This DCverse is Maddening

Albert was shaken out of his deep slumber by loud, hard banging on his thin door and the harsh voice that followed.

"Check out is in an hour, either pay for another night or get out."

His bleary eyes gazed at the yellow ceiling, struggling to fully recover from the shock. When he heard the heavy footsteps fade away into the distance, he decided not to try the man's patience.

It didn't take long for the teen to hurry on out of the room and check out. Sure the owner was gruff, but he couldn't deny how good the price was. He might have to wash these clothes after sleeping here but at least it was better than some alleyway.

The rising sun beat on his face as he breathed in the smoggy morning air. He wasn't sure what he should be doing before meeting up with the rest of the team. His rumbling stomach told him of his next actions. With a place already in mind, he weaved in between the crowding walk way of Gotham. After what felt like fifteen minutes, he came across the familiar storefront of 'Coffee Stains'.

Albert was a bit ashamed to admit it, but yesterday was his first time trying any from the store. Usually, the teen would only come here to work and chat with Jeremiah but never as a paying customer. It's never too late to start.

"Good morning kid," The old man smiled as he saw the youth enter his shop," I've only been open for an hour, nowhere near enough time to accumulate enough garbage yet."

"I'm up earlier than normal," He decided to ignore the subtle jab," And decided to try your slop."

"Slop eh?" Jeremiah quirked his brow," What do you think miss?"

It took Albert an embarrassing amount of time to realize that he wasn't the only person in the room. Looking over he locked gazes with amused blue-green eyes behind black rimmed glasses. The woman looked to be a couple years older than he was. She had a fairy muscular build, with black leggings emphasizing her shapely thighs. She wore an oversize green sweater which contrasted sharply with her bright copper locks.

"I think this slop," She slurped loudly," Is delicious."

"Oh my heart," He clutched at his heart with a sorrowful expression," I have never been so insulted in my life!"

The three devolved into chuckles by the end of the short interaction. Wiping a tear from the corner of his eye, the old man introduced the two.

"This here is Albert," He waved towards the teen,"He kind of works here."

"It's nice to meet you Albert," She extended her hand," My name is Barbara."

"Nice to meet you too."

He smiled as they shook, but internally he was screaming. This was Barbara Gordon aka Batgirl, or in the future, Oracle. She was known as a fierce fighter and even more dangerous analyst. Albert had no allusions that he had any chances of hiding his reaction to her, but hopefully she would just interpret his nervousness to who her father is. Spotting the quirk of her lips, he figured he had at least gotten that across. He turned his attention back to Jeremiah. The comics didn't do her justice, she was gorgeous.

"What do you suggest?" Albert asked the grinning old man.

"Hmm," He rubbed his chin," You seem like the caramel latte' type, and I got some muffins in the oven."

"That does sound good, I'll have that"

He nodded.

"Of course, I'll be just a moment."

And the old gentlemen disappeared into the back, leaving the two to their devices. Albert didn't have any intentions of opening a dialogue with the cape, in his opinion they were all trouble magnets. It would bring him nothing but misfortune if he tried to flirt with the Commissioner's daughter. But it seemed that his wish wouldn't be granted that day.

"Why don't you join me Albert?" She chuckled," I'm starting to feel awkward from you just standing there."

Accepting defeat, he sat in the chair before her. It was a bit surreal to be in front of one of his childhood crushes, maybe if he was lucky he would some of his others.

"Its my first time seeing anyone besides Old Man Jeremiah here," She took a sip of her steaming coffee," I thought of this place as my little get away."

"Same here," He nodded," I've never met any of the customers, given I come here when he's getting ready to close."

"Oh?" The red head leaned forward," What do you do?"

"Nothing much," The youth tried to ignore the close proximity," I just take out the trash every once and awhile."

"He does seem to be getting up there in years..." She nodded.

"I'll have you know I'm just as spry as I was twenty years ago."

Jeremiah interrupted, placing a steaming mug and muffin before Albert.

"Of course, of course," She smiled up at the man and just as she was prepared to continue their verbal spare, her phone chirped. With only a glance her mood took a slight drop. She sighed in defeat before standing up.

"I would love to continue our usual back and forth, but it seems like I'll need to babysit for a family friend." She then turned her attention back to the youth who was eating away at his breakfast," We should exchange phone numbers, I always need some more friends."

He felt a though he had unknowingly stepped in a spiderweb. Wasn't he suppose to be unattractive? There was no way their short conversation was anywhere near enough time for him to endear himself to her. The most likely reason? She wanted to keep an eye on him. He wasn't a fool, but he could always play it.

