This Isn’t an E*otic Game?

I shouldn’t have cried.

I let my emotions get the better of me and ended up crying in front of Iomene.
That must have shocked her deeply, because ever since that moment, she hadn’t left my side.
It was suffocating.

No—
Trying to follow me to the bathroom was too much, wasn’t it?!
But what could I do?

I couldn’t exactly push away the future Saintess of the White Order and the daughter of the reigning Emperor just because I found it inconvenient.
I had no choice in the matter.
So, I spent my days with Iomene, teaching her basic knowledge while she clung to me.

The so-called emotional stabilization process was nothing more than a continuation of what I had already been doing at the Secluded Palace.
Playing with her, reading her books, staying with her while she slept, sharing meals—
“Together! Together!!”

Refusing her demands to bathe together.
“Together! Together!!”
Refusing her attempts to sleep in the same bed.

“Marriage! Marriage!”
And rejecting her relentless marriage proposals every time she brought it up.
Whenever I refused, she would sulk and glare at me, but the moment I stroked her head, her expression would instantly soften, and she’d start giggling again.

I taught her how to hold a fork and knife, how to interact with people, how to speak properly.
For things that were difficult for a man to teach—like bathing and personal hygiene—I had the female priests of the White Order handle them.
While spending time with Iomene, I also focused on preparing for my escape.
With the Emperor’s gift of ten kilograms of gold bars, my emergency funds were secured.

Once the unicorn-horn pendant was complete, I’d be able to supplement my mental energy for time-stopping magic.
Now, the only thing left was figuring out how to evade the Miracle of Pursuit.
“Evading the Miracle of Pursuit, you say?”

Iomene was always surrounded by combat priests and holy knights from the White Order.
And since she clung to me at all times, that meant I always had White Order priests nearby as well.
Since their Order specialized in dealing with worshippers of the Evil God and demon cultists, I figured they might have some knowledge on the matter.

So one day, I casually asked.
“The Miracle of Pursuit is inscribed directly onto the soul, making it impossible to avoid unless you use extremely powerful curses or black magic.”
“…Is that so?”

Shit.
Did that mean there was no way to avoid it?
“Yes. However, for all its power, it has significant drawbacks. It consumes an enormous amount of divine energy and is highly dependent on distance. Normally, anything farther than a kilometer away cannot be detected. Furthermore, in order to mark a soul, the caster must have seen the target with their own eyes.”

Thank God.
I wasn’t completely screwed after all!
“I didn’t realize it had those limitations.”

“If it were omnipotent, every single worshipper of the Evil God and demon cultist in the world would have been captured long ago. Because of the requirements of direct sight and distance restrictions, our combat priests and holy knights periodically patrol rural areas beyond the reach of state or church authority, as well as crime-ridden districts where malevolent energy is abundant, in order to track down previously sighted heretics.”
“You have my respect for your hard work.”
“It’s nothing compared to what you’ve done, Saint.”

A one-kilometer distance restriction.
And the fact that priests and holy knights only patrolled certain rural and crime-infested areas on a regular basis.
That meant I had to take those two factors into account when making my escape.

Which, in turn, meant—
I had to flee to a major city.
Not the countryside, not a crime-ridden slum—

A city with strict law enforcement, a massive population, and a sheer size so overwhelming that even multiple priests casting the Miracle of Pursuit simultaneously wouldn’t be able to find me easily.
And most importantly—
A city traditionally hostile to religion, where holy knights and priests wouldn’t dare to tread lightly.

I needed to pick a place that fit those criteria, rent a small house, change my appearance, and live as quietly as a mouse.
Let’s see…
A few names came to mind.

Which one should I choose?
As I was contemplating my options—
“Saint, Lady Erfa has come to see you.”

Erfa was here.
She used to visit me every day.
The fact that she hadn’t come for the past few days was more unusual than the fact that she was here now.

“I’d like to speak with her privately. Would you all step outside?”
At my request, the White Order’s guards and Imperial knights stationed around Iomene cautiously left the room.
Then, without much thought, I invited Erfa inside.

She entered my room as usual and turned to me with a—
…Wait.
She didn’t smile.

“Like! Like!!”
Iomene, as always, clung to my side.
But Erfa neither greeted me warmly nor blushed like she usually did.

She simply stared at Iomene with a cold, unreadable expression.
“Welcome, Erfa.”
I greeted her, but she remained silent.

