Chapter 30: Mashiro
"...... Ain't it seems like a week has passed since then in the end."
I vacantly muttered in my room.
Wondering what kind of name would be good for Kuro Chisome, and it has already been a week since I have been thinking about that.
"To think it was this hard to come up with and to name someone......not that I hadn't thought about it, but it's quite a challenge."
It's not the same as giving a name to a character that you have created in your mind or that appears in a novel you write as a hobby.
Kuro Chisome certainly exists there, and even if her origin is different from that of normal humans, she is still a precious sister and family member to me......a half-baked name or rather, if it's not a name that she's happy to receive then it can't go.
"......U~n"
This is bad, I am so distressed about it that I feel like I'm getting an intellectual fever. [Tl note: fever that brings with it an intellectual or psycho-developmental growth spurt.]
Sometimes on impulse, I worry about it at school, and even sometimes Misora calls out to me about it; it's the same with Shinji and Kouki anyway.
Because this is how it's like at school, naturally Chisome and Kuro Chisome asked me about it at home as well.
"At a time like this, if I told them it was nothing, they would get more concerned, and yet, I guess the reason they don’t dare to ask is because they believe in me."
Well, in the first place, sayings like "(I) believe in you" or "(I) don't believe in you" are not exaggerations, but...... when I was thinking like that, the door of the room *ton*ton* was tapped.
"Nii-san can I come in?"
"That's fine~"
The one who entered the room was only Chisome.
Apparently, it seems that Kuro Chisome fell asleep while watching TV in the living room, and she is sleeping looking so comfortably that she is leaving her that way as is.
"You don't have a smartphone at hand, and you're not spreading your study tools either, after all, Nii-san, you have been worrying lately, haven't you."
"That is......"
"I know from Nii-san's appearance and the way you talk that it's not a serious worry, but as Nii-san's younger sister and lover, I'll be worried~?"
"......my bad"
She snuggled up next to me sitting on the bed, put her finger on her mouth, looked at me and said,
"I love you and have been watching you for a long time, that's why the all-understanding me will be making a guess!"
"guess?"
"Un. Judging from the way Nii-san has been acting lately, you've been looking at that girl on impulse, haven't you. That's why perhaps it was something about her?"
"................."
"Silent is affirmation♪ She's sleeping now so it's okay, and yet you can't tell me anything?
"No......"
Even though I thought that would be fine, after all, I probably still had the feeling that I wanted to make it like a surprise......however, when I think about it now, setting the topic of a present (gift) aside, it might have been a mistake in the first place to think about the name for her alone.
"Would you mind giving me a little advice? No, in the first place, Chisome should also have been involved somehow riight......we are lovers and family after all."
"Right Right♪ I'll bestow upon you a consultation!"
While giving a wry smile to her who honoured me well, I immediately moved on to the main topic. [Tl note no 1]
"I was thinking of a name for her."
"A name?"
"Though that girl is also Chisome, but......after all, I do think that while she's the same, she's also a separate existence. That's why I was thinking that I wanted to give a name that represents that girl."
"......a"
"Chisome?"
I thought if I told her that I wanted to give that girl a name, Chisome would be amazed or something, but instead her eyes gradually started to get wet, and even though they weren't that big of drops, tears were dripping down.
I was flustered by the suddenness, but Chisome said don't worry about it and continued.
"Sorry. I was very much moved......umm, that child is a different existence to me, but it's also the same existence. That's why I was so happy with your words of how you thought so much about that girl, and even though I 'm not that girl, I was completely moved see."
"......I see."
I'm glad that it wasn't that her body was hurting anywhere.
I put my hand on Chisome's shoulder and held her close to me, and we stayed silent that way for some time until Chisome calmed down.
When the tears finally stopped, Chisome was back to normal.
"Even so, a name huh... I didn't give any attention to that kind of thing for a long time anyway, and that's why I always called her that girl (child) or you." [Tl note: you, as in Japanese, anata.]
"Riight"
"Un. But...... if I hadn't met Nii-san, and my heart had become hopeless; if so, I'd be afraid that I would have come to surely thought of her like a tool."
"It's okay. Chisome is a kind child, after all――I'll always be by your side. That's why don't think of yourself any differently from who you are now."
"Nii-san......."
I don't have special powers like Chisome, but even so I can assure you that my feelings to protect her is genuine and cannot be denied by anyone.
"If I had to put it in an extreme way, if even supposing that, that world were to bare its fangs and try to turn Chisome back into the original Chisome, your heart I will protect it. Even if the current you were to be stolen from me, I'll definitely get you back without fail――that's why don't worry about anything alright."
"......Nii-san, you're too cool."
"Yeah of course. I'm a cool Onii-chan right?"
"Ehehe, un♪"
I'm not the only one you know, Chisome.
Older brother in the world is about one that can do anything for his cute little sister... even if he can't do it, he wants to do something is all about being an older brother.
"......Somehow see, I feel like I excessively want to kiss Nii-san. And then, we immensely make out and go to sleep in a good mood as it is, kind of feeling."
"I'm happy for that, but let's leave kissing and flirting for later."
"That's right isn't it. Even so, a name huh......"
Then we sat quietly and started thinking about Kuro Chisome.
We spent quite a long time exchanging opinions with each other, but Kuro Chisome seemed to be asleep the whole time, so it seems it'll be okay even if we stay like this for a while longer.
