Theseus

“This makes my head hurt.” Joel grumbled. Everyone else sat around the floor of Ray’s quarters, confused and tired expressions all around. It was yet another unscheduled briefing after a successful salvage mission, predicated by my impossible story of my clone family and their psychic powers. We had planned to meet in the mess hall again, but I insisted we keep Ray apprised of the situation as well. Everyone needed to know what was happening.

I had avoided telling the others about our fated meeting until their work was finished, because I knew we both needed to rescue the captain of the Demitrius and to salvage as much as we could for the sake of our wallets. I firmly believed that we weren’t in danger of retaliation, and so I didn’t deem it crucial to bring it to their immediate attention. Aisling would definitely scold me over it later, but I trusted Lily, even in her despondent state, not to betray my trust.

Having an additional core module attached to my shell didn’t feel as invasive as I assumed it would be. The procedure didn’t feel like stapling someone else’s brain to my arm like I assumed it would. It was more like I just knew there was something in the cavity made by my missing compartment, like it had been replaced with an inert filler material. Mouse only attached the module to my life support system. It wasn’t physically networked to the rest of my shell any more than it absolutely had to be, so we didn’t clash over virtual territory. It reached out to me now and then, sending inquisitive queries and permission requests trying to establish a network through psionic resonance, but outside of comms pings, which were mostly just a repetitive check-in to notify me it couldn’t locate the rest of its ship, I refused. I was in complete control of Theseus and was happy to find that this other core could not find rhyme or reason to my system architecture.

“You’re not alone, Joel.” Aisling said with a tired groan. “This breaks... not just what we know about clones and psychics, but it draws the structure of reality itself into it. From what it sounds like, she doesn’t just foresee things that haven’t happened yet, but she has some limited control over making what she sees a reality if she’s in a position to make a related choice about it.”

“So... does Lily make these things she sees happen, then?” Mouse asked, looking just as puzzled as everyone else.

“Possibly?” I tried my best to sound confused myself in my synthesized voice. Expressing a range of emotions over the intercom was still a challenge. “I’m not exactly sure how causality works out here.”

“Right?” Aisling held her head in one hand. “If she didn’t show up as she saw it, would we have found the Demitrius? Would the Demitrius even be destroyed?”

“I don’t think she’s some kind of god dictating fate or anything.” I internally rolled my eyes at the thought. She certainly didn’t have that kind of agency over reality. “I doubt things would be this... tragic for her if she had that much control over everything.”

“Maybe it’s best we don’t think too hard on this one.” Ray mumbled from her bed, lying on her back while Doc examined her surgical stitches. “It might be we’re not meant to know. Maybe no one knows. Perhaps she doesn’t even understand the mechanisms of the universe she’s privy to.”

I nodded to myself. “It certainly seemed that way when I was talking to her. She only seemed to understand how it worked from a practical point of view. And even then, she doesn’t seem like she has understands the mechanisms of it very well.”

“If she’s telling the truth, that is.” Mouse mumbled. “Is there any chance she’s just making this up and they have some kind of tech that let them find us?”

“I don’t know what kind of technology would let her find a singular ship our size that’s not broadcasting its location in wild space. Twice.” Aisling shook her head. “That’s a long stretch, even for a company with secret sentient cloning tech. And if that was it, then they would have just shown up here in force, not try to pull some mind game on us. I really hate to admit it, but the most plausible answer we have is that Lily is actually a precognitive psychic. She can see the future and orchestrate events that haven’t happened yet. As ludicrous as it is, that’s our reality. I don’t see any way it could be anything else at this point.”

The room went silent as we all pondered the implication of that. Psionic resonance had been an important part of our scientific world for decades now, but this was the realm of science fiction. It was so far from what we expected to be real that we were all having trouble reconciling with it as fact. Even I, who had a few hours to contemplate my conversation with her first, was still trying to see if I could come up with some other explanation for my sister’s uncanny ability to find us in the infinite vastness of our solar system alone.

Aisling lifted her tablet and played through some of the recording of my conversation with Lily again, starting from the beginning.

“Like Meryll’s fucking twin...” Joel muttered as he leaned over Aisling’s shoulder to watch.