Her eyes stayed locked onto Iomene.
“I greet Your Highness, the Princess.”
Erfa’s tone was polite—

But there was a clear distance in it, as if she were drawing a line.
Then, she finally turned her gaze toward me.
“…You’re treating the princess, I assume?”

Her voice was quiet, subdued.
I nodded.
“I’m assisting with her emotional stabilization. Once she’s settled, they’ll perform the procedure to restore her mind.”

“I see.”
Noticing Erfa’s stare, Iomene turned her eyes toward her as well.
Their gazes clashed in midair.

It felt like sparks were flying.
This…
This was jealousy.

“Hiss…”
Perhaps sensing something in Erfa’s blank expression, Iomene bared her teeth and let out a low growl.
I quickly stroked Iomene’s head to calm her down and stepped toward Erfa.

Iomene’s expression turned confused as I deliberately left her side.
But I couldn’t help it.
I had known Erfa far longer than I had known Iomene.

“The treatment will be finished by tomorrow. After that, the princess will return to the palace. Until then, she’s only staying by my side for medical reasons.”
At my words, Erfa’s frozen expression softened slightly.
Cautiously, she stepped closer.

“…I want to stay with you too.”
“…What?”
“I want to be by your side.”

Iomene let out another hiss.
I quickly stroked her head again.
At the same time, I took Erfa’s hand and led her to sit beside me on the bed.

It was obvious that she was jealous—
Because she leaned her head against my shoulder in an unmistakable display of possessiveness.
Thanks to her four arms, she was able to hold my hand while wrapping another arm around my waist and keeping a firm grip on my arm.

Iomene’s hissing reached its peak.
She even raised her nails, preparing to swipe at Erfa’s hands, but I caught her attack just in time.
I was disappearing soon.

I had to leave the Order, abandon this fake saint act, and live quietly, unnoticed.
But before that, I had to create as many happy memories as possible for Erfa.
I owed her that much.

Yet, Iomene, who had no idea about my circumstances, widened her eyes and stared at me with something close to betrayal.
Give me a break, Princess.
Once I disappear, Erfa will have to live without me for the rest of her life.

I need to make sure she’s as happy as possible before I go.
“You once told me to love myself more than I love you, didn’t you?”
“Yes, I did.”

“When you were fighting against the Evil God’s Fragment, I remembered that. That’s why I didn’t rush to save you. I believed in you. I knew you’d come back to me safely.”
Erfa fidgeted with her fingers.
Then, she pressed herself even closer to me.

A pleasant fragrance filled the air.
“I’m glad I listened to you. Just as I believed, you returned to me.”
I’m sorry.

The truth is, I shouldn’t have come back at all.
Now that I think about it, it really was strange.
That was the Evil God’s Fragment.

Not just some ordinary fragment—but the Evil God’s Fragment.
And yet, when it entered my body, it suddenly screamed…
Even during my studies in the White Order, I had never heard of such a thing.

Countless heroes, saints, and saintesses had suffered and died after coming into contact with the Fragment. Some even went mad and fell into corruption.
But I had never read about anyone who absorbed it, only for it to die inside them.
What the hell had happened?

I wanted to ask the scholars of the Order, but I couldn’t.
No doubt they’d start worshiping me even more.
Right now, the best thing I could do was let their attention on me cool down.

Just thinking about it pissed me off, so I stopped.
“I don’t doubt anymore. Even if you leave me for a while, I know now—you’ll always come back to me.”
Erfa smiled happily.

That only made me feel worse.
She had four arms, but that wasn’t a problem.
She was a woman who adored me, cherished me—and yet, in just a short while, I’d have to disappear from her life.

It wasn’t fair.
I didn’t just want to hold hands.
I didn’t just want to kiss.

I wanted more.
So much more.
I wanted everything with her.

But I couldn’t.
If I crossed that line, I wasn’t sure I’d be able to suppress my feelings anymore.
Damn it.

Let’s be honest—I liked Erfa.
How could I not?
She visited me every day, blushing at the sight of me, looking at me with those lovesick eyes.

Wasn’t it normal for me to feel this way?
I had already envisioned an entire life with her, a future where we got married and even had grandchildren.
But for her sake, I had to leave.

Lilia, you goddess of misfortune—
I hate you.
Why?

