Two Weeks Between Love and Hate

Laying in bed for over an hour, praying for sleep. Jason’s mind was a flurry of thoughts until mental exhaustion finally overtook him and he drifted off to sleep. His dreams were anything but pleasant: His father’s passing, his mother’s grief, and almost all of high school. All of it came back to torment him. Haunted by ghostly figures of classmates who had nothing but eyes on their face, lined the halls as he walked through the school. They still somehow insulted and berated him, their words coming out as vicious screams. the worse part was the sound of his mother crying in the distance. The weight of it all pressed down on him.

Trying to run faster only made the phantoms of Jason’s past start laughing and spit even meaner insults at him. The desperate need to get out of that place driving him forward. He had to keep running. He needed to go faster, yet he was still going as slow as before. The harder he tried to run the more his body started swelling, becoming bigger, fatter. Quickly becoming a bloated, disgusting blob of flesh that jiggled and shook as tried to run, weighing him down more and more with each passing second. The laughter growing louder in his ears. Soon his flesh was dragging on the floor, slowing him down even further.

A sudden flash drew Jason’s attention to the end of the hall. He saw a figure was standing in front of a bright light that made him squint. It was near impossible to make out who or what it was due to the intensity. All the while, his body continued to swell. It was folding over his eyes now as he reached out for the figure. Somehow, he knew it was his only hope. But as he grew too heavy to move anymore, he fell forward. His mass of flesh pinning him to the floor.

“Help… please!” Jason cried out to the figure.

It watched him with sad eyes, as he was slowly crushed under his own weight. He clenched his eyes shut and cried out in pain while the phantoms continued to mock him mercilessly.

The lone figure slowly reached out, somehow so close to him now. The pale hand reached him easily and lightly caressed his cheek. His eyes opened wide, his vision no longer hindered, as all the excess fat and flesh vanished instantly. Jason gazed up at the figure from the floor, still cloaked in shadow.

“W-who are you?” He asked, feeling the soft, warm hand rest against his cheek.

Everything had gone silent, the ghosts fading away before his eyes. There was a small giggle before the figure spoke to him softly.

“Let me help you.”

Jolting upright, Jason woke up with a heavy gasp, like he had been holding his breath. Drenched in a cold sweat, clutching his blanket tight. His eyes were wide with panic as he gazed into the blackness of his room. His whole body shuddering in fear. The dreams still felt so vivid, so real.

“Fuck… what a nightmare.” He mumbled to himself looking at his shaking hands still gripping his blanket.

“Jason, are you alright?” the same voice from his dream asked him.

His head quickly turned to see someone sitting beside him in the dark on the bed. His first reaction was more fear, but as he saw the glint of eyes filled with concern looking back at him. The fear quickly faded.

Jason blinked several times and rubbed his eyes, trying to clear his vision of watery tears. Eventually, the silhouette of Jillian sitting next to him became clear. Her hair was pulled back into a ponytail, its natural frizz poofing out at the end. She had her large hoodie on, obscuring most of her body. He stared at her in stunned silence for several long moments.

“Hey, what’s wrong? Say something, please,” Jillian pleaded, frowning in worry. Jason hadn’t said anything for almost a minute now.

“J-Jillian? What are you…H-how did you?” he stammered, still catching his breath. She let out a small breath of relief when he finally spoke. Locking eyes with him, she gave him a small smile.

“I told you I’d be here if you kept your window unlocked. But first answer me Jason, are you alright? You are soaked with sweat, and you were tossing and turning pretty violently. You almost gave me a heart attack when you woke up so suddenly, too.” A little fear tinting her words, but she was more worried than anything.

Jillian reached out, and the familiar sensation of her hand pressing against his cheek. Flinching instinctively, he pushed her hand away.

“I’m fine…” his words were a little sharp. “I-… I was just having some messed up dreams, that’s all.” He muttered, running a hand through his sweat-soaked hair. Looking down at his hand, it was still shaking slightly, frowning deeply.

Jillian frowned as well, but slowly got to her feet.

Jason wasn’t really paying attention to what she was doing at this point, plus it was dark. He felt a shiver run through him from the cold sweat on his body.

She climbed onto the bed on her knees.

“Let me help you…” Jillian’s voice was soft and soothing. Watching her climb onto his bed, he peered into her eyes, one of the few things he could see clearly in the dark room.

“Help me? I don’t need your help I... wait, why are you here again? I know you said you’d be here, but why?” He argued, scowling at her, prompting her to let out a sigh.

“Because I messed up earlier,” she confessed, “I got so caught up with everything that happened with June... I somehow forgot about us.” She crawled closer to Jason, reaching out to touch his cheek again.

Jason tried to lean back, but he got trapped again the wall next to his bed. “Us? There is no us Jillian.” he said defiantly.

Jillian’s hand reached his cheek, and her nails lightly dragged along his stubble.

“That’s not true…” whispering to him, as she got even closer. “Please, Jason...Just let me make it up to you. Let me help you,” she pleaded.

Those words and her hand against his cheek made his whole body shudder, but in a way that was pleasant. His nightmare suddenly came back to him, and he half expected himself to swell up with fat, but he never did. This was no longer a dream.

Still, remembering the voice and the hand that touched his cheek in his dream. It became clear that she had been the one in his dream. She had been the one salvation, the only one that looked at him with kindness. But he didn’t understand why. It had been the complete opposite back in school. But it didn’t change the facts. It didn’t change how he still felt about her.

Jason reached up and gently took her wrist, making her eyes meet his in worry.

“Jason?” her words came out scared with the fear he would send her away. She knew that if he rejected her this time. That was it. They would really be over and done with.

