Became an Observer in Love Company

[I am currently sending the observation records up until now.]

I quietly gazed at the message that popped up.

In the dark room, the light emanating from the computer was the only source brightening the space.

I sat still and blankly stared at the screen.

The email window remained open.

My hands hovered over the keyboard.

And hesitated.

I don’t know how many times I composed sentences just to delete them.

[What is this so-called “singularity”?]

Tap. Tap. Tap. The characters were erased.

[Am I allowed to alter the original story?]

Tap. Tap. Tap. The words disappeared once more.

[Am I allowed to stop being an observer?]

Tap. Tap. Tap.

In the end, I couldn’t type anything.

I couldn’t send any emails. As always, I ended up sending only the observation records.

I stared endlessly at the computer screen.

The automatic shutdown dimmed the screen, darkening the room further.

A profound silence. The ticking of the clock echoed even louder.

I leaned back in my chair, resting my forehead in my palm.

“I don’t want to become a butterfly.”

Even a small flap of a butterfly’s wings can create a storm.

Maybe the distortion began the moment I got immersed in this world.

All I could do now was hope that the distortion wouldn’t grow too large.

If I were to return eventually, if I were someone who must depart, I didn’t want to leave much of a trace.

I didn’t know it would be this hard to simply watch on.

Meanwhile, my phone alarm chirped.

Pretending I wasn’t expecting it, I picked up my phone.

It was an ordinary advertisement text.

Well, it’s expected. There’s no one who would send me messages.

Either advertisements or Lee Jian.

Chat logs with Lee Jian were displayed on screen.

There were a lot.

The endless scroll revealed our numerous exchanges.

[Lee Jian]

➜ What are you doing? (An emoji of a duck lifting her glasses)

I had unknowingly waited for this recurring message.

I was aware.

If this “singularity” was a warning not to tamper with the original story, then it would be wise not to get too entangled with her.

Still—

Taptaptap. I quietly typed a response and stared at it.

[Are you okay?]

[You seemed unwell today.]

It wasn’t a long message.

But I couldn’t send it.

I just sat there staring at the short sentence that wouldn’t leave.

My finger fumbled at the button, unable to hit send.

[] Chiming sound.

Startled, I pressed the button at the sudden noise in the air.

It sounded similar to the system’s notification tone, but there was nothing to see in the empty space.

“Oh.”

As soon as I sent the message, the “read” confirmation popped up.

It was as if someone was watching our exchanged messages.

[Lee Jian]

➜ What are you doing? (An emoji of a duck lifting her glasses)

[Kim Dohyun]

➜ Are you okay?

Two messages appeared simultaneously.

I couldn’t help but laugh.

[Lee Jian]

➜ I should just rest.

➜ I told you I’m fine, but Yoon Jihoo made a fuss about it for no reason.

Is she still with Yoon Jihoo now?

Of course, it’s only natural.

It grew harder to send messages as I quietly turned away.

I lacked the courage, any reason to ask further.

However—

Drip. Drop.

Raindrops fell one by one through the window.

➜ Do you have an umbrella?

[Lee Jian]

➜ Is it raining outside?

➜ This is bad. I don’t have an umbrella.

[The main episode has been detected. You will be guided to the location.]

…

…

…

With an umbrella in hand, I stepped outside.

The drizzle began to intensify.

My steps toward the academy quickened.

And finally, I reached the entrance.

[Observer mode is now active. The view is locked.]

The erratic shifting of vision.

Yoon Jihoo and Park Nayul walked away under the umbrella.

And Lee Jian, standing there watching them.

She remained alone, looking after them.

Her raised hand slowly fell limply down.

[Observer mode has been terminated.]

And I, witnessed this scene directly with my own eyes.

But unlike before, I couldn’t see anything.

It wasn’t due to the rain obscuring my view.

I didn’t even know what emotions I was feeling right now.

Even my own emotions were enshrouded in question marks.

But then—

The scene from the original work surfaced in my mind.

At the academy entrance on a rainy night.

Under the dim light, Lee Jian, left alone.

After Yoon Jihoo and Park Nayul departed, she stood blankly in the rain.

What was Lee Jian thinking at this moment in the original?

“‘I’m fine. I’ve always been okay on my own, so it’ll be fine.’”

That’s how she tried to convince herself.

She said that, trying hard not to cry, to believe that she wasn’t weak.

But in the original story, Lee Jian eventually broke down that night.

On her solitary way home, unseen by anyone.

In a place where no one would hear, she cried in secret.

“Ah, how funny. Yoon Jihoo is actually pretty cool. He’s even sharing an umbrella with the senior.”

“It’s fine. I’ve always managed alone… It was supposed to end up this way.”

“It’s nothing major. He just overreacted. It’s just going back to the way things were.”

“But why does it hurt so much?”

I only knew this scene as mere text.

But now, here in reality—

She was still alone.

Under the rain, without an umbrella.

A scene included to highlight the blossoming affection between the two.

Behind the sweetness, a bittersweet taste. After the bittersweet, sweetness. Ultimately, a love that merely accentuates the love of others.

I’m someone who should follow the original story.

That’s the safest route.