Why are you doing this to me?
Why?
“I’m nothing more than a staff. A tool you can use for stability and discard when the time comes.”

I stroked Erfa’s head the same way I did with Iomene.
“Don’t cling to me. Be happy when we’re together, but even if I disappear, live for yourself. Be strong. Be brilliant. Understood?”
Erfa nodded.

Then, she grabbed my face and pulled me toward her.
A kiss.
Soft.

Shy.
A kiss full of warmth.
Yet along with happiness, sorrow surged inside me.

It hurt.
It hurt so much.
Why?

Why, when we both loved each other, were we not allowed to be together?
I had to stop at just a kiss.
If we went further…

Leaving her would become unbearable.
The kiss stretched on.
I could feel Iomene frozen in shock, watching us.

After about thirty seconds, Erfa slowly pulled away, her expression melting with affection.
“…Saint.”
“…Erfa.”

“Um… so… that…”
She fumbled with something in her pocket, looking hesitant.
What was that?

…Did she have a condom in there or something?
Wait, do they even have condoms in this era?
If not for the goddess breathing down my neck, I would have been the one asking her first.

But right now, I had to draw the line.
I clenched my fists.
If I went any further—

I might not be able to stop myself.
I wasn’t some eunuch, okay?
I was perfectly healthy. Everything was in perfect working order.

(And yes, the prologue had been revised—so now, there was a scene where I tested all my skills on my own body right after getting them.)
And yet, here I was, forced to act like some damn monk.
“…I’m sorry, but you should go home now, Erfa.”

“What? B-But…”
“Princess Iomene’s treatment isn’t finished yet.”
Erfa looked visibly hurt.

It felt like my heart was being torn apart.
I’m not impotent.
I want this.

But I can’t.
If I give in, you will suffer because of me.
And I don’t want that.

You’ve been through too much. You deserve to be happy.
Right now, pushing you away is the only right choice.
Erfa lowered her head, looking ashamed and disappointed.

Then, without another word, she turned and left.
The moment she walked out, guilt and sorrow weighed heavily on me.
But before I had time to wallow in those feelings—

Iomene grabbed my head.
When I turned to her, her face was filled with fury.
“Kiss.”

Her tone was firm.
Like a demand.
“I want. Kiss.”

She pulled at my head, trying to bring me toward her.
I quickly stopped her.
“Iomene, don’t.”

“Kiss!! Me too!!”
For the first time, she shouted.
She was practically trying to pounce on me, forcing me to push her away.

“You—Y-You’re still sick! Your mind isn’t healed! If you’re not well, you can’t do this!!”
My desperate words made her freeze.
“…If not sick?”

Her eyes were serious.
“If not sick!! Then kiss?”
I forced a stiff smile.

Fine.
I’ll kiss you on the forehead, Iomene.
Just that.

“Alright. I promise.”
“Promise.”
She huffed.

“Promise.”
Once she was fully healed, she would go back to the palace.
She would live as an Imperial Princess.

As the Saintess of the White Order.
And I would be long gone, never to be seen again.
So, before I left—

I could at least give her a kiss on the forehead as a farewell.
That was all.
And you too, Iomene—

You have to live without me.
I will leave the church, stop being a fake saint, and live quietly like a mouse.
But before that, I must create as many good memories as possible for Erfa.

I owe her that much.
Yet Iomene, who knew nothing about my plans, only widened her eyes and looked at me with resentment.
Give me a break, Your Highness.

Soon, I will disappear, and Erfa will have to live without me forever.
I need to make her as happy as possible before I go.
"You once told me that I should love myself more than I love you, right?"

"Yes, I said that."
"When you were fighting the Evil God's Fragment, I remembered those words. That’s why I didn’t rush to save you. I believed in you. I knew you would return to me safe and sound."
Erfa fidgeted with her fingers.

Then she pressed even closer to me.
A pleasant fragrance drifted toward me.
"I'm glad I listened to you. Just as I believed—you came back to me."

I'm sorry.
But the truth is, I wasn’t supposed to return at all.
The more I think about it, the stranger it seems.

That was the Evil God's Fragment.
Not just any ordinary fragment—the Evil God's Fragment.
And yet, when it entered my body, it suddenly started screaming…

Even in all my studies at the White Order, I had never heard of such a thing.
Every hero, saint, and saintess who had come into contact with it had suffered, died in agony, or gone mad and fallen into corruption.
But I had never read about anyone who absorbed it only for it to suddenly die inside them.