Jason closed his eyes, taking a deep breath, holding it as silence filled the room. The dim moonlight framed his face through the blinds. His expression became a mask of serene calmness as he let his breath out slowly. A few strands of dark hair falling over his forehead, still damp with sweat. He finally opened his eyes again, letting the soft light reflect off the deep green orbs of his eyes.

“I... I want you. I don’t know how or why, but I want you so fucking bad,” he confessed, bringing a soft smile to her face. “But…” He paused, and Jillian tilted her head, looking at him. “I feel like… if we take this step...I don’t know if I will be able to separate the physical...from emotional feelings.” His mask of calmness was now gone as he looked away, replaced by a look of embarrassment.

Jillian’s eyes widened at Jason’s words. “He’s afraid that if we have sex… he will fall for me?” The thought made her face burn hot with so many different emotions. She told him before they could just fool around with no strings attached. And she had been fine with that. She thought she was still fine with that. But hearing that he might want more than just sex forced her to ask herself the question.

“Do I want that?”

The two sat in silence for a long time, neither able to look at the other now. She hadn’t planned on falling for anyone when she offered that deal to Jason. Yeah, she wanted to be someone he could trust… but a relationship. Her heart thudded hard in her chest, thinking about what they might become.

“Um, do you… not want anything more?” She bit her lip at the question. Not sure if she even wanted to hear his answer.

He finally met her gaze again, a stunned look at the return question. “Oh… well… I thought you… didn’t want… that.” He said slowly, now unable to look away as they sat face to face on his bed.

Jillian hesitated and sucked on her lips nervously. “Umm, well I mean, Heh.” She paused after letting out the nervous chuckle, face hot with emotion.

“It’s not something I expected to hear from you to be honest…not that I’m upset about it.” She said a soft smiled on her face. Though they couldn’t see each other’s faces clearly, there was this new tension between them as silence overtook them again.

While the two remained quiet, Jillian seemed to come to a decision about what she wanted to do. She reached up and placed both hands on his shoulders.

“What are you…” Jason started, but paused as she was suddenly in his lap, straddling him. Separated by only his blanket. Her hands gripped his shoulders tight.

“Jason...I…I think I could be happy… being yours… but I don’t think you want someone like me,” she suddenly confessed.

“Huh… what do you mean?” Jason asked as confusion set in, feeling her trembling slightly in his lap.

“The Jillian I show you…that’s just the small part of myself I allow you to see,” she paused, sniffing back tears. “That day at graduation…you were right, so right, it hurts.” Jillian leaned into him, burying her face in his chest.

“You aren’t making sense. What about graduation?” Jason could barely remember that day anymore. All he knew was that it was the last time he saw her. One of the most freeing days of his life. Yet she was shedding tears thinking about it. She sniffed loudly before she continued.

“You told me how my life would be one big mess, that I would fail at everything… that I was going to suffer... and you were right… It all came true.” She whimpered sadly.

She had replayed his words from that day so many times in her head, but this was the first time she said them aloud. She cried, she sobbed heavy, painful tears into his bare chest. All Jason could do was sit there as she gripped his shoulders tight, nails digging into his skin. There was really only one thing he felt he could do at this point.

Jason gently wrapped his arms around Jillian’s waist and pulled her against him.

Jillian tensed up as Jason touched her, then relaxed a bit, her nails easing up on his skin.

“S-sorry.” She apologized. “After high school I… I started talking with a guy online… I thought he would take care of me. And I didn’t want to be a burden anymore, so I left my family for him… I never even said goodbye…to anyone…I just took what I could… and left,” her voice cracking at the end as tears fell in rapid succession.

“He took care of me… But once I gave up everything he asked me too…He used me… He used my body for whatever sick and twisted pleasures whenever… however he wanted…and I let him.” Jillian’s grip on his shoulders tightened again as she sobbed. Jason just seemed to take it without complaint as he let her talk.

Taking a deep, shaky breath, Jillian sniffed before continuing. “I spent years simply obeying until I felt so fed up I tried to run away several times. He kept finding me and bringing me back. I barely managed to escape one night and finally made it back home this year… He is still probably looking for me…I don’t want to put you in danger or regret being with someone so used up and worthless.”

Her hands lost their grip, sliding down to rest on his chest. Her small body still trembled in his arms. Turning her head, she rested her cheek against his chest.

“You deserve someone better, someone that isn’t so broken. I won’t blame you if change your mind… I am just thankful that you put up with me for this long.” She held onto him tightly, waiting for a response, but Jason stayed silent for what felt like forever. Slowly, she looked up at him. “I’m sorry if I upset you...I-if you want, I still don’t mind if you use me just for sex... I just want you to know who I am,” she whimpered, closing her eyes as more tears leaked out, running down her face.

When Jason finally spoke, it was in a shaky tone. “Why…Why would you offer me something like that? After all you have been through…why?” he asked, his voice going quiet at the end with a deep scowl.

“…what?” Jillian looked up at him, surprised at the question but immediately figuring he was grossed out by her now. “I am sorry…I can just go-”

“Thats not what I want!” He cut her off suddenly, arms tightening around her.

“B-but.” She stammered.

“Please, just answer the question Jill.” He was looking down at her now and it felt like his gaze was boring into her soul.

Jillian took several moments before speaking again. “Jason…I’ve barely had the courage to talk with any guys since I got back. Hell, I barely speak to the guys that work at Mika’s…Men… Men scare me.” It didn’t seem like something she would say with how flirty she was with him. But the scared look on her face didn’t seem the least bit fake.

The scene at the buffet suddenly coming to his mind. The terrified look she had while that creep was staring at her. It made sense now.

“You…you are the first guy that I have been close to in a long time…” Jillian’s arms slowly wrapped around his chest as much as they could.

“When we laid together that first night…I had never felt so safe simply laying there with you. I wished I could feel like that every night…I still feel that way, each time you hold me in your arms.“ Lowering her gaze, she pressed her cheek back against his chest.