So, I should just keep watching.

Yet why…

Why does this scene make me so uncomfortable right now?

Was I drawn here by the system message? Or by Lee Jian’s message?

I didn’t know.

The rain scattered everything around.

Even the name of my emotion became blurred.

*

The health room was quiet.

A gentle breeze passed by the window, but the outside noise was faint.

The thin curtain swayed slightly, and I was alone in this space.

I lay down and stared at the ceiling.

Blankly, without any thought.

The sensation of the melting ice pack on my forehead.

Time, I, were all slowly sinking.

“……”

The quiet sound of breathing disturbed the air.

A profound silence with no other sounds.

I picked up my phone out of habit.

I opened the chat room.

After that day’s conversation, I frequently entered this chat.

[Kim Dohyun]

His name caught my eye.

My fingertips hesitated momentarily.

Should I send it? Should I not?

What could he be doing right now?

He’s not likely to be busy at this hour.

[What are you doing?]

I typed it slowly.

As usual, with a familiar emoji.

But it wasn’t sent out.

Suddenly, chiming.

“……!”

My finger slipped.

Tap.

The message has been sent.

And…

Read.

At the same time, in the same moment.

Both he and I simultaneously sent messages.

I stared blankly at my phone for a moment.

“What is this?”

I couldn’t help but laugh.

“So, you were worried too, huh?”

I murmured softly to myself.

Then, I should reply, shouldn’t I?

I slowly moved my fingers.

[You should just rest. You said you were fine, but Yoon Jihoo made a fuss over nothing.]

Pretending not to care, acting nonchalant.

After sending it, silence flowed again.

Will he reply?

Or will he end the conversation with this?

I flipped my phone over.

It was annoyingly nerve-wracking.

I slowly closed my eyes.

…Then, the alert chimed again.

Chiming.

I sprang up like a spring and picked up my phone.

[Kim Dohyun]

➜ Do you have an umbrella?

“…Huh?”

What does he mean by that?

I didn’t understand at first.

Is it… raining?

[Lee Jian]

➜ Is it raining outside?

I hesitated a bit before entering the reply.

[Huh, that’s bad. I don’t have an umbrella.]

Yoon Jihoo had gone back earlier. I sent him off, though he insisted on staying longer.

A bit of alone time seemed necessary.

I needed to sort out my thoughts.

I crouched with my knees drawn up.

“I should have told him to bring me one.”

I looked out the window.

The overcast sky.

Raindrops trickling down the window, blurring the view outside.

I already knew Kim Dohyun was avoiding me.

Even though I have no intention of keeping my distance from Kim Dohyun.

When did this distance between us start growing?

I quietly stood up and walked towards the glass window.

I raised my hand and gently wiped the glass.

It was cold. The futile heat trapped inside quietly subsided.

The raindrops that seeped through gently slid down my skin.

I let it be at first.

After all, everyone needs their alone time sometime.

Even if it seemed like he was avoiding me when I approached, I thought it was just a coincidence.

‘It couldn’t be, right?’

I thought like that and didn’t give it much thought.

But if it was just for a day or two, I might have considered it coincidental.

Days turned into weeks without any change.

It was during lunchtime that I first noticed something unusual.

I saw Kim Dohyun sitting alone on the playing field and walked toward him as usual.

The moment I spotted him from afar, my mind was already bracing for a playful banter—

“Why aren’t you sharing lunch with me?”

“Hey, Kim Dohyun!”

I thought he would turn around like normal.

However, he flinched.

And then casually got up to walk away in the opposite direction.

…What is it?

I stopped in my tracks for a moment.

‘Did I see wrong?’

Maybe it was just a coincidence. It could have been.

Yeah, it was just a coincidence.

The next incident happened in the corridor.

I encountered Kim Dohyun at the end of the hallway.

We usually would make slight eye contact and pass by silently if we didn’t have anything to say.

But this time, he pulled out his phone the moment he saw me.

“…”

Even from a distance, I could tell.

He’s pretending to look at his phone while walking in the opposite direction.

I opened my mouth to call out.

If I spoke, he would stop. Then maybe I could banter with him lightly.

But then at that moment—

Something in my chest felt soggy, as if raindrops were slowly seeping through my collar.

It was at that moment I faintly realized—

This wasn’t a coincidence.

The third incident happened in front of the club room.

I was going there to collect some necessary equipment.

I met Kim Dohyun at the door.

“Huh? Are you also here to collect equipment—”

“Ah, I’ll go ahead.”

Before I could finish my sentence, he quickly stepped aside.

Saying that, he walked away before I could react.

He even made it look like he was just originally heading somewhere else naturally, without any hesitation.

But I could feel it even in that short moment.

He’s avoiding spending time with me.

“…What is this?”

Could I still call this a coincidence?

By this point, a dampness was gradually creeping into the depths of my heart.

Like raindrops falling one at a time, I hadn’t noticed the ground beneath me was already wet.

As more days piled up, moments that seemed coincidental continued for a week, and then longer.

And then I realized I couldn’t dismiss it as ‘it could happen’ anymore.

That’s when I understood.

Kim Dohyun wasn’t just moving away from me.