What was the real reason behind this?
I wanted to ask the scholars of the Order, but I couldn’t.
If I did, they would only worship me even more.

Right now, the best thing I could do was let their attention on me fade.
Just thinking about it made me angry, so I decided to stop.
"I don’t doubt anymore. Even if you leave me for a while, I know now—you will always come back to me."

Erfa smiled happily.
That only made me feel worse.
She had four arms, but that didn’t matter.

She was a woman who cherished me, adored me—and yet, in just a short while, I would disappear from her life.
It wasn’t fair.
I didn’t just want to hold hands.

I didn’t just want to kiss.
I wanted more.
So much more.

I wanted everything with her.
But I couldn’t.
If I crossed that line, I might not be able to control myself anymore.

Damn it.
Let’s be honest—I liked Erfa.
How could I not?

She came to see me every day, her face flushing whenever she looked at me, her eyes filled with longing.
Wouldn’t it be strange if I didn’t feel this way?
I had already envisioned an entire life with her, a future where we got married and even had grandchildren.

But for her sake, I had to leave.
Lilia, you damn goddess—
I hate you.

Why?
Why are you doing this to me?
Why?

"I am nothing more than a staff. A tool for your stability, to be used for a moment and then discarded."
I stroked Erfa’s head the same way I did with Iomene.
"Don’t cling to me. Be happy when we are together, but even if I disappear, live for yourself. Be strong. Be brilliant. Do you understand?"

Erfa nodded.
Then, she grabbed my face and pulled me toward her.
A kiss.

Soft.
Shy.
A kiss full of warmth.

Yet along with happiness, sorrow surged inside me.
It hurt.
It hurt so much.

Why?
Why, when we both loved each other, were we not allowed to be together?
I had to stop at just a kiss.

If we went further…
Leaving her would become unbearable.
The kiss lasted long.

I could feel Iomene frozen in shock, watching us.
After about thirty seconds, Erfa slowly pulled away, her expression melting with affection.
"Saint…"

"…Erfa."
"Um… so… that…"
She fumbled with something in her pocket, looking hesitant.

What was that?
…Did she have a condom in there or something?
Wait, do they even have condoms in this era?

If not for the goddess breathing down my neck, I would have been the one asking her first.
But right now, I had to draw the line.
I clenched my fists.

If I went any further—
I might not be able to stop myself.
I wasn’t some eunuch, okay?

I was perfectly healthy. Everything was in perfect working order.
(And yes, the prologue had been revised—so now, there was a scene where I tested all my skills on my own body right after getting them.)
And yet, here I was, forced to act like some damn monk.

"…I’m sorry, but you should go home now, Erfa."
"What? B-But…"
"Princess Iomene’s treatment isn’t finished yet."

Erfa looked visibly hurt.
It felt like my heart was being torn apart.
I’m not impotent.

I want this.
But I can’t.
If I give in, you will suffer because of me.

And I don’t want that.
You’ve been through too much. You deserve to be happy.
Right now, pushing you away is the only right choice.

Erfa lowered her head, looking ashamed and disappointed.
Then, without another word, she turned and left.
The moment she walked out, guilt and sorrow weighed heavily on me.

But before I had time to wallow in those feelings—
Iomene grabbed my head.
When I turned to her, her face was filled with fury.

"Kiss."
Her tone was firm.
Like a demand.

"I want. Kiss."
She pulled at my head, trying to bring me toward her.
I quickly stopped her.

"Iomene, don’t."
"Kiss!! Me too!!"
For the first time, she shouted.

She was practically trying to pounce on me, forcing me to push her away.
"You—Y-You’re still sick! Your mind isn’t healed! If you’re not well, you can’t do this!!"
My desperate words made her freeze.

"…If not sick?"
Her eyes were serious.
"If not sick!! Then kiss?"

I forced a stiff smile.
Fine.
I’ll kiss you on the forehead, Iomene.

Just that.
"Alright. I promise."
"Promise."

She huffed.
"Promise."
Once she was fully healed, she would go back to the palace.

She would live as an Imperial Princess.
As the Saintess of the White Order.
And I would be long gone, never to be seen again.

So, before I left—
I could at least give her a kiss on the forehead as a farewell.
That was all.

And you too, Iomene—
You have to live without me.