There was a long silence after that. She had shared so much with him, so much pain, that he didn’t even realize he had been clenching his fists nearly the whole time. His fists slowly relaxed as his large hands pressed against her back, pulling her close again.

Jillian looked up at him once more. His face creased into a deep frown. “J-jason?” her voice was quiet and wary, yet with him holding her like he was, she felt just as she said. Safe.

“I want to tell you the truth about how I lost my virginity Jill…” Jason said before he took a deep breath, steeling his nerves.

The courage that Jillian showed him by telling him so much. It made the decision to share his own story easier. Jillian leaned back slightly, quickly wiping her eyes. “You don’t have too Jason… I understand,” she said, reaching up and placing a hand on his cheek, using her thumb to stroke it softly. Swallowing a lump in his throat, he shook his head.

“I want to…Just… give me a moment.” He said, taking another quick breath.

Jillian nodded at him. “Take your time,” whispering sweetly to him, giving her full attention. He obviously didn’t want her to leave, which tentatively meant there was something more between them still.

“I… I went to a bar with my friend. But when he left, some strange lady approached me. She kept flirting with me, and trying to buy me drinks. No matter how many times I told her no or was rude to her, she just kept pushing… I…I didn’t see it. But I know she put something into my drink…” He paused when Jillian let out a small gasp, removing her arms from around his chest to cover her mouth with both hands.

“Y-you were...” she said in shock. Staring up at him with wide eyes.

Jason nodded only once, slowly. “As I leave, I suddenly feel like I had just had ten shots of whiskey injected into my veins. She is right there to basically catch me as it hits… And that’s it.” Grimacing at the retelling. The second time wasn’t any easier for him.

“The next thing I know…I am waking up in a motel room…Naked, still wearing a condom,” he said, biting the inside of his cheek as hard as he could, trying to contain his emotions.

Jillian reached halfway for him, to comfort him with her touch, but then thought better of touching him at this point.

“I’m so sorry Jason...” Her words were soft and filled with sympathy, as she grasped why he had gotten so upset that day she pushed for him to share. She felt a wave of nausea, realizing that Jason’s first time was literally raped from him.

“You don’t have to apologize… I don’t even remember it happening, but you spent years suffering...”

“Don’t be stupid. Just because yours was less time than mine doesn’t make it less painful.” She interrupted, scowling at him for a moment.

“It’s not a competition Jason… But thank you for telling me. It means a lot that you told me.” She tried to give him a smile, but it ended up being bittersweet.

“You… don’t think I’m pathetic or weak?” He had to ask, but all he got was a glare in return.

“Of course not! You were drugged, for christ’s sake. If anyone is pathetic, it’s that stupid bitch who did it.” There was an anger in Jillian’s tone that was almost comforting to hear. Jason could feel his heart thud in his chest once more.

There was a brief hesitation before he reached up and placed a hand on her cheek. And like it was second nature for Jillian to lean into his touch. Her gaze still locked on his. “Jill, you…you drive me crazy, but I don’t think you are broken. A broken person couldn’t come back from the depths of hell you endured and still be so alive.” He wasn’t the best at emotional conversations, but he tried at least.

“While I am being honest, I need to get this out… I can’t get you out of my mind, you are all i think about anymore. Every morning I wake up and you are my first thought. Before I fall asleep, your face is the last thing I see. It’s driving me insane. You drive me crazy and I just…can’t stop thinking about you.” He let out a deep breath, feeling rather embarrassed. Jillian couldn’t help but bite her lip and smile at him. Staring up at him as a rush of longing coursed through her. “I love it when you say that,” she responded in a quiet, sultry tone.

“You drive me crazy,” Jason repeated, that charming smile she adored so much, finally coming back to his face . “Mmm yeah, say it slower.” Jillian said, giggling softly.

The two shared a moment where they just gazed at one another, both feeling a million times lighter with all the weight off their shoulders. Without another word, Jillian slowly leaned in, closed her eyes, and tilted her head back with overly puckered lips. Not unlike how Jason had kissed her that very first time. She wasn’t quite tall enough to kiss his lips on her own from where she was sitting.

Thankfully, Jason was ready and waiting. Tilting his head forward, he met her halfway, their lips coming together in a rather loud and puckered kiss.

The two opened their eyes and shared a small laugh. Now close enough to see the other’s eyes clearly in the darkness. Simply smiling at each other in the silence. There were no more words needed. They both knew what the other wanted. And they shared the same desire.

Closing the short distance between them. Their lips came together again in a slow collision and the two were soon locked in a deep, passionate kiss.

Jason’s arms were wrapped tightly around her, one hand trailing up her back, finding its way into her hair, pulling her even deeper into the kiss. Jillian’s arms quickly moved to wrap around his neck. As they melted against each other, the sounds of their kissing filled the silence of the room. A pleasurable groan escaping him as she sucked in a breath through her nose and pulled herself up. Her tongue slipped past their lips and into his mouth. Jason welcomed it, his tongue reciprocating with enthusiasm. Their tongues danced together in a tantalizing rhythm.

Jillian let out a desperate moan as his tongue swirled around hers before he moved to suck on her lower lip, dragging his teeth along it lightly. Her whole body shivered, the heat in her abdomen burning so hot, her hips moved on their own, grinding against his lap.

They eventually broke apart after several minutes to catch their breath.

“Wow... You’ve gotten a lot better,” Jillian panted out, her lips still tingling from the kiss. Jason laughed a little in response, breathing heavily as well.

“Thanks, I had a good teacher,” he said with a grin, leaning in for another kiss as she giggled softly.

“Well you were a good student,” she admitted as they parted once more.

They gazed into each other’s eyes for a long moment before her expression changed slightly.

