Ash and Honey [BL]

That night, when all was quiet in his tea house pavilion, Fu Ran startled with the shake of a dream. He fell into the throes of a new experience, one that shook him to his core.

Unlike the dreams of previous years, which all showed a tyrant emperor acting upon his whims and demands with an iron fist, last night was different. This time, he dreamed of Tian Han.

Even if it did not sound like much, that was a stark difference because the fear was closer than it had ever been before. The fear was in the now, not an indescribably distant future.

Fu Ran lowered his face deeper into the warm bathwater and let bubbles escape his lips in a frustrated breath. The koi fish statue on the opposite side of the bath spit out water with a calming splash, and the little ripples pushed pink and purple flowers all the way to where he sat.

He had been like this, pensive, for a few hours now. It was already morning, yet he couldn't get it off his mind.

He didn't like it.

The dream was only a singular scene, but it was so vivid he could feel it. He lay in a grave, dug six feet down, dressed in pristine white mourning robes. Even his own appearance was starkly different. His skin was ghastly, decorated with bruises he didn't remember having.

His arms were crossed over his chest, and beneath his palms rested a white mask. The only semblance of color, aside from the brown dirt and the inky blackness of his scattered hair, was the stark red of maple leaves dotting the inside of the grave.

Fu Ran shuddered at the thought of last night's vision. While he was being buried under pounds of dirt, above him stood the Tyrant Emperor. No, that was a bit wrong. Above him stood Tian Han, against a vast backdrop of red maple leaves.

He thought he'd finally found safety, having made a firm decision that the Tyrant Emperor did not yet exist. But now his dreams were implicating the present, and he didn't know how to process the new information.

Fu Ran hadn't so much as touched Shi Wei Ji when he woke up this morning. He didn't want to whisper more curses to his closest companion.

For now, he simply tried to enjoy the outdoor bath.

And he allowed himself that much.

***

Once dried off and dressed, he headed through his tea house pavilion to the garden door.

Tian Han and Wan Yu were already sitting at the tea table when Fu Ran stepped outside. Not wanting to bear the weight of interrupting, he watched quietly from the steps.

Wan Yu nearly fumbled his steamed bun when Tian Han palmed the top of his head and ruffled his hair. He fought back in the only way he knew how, by putting down his breakfast and fixing his bangs one strand at a time.

Tian Han chuckled and asked, "Are you excited? It's been a whole year."

"I am not. But Gege seems to be. He won't leave me alone."

The boy was so cool and collected at any time of the day, but the sight of him pouting nearly made Fu Ran snicker. He tried to hold it back, but the two turned their heads in unison toward Xingti Pavilion.

They chimed together, "Good morning, Shizun."

Fu Ran's joyous mood was gone in an instant, as only one of those greetings sounded proper from the lips of its speaker. He grimaced and shot a glare at the Tyrant Emperor, but he held his tongue.

Within the next half-hour, the other two had arrived.

Meng Xiao and Lin An arrived with several bags of personal belongings, maybe a little too much for their very first mission, but Fu Ran wasn't going to chastise them. Instead, they could learn the hard way that carrying that many supplies eventually became tiresome.

Meng Xiao huffed, shifting the weight of his bags. "Aren't we supposed to fly on our swords?"

Fu Ran barely spared him a glance. "Can you?"

The boy faltered, tightening his grip on the straps. "Well—"

"Normally, yes." Fu Ran adjusted the bag on his back, his steps measured as he descended. "But before you learn to fly, it's wise to know where you're allowed to."

Meng Xiao groaned dramatically and quickened his pace, stepping ahead of the group. "So you won't teach us because…?"

"Because I don't see the need." Fu Ran kept his voice even. "We haven't had a mission until now, and the first place we're going is Bei Zangli. Small city, mostly elderly. If a bunch of loud, reckless children came flying in—"

Meng Xiao barked a laugh. "You don't want them keeling over in fright?"

Fu Ran sighed through his nose, but before he could respond, Lin An scowled. "That's not funny."