“They’re clones, Joel.” Shaw added condescendingly.

Aisling did her best to ignore the peanut gallery and moved on. “At least she broke out of their custody. That’s good. And you’re right, Meryll. I doubt she’s going back after that reveal. She’s got no reason to, other than maybe if she resigns herself to misery. She’s too hopeful for that, though. Girl’s naïve, but she’s not that gullible. She knows there’s no happiness to be found with them now.”

“You can tell all that for sure just from that video?” Joel asked.

“I make judgement calls like this all the time with a lot less time to think about it. You can tell a lot about people from their body language.” Aisling thumbed forward in the video. “Meryll got her curious the last time they talked, and she finally worked up the nerve to act on that, even if she wasn’t certain she was going to go through with anything. That says a lot. She was looking for a reason to rebel, even if she wasn’t conscious of it. You definitely gave her a really good reason. And she definitely had to use her ability to orchestrate whatever circumstances let her be here, so this isn’t an accident.”

The video played the part where she described our sisters. “Take notes on this part, Meryll. Cassandra, she’s the crazy one that screwed with your head, right?”

I nodded into the void. “Yeah. She’s... scary.”

“Well, according to Lily, she’s telekinetic. Which makes sense for the log Fuller gave us. It would explain how she could hold the doors shut while she murdered her creator. It’s something we’ll have to keep in mind if we ever come face to face with her.” Aisling mumbled to herself. “Grace, that’s a name we haven’t heard them mention until now. Control of electricity...”

“Like what Meryll does? I thought that was a normal core thing?” Joel asked.

“No, I don’t think I can control electricity.” I admitted. “Well, maybe in a specific roundabout way? I control computers, and that’s just a function of the neural implant, not anything special as far as cores go. I’m just using software in a way that it’s been programmed to work ever since we started using machine cores.”

“And she started to mention a third name. Tara.” Aisling pointed out.

I’d been really preoccupied with the emotional weight of the conversation, but it was a strange reaction; there was no denying that. “Yeah. I thought that was bizarre, too, looking back on it. The way she looked when she started talking about her, it’s like she surprised herself with what she said... and then just... forgot about it and moved on. Like she didn’t realize she said anything about it in the first place.”

“She also stopped talking about the other units after that.” Aisling paused the video and took a moment to ponder the lost expression on Lily’s face in that moment. “I wonder if she has some kind of mental programming preventing her from speaking about the project at length.”

“But she continued on to talk about herself a lot.” I gave a frustrated hum. “What if it’s Tara specifically? What if they want to keep what she can do a secret? So much so that they gave Lily some kind of hypnotic short circuit or something?”

“Practical hypnotic programming like that is mostly bunk.” Doc finally spoke up, looking away from Ray’s scarred abdomen. “But we’re a bit beyond science now, aren’t we? If that were the case, I wonder if you’d be able to tell us if you knew. If they gave such a suggestion to Lily, it’s probably in all the Arthausen Units.”

“We’ve never seen Meryll seize up like this, though. She’s just forgotten ‘cause she’s an amnesiac...” Aisling gave a frustrated sigh. “There’s too much we don’t know. Let’s just agree that Tara must have an especially dangerous ability if they’d go to these lengths to hide it within their own ranks.”

“So if all of them have specific psychic abilities beyond what normal cores have, then what’s Meryll’s?” Mouse asked.

The room went silent, as if expecting an answer from me. But I had nothing. “As far as I know, I can’t do anything like that. I can’t move things with my mind, and I can’t see glimpses of the future. I can’t even imagine what other psychic abilities there are that I might have. Pyrokinesis? I haven’t exactly seen any open flames since I got here.”

“I would think that would fall under the same purview as controlling electricity, right? Controlling physical energy?” Aisling shook her head. “You definitely can’t read thoughts or anything like that. No offense, but you’re not that good at reading people. Ugh, this conversation gets more and more absurd by the minute.”

“I have to agree.” Shaw nodded. “I can’t believe that we have to have a serious discussion about superpowers.”

“Says the guy who can move metal with his mind.” I pointed out.