“Are you sure about this, Jason? Sorry but... I just want to be sure you’re really okay with… someone like me,” Jillian said softly, sounding like she was shy of all things. Jason couldn’t help but laugh a little.

“Are you trying to talk me out of it?” he teased, to which she quickly shook her head.

“N-no! Not at all...well maybe I am a little, I want it…I really, really want it... I’m just not used to… all of this,” she said, nervously biting her lower lip.

“This?” Jason questioned.

“Just… Having a guy treat me like… like I am more than just my body. That doesn’t make me feel bad for who I am. Yeah, we fight a lot, but the fact that you are still here, that you still want me… for more than just sex…” she explained, her breath quickening.

“I’m... happy... like stupidly happy. I am afraid this happiness is all just a crazy dream and I am going to wake up alone in that hellhole… But even if it is, and my days are numbered before I wake up… I want to spend them with you Jason,” she finished, leaning in to kiss him again, softly and sweetly.

Parting once more, she could barely see the slightly stunned look on his face.

“Jill, I... I hated you... I hated you for so, so long. You unknowingly dictated my life with the things you did… But only recently I realized I only hated the thought of you, the person who only lives in my memories now. Her words, the things she did, who she was,” Jason confessed, seeing her visibly shrink at his words, obviously ashamed of her past actions. But something in his words and the way he spoke caught her attention.

“But the Jill I know now... She’s obsessed with protecting her little sister, loves her friends and family deeply, and is loved by them. She owns up to her mistakes and apologizes for them…eventually. Even if that first apology was kinda lousy,” Jason said with a teasing smile.

Jillian lowered her head and fiddled with her hoodie strings, looking up at him with a playful glare and sticking her tongue out.

“But honestly, I see who you are now, and I admire that woman tremendously. All the work you’ve done to try and be better and do right by your family. It all...” Jason’s voice trailed off as he reached up and cupped her cheek, lifting her gaze to his. Gently caressing her freckled cheek with his thumb.

“It all made me realize I can’t deny how I feel any longer. I’ve been trying to fight off these feelings, but I just can’t anymore. I want this, Jill…I want you.” He wasn’t sure how he managed to get all that out, but the words just seemed to come to him one after another.

The two gazed at each other in the dim light, silently observing one another. Tears welled up in Jillian’s eyes once more. It felt like nobody truly understood her for who she was. People always reduced to her superficial traits: red hair, small chest, large butt, mean, selfish, moody. If more people looked a bit closer, maybe they’d see what he saw. Her complexity, her bitterness, her frustration with the unfair world around her.

“Thank you,” Jillian murmured weakly to Jason, before reaching out and grabbing his face. The both leaned in for a deep kiss. Happy tears continued to streak down her face as their lips met. The soft, smacking sounds seemed so loud now.

It didn’t take long for them both to feel the burgeoning arousal between them. Breaking the kiss, Jillian held up a finger, signaling for Jason to wait.

She quickly moved off Jason’s lap and bed, walking over to the window and pulling open the blinds fully to let in more moonlight. She wanted him to see what came next. Jillian looked outside for a moment, smiling and taking in the beauty of the stars looking down on her.

She turned back to Jason, wiping her face of tears with her sleeve before reaching down to grab the hem of her hoodie. Slowly lifting the fabric. First a pair of skimpy purple lace panties were revealed, followed by a matching see-through bra that clung to her chest. Then a piece of sheer fabric that hung over the outfit fell to just barely hide her body as she stood there in the negligee. In the moonlit room, Jason could just barely make out the outlines of her hard nipples under the bra that was more for show than support. The lacy panties were a size too small, and they hugged her wide hips, the string waistband sinking into the plump flesh of her hips, turning him on almost instantly. Pulling out her hair tie and running her fingers through her hair, she let it fall loosely around her. The pale glow of her skin catching the moonlight as she stared at him like a predator.

Jason sat there, completely awestruck by Jillian’s appearance, as his cock surged to life under the blanket. She looked absolutely stunning standing before him. He never once imagined finding himself in this situation, yet here he was, sitting naked under the covers while Jillian Lins stood in front of him in sexy underwear. His desire was undeniable, evident by the way the blanket tented in his lap.

She cleared her throat softly, breaking his trance.

“So... do you like it?” she asked, a hint of shyness in her voice, but a small smile flashed on her lips as she glanced down at his erection. Not bothering to explain that she borrowed the outfit from her mother, like most of the fancy clothes she showed him.

He could only nod dumbly at first, blinking hard as he tried to get control of his senses.

“Uhhh.” Clearing his throat, he lifted his knee to hide his arousal from showing under the blanket.

“I do…you look... really good," was all he managed to say.

Jillian raised an eyebrow at his response, her lips giving a small pout at him hiding his erection.

“Just good?” she teased, giggling as she moved closer to the bed.

“No, I mean yes, but not just good. You look awesome. No wait! Fuck.” Jason fumbled his words badly. All the elegant prose from earlier gone as the blood that helped his brain function was directed to a different head at the moment. Jillian just giggled cutely at his reaction and flashed him a smile.

“Relax, it’s alright, I like good, I can tell you like it in, mmm other ways. Now, why don’t you show me rather than tell me?” She cooed, stepping forward, reaching out and slowly pulling the blanket away from his lap.

It was clear that the time for talk was over. Her hungry eyes moved from his face to his lap. At first, he held onto the blanket but gave it up after the second tug, letting the blanket slide off his lap. His crotch was slowly exposed, and his girthy cock fell back as it was freed from the covers. She let out a light gasp when she saw he wasn’t wearing underwear.

"Oh, fuck…” her words were full of lust as she wet her lips staring directly at his dick.

“Well, look at that... Were you naked waiting for me?” she teased, tossing the blanket aside, leaving Jason fully exposed. Climbing onto the bed, she locked eyes with Jason.

