage, the emptiness…nothing made sense anymore.

She screamed.

In a fit of tears, Skrili flashed back to the landowner’s body. She lifted his bulky metallic weapon with only a few fingers. It was weightless in her grasp.

Then she screamed again, and threw the weapon at the house.

The explosion left nothing behind but flames and rubble. The massive, crackling fire lit the sky all around the farm.

Skrili floated there, and watched the fire until night fell.

Then, empty, she let her feet touch the ground and walked away.

She didn’t know where she was going, or why. Little made sense before today, but without Akri, none of it did.

Her foot stepped on some sort of small fabric.

Skrili looked to find her Shfi hair tie. She brought the gift into her hands—the weapon Mamma had entrusted her with to protect Akri.

It was all she had left now: the symbol of her failure.

Skrili lifted it and tied her hair up.

As she finished the process, she heard feet trotting in the grass towards her. Skrili noticed the farm dog scurrying her way nervously, whimpering as he neared her.

Startled by all the fire and violence, he stopped and gazed up at her—his little friend—relieved to have tracked her down. His tail wagged lightly.

Skrili sniffed, her tears obstructing her vision. She shook her head.

“No,” she uttered chokingly. “Stay.”

Skrili averted her gaze, and turned to leave the farm behind forever.

~

Deon listened silently. The entire forest was in a hush, as if to give Skrili a platform to speak. She stared ahead, her eyes just as void and hopeless as they must have been when this all happened.

“I never spoke to my Mamma again,” Skrili uttered.

Deon’s chest twisted.

“So…that’s when you ran away?” he asked, the first time he’d spoken since her story began.

Skrili shook her head once. “For weeks, I scrounged up whatever food I could find, and left it at my Mamma’s tent before she could see me. I just…couldn’t face her again,” she explained. “Eventually she passed away in her sleep. She was already declining, but I think after that day…the grief…and the loneliness…”

Her voice choked.

“She was holding the photo of me and Akri when I found her,” Skrili’s voice shook out. “We’d taken it with an Arnlekan camera I found near a dumpster, and we were gonna take one of her, too, but it broke.”

Skrili’s mouth quivered.

“Sometimes, it’s hard to remember her face…” she whimpered.

Finally, Skrili couldn’t hold it back anymore. Tears burst out all at once. She tried to hide her face from Deon.

“They’re gone because of me,” she mumbled between sobs. “They’re gone. And now you know how much of a monster…and a failure I really am…”

Deon felt a tear down his own cheek.

What? he thought.

“I…I’m not who you thought…I shouldn’t have hid that from you…” Skrili muttered. “I think I just…I just wanted…”

Deon leaned close to her, and embraced her in a hug. He didn’t think about it. It wasn’t a decision, or stem from his loss for words. It was an impulse.

“I’m sorry,” Deon whispered, his own tears falling. He regretted his inability to find anything else to say. He could barely grasp the sheer depth of her grief and pain. As much as he wanted to fix her suffering or cheer her up, like he used to for Lammy on late nights like these, he realized this was a wound much deeper—something she had to accept.

Something he had to accept.

Skrili’s fears are yours now, Skip had told him.

Deon knew that meant her pain was his now, too. Being a team meant more than he’d ever realized.

He had no idea how late it was at this point. He just held Skrili tighter as her shaking sobs continued.

Finally accepting his embrace, Skrili let herself lean against him. Her tears soaked his tunic, while his fell into her hair.

“I don’t want anyone else to know what this feels like,” Skrili whispered.

Deon knew exactly why she said that. The vision, he thought.

It only felt more real to him now. Though he had no reason to believe Lammy was in any danger all the way back in Tailpiece, it lingered over them like an omen. Clearly, they shared the same exact vision for a reason.

He could only hope it would never find them in reality.

But for now, Skrili was the one hurting. All he knew to do was be there with her in the quiet. The Nightwood branches softened even further around them, and as the night passed on, Deon didn’t let her go.