"Sure," He sheepishly handed over his and got hers in turn. After they were done, she turned and marched out of the shop. His eye couldn't help but be drawn to her toned legs, waving copper hair and her-

"Hey," The old man cuffed the back of his head,"If she catches you looking at her like that, you'll get your ass kicked. Plus, she's way out of your league."

Rubbing his head, he wouldn't disagree with Jeremiah's judgment. There were a lot of attractive woman in DC that could literally turn him inside out. They were like incredibly dangerous roses with knives, guns, fire, lasers, fists… I think you get it. At moment, Albert was a kin to prey to even the lowest level of capes and had no chance in hell with any of them. If he ever wanted to date in the first place, it would have to be with a non-cape.

"Thanks again for pointing me in the direction of that motel."

He thanked, and was met with a dismissive hand gesture.

"It's really no problem."

It wasn't too long for him to finish the breakfast and when Albert tried to pay the stubborn goat he was waved away. Exiting the warm shop, he allowed his feet to take him to his next destination. The urge to grow stronger had set root in his stomach. Who would've thought a pretty girl could inspire a boy with such conviction.

'The library it is…'

**********************************************************************************

"Good evening Miss Gordon."

"Hello Alfred, how are you doing?"

"Better with you here, miss."

"Did Bruce leave me anything to do while he's gone?"

"Yes of course, here you go miss."

The red head accepted the bulging vanilla folder with a sigh.

'There goes my week of relaxation, I get enough of this from my professors.'

But she wouldn't complain, Barbara normally wasn't available during this time. College was a bitch, and after a full nine months of rigorous study, an extended break like summer vacation was a real treat.

"Do you wish for me to guide you to your guest room?"

"No thanks, I think I got it."

"Of course miss, I will be in the kitchen cooking dinner. Please call if you need anything."

"Thank you Alfred."

She had been here plenty of times, so it didn't take long for her to pass by the familiar family portrait. The painting showcased three people. A tall handsome man with black hair standing behind a large red chair, a beautiful brown haired woman with kind eyes sat before the man and finally a young boy with black hair and sparkling eyes sat in her lap. Truly a beautiful family portrait. It would always be hard for her to compare the joyful boy in the painting and the dower man he had become in real life. She certainly hoped the future would be kinder to her than Bruce. (A/N: You poor thing….)

Entering into the nondescript door, she stood before a large lavish room with a heavenly looking king-size bed in the middle. She tried to tamp down on the spike of envying at the mere sight of the room, her father worked hard to keep over her head but it couldn't compare. Shrugging the backpack off of her pack, she vaulted over into the soft embrace. The bed encompassed her body in comfort and security. Feeling her body start to fade off into sleep, she shook herself off and much to her mind's consternation.

'Not doing that again until I'm ready to sleep..'

The red head then turned around and leaned her head back into the cloud like pillows with the vanilla folder in her lap.

'I should go check on Dick.'

Sighing, she got up out of bed and made her way down deeper and deeper into the mansion until the manufactured look soon became more like natural stone. She was grateful for the overhead lights otherwise, she would've first thought the billionaire was trying lead her somewhere untoward. Barbara could still remember their first real interaction three years ago, and her shock at his reveal to being Batman. It made a lot of sense in hindsight, there weren't a lot of people who could afford all the tech in the first place. How the others hadn't figured it out was mind boggling.

She was brought of her rumination by the echoing sound of someone's exclamations of effort. Followed by the sound of swooshing air and thumping. Getting a bad feeling, she hurried her meandering pace to a light jog. There were a lot of VERY dangerous objects in the Bat Cave, Bruce had a habit of taking trophies from the more iconic villains. Hell, there was even a god damned giant robotic dinosaur!

She wasn't ready to see the sight before her, when she finally passed to last corner.

"...You know what, I'm not going to ask"

"I-it's not what it looks like!"

The youth scrambled to explain himself. But it was far too late for that. Barbara could only sigh at the antics of Dick, he hadn't even waited a full twenty-four hours before pulling something like this? And now look what happened? The teen had been posing in front of a large mirror in exaggerated way. That wouldn't be so bad, cringey maybe, but he was currently wearing the Bat suit. It was obvious the suit to was too big for his lithe frame so it just hung off of him. Oh well, atleast it would be ammo for any future teasing.

As if he could see the future, his face paled and tried in earnest to vacate himself from the suit. His cheeks began heat up at the amusement evident in the red heads' sparkling blue-green eyes. Ignoring the embarrassed teen, she collapsed into a nearby chair and kicked her feet to begin to spin away. As she did so, she decided to look through the vanilla folder.