“Ummm, actually I…” He paused, debating in his head for a moment as she looked at him with an adorable look of curiosity.

“Should I tell her? Fuck, she is so cute right now…I have to be honest, though.” Even in this situation, Jason was still his same awkward self.

Clearing his throat, he continued. “I thought… I had locked the window.”

His words made Jillian freeze for a moment. “You thought you kept the window…locked.” Part of her felt a bit hurt at this news.

“Why would you tell me that?” She asked, frowning slightly. Jason did as well.

“It… didn’t feel right hiding it from you. I don’t like secrets, and I hate lying.” He explained, and Jillian sat back on her calves between his legs.

“If it means anything, I am truly thankful that it ended up not being locked.” He said softly, reaching a hand out for her to take if she still wanted it.

Jillian looked down at his hand and after a moment passed, she started laughing.

“That is… just so you, Jason.” She grinned up at him. “I am a little hurt you locked it, but I think I can figure out a way for you to make it up to me.” She said with a wink.

Leaning forward, she placed her hands atop of his thighs. Looking into his eyes, she licked her lips again.

“I want to show you what I can do for you, Jason. Will you let me?” She asked with some modesty.

She didn’t need to explain to him what she wanted. The way her eyes kept flicking down to his exposed erection like it was a magnet she had to pull her eyes away from made everything clear. Jason nodded only once, feeling his heart beating so hard it was almost painful.

Jillian's grin widened, letting her hand slide up his thigh. Reaching his crotch, she slowly started to trace the ridges and veins of his shaft. The soft pads of her fingers running along until she reached the tip of his penis. His whole body flinched slightly as the finger traced the flange of his tip. Moving her other hand in to explore his cock, running up and down the soft yet hard length. Wrapping both hands around it, both of her hands stacked on the base didn’t even reach his tip. Her breathing started to quicken as she felt him throb with excitement in her grasp.

“God Jason... I have been dreaming about this day. It’s such a nice shape and size, my heart is beating so fast.” She nearly moaned out, lowering herself as she laid down on her stomach between his legs as she played with him, looking fascinated.

Meanwhile, he was more than struggling to maintain his composure. “So I guess that means you ngh… like it?” he said, letting out small grunts as the effect of her touch caused him to twitch like crazy.

The way her fingers were teasing each one of his sensitive areas was like magic. It was so much different compared when he touched himself. Her hand slid down to the base of his length, moving to gently grasp his balls.

“Ah!” Jason suddenly let out a small yelp in surprise. Jillian pulled her hands away suddenly and looked up at him. She saw him clenching jaw slightly.

“Sorry, I tried to be gentle. Do you want me to stop?” she asked, concerned. He shook his head quickly.

“No... they are just… sensitive.” He almost went into an explanation of how he had taken a few low blows during a fight once. And how they have been overly sensitive ever since, but it seemed like a bad time.

Jillian nodded in understanding, slowly bringing her hand back to his shaft, making a mental note of that little detail for later.

“How about I just get to it for you?” she asked playfully. “Would you like to watch me struggle to fit your big fucking cock down my tight little throat?” Jason blinked, a bit caught off guard by her sudden dirty talk.

“Uh yes…I mean, if you want?” he said awkwardly, feeling immediate regret at his words. Smacking his forehead, he leaned his head back against the wall.

“Sorry…” he replied, a bit disheartened as he was ruining the moment.

It really wasn’t much of a surprise; Jillian knew he didn’t really have any experience in this kind of situation. Honestly, she found it kind of cute, how this big buff man could be so awkward when it came to sex and intimacy.

“Jason, it’s okay, just try to relax,” she reassured him. “You’re not the only one that’s going to enjoy this, I promise. I wasn’t lying when I first offered my mouth to you. I really love doing this.” She flashed him a grin, pushing herself up to rest her arms on his thighs. Her backside popped up like two smooth, freckled mountains, the lacy underwear straining to contain them.

Jillian moved her face closer to his crotch, her small hand wrapped around the base of his erection, guiding it to stand straight. Softly pressing her face against his length, taking in a deep breath through her nose. Her lips rubbed softly against the underside, her eyes never looking away from his. The overpowering scent of musk and pre-cum sent waves of pleasure through her body. “Oh fuck...ah” she moaned, closing her eyes as her warm breath against his sensitive flesh caused Jason to shudder.

Jillian opened her eyes again and looked up at him. Her face still lovingly pressed against his cock. “Jason... I want to please you. I want to service you, to show you just how much I crave you. Let me be your real first, for everything.” She said earnestly. The anticipation alone was making Jillian’s pussy drip with her arousal, soaking the lace panties. There wasn’t much to them, so they were quickly drenched, clinging to her labia.

Jason was gripping the sheets of his bed trying to keep from blowing his load prematurely. There was just so much happening and he was getting quickly overwhelmed with new sensations. Jillian’s hand pumped gently at the base, tenderly working the shaft while she pressed loud, smacking kisses to his frenulum and down his erection. His head was already swimming with pleasure when he finally realized what she said.

“Wha- you... want to be my first?” he asked in a daze.

She nodded, making her lips graze his tip a few times.

“Yeah... Y-you can be my first, Jill, Nngh” he said, still clenching the sheets of his bed, not sure where to put his hands. Jill smiled brightly.

“Thank you, Ja—” She paused, considering his nickname since he had called her Jill.

“Thank you, Jase... Oh, and if you need to cum, just go ahead anytime. I want your first time to be an explosion of pleasure right away. And don’t worry about where or when it happens,” she instructed, wetting her lips after she finished talking.

At that moment, Jason couldn’t help but wonder what he’d gotten himself into. The hunger she was looking up at him with was a little scary, but also the sexiest thing he’d ever seen as her lips pressed a kiss against the very tip of his dick. She was taking her time, enjoying teasing and worshiping his cock.

