5 — Polydipsia
Later in the evening, after Lilianna had found Lycoris spacing out on the training room floor and invited her back to her private study…
“So I, uh… bumped into one of the cleaning staff…”
He’d decided it was best to come clean and admit to Lilianna the (partial) truth of what he’d been up to, rather than keep it to himself and risk it blowing up in both their faces.
Much as he loved the idea of dragging the tyrant down to Hell, over the past few weeks he’d come to understand that any replacement for her would be… even less friendly to humanity.
Some of the Families had rather radical ideas about what to do with humans, if he could believe her words. Not that he didn’t see any particular reason to doubt her; the look of revulsion on her face as she brought up things like lobotomization, indentured labor, and blood farms appeared far too genuine to be performatory. Plus, she’d explained how she’d tried to cripple those practices by implementing draconian financial policies.
But it still didn’t mean he had to like her.
“Did you cut them down?”
“H-Haah!? No of course not! Why would I do something like that!?”
“We were under the impression you held no qualms about cutting down vampires. Our palace is quite shorthanded for a reason, after all.”
The woman smirked as she moved one of the white pieces—a bishop cloaked in a luxurious coat—across the board.
She’d made good on her initial word and dedicated at least one full evening to teaching him how to play chess, but to a bystander… it probably looked more akin to an adult picking on a small child.
Though, in at least one player’s opinion, that’s exactly what it was.
“Grn… I… assumed it would only cause you more headache to keep her alive!”
“Is that so… well go on, tell us what happened.”
“Er… they mistook me for you, and then ran away like I was about to chop their head off.”
Lilianna laughed heartily—somehow maintaining a regal dignity despite the gesture—as she leaned back in her seat.
“Such an act would be far too wasteful and short-sighted. Indeed we may have the odd particularly worthless outlier disposed of—”
“I knew you were a bloodthirsty—”
“—But that is only, of course, to keep up appearances of an ill-tempered sovereign. A servant is far less likely to turn against a ruler who would butcher them for treachery than one who appears meek.”
Lycoris frowned at the board.
“But an oppressive ruler is just as likely to be resented by their subjects, which would only foment unrest if not outright rebellion.”
“The carrot is as important as the stick,” she nodded in agreement, “But where did our sweet little flower hear that nugget of wisdom?”
He moved a farmer wielding a pitchfork—a pawn—up a square. He wasn’t sure why, but he was certain he was losing.
“I know at least what qualities make for a good leader. Do you really think I’m as ignorant as a child?”
“You can hardly blame us when we heard you cannot read.”
“Ugggh I can read, just… enough for deployment orders, and materiel counts.”
“Hardly befitting a noblewoman.” Lilianna moved a white knight with great wings wrapped around it like a cloak next.
He silently cursed himself for not seeing it coming—his pawn was useless now. “Mrgh… Is it that big of a deal? You said that we— that vampires don’t even write notes.”
“To be incapable of quoting the classics is to admit you’re uneducated. We will not permit our precious Lycoris to suffer such humiliation.”
As he moved his rook, Lilianna immediately checkmated his king with her queen—a piece with a rather conspicuously familiar visage.
“Oh come on!”
“Perhaps you should try playing white? Going first does grant an advantage—”
“I’m not going to play with the vampire pieces.”
“Such a petty child… but such stubbornness is not without its charm. Perhaps we should hurry on to today’s main topic…”
The matriarch stood up from her seat, stepping around Lycoris and placing a hand delicately atop his head from behind.
“Wh-What? You’re scaring me again.”
“It’s nothing wicked, dear. Just one more subject to add to your repertoire. Today we shall begin teaching you magic.”
“Magic…”
Now this actually piqued his curiosity.
Not that chess hadn’t proven engaging or novel, but it wasn’t much fun being so completely outclassed by someone who was playing what felt like a solved game. If she wiped the floor with him any harder, that maid would be out of a job. He probably would’ve had better luck if he tried distracting her and moving pieces around at random.
But magic was a topic he’d completely written off before.
He hadn’t discovered his potential until he was already well into his training as a knight, and by then he was too old to begin learning.
Magic education required a flexible mind, took a great length of time—indeed some people never seemed to stop learning new things about magic—and required highly specialized knowledge, along with rather specific cleansing rituals to bring oneself closer to the Goddess.
