Wrecking Fantasy with Technology

Cave in Great Demon Law Forest

After healing a little more, the sibling duo finally starting roaming around Harry’s place.

Their “ex” sect’s members had been releasing a slow-acting qi poison due to which their dantians had become a mess and would have even taken their lives if Harry had not stepped in. (Thus the fact that Qing’s dantian looked so terrible.)

Their dantians would still require some time to recover, but since their physical bodies had majorly recovered, they could start moving around at least.

This still didn’t mean that they could start meditating to cultivate.

Now, Harry had initially thought that it would be best to just surgically remove them. But the system had strongly opposed the removal of their dantians, saying that these two were too talented in cultivation and thus too important to have their dantians removed.

Finally, it was decided that the system will guide Harry on how to treat them.

Both of them had spent their first couple of days just staring in awe at all the wonders present in the supposed cave.
It of course didn’t look like a cave due to the residence editor. And aside from that, Harry himself had stuffed the place with all sorts of modern amenities.

A lot of the furniture he had crafted himself, using his newly gained carpentry knowledge.

The other pieces of tech were something that he had been slowly and slowly sneaking in through the system store under the name of making the place habitable for the sibling duo.

After a certain time, the system had surprisingly caught him and confronted him. (definitely not due to the huge cake he had taken under the name of storing it for the Long siblings but had instead finished it off within a day...)

After spending a few days arguing about this, the two of them made a decision together.

Harry could take whatever he wanted to from the system store in the time before the siblings came around, however, everything that he’ll take will break in exactly five years from the day he had come into the cave.

Thankfully he did manage to convince the system to leave the clothes and the very essential items from the starter pack kit alone.

The two always kept asking him a bunch of questions.

“Brother Harry, how does this thing work?”

“Harry, are you serious that the water coming from this ‘tap’ thing is not through some mystical art?”

“Elder brother Harry, what’s this written over here?”

“Hey Harry, how why is read spoken like lead and lead spoken like read but read is neither spoken like lead nor read?”

“...”

Harry had also begun teaching them English.

And he naturally began the lessons thinking the famous last words, “How hard can it be?”

And boy was he sorry for ever thinking that there is anything simple in life.

Like most people on Earth, he learnt English from a very young age. So, by the time he came to college, it was the most natural thing to him.

But what he didn’t realize was the fact that since he learnt it from a very young age, he never got to know just how difficult of a language it is to learn from scratch.

It was only while teaching these two that he found out that a lot of the words and meanings that come to him naturally, don’t make one bit of sense to someone who doesn’t know English.

But this wasn’t the only annoying thing he had to teach them.

After their dantians healed, Qing and Shin began cultivation again.

By that time, they were somewhat used to all the “wonders” of Harry’s place.

So, most of their time awake, except for things like eating, bathing, learning English etc., went in meditating and doing fighting practice.

The meditation thing was something that Harry found quite boring. So, he was normally doing some other work at that time or hitting the gym.

The fighting practice was also something that Harry didn’t find too interesting.

But, after watching it just once on a whim, he decided to step in to guide them.

The reason?

They just wouldn't stop scream till it seemed like their lungs would burst out.

Just like how it goes in most of the wuxia series, these two also kept shouting out the names of the techniques they used right before using them unless they weren’t using some special technique and just doing random moves.

And, naturally, all the names they shouted sounded so cheesy that Harry felt like dying.

“But brother Harry, isn’t that how everyone does it?”

“Yeah, it’s only normal! It’s not like there’s some advantage if we don’t shout names...”

Poor kids…

This is what they have seen and been taught all their lives.

Harry felt that he had to fix that.

Otherwise, even if these two don’t die, he’ll die from all that cringe first!

Who the heck calls their technique “Pink Plum’s Immortal Fist”!!??

If Harry had to do something like this, he’d rather die than do it!

‘Haaaaah... This is going to be some very fracking long five years...’

But at least that “It’s not like there’s some advantage” thing was solved quickly.

All it took was a study of what all those techniques were and their effects. (It was hell to even look at that list of flowery technique names...)

One thorough (and painful) study of techniques later, Harry was all prepared to destroy the siblings while barely even moving. It did take more than a month to finish studying though...

So, after a few more agonising days of listening to them fight later, Harry finally decided that it was time to teach them just how dumb their entire country is.

“Elder brother Harry, are you sure that you want to fight with us with such handicaps?”

“Yeah Harry, even if you are very strong, way stronger than us, giving us so many advantages feels a little too much.”

Qing and Shin started getting worried when Harry suddenly proposed a practice fight while giving them so many advantages.

The conditions he kept were that he will limit his strength to their level or less, do minimum movements and fight them barehanded. They, on the other hand, had to give it their everything and try to take him down. They had no limitation placed on them and neither were they allowed to do so themselves.

The fight started.

Shin came running first and shouted “Pink Plum’s Immortal Fist!”

So, naturally, Harry had a look of part disgust and part disappointment on his face as he dodged according to the evasion plans he had made for this particular move.