Jillian pushed herself up a little more and extended her tongue from her half open mouth and let it oh so slowly run around the edges of his tip. She stopped only so she could focus on teasing the most sensitive area on the underside.

His whole body tensed and he sucked in a sharp breath, his cock twitching in her grasp. The head swelling as a large bead of pre-cum dribbling out, which was quickly lapped up by her tongue. His unique flavor spread through her mouth and she shivered in a strange pleasure as the taste and scent filled her senses. Not wasting any time, she teased his opening with her tongue, wriggling against it like she was trying to coax out another bead of pre-cum for her to devour. She wasn’t disappointed as more slowly seeped out with a twitch as she serviced his dick with her tongue.

Pausing for just a moment, she placed her lips over the very tip of his cock. Reaching out, she grabbed his hand from the bed suddenly. Surprised, he opened his eyes to look down at what was happening. Letting go of the sheet, she moved his hand up to rest on the back of her neck, her lips never moving from his dick. Giving him a wink, she stared up at him as she very slowly and sensually let her plump lips slide over his girth, quickly wrapping over his entire cockhead. Giving him a firm suck, she eagerly lapped away another drop of his pre-cum.

“Oh fuck!” Jason breathed out hoarsely, his other hand still clutching the sheet as Jillian began to work her magic on him.

The suction combined with the assault of her tongue attacking his head mercilessly was enough to drive him crazy already. She let out a muffled laugh at his expression, her lips still wrapped around his large head. With a pop, she pulled off his dick and looked up at him with a mischievous grin, licking all his flavor from her lips.

“I love how you taste,” she said in a sultry comment. Pulling his cock back a little, she extended her tongue and licked it from base to tip, like she was proving she wasn’t lying.

Jason sucked in another sharp breath, leaning his head back against the wall, trying his best not to cum too early, even though she told him to do it whenever. The man inside him still resisted, even though he was more than ready to blow his load at any moment.

“That’s... good to hear, I guess,” he managed to say between breaths, the hand on the back of her neck, lightly pulling her head against his shaft as she licked. Exactly how she wanted him, too.

“Mmm, but now I want to show you what I can really do. You ready?” Jillian asked sweetly, wanting to take it slow for him, but she was champing at the bit to get his cock back in her mouth and down her throat.

“Sure, whatever you want, I guess,” Jason replied, a bit breathless, his continued uncertainty catching her attention.

“Jase, baby, I know this is all new for you, but you don’t have to be afraid to ask for what you want. This is a team effort, and I want you to be comfortable. I don’t mind teaching for now, but I’m sure you’ll figure it out as we go along. I know you are a fast learner,” she reassured him with a sweet smile. Her mind suddenly wandering, thinking about where she could get a sexy teacher’s outfit.

Jason nodded, but the first thought that went through his head was. “Baby?”

The pet name caught him unprepared. He understood her efforts to help him along, and he was grateful for it. He’d never experienced pleasure like this before. It was so far beyond what he could give himself. Back in college, he’d been scared off by a study he read about frequent masturbation lowering testosterone levels. Since then, for about six years, he hardly touched himself—maybe once or twice a month, if at all.

Even when he did, he found masturbation very difficult. Along with his poor body image, it just made him feel guilty, like he could be doing something more productive instead of debasing himself for a fleeting moment of pleasure. Porn had been a fleeting interest. Being a male, he enjoyed the eye candy, but going back to his other issue, it only served to frustrate him more.

Now that he had a beautiful redhead treating his cock like some sacred object that she was in love with, he found himself overly sensitive. His balls swelled with unspent cum, just waiting to be unleashed at the right time and stimulation.

Jillian was carefully watching his every expression as she teased him. She was desperate to know exactly what made him feel the most pleasure.

“I’m going to suck your cock for real now, Jason,” she warned with a playful smirk before sliding her lips over Jason’s head again, slowly taking the thick length deeper and deeper.

“Mmmph,” she let out a desperate moan as she attempted to push him down past the entrance of her throat.

Unlike the other man she had been with the most, this cock was big and thick, much more than she was used to. Still, Jillian was anything but a quitter and quite skilled at giving head. As she forced herself down further and further, feeling the pulsing girth stretch her throat. She managed to take him over halfway on her first try to accommodate his dick. She could feel her juices running down the inside of her thighs as her pussy reacted to the sensation.

“Ahh, fuck, Jill!” Jason moaned, gripping his sheet tightly and the hand on the back of her head trembled as he tried to resist pulling her down on reflex. As she went further down on him, his hips bucked lightly. The tight warmth squeezing his tip like a fist.

She got down just a bit more till she reached a point where her body convulsed, rejecting the foreign object in her throat, making her gag hard. Suddenly, all thoughts of sex vanished from his mind and concern flashed in Jason’s eyes from the sounds and her reaction.

“Shit, are you alright?” Jason’s tone was full of worry for her.

Quickly pulling her mouth off his cock, Jillian gasped for air, chest heaving, trying to catch her breath. Thick strands of saliva coated his cock and a large glob dangled from her lips.

“Fuck… it’s so huge,” she exclaimed, still trying to catch her breath.

“Jill, please be careful, don’t force yourself for my sake,” Jason intervened, but she shook her head slightly, and giving him a hard, determined stare.

“No fucking way, I’m not giving up that easily. You’re sweet, but I promise I’m alright. More than alright really, I love this, I’m just out of practice,” she grinned at him, saliva clinging to her lips and chin, making her lips look glossy.

Gathering up the thick strands of spit, she quickly covered his shaft with it. Using the saliva as lube, she stroked his entire length from tip to base. Her hand rotating and slipping so smoothly up and down.