"...... It's different from naming a dog or cat isn't it."
"Yeah I think so. It's hard to name person alright, like seriously."
"Person...... Fufuu♪"
At this rate, it would be quicker for Kuro Chisome to wake up huh, or if she stays asleep, it wouldn't be particularly strange if the dawn comes......Mumumuu, this one's a hard problem, man.
“Incidentally, what did Nii-san call her until now?”
"...... Kuro Chisome"
"Wooh. But that was kind of cool or something I think, maybe." (Chisome)
Come to think of it, was it the first time I told her how I call that girl Kuro Chisome.
Well now, after that, while Chisome and I are thinking long and hard with few words, sometimes Chisome lets out of her mouth the candidate for the name and shakes her head.
"......Chisome......Kuro Chisome......From there black......U~n" (Taiga)
Although Kuro Chisome is a living being within Chisome, she remains independent from Chisome.
Moreover, recently she has been doing her best to generate words, and it feels like a chick trying to fly away.
(That girl certainly has a terrifying power hidden in her, which can easily kill people and is the origin of Chisome's power......But, from my point of view, that child has the impression of being pure ain't it.)
Pure......white kimono? I'm sure that not only Chisome, but that girl would look unbelievably suitable in such clothes I think riight. [Tl note no 2: white kimono.]
That girl lived along with Chisome's pain and despair, but that most likely must have been a pitch-dark world, however, now it's obvious that she's also living in the present, happily, just like Chisome, and she's doing her best to say the words in her lovely voice.
"Though she is an existence that came out of a dark world, but in reality she has the image of a pure child who has not been dyed with any color isn't it."
"Isn't it. The same goes for that child anyway; she's a child who might have been dyed with just my will one way or the other you know." (Chisome)
"Aah......that girl is in a clean state right now. A beautiful clean color that has not been dyed by any color... I did say stained with black blood, but it gives off that pure white feeling isn't it." [Tl note no 3]
"Pure white huh~. Certainly, if you put it that way, it might feel like that."
Not black, but white...... that's also the one with a pure white heart Kuro Chisome...... huhh.
"......Mashiro" (Pure White)
"e?"
"How about Mashiro?"
"Mashiro......Mashiro......Un......Un! I think it's cute! Mashiro......that girl's name is Mashiro huh♪"
Ummm.......it took me a while as it is to think about it, but it came out surprisingly quickly.
Looking at Chisome's reaction, she seems to totally like it anyway, and although it's not finalized yet, the name Mashiro will be what you call a form of "temporary candidate," I think.
She is by no means a black and scary existence, but with the meaning of expressing a white, pure and innocent existence I gave her the name Mashiro but......Un, I'm feeling good about it too.
"......a"
"What's wrong?"
"Um... sorry Nii-san. I was so absorbed in my thoughts that I didn't even notice."
"e?"
Then, Kuro Chisome slimily crawled out from Chisome's shadow.
She wondered why she was left out of the group, and although I could feel that kind of tinged with reproach like will, her miffed expression was very cute, and I said "impression of being pure," but that's without doubt exactly right.
I smile wryly at her figure and beckon her over.
"Come" (Taiga)
"? Un......" (Kuro Chisome)
As she slowly comes closer, I match her eyes.
"Actually... I have been thinking about your name."
"Na......me?"
"That's right. After all, I do think it's really important whether you have a name or not you know. Because a name has a big meaning, and that alone is proof that you exist in that place see."
".......?"
I guess it is a little difficult?
Well, even so, she was reacting to the word "name," anyway, and I do think surely that deep down in her heart, she understood it.
"Nam.....e......scary"
"Scary?"
I and Chisome took a look at each other's faces.
"Name......get......that is a wonderful thing......but will disappear......scary."
"......Aah, so that's what it is"
This girl too, is afraid to lose her loved ones.
That is, in other words, she thinks that the daily life she spends with us now is especially precious and nothing else......I embraced such her as if to reassure her.
"Like as if there is anything to be afraid of. As I told Chisome earlier, as an older brother, and as a family member I will always be by your side. I won't leave you alone, you.......don't need to be alone in the dark world anymore."
".........Together forever?"
"Aa. That's why, will you accept it, a name?"
As she nodded, I told her her name.
We thought of a name that we thought would suit her......to engrave proof of her as one existence living in this world.
"Mashiro......that's the name we came up with."
"Mashi......ro"
"Aa. The meaning varies, but that's-"
"Onii......samaa!"
"Uoo!?"
In this way, in the truest sense of the word, she was born into this world.
However, about the saying "to give a name," what kind of meaning does it have, that I still don't know.
[Author's Afterword]
It's hard to name.
[Tl note no 1: Honoured me well, in Japanese, the kanji for honoured means "bow" or "salute" but that didn't make sense especially for the latter one, but I remember in one of the WN I read (maybe, I'm kind of forgetful about it too) how does japanese people bestowing upon someone honour but I don't remember well what the gesture is called so I guess it was somewhat by bowing, maybe.]
[Tl note no 2: "無垢, muku" means pure or innocent, "白無垢, shiromuku" means white kimono]
[Tl note no 3: stained with black blood is the literal meaning of Kuro Chisome's name and Pure white is the meaning of Mashiro.]