Lycoris wondered how vampires went about it, given their… blasphemous nature. The notion of not following the Goddess’ teachings and learning magic through dark means troubled him, but his circumstances did mean he functionally had limitless time to dedicate to the craft. Maybe he could find a path back into the Goddess’ Light through the arcane.
Plus, he was always curious about how magic actually worked, and Elham—bless his heart—had only further confused the poor veteran knight when he tried to explain.
“Don’t be so nervous, we won’t demand you summon an avatar of death incarnate or anything so unnecessarily aggrandized. Manipulating the currents in your body is always the first step.”
She slid her hand down the side of Lycoris’ head and gave his shoulder a little pinch.
“Eep!”
“Now, follow along with our instructions.”
“We’re starting right now!?”
“Unlike most of our kin, we believe it best to strike while the iron is hot. Though fair warning, it will sting a little at first.”
Her other hand came down on his opposite shoulder, sending a shiver down his spine.
“You’re not really instilling any confidence here!”
“First, close your eyes and relax your shoulders.”
“Don’t just ignore me! How am I supposed to relax when you—ow! Ow ow ow stop pinching!”
“Focus on your heartbeat, concentrate on the blood flowing through your veins.”
He grumbled as he complied, closing his eyes and forcing himself to exhale slowly.
“You haven’t stopped pinching, you know…” he groused.
“Shh, focus now dear,” her voice was a whisper in his ear, “if you can’t manage this much, you’ll get nowhere.”
“Mrngh… you’re doing that thing again.”
He didn’t raise a fuss this time though, instead choosing to trust that she wouldn’t intentionally inflict harm upon him. Their time together had proved that she was at least interested in protecting her future asset.
“You needn’t breathe, it’s a needless distraction.”
“So’s your voice.”
Gradually, Lycoris felt the tension vanish from his shoulders; Lilianna’s hands gradually slid down his arms and cupped his small fingers; his mother’s chin set down softly atop his head as her chest pressed against his back.
The world gradually receded into the distance, the crackling of the fireplace and rumbling of clouds beyond the palace walls blurring into white noise, and then fading entirely. All that remained was two heartbeats in synchronicity, and his mother’s voice.
“Are you focusing on your pulse?”
“Mmm…”
“Good girl. Feel it flow from your core outward. To your head, to your hands, to your legs.”
She gently squeezed her daughter’s hands, her sharp nails lightly pressing into Lycoris’ palms.
Her mother’s voice felt oddly… heavy, like she was listening while underwater. All the earlier frustration had burned away and left the little vampire feeling surprisingly calm.
“Now take your hands,” Lilianna slowly lifted her hands up, holding them as though cupping a bowl, “and feel that flow outward, meeting in the middle. Completing a circuit.”
She sank deeper into the soothing darkness, her sense of self melting into the currents flowing through her as she navigated the intricate winding channels.
Her emotions bubbled up and away as she drifted through the stream, a faint blue light shining down from overhead, dancing as the waves rolled over her.
Is this the Goddess’ light…?
Like a piece of aimless driftwood, she felt the current gradually push her forward and upward; some lingering part of her felt a twinge of nervousness, urging her to swim back down to the comforting sea floor beneath.
But as that bubbled away too, she surged toward the glittering light above.
A pressure built up all around, the thin foamy membrane at the surface stubbornly refusing her.
She felt herself press against it, a distant sense of irritation ebbing and flowing with the current as she gradually sank back down.
“Thou art heritor to eternity, none may deny thee passage.”
A strange voice thrummed through her whole being, the gentle flow suddenly becoming discordant, as a violent whorl began to churn, with herself at its center.
She swam back down to the depths, gathering up all the darkness around herself like a tidal cloak, before violently shooting toward the mocking film and stabbing through it.
At the same time, she felt a sharp sensation in her palms, as her mother’s voice gradually returned to her ears.
“Now visualize… hm, perhaps a sphere? That’s a fairly simple shape to begin with.”
“‘Kay…”
Shards of memories fell around her like stardust, as cold night air sent a shiver through her.
The light had vanished when she overpowered it, and she drifted through darkness until her mind latched on to a familiar location.
She thought back to the great castle’s armory in the heart of the capital. The stale air filled her nostrils as she drifted like a ghost through its silent halls, naught but spiders having invaded its depths. Therein were useless stockpiles of cannonballs, collecting rust and dust while men fought on the front lines far away.