Jason let out a long groan as the intensity of her hand teased his overly sensitive glans.

“Mmm, you sound so sexy when you moan.” She teased slightly, winking and making a kiss noise. When she had his cock sufficiently coated, she grinned.

“There we go, nice and lubed up.” She wasted no time in placing her mouth back on the tip of his cock. Her lips wrapping around and sliding down his length lovingly again. Sucking and bobbing up and down a few times for good measure.

Jason let out more moans of pleasure, as her wild red curls bounced with her head movement. As she opened her throat once more, his cock swiftly disappeared from view. He could feel the tightness of her throat enveloping him as she made every effort to take him deeper. Despite the resistance, she persisted, emitting moans of pleasure mingled with sounds of her gagging from the attempt. The tightness lovingly squeezing his cock, caused him to let out another strained groan. His whole body clenched as he barely resisted cumming down her throat.

Her legs shuddered in ecstasy as she managed to take about three-quarters of him this time. Just that much felt like he was fucking her stomach already. Her eyes rolled back in her head and her body started to convulse again as she eased him out this time. The underside of his dick grazing against her throat and past her saliva coated lips, eliciting another sharp intake of breath from him.

“I need your help, I can’t do this alone,” she said suddenly, gasping for air.

Tears had started to stream down her face from the effort, it was quite a sight as she looked to Jason for support. Her face had become a ragged mess of ecstasy and saliva.

“What do you need me to do?” Jason asked, glancing down at her, his own expression rather twisted by the pleasure.

“Just push to the back of my head when I start struggling,” she explained, making his eyes widened at her request.

Did she really want him to push it even deeper?

“That… sounds kinda intense. You don’t have to go that far for me, I have already almost cum several times. it’s unnecessary,” he protested.

“You don’t get it! I really fucking want to take the whole thing,” she insisted, a crazed look in her eyes.

“I want to feel your cock all the way down my throat. My lips wrapped around your base, my nose buried in your crotch. Nngh, fuck just thinking about it gets me so wet. Please, Jason. Also, I thought I told you to just cum whenever.” She pleaded, then scolded him.

One of her hands was still pumping his slick, hard shaft expertly as they talked. “Okay ahg… fuck that feels good… I don’t think I will last another attempt, anyway. I felt like I was about to cum when you were pulling off last time,” he warned, but she just grinned at him.

“Perfect, if you can, shoot your load down my throat,” she said with a wicked grin, licking his flavor from her lips.

Jason just couldn’t understand what was going through this girl’s head right now. “As long as she is happy I guess,” he thought.

Once she caught her breath, Jillian eagerly went back to shoving his cock down her throat. She took him into her mouth again, sliding up and down a few times like before. Then roughly shoved him halfway down her throat which seemed to be acclimating to the feeling after so long. It made him groan loudly as she brought Jason to the very edge of his climax. She then pushed even deeper, this time without as much trouble.

Her piercing blue eyes looked up at him the entire time. As she reached the point where she struggled to go further without his help, her watery eyes silently begged for help. If he wasn’t so focused on holding back his orgasm, he would have hesitated more. But he did as he was asked and reached his other hand down to grab the back of her head and pulled her head down. Initially, there was a bit of resistance, but she quickly adjusted and was finally past the last barrier. Her face was buried into his trim pubic hair, emitting muffled moans of intense pleasure.

Shoving her free hand down between her legs and under her panties, she attacked her drenched lips. Thighs already overly sticky from how much she had leaked out. She found her clit with ease, swollen and hyper sensitive as it was. Her legs trembled as her tongue extended and lapped against his balls as much as she could.

Jason tangled his fingers in Jillian’s vibrant red curls, pushing her down even harder, making Jillian’s eyes roll back in her head. Releasing an unintentionally prolonged groan of pleasure. “Ahhhg fuck, I’m cu-...” His words trailed off as the sensations of her mouth, throat, and tongue sent waves of ecstasy through his body. His balls tightened against his body and he grit his teeth in agonizing bliss.

Sensing his impending climax, Jillian pulled back a little before shoving her mouth back down on him. It was all Jason could take and his release exploded deep inside her. Hot, thick ropes of stored cum pulsed out straight into her stomach. Jason grit his teeth, trying not to let his voice get too loud as he moaned in release.

With each spurt he gave, it sent tremors through her body, accompanied by delighted moans of pleasure as her legs quivered. Teasing and pinching her clit, she felt her whole body pulse as her pussy let loose a torrent of girl cum that spilled from her quivering entrance. She quickly started to withdraw, wanting to catch the tail end of his release. He delivered a few more final spurts of cum, which she openly and eagerly accepted into her mouth. Letting the pearly white fluid coat her tongue.

With a mischievous glint in her eyes, she gazed up at him giving his tip one last hard suck trying to get every drop of the precious seed out. She then tenderly kissed his cock. Closing her eyes, she let out a loud gulp. Every last drop of his seed slipped down her slender throat. She out one last sigh of contentment, smiling happily as she did.

“Mmm, thank you.” She murmured, licking her lips clean, savoring the moment.

Jason leaned back against the wall, breathing heavily after being completely drained by Jillian’s skillful mouth and throat. When she said that she wanted him to finish down her throat, he assumed she was doing it to avoid the taste. But she pulled back intentionally to take some into her mouth and derived a strange pleasure from sucking the last of his cum into her mouth. He felt himself twitch in arousal at the image, even though he had just spent every drop he had saved.

“Fuck…I have never cum that hard… in my life.” he murmured, unable to articulate much else as he closed his eyes and relaxed his grip on her hair, letting his hands fall to the side.

Once he regained some senses he couldn’t help but chuckle a little.

“Did you really thank me for sucking my dick?” he asked with a smile, opening his eyes to look down at her again. She was still lightly caressing his slowly softening dick.