Meng Xiao only shrugged. "Fine. Then I'll change my reasoning. Shizun hasn't taught us yet because you'll fall off and die."

Lin An faltered mid-step. She turned, affronted. "I wouldn't fall off." But her voice lacked confidence now. The excitement that had lit up her face earlier was gone.

Meng Xiao, satisfied, grinned like he had just won some great battle.

The group continued down the steps, their pace steady. The pink petals that lined the mountainside swayed gently, some drifting down to land on Lin An's shoulder. She didn't seem to notice.

Then, suddenly, she slowed her steps.

"Shizun," she whispered, barely more than a breath. "It's not true. I have more ability than that."

Fu Ran halted. She wasn't looking at him—her hands curled tight around the straps of her belongings, knuckles white.

"I promise I'm not a disappointment," she added quickly.

She was already trying to atone for a mistake she hadn't even made.

Fu Ran exhaled and softened his stance. "Even if you do make mistakes, it's all right. I fell off a few times."

Lin An's head snapped up, blinking at him. "Really?"

He nodded once. That was all the reassurance she needed—she wiped at her face, though the red still lingered beneath her eyes.

Though Meng Xiao still looked smug, Lin An regained some of her prior vigor.

Fu Ran shook his head and pressed forward. So this is life for a little while, he thought.

It had been a while since he had dealt with young children. Previously, the disciples he took were mostly fifteen and up, as he wasn't particularly good with a young mentality. He preferred working with teenagers who already had their heads on their shoulders.

Alas, he did not get the luxury of choice. Most of the remaining children, after the events of the bloody entrance exam, were all quite young. Since they were all to be taken under the sect, even the youngest, Wan Yu, was not turned away.

From the gates of the mountain sect, the stairs looked endless. In truth, there were at least a thousand. He did not remember the exact number, despite the fact that he had counted them once when he was a young disciple.

The view, however, was staggering. Bright pink trees covered the entire mountainside, making it seem as though they were walking down into a sea of spring. These colors would be gone in the next few months, but for now, he relished them. A beautiful sway of bright, colorful hues landed in piles on the steps.

After about half an hour of walking, Fu Ran was hit with a crippling realization. He was not nearly as fit as he thought he was. The years of solitude had done a number on him, and going down this many steps was tiresome.

Luckily, a carriage driver awaited his arrival, along with supplies packed onto the back of the cart and a beautiful white horse attached to the front.

The carriage had a certain touch of elegance. It was mostly black with gold decorations, a lotus symbol plastered on the side. Fu Ran blinked a few times.

The only one available must have been this one, as this was one of Yi Yang's personal carriages.

Fu Ran ducked under the carriage overhang and opened the door. The children were busy packing bags onto the horses, but he and Tian Han stepped inside. He gave a simple wave of his hand to the driver, and the carriage began to move.

Fully prepared to spend the next few hours in silence, Fu Ran pressed his face against the window and tried to get comfortable.

Perhaps it would have been more accurate to say that Fu Ran simply did not want to look at the man accompanying him. At the same time, he could not shake the feeling of a piercing gaze on his neck.

He swallowed.

The air inside the carriage was filled with the sweet fragrance of wisteria blooms, but amidst the perfume, Fu Ran caught a hint of something else. The scent of burning ash.

Whether this scent carried hints of Yi Yang or the Tyrant Emperor, he could not tell. But when he stole a glance at his companion, he startled.

Golden eyes met his as soon as he dared to look.

Tian Han watched him, still as a tiger before the pounce. The Tyrant Emperor covered his mouth with his palm, but his eyes were half-slanted in an indecipherable expression. It stole the heat from Fu Ran's veins. 

Tian Han's eyes widened, and he quickly averted his gaze.

Have I upset him already? Fu Ran's mind raced with confusion and curiosity. What did I do?

What was supposed to be a quick trip in quiet peace, had no doubt just promised to be much longer than he'd hoped.