“That... is probably some kind of trick of magnetism in my implant.” Shaw crossed his arms, the liquid metal flying into his hand, where he configured it into a solid flat shape and fidgeted nervously with it. “I may admittedly not have a simple explanation for my tech, but it’s easy enough to imagine someone out there does. And it’s for sure my implant, not my brain itself. I don’t think there’s anyone who can scientifically explain being able to see the goddamned future, cybernetics or not.”

“What if Meryll just doesn’t have an ability?” Joel shrugged. “Could just be she’s defective.”

“Lily said that it’s because we have a psyche that Arthausen units get these abilities. I’ve definitely got one of those, so I must have something.” I thought for a few minutes, but nothing seemed obvious. Sure, I could operate computers remotely, but that was a normal function of machine cores given to me through the neural implant, right? It wasn’t an intrinsic thing my brain could do alone. Then again, I had no true memory of a time where I wasn’t implanted. “I guess I’ll have to experiment? There’s nothing else we can do right now on the subject of psychic abilities, so let’s just move on to the rest of the video.”

“Hmm... there is the matter of what she said earlier.” Aisling started “About the implant she has. Foundation has just now decided, after seeing Meryll operate a ship, to make an Arthausen Unit into a machine core. That means our hunch was correct. They haven’t neurologically implanted an Arthausen Unit until now.”

“Because they’re studying our psychic abilities instead.” I nodded to myself. “Maybe they didn’t want to risk us reacting like a normal human would to grafting a machine structure to their brain, since there’s only seven of us.”

“It is a near-certainly fatal process in baseline humans.” Doc nodded solemnly. “No one without a death wish has subjected themselves to it in a scientific setting for years now. Perhaps they believed that Arthausen units were too close to that to risk trying.”

“But since they know now that it’s safe, it’s not a matter of risking one of the seven anymore.” Aisling said. She nodded in agreement with my theory. “That makes sense.”

“Great, so we accidentally beta tested something they weren’t willing to try.” Joel rolled his eyes. “Go us.”

“They’d have figured it out, one way or another.” Mouse grumbled. “Corpos don’t care about people. Someone high up enough would have eventually insisted.”

“I don’t think they see us as people at all, Mouse.” I added. “Just assets.”

“Pretty sure that’s how they think of everyone.” Joel scoffed.

“I’d gladly spend all day bitching about our capitalist overlords, but let’s get through the rest of this video first.” Aisling said as she hit play again. “Lily says she’s seen multiple visions in which Meryll dies. And that’s what she’s trying to prevent. That’s her motivation.”

“Now that one sounds like bullshit.” Joel rolled his eyes.

“Nope. She’s legit. Lily is far from a manipulator, and everything about her demeanor here suggests she’s telling the truth.” Aisling watched the video carefully, rewinding it a few times to study Lily’s expressions. “Her only motives for any of this has been either to protect Meryll or to get herself implanted back into that simulation. I wish we could have asked her what the circumstances behind the ‘glimpses’ she saw of Meryll’s deaths were so we could try to avoid them, though.”

“I didn’t think to ask. I was a little preoccupied. And I honestly thought we’d have a lot more time to talk,” I admitted. I know I made at least a little bit of a misstep in information gathering there. I felt so certain that I could get Lily to agree to come on board once I pulled Foundation out from under her that I didn’t prioritize my questions very well. I just wanted her at my side. “And besides, I thought I had a good solution prepared already. She told me that she’s never seen a future where she joins us, so if she does, that invalidates all the ways she saw my corpse. Right?”

“Not necessarily.” Aisling certainly didn’t sound happy about it, but gave a resigned sigh on the matter. “From the sound of things, there are specific conditions that have to be fulfilled for her visions to come true. Those circumstances might not hinge on any of her other visions at all. So they could happen independently as long as the situation falls into place specifically as she sees them.”

“You’re making my head hurt again.” Joel grunted.

Aisling shook her head. “It would invalidate anything she saw that involved specifically either returning to Foundation or striking out on her own. So it’s not nothing.”

“So we would take her in, then?” Ray asked. “That sounds like a good idea. Practically and charitably. She obviously needs help, and having somebody on our side who can warn us about what’s coming would be... amazing.”

“I wonder how much Foundation’s already abused her ability for their own gain.” I added. “Let’s not be like that. But you’re right, if she wants to offer us her knowledge, that would be really helpful.”