“Absolutely,” she answered with a cheeky grin.

“I appreciate you for opening up to me and giving me a chance.” Her hands moved from his dick and traced along his legs. She pushed herself up, moving to straddle his lap once more. The sticky feeling of her thighs against his wasn’t the most pleasant, but he overlooked it for now. He was in a very accepting mood right now. Their eyes met as she sat up on her knees to get more on eye level with him.

“For accepting me for who I am… And letting me be your first,” she added teasingly, but her tone tinged with sincerity.

“Jill...” He whispered.

“Yeah?” She replied softly, leaning in and planting a few kisses on his neck. He was about to say something, but then stopped himself.

“Don’t overthink things. Just be happy for a fucking second, you idiot!” Jason scolded himself inwardly, shaking his head at her.

“Forget it. It’s a stupid thought. But honestly, that was amazing. I came... a ton.” He expressed and Jillian giggled a little, nuzzling and pecking his neck a bit more firmly.

“Mmmhmm, I came as well when you shot down my throat.” Her words hummed against his neck. Pausing, she moved closer and whispered in his ear, “Want to feel how soaked you made me again?” Giving his earlobe a playful nibble, sending a shiver down his spine. Tonight was full of new sensations for him.

Swallowing loudly, Jason barely responded, “mmhmm.”

“Then go ahead, feel how soaked you got, my pussy.” Jillian let out a soft moan as she ran her tongue along the edge of his ear before sucking gently on the top.

His arms slowly reached around her and moved between her legs, finding her sticky thighs, sliding it between her legs. The warmth and wetness that greeted him as he touched the completely drenched panties was honestly shocking.

“Holy fuck…did you spring a leak?” he remarked, and she giggled softly again.

“Haha, shut up, It’s all your fault anyway. You did this to me,” she moaned again as his fingers pushed the panties aside and two fingers slid in between her thick labia for just a moment. When he suddenly pulled his hand away, much to her displeasure.

“Hey what gives? Why did you stop?” she asked with a pout, leaning back to look at him.

“I was too nervous to try it before…” he admitted quietly, bringing his fingers up to his mouth and sucking her juices off his digits.

Jillian looked at Jason, a bit stunned, as she watched his mouth suck the remnants of her juices off his fingers. Feeling a heat in her cheeks and her stomach grow at the sight. She spoke up again and her nerves were evident in her voice.

“What do you think?”

She had showered at home before she came over, but she still couldn’t shake the worry that he wouldn’t like how she tasted.

“Does it even matter!?” her mind panicked a little as it continued to race. “Fuck, I hope he likes it.” She wanted him to like everything about her. Which she knew was impossible, but still hoped for.

Jason took his time before answering, finally saying, “It tastes like…you. That’s the best I can describe it.”

Jillian gave him a puzzled look. “Well, I guess I’ll take that as a compliment?” They both chuckled softly.

“It’s not bad. There really isn’t much flavor to begin with, and it’s unique. It feels like one of those flavors. The more you have it, the more you like it,” Jason added with a smile.

“Then I guess I will have to let you taste it more often.” With her worries gone, Jillian giggled a bit, then leaned in to kiss his cheek before resting her head on his shoulder.

“Hey, Jase?”

“Yeah, Jill?” he responded softly to her whispered question.

There was a moment of hesitation before she asked, “Is it okay to feel this happy?” Her words were tinged with a hint of worry.

Jason paused for a moment, pondering what to say.

“I…I think so.. Everyone deserves a shot at happiness, don’t they? At least once in their lives. But if you are asking me, I feel happy…knowing that you are…is that weird?” He said, rambling a little. Jillian nestled closer to him, burying her face in his neck.

“You are... happy, because I am?” There was a long pause before she answered his question. “No… It’s not weird.” Her voice suddenly trembled slightly.

Feeling her shake slightly, he turned to look at her, but she was basically hiding her face in the crook of his neck.

“You okay?” he asked quietly, rubbing her back softly.

Jillian nodded her head against him. “I just… really hope I don’t wake up if this is a dream.” She sniffed a little like the tears had come back suddenly.

“I don’t think this is a dream, but if it is, I am glad we got to share it.” Jason said, wrapping his arms around her.

“I feel really…content right now... Nervous about what’s to come, but I still want to know what does,” he murmured, continuing to gently stroke her back and thigh.

“Me too. I’ve got this mix of nervousness and excitement that I can barely contain… umm, would it be alright to sleep here again tonight?” She asked uncertainly, as if unsure of his answer.

Jason just laughed. “Wouldn’t have it any other way,” he replied promptly, eliciting a soft giggle from her.

“Thank you,” planting a big noisy kiss on his cheek before slipping off his lap and out of bed.

Jason gave Jillian a strange look as she moved off the bed.

“Where are you going?” he asked, curious and maybe a little worried. “Was just joking about staying over.” The thought quickly shooting through his brain.

She glanced back at him with a soft chuckle. “Relax big guy, I am gonna go to the bathroom then get some water. My throat feels like it’s coated in glue, thanks to someone,” she said with a grin and a wink.

His eyes widened at her remark. “Oh... um, right, I mean I could go get it for you,” he offered. But she waved him off with a smile.

“Nah, don’t worry. I’ll be quick,” she assured him, winking again before slipping out of his room.

Jason let out a sigh and fell back onto his bed, staring up at the ceiling. Laying there completely naked and feeling more physically relaxed than he could ever remember being. As he closed his eyes, all he could see was her face—every expression, from cute to sad to angry to happy, then the most recent one of her eyes watering as she looked up at him with her lips wrapped around his cock flashed before his minds eye. The lust drunk look of happiness she gave him.

He felt himself become completely lost in thoughts of Jillian. Opening his eyes, he realized just how hooked he was on this girl.

“I’m in trouble.”