All in all, it was the same old. Make sure Blackgate wasn't broken into or out of. Keep an eye on a couple of quiet villains, status report on recent happening, and people of interest. That's where she paused as her gazed locked onto a familiar face.

'Albert Nelson...'

It then clicked in her head, no wonder he looked so familiar!

"Was Nelson involved in the recent Black Mask case?"

"Yeah," Dick tried and failed to peel the gray suit off,"Bruce has been obsessed with him since he came into the city. Weird if you ask me."

"Maybe…" She trailed off," I think I overheard my father talking about the case."

"Really?" His ears perked up," Any new information?"

"Apparently," She continued," They're going to try and extend his prison time by pulling in any witnesses they can."

"Oh," The teen slumped," I already knew that, check page 16."

'How did Bruce know this?!'

She knew there were some dirty cops who wouldn't blink an eye at selling information but still! From what she knew, her father had spoken to a few higher up and they shouldn't have leaked something like this easily. If Bruce knew, then other people wouldn't be too far behind.

"What's this?" She paused at a couple of photos.

"Oh that?" Dick had finally extricated himself from the gray prison,"We didn't know, but obviously something magical."

"And its slated to be given to Albert?"

"Yeah, don't look-"

"AH!"

A headache pierced through her brain, the words swirled at she had no choice but to look away.

"Yeah," He hedged away," Don't look at it for too long.."

"Gee thanks," She massaged her temples,"Are we sure he should get something like this?"

"Bruce is going to try and buy from him." The youth looked a bit disgruntle," I don't know why, its not like we haven't stolen before."

"You are aware I'm the commissioners daughter right?" She teased.

"I've personally seen you swipe Penguins' umbrella," Dick waved her away," You steal more than Bruce."

"I plead the fifth," She stuck her tongue out," But in all honesty, we haven't stolen from someone who hasn't broken the law yet."

"You sound like Bruce."

Barbara quirked her eyebrow, wondering why the teen was so set on stealing the book.

"Do we know what language its in?"

"No," The teen shook his head," He said he'll take it to Zatara to check it out."

"Could it be that Albert can read it?"

"We aren't sure, its a possibility."

"Then I'll try to ask him about it."

"Bruce said not to engage, as it would be to suspicious."

"I have his phone number s-"

"WHAT??!" He coughed into his fist," I mean, what?"

"I met him this morning at my usual coffee shop." She decided to ignore his outburst. It was obvious to even her that he had a bit of crush on her, but she could never really see him in that way. She had met him when he was thirteen and at the time he was an absolute brat. It would be nearly impossible to change her viewpoint on the boy. She just hoped Dick would outgrow his crush without her having to do anything. He still just looked at her, prodding her to continue. With a roll of her eyes, she did.

"From what I can tell, he basically works there."

"I thought you needed a signed form in order to work at that age?"

"...Dick, you're the same age," She rolled her eyes further," I think its more under the table than anything else."

"Is that enough?"

"No," The red head deadpanned," Illegally working is not enough to just take the book away. Why are you so set on doing so? It is his inheritance."

That caused him to pause, shifting from foot to foot he rubbed the back of neck sheepishly. She only stayed quiet. If he was going to continue on this path of being a hero, he couldn't afford to have tunnel vision. It could get people hurt, badly. And make a lot of enemies.

"I read his file you know?" He started," I didn't see it at first, but he's suspicious. There's nothing there. A blank slate. A complete mystery. It just reminds me of someone…"

"Who?"

She started to get a bad feeling about this conversation.

"The Joker…"

Barbara gasped in horror.

"You can't mean to think…"

"Yes," He sighed," I get the feeling if I got my own Joker then Albert would be his origin story.."

Instead of immediately shooting down his concerns, she began to think more deeply into this. It was true that no one knew who the Joker really was. No name, family or history. He just appeared in Gotham and reigned hell for years. If Dick thought that Albert could something similair…

"I met him," She ignored his stink eye," I spoke to him and not just read a file. He doesn't seem like the type. To me, he just seems lost."

"...I can see it."

He disgruntled.

"I think if we can push him along the right path," The red head continued after a beat," Then maybe we'll just have a normal citizen, if not an ally."

"He won't be normal," The youth snorted," He seems to be more of a private investigator, none of them are normal."

"That might be true," She agreed to the point,"Then it wouldn't hurt to have PI in our pocket."

"Fine."

Barbara could tell it would take him awhile to just see Albert as just another future villain, but even she knew that to compare him to a second coming of the Joker was a step too far. It wasn't a fair comparison. The orphan hadn't done anything to warrant such a reaction and she would be speaking to Bruce about passing down his paranoia to Dick.

She would try to steer the young PI down the right path, this cit-no world didn't need anymore villains.