As she stared at them, the depths of that man’s foolishness stirred flickering rage and regret within her, but she focused on the shape of the piled up munitions instead. The slight imperfections and dents in the steel that comprised them came into clear focus, as though she were staring at them through a magnifying glass.
“Oh,” Lilianna sounded surprised, “Are you sure you’ve never done this before? You’re a natural! Go on, open your eyes. Carefully, though, keep your focus.”
“E-Er…”
Pulled back into reality, Lycoris bashfully complied and slowly peeked with one eye, the other quickly following as they widened in shock.
Between her palms was a coarsely-textured blue orb, rippling slightly as she stared at it.
She saw her mother’s bloodied fingers, softly rubbing the palms of her hands, wiping away the… blood!?
“A-Aaah!?”
The moment he slipped into panic, the blue sphere popped and blood splashed outward, staining the chessboard and his sleeveless summer dress.
“Are you alright, Lycoris?”
She let go of his hands and embraced him from behind, squeezing softly as he stared at his palms.
“What… did you do?” he growled, feeling his pulse spike as the blood splatters began to ripple.
“The trance doesn’t work as well if you’re fully cognizant of what’s going on. And it’s how everyone learns to first tap into their—”
“I know how to use my mana! You’ve literally fought me! Why are you always like this!? Why can’t you just trust me and tell—”
“Do not lecture us about trust, Lycoris.”
He froze, the sudden souring of the tyrant’s tone instilling a nightmarish dread in him.
Ghk. I almost… forgot who she was…
“Indeed we have fought together, and you’ve suffered worse injuries while sparring, if one could even call this an injury. It is no form of punishment, but a necessary part to helping you feel the flow of your mana through your veins. Even if you’ve applied it to your swordsmanship in the past, your body is different now. This is more alike to building a house rather than starting a fire; you cannot apply half-assed knowledge to something you’ve never experienced in truth. You will start from the same foundation that all do.”
“A-Ah…”
“You have great talent, but it must be refined properly so that it might blossom in full. So, Lycoris, trust us.”
“I’m…”
Not sure I can. How could I, when I’ve only ever been subject to…
“Perhaps it was too soon for this after all…” Lilianna lamented, clearly frustrated.
Somehow, that shred of genuine disappointment bit deeper than any ire she’d expressed.
“W… wait! It’s… I was, just startled. I mean who wouldn’t be? With no explanation and suddenly having my hands stabbed and a big globule of my b… blood, floating like that…”
“You need to work on your deceit as well, Lyco…”
He couldn’t tell what sort of face she was making, but the idea of letting her down bothered him. Even though he shouldn’t have cared one lick what she felt, it was like a knot formed in his chest the moment he thought about it.
“I’m serious! I’ll keep practicing! We can add it to the rotation! I could use the change of pace after all! Er, but… are you going to have to uh, stab my hands every time…?”
“At first. Eventually you’ll be able to draw upon the ambient mana around us, using the supply within your body as a mere catalyst. But for now, it's easiest to teach you by bringing mana out from inside.”
“Ah…”
Is this what Elham had to go through as well for the Church? …Is that why he always had so much trouble explaining it?
“You needn’t force yourself, sweet little flower.”
He closed his eyes and held his hands over her own still embracing him.
“I said I was serious. You just… have to stop surprising me. This is all hard enough already.”
“That may be a little difficult,” she mumbled quietly, “but okay. Mommy will do anything for our adorable daughter~”
In the dimly lit and quiet study, Lilianna rubbed her head against Lycoris, the small vampire curling up in embarrassment.
* * *
“Hey old man, you hanging in there? You don’t look too great.”
“Yeah, it’s just… could really use a drink, y’know? We’ve been marching along this trail for a week already.”
“All we have on hand is water, you’ll have to tough it out.”
“There’s a number of budding saffron along this path, I could pluck some and boil an herbal tea to relax you!”
“Nah, nahh… it’s my own fault for letting it get so bad.”
“Hmm, perhaps you should take Elham up on the offer. If your sword arm ends up dulled, we’d have a rough time fighting against bandits.”
“We can’t afford to start a fire right now anyways, we’re in an open area and would get exposed in an instant.”
“Ah… right. Excellent point, Sir ×××××!”