“Just having her beyond Foundation’s reach would be a massive boon. If she comes around again, I wouldn’t be opposed to having a conversation with her myself to see if I want to let her join us.” Aisling nodded. “Sorry, Meryll, but family doesn’t mean a whole lot to me, so I want to vet her for myself.”

I had to wonder what she meant by that. It’s the first time I could remember Aisling even mentioning family, but apparently it was a sore subject for her. “I understand. I think you’d be pretty helpful for her to talk to, anyway. You’re good with that stuff.”

She gave a slow and thoughtful nod at my compliment. “Thanks. So we at least have a plan for that. That is, if she comes back. I’m sorry to say, Meryll, but you left her in a pretty poor state in the end. You said a lot of the right things, but at the very end, you probably should have taken a different angle with breaking the news to her. We wanted to have her somewhere she couldn’t just run away before you brought it up.”

“Sorry. I couldn’t think of any other way to convince her not to go back. Not in the moment, anyway. I guess I could have told her more about what it’s like living with you guys. I definitely didn’t want to make anything up, though. I’m not going to lie to her.”

“Lying would have been bad later down the line,” Aisling agreed. “And letting her go back to Foundation would mean she doesn’t likely get another chance to break out. She’d have a crew of handlers and a ship she’s tied to by then. I get why you went for it. There’s probably some other way you could have handled it, though. Just kept her talking and see what other options opened up. I don’t blame you for it, you handled it really well compared to last time. But we don’t know what state she’s in now. For all we know, she...” She pursed her lips and refused to continue.

“Yeah. I get it. She might have killed herself.” I’d considered the possibility while I was waiting for the others. And as much as I didn’t truly know Lily all that well, it seemed plausible that in the state I left her in, she may have committed suicide. I’m sure there were plenty of ways to do it on that ship. I’d just really hoped so far that it wouldn’t be the case. “But I have to hope that she’s still out there, just taking a few hours to herself before she comes back. I want to comfort her and try to make everything about this better for her. Give her a life worth living.”

“Well said.” Ray spoke up with a mild slur to her words. “I think she’d fit right in. Another lost lone wolf for us to bring into our pack.”

Aisling leaned over to see past Doc. “Is she high?”

Doc shrugged. “Little bit. I just dosed her.”

“I’m fine.” Ray slurred. “I’m perfectly fine, feeling great.”

“Because of the pain meds, yes.” Doc nodded.

“I think we’re done here. Meryll, are we out of range of the derelict yet?”

I nodded to myself again, a harmless habit I saw little reason to break. “We’re making headway out into wild space, and I can no longer detect the Demitrius. Should I fix our course back to Io yet?”

“Yeah, we should be good. If Lily is following us, we can’t exactly stop her from tracking where we’re going. Those ships are entirely too fast for us to outrun, even if we maxed out our engines, so we’ll just have to assume that if she’s still there, she’s going to be benign. Not like we have much of a choice. I’m sure she can arrange another destined encounter with us if she loses track.” Aisling threw up her arms into an exasperated shrug. “Because that’s just a thing she can do, I guess.”

“I hate all of this,” Joel muttered. “At least we got some decent materials from that wreck.”

“Couple crates of unrefined platinum.” Mouse nodded. “Should be able to pay for getting the cargo bay repaired for real, at least.”

“Not to mention the arms. I think they’re leftovers from the rebellion.” Joel gave a small smile. “Might take a while to find a buyer for those, though.”

I was glad to hear the salvage was at least something we could count as a resounding success today. Returning my cargo bay to its intended functional form would be a relief, and it meant we could hopefully get back into the air quick after Io if we had to.

The crew slowly dispersed as the conversations drifted in several directions, Joel teasing Shaw about getting scared by something on the derelict, Aisling asking Mouse for updates on how well the adopted core module would hold in my systems, Doc consoling Ray into medicated rest. I stayed quiet, my own thoughts preoccupied by the one who I thought should be there with us. Lily. I wanted to help her. I wished I could speak with her again. Part of me knew I would someday soon. But I wanted to be by her side now. It hurt that she had to face this alone.