Then he just gave two slight jabs to Shin.

One broke his balance and the other one focused on the new set of openings created to knock him down.

“Guys, giving it your everything means that you attack together! It’s like you have a huge pile of rocks that can easily crush a person but you throw them one by one. If you do that, your rocks run out and the person doesn’t get damaged much. If you threw them all together, you would have probably crushed the guy and escaped. But what you did just wasted your power and will get you killed in a real fight!”

This time both of them came together all the while shouting out their technique names at the top of their lungs.

Naturally, the only person left standing at the end was Harry.

“How can you be so strong even after so many disadvantages?”

“Elder brother Harry, leaving my useless brother aside, how can you hit such a beautiful girl like me?”

“Hey sis, I’m right here, you know?”, said Shin while staring at Qing.

“Guys, guys, I’ll answer your questions. Just don’t break out into a fight here.

My dear Qing, all I have to say to you is, I am a believer in Gender Equality!

So, how can I leave you unharmed but go about beating the sh*t out of your brother?

I need to give both of you the same treatment. Hence, both of you need to get beaten up an equal amount. Am I right?”

“...”

“...”

“And as for Shin’s question, when you guys announce exactly what you’re going to do to me while you’re running towards me, how can I not take advantage and beat the sh*t out of you guys?

This is what I’ve been trying to teach you guys.

Stop. Screaming. Technique. Names!

Do you see how bad fights can get?

If this was a real fight against some cultivator stronger than me and I knew his techniques, I could easily defeat him since I know what he’ll do due to his habit of shouting technique names.

If he uses a specific punching technique, I’ll know exactly how he’ll be moving since I know what the technique is about. And I can use it to both dodge and counter-attack.

And, even if I couldn’t defeat him, I’ll still be able to easily escape because if the technique requires him to move towards the right, all I have to do is move towards the left. And his technique fails.

Do you guys understand?”

The siblings looked at him in awe and shock.

How could they not have noticed such a fatal flaw!?

Qing was even more shocked since she always felt that her brother was the stupid one of the two and she was the smart one. So, how could she have missed this?

No wonder he challenged them and gave them so many advantages.

If he didn’t, these guys would even have started moving before the match ended!

Looking at their depressed faces, Harry could make out they did realize their stupidity.

Now the question was how long will it take to overcome this stupidity.

And the answer was…

A big, fat “YES”!

Or from Harry’s point of view, a big fat “OH NO!”...

Teaching them how to not scream out technique names felt more difficult than teaching a fish to breathe air. (In fact, in the future, Harry does artificially mutate functioning lungs in a fish faster than the time it took him to teach these two.)

He tried everything from explaining, sweet-talking, bribing and even beating them up every time their lips seemed to want to move.

But just one fight where he wasn’t involved and all that effort went down the drain with a “Pink Plum’s Immortal Fist”...

‘Haaaaaaaaaaaah… Gods in heaven! If you are listening, please just kill me already!!’

[The system advises the host to not disturb the gods for such trivial matters.]

“Fine… It’s going to take forever but I will definitely teach these two how to fight without screaming so much, even if I have to rip their vocal cords out to do it!”

Harry said this while starting to leak bits of killing intent.

The two siblings were just passing by to get dinner when they overheard Harry talking to himself.

“Hey bro, I think we should pick up some speed on that no-talking type fights, no?”

“Yeah, we should. I like my voice. I really, really don’t want to lose it so early… Gulp.”

The two siblings started sweating buckets exactly like Peele from that meme.

The next day, they themselves ended up suggesting Harry gag them while they fight, leaving him quite confused and also worried that all his beating had opened a new door for them.

‘Hey, system, any idea what in the world happened??’

[...]

***

It finally took just one more week and the duo was fighting like ninjas. Forget their mouths, it felt like their entire bodies forgot to make sounds.

But the stupidest thing that happened was that they sometimes even forgot to answer questions.

After this, it took yet another week and a thorough lecturing to get them to talk normally again.

And just like that, five months had passed since Harry came into this world.

Now, that the sibling duo learnt to not scream so much while fighting (the system never told Harry the reason for their progress), Harry felt that it was time to let them go for some real training in the wild.

Cultivation wise, these two were monsters and could have normally done pretty well even without training.

But the only issue was that the beasts living here had become pretty used to Harry’s crazy level moves. If any regular cultivator, who wasn’t like Harry, went hunting, the danger they would face would be much higher.

Even this time around, Harry had planned to closely follow them to make sure that no major harm came to them.

He had read a lot of stories about transmigration systems. His system seemed very helpful in comparison to the ones shown there that barely help the protagonists and just threaten to rip their soul apart every time they make the tiniest mistake.

But he knew that all this kindness probably doesn’t come for free and there was no way in hell that he would allow himself to get on his system’s bad side.

While thinking this, Harry began preparing for the mess of a hunt that was probably going to happen the next day.

But at least he felt confident that he wouldn’t let the siblings get injured. As for himself, the system always said that it would take care of him.

‘Oh well, let’s worry about tomorrow when it comes around...’