When Immortal Ascension Fails Time Travel to Try Again

I especially had to review the tricky spiritual plants.

The first was Crimson Blush-Chrysanthemum — a spiritual flower with many red and pink petals that had properties that focused on the bowel region and was one of this pill’s main ingredients. But the temperature had to be very specifically prepared so it would melt just right instead of burn.

Tearful Lapis Hawthorn — a red spiritual hawthorn with bright blue teardrop-shaped marks. The properties often revolved around making things flow. Hehehe.

This was also one of the main ingredients and had a slight yin nature so it needed to be paired with a yang-natured herb that wouldn’t overwhelm it. I would pair it with the Warm Salt-Crusted Grass.

Festering King Root- a white radish-shaped spiritual root that appeared as if it was rotting. It also had wrinkles in the shape of the King character. Its properties... well, this was basically a poison that gave people the shits... only with spiritual potency. But it was tricky because I would need to slice it in half just before I threw it in. I couldn't use sword Qi to do it either.

Because this pill also needed to work in five stages, that meant I would have to use a specific shaping technique combined with specific herbs. It wasn’t exactly a time-release coating like pills from my past life but it had a similar effect.

I mentally noted the three grasses that created those effects. They would need special attention and had to go in last.

Since I didn’t want to get strange looks, I would use antique methodology while hiding some of the improved ones within.

So, not only did I need to make a high-quality diarrhea pill, but I also had to hide my advanced techniques behind a cloak of inane outdated hand seals.

I sighed. Shit was hard... but that was why the Five Stages Bowel Clearing Dan existed.

When I looked up from my trance, I noticed that many of the young alchemists around me had already begun.

I started to work on the specific parts that could be prepared in advance.

For this batch, that entailed trimming unnecessary portions of three roots, soaking one flower in a special mundane spring water, and in one rare case, crushing a grass into paste.

Alchemy was actual hard fucking work —especially with an injury— and the fact that I was almost certain the original author would have glossed over the descriptions of how intensely hard it was... well, fuck him.

I calmed myself down and increased the fire with a hand gesture.

Once I was focused, I ensured that the temperature within the pot was perfect then I grabbed a shimmering stalk called Glittering Golden Dryweed with my spiritual energy. This would contaminate it and the pill itself with my energy, but for most pills it didn’t matter.

This weed was a good neutral plant to start this pill off with. I lifted the lid and tossed it inside. Using steady even breaths as my guide, I began counting. Simultaneously, I grabbed the next herb, the one that had been crushed into a paste. Once I reached the count of 22 breaths, I opened the lid and threw the paste into the furnace. I closed the lid and monitored the interior.

The paste melted and melded evenly with the liquified Glittering Golden Dryweed. This was now called an alchemical solution.

From there I waited several dozen breaths for each spiritual plant to fully melt before adding in the next several, while adjusting the fire and thus the temperature inside Old Smokey as needed.

When the temperature was right, I added the Crimson Blush-Chrysanthemum. As my side started to ache, I threw in Tearful Lapis Hawthorn then waited three breaths and threw in its pair.

Then, like the beautiful pro I was, I grabbed the Festering King Root and one of the provided knives and sliced it perfectly in half. Then using my spiritual energy, threw both sides into the pot. The solution bubbled but quickly calmed as it melted.

It was finally time to add the last three time-release-effect plants.

First the stalk of Vibrant Orange Pearl Grass, then, four breaths later, before it had fully melted, add in the Snail Viscous Snot Root.

Wait eight breaths for the first one to completely melt and then split the Daylight Bending Grain directly in half. Add the first, wait thirteen for the root to fully melt, then add in the other half.

I closed the lid then counted for fifteen breaths until the last half melted.

Now!

Making a series of hand seals, I formed the pills into perfectly round balls. Quickly, I lifted the lid and slapped the side of Old Smokey in the traditional, ’evacuate the pill from the cauldron,’ gesture, causing a dozen pills to fly up where I caught them in a jade pill bottle the guild provided.

I may have also burned my hand a little. Stupid low realm. Stupid traditional methods.