He was deliberately pushing me away.

Like rain drops soaking through, unnoticeably but surely.

And so, I realized the distance between me and Kim Dohyun was gradually becoming damp.

He would occasionally lose himself in thought, gazing at something.

And where his gaze rested was inevitably Yoon Jihoo and Nayul Senior.

He couldn’t tear his eyes away and could only stare blankly.

His faint sigh followed.

I faintly recognized the emotions stirring within him.

Still, I thought I could adjust to it, that I could pretend to be unaffected.

Yet, today, seeing him again avoiding me—

“It’s fine. It was nothing significant anyway.”

I was staring at the ceiling.

Why do I feel so strange?

Kim Dohyun avoiding me,

Seeing him conversing amiably with Nayul Senior,

Shouldn’t they be none of my business?

But—

Why does it feel so uncomfortable?

As I close my eyes, everything comes back to my mind.

Kim Dohyun avoiding me.

Kim Dohyun talking with Nayul Senior.

The diverse expressions he showed me today, unlike usual.

‘It’s fine. I’ve always been okay on my own.’

I convinced myself.

“Let’s go back.”

Approaching the academy entrance, I saw the heavy rain.

“Oh, that’s right.”

‘It was supposed to rain today.’

I noticed Yoon Jihoo passing by with an umbrella.

Just as I was about to call out, I noticed someone beside him.

Nayul Senior with her black hair and crimson eyes.

I slowly lowered my hand that was about to wave.

The rough rain.

The view ahead blurred.

This wasn’t just from the raindrops; it might be because my emotions were also pouring down.

What’s falling from the sky is rain, but what’s landing in my heart, what should I call that?

In the heavy downpour where I can’t see a foot in front of me, what am I looking at right now?

In the dark clouds across the sky, someone’s face appears amidst the shades of gray.

‘Good thing Kim Dohyun didn’t see this scene.’

It’s something he probably shouldn’t see if I don’t want to draw attention.

His love seems to be a painful, unrequited one.

Strange. Thinking of him intensified the throbbing in my chest.

“Why are you avoiding me? If I did something wrong, just tell me. You idiot.”

I don’t even know if this emotion is love, attachment, or simply an obsession.

But still… here I am standing.

Can’t help it. I should just run forward.

Won’t the rain make me think more clearly? Perhaps it will cool the residual embers in my chest and put them to rest.

The remaining embers in my heart spewed out ugly feelings.

“Envious. Popular too much.”

“Isn’t that the same for you?”

I turned my head at the sound.

Kim Dohyun was standing there.

At the sight of him, tears welled up involuntarily.

“What is it? Any problems? Is your head still hurting?”

He took a step closer to me, his hand reaching towards my forehead.

I instinctively took a step back.

His movement froze mid-air.

“No, I’m fine.”

He cautiously took another step forward.

I caught a glimpse to the side and saw Yoon Jihoo and Nayul Senior.

And Kim Dohyun, he saw it too.

No.

Look away.

You shouldn’t see this scene.

Unconsciously, I was blocking him.

Blocking him from seeing.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing…”

He took another step forward and gently stood before me again.

“What is it?”

Kim Dohyun took another step forward. The moment I thought he might turn his head, my heart plummeted.

I couldn’t predict what expression he would have on his face.

What if… what if I see the feeling I’m imagining in his face the moment he looks at Nayul Senior?

I didn’t want to witness that.

I raised my hand to block his eyes.

“Please don’t look…”

I bit my lips.

Perhaps this is just an illusion.

Still—

“Please look away.”

My voice came out lower than usual, calm as if trying to hide the emotions.

But it was too late.

The moment those words left my mouth, something stirred fiercely in my chest.

“Why?”

Kim Dohyun asked.

My heart raced faster and faster.

‘What if you get hurt?’

‘I don’t want to see you wear that expression.’

Emotions wavered gradually, my voice trembling as it escaped.

“Please… don’t look.”

My lips felt dry.

I couldn’t predict what kind of expression Kim Dohyun would have on his face if he looks at Nayul Senior.

Thus, I fear it.

Seeing his expression will make everything become clear.

It feels that our relationship would change as well.

I didn’t want to see what kind of expression he would have.

That’s why I’m stopping him like this.

Like a child who believes that closing eyes will make the reality disappear.

Am I running away right now?

I stopped Kim Dohyun in front of me but couldn’t help but look up at him.

Kim Dohyun looked at me.

The moment I met his gaze, something in my chest churned oddly.

This shouldn’t happen. It’s meaningless.

But one thing is certain…

My heart is aching so much.

“Please… please don’t look.”

The voice that escaped was shakier than I expected.

My eyes prickled, but it wasn’t enough to warrant wiping them with the back of my hand.

Grimly, I swallowed the emotions.

I thought I shouldn’t let him know.

‘I’m being so selfish.’

For a moment, silence reigned.

Only the sound of rain hit the air.

The rains grew fiercer, water droplets splashing as they hit the ground.

All seemed to be washed away, fading into vagueness, except for my emotions.

They became more distinct.

The pain grew fiercer. The heavy rain pelted my heart like lashes.

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