“Quit calling me ‘Sir.’ I’m no knight, not anymore. Anyway, some combat might help me keep my focus off of the withdrawal. We’re near Sylph territory, yeah?”
“We are, but we should avoid provoking them. We can’t afford to deal with being harassed by their hit-and-run tactics when we press out onto the Great Plains.”
Lyco slowly opened his eyes, frowning as he wiped his hands with a small twilight-blue cloth embroidered with gold.
He’d been trying to focus, hoping to recreate what Lilianna helped guide him through before.
Unfortunately, his thoughts were too scattered and aimless; they inevitably wandered back to his friends whenever he tried. He couldn’t bring himself to jab his nails into his palms, the idea of it feeling like he’d be giving up a piece of his humanity.
Today was another day without the Exaltare present—they were growing more frequent. It made sense, she was the ruler of all vampires. No doubt there were a great many demands made of her… though the idea of her sitting on a throne handing out edicts impassively felt incongruous with the woman she’d shown herself to be in his presence.
He’d decided not to go out exploring, as he didn’t want to risk another accidental encounter with a member of the cleaning staff.
Instead, he sat alone on his bed, trying to practice his spellcraft, to no effect.
Not that it could really be called that, when he hadn’t even created a proper phenomenon even with Lilianna’s assistance; the process had fallen apart right at the step where he’d begin shaping his blood… or, mana, rather.
Flopping backwards, he stared up at his bed’s canopy.
I wonder what she’s actually doing right now? She calls it ‘court’ but… is it really the same as those stuffy ballroom parties the King ordered us to run security for…?
He rolled around a little, feeling rather aimless with nothing but time and no Lilianna there to help him fill it.
…I don’t miss her though! Honestly, I’m savoring this moment of rest! I just… dunno how to take a break, that’s all!
He’d always kept himself perpetually occupied in his previous life; whether as a peasant’s son, as a knight in the King’s army, or as lieutenant-commander, he was always throwing himself headfirst into his work. And after he’d lost his position, he filled the void with booze. He’d been quite lucky that Mizar dragged him away from the bottle, sparing him his father’s fate, but…
Thinking back on it, even now he felt a pang of thirst.
“Actually… I haven’t had anything to eat or drink in like half a month. I hadn’t thought about it until now but… that’s… that’s bad, right?”
He sat back up, placing a hand over his stomach.
“I know I’m a workaholic, but isn’t this neglectful parenting? If she’s going to act like my mom, shouldn’t she at least feed me?”
Though, after he thought on what he’d just said, a shiver of terror crawled up his spine, his blood ran cold.
“M-Maybe it’s better if she… doesn’t.”
His mouth felt dry.
That said…
His eyes wandered over to the cabinet nestled between vanity and balcony.
The rows of bottles had caught his attention on a couple of occasions, but he’d always pushed the feelings of thirst aside—a skill he’d honed while traveling with the Hero’s party.
…I was never really much of a wine drinker. Now that I think about it, why is this even in my room? She keeps calling me a child but leaves alcohol in here? I’d have half a mind to teach her a lesson by example, if it weren’t for the fact I know Mizar would be disappointed in me.
He got up and shuffled over to the cabinet, opened the door, and stared at the bottles inside.
“Definitely wine… but what year…”
Lilianna had told him that Vampires kept track of the year by how long the current Exaltare had ruled for. If they were currently in the three thousand six hundred and twenty eighth year of Lilianna then…
“Th… This bottle’s over two thousand years old!?”
He nearly dropped it in shock. The translucent mythril-layered glass bottle filled with murky liquid might’ve been able to survive the impact with the carpet, but he’d rather not risk wasting liquor over forty times his age.
Though… he was tempted to uncork it and savor the scent, as both a curiosity and a lesson for leaving something so valuable just laying around in his room.
And he was incredibly thirsty.
I haven’t even had a glass of water since coming here. No matter how you look at it, that’s not normal!
He bit down on his lip. “But I won’t. I can’t! I promised Mizar! B-Besides, all these bottles are at least this old… actually, now I’m kind of terrified at the net worth sitting inside this cabinet.”
Lycoris slowly rolled the bottle in his hands—
“EEEEEEK!!”
—before jumping with a start.
“A scream!? Here!? But who, why? No, wait, I gotta move!”
Acting on instinct, he charged out the door without hesitation.
The bottle of blood rolled along the red carpet, still unopened.