The Walls of Anamoor

Explaining my encounter with the goddess didn’t take long, there hadn’t been much to it really. We’d been falling off a cliff in a bus, then we got schwooped into her crazy realm and turned into our characters, told to help humanity fight evil and then off we were sent. Pretty standard shit as far as gods went, always throwing the heroes into the shit with minimal information.

“That’s all she said, really?” Bassi asked incredulously, flopping back into the pillow. Then she sat up and frowned down at it. “We need to hang out in my room more, my bed is better.”

“Why don’t we just head up there then?” I asked, nodding upstairs and vaguely in the direction of her room.

With a long sigh, she rubbed at her eyes and gave me a sidelong look, staying silent for several long seconds as she thought. Finally she shrugged, “Alright, let’s go then.”

So we did, although we moved very stealthily as we went about it. Still trying to hide what was happening between us, I guess.

Throwing most of our clothing off when we arrive, keeping just our shirts on, we hurriedly dove beneath the covers. She’d been right, her bed was much comfier than mine. Perks of being the boss, I guess. I snuggled in under the sheets and blankets, appropriating a spare pillow in the process so I had something to hug.

Bassi watched and smiled from her side of the bed. "The idea that you could have ever been a man is so ridiculous. Look at you! By their standards, you'd be ridiculed and the size of your manhood would have been called into question."

I blushed at the implication that I acted feminine. I think I liked that? Yeah, I definitely liked that. She was right too, at least by the standards of what men were supposedly supposed to be. Sure, I was tough and strong, good at fighting and stuff. But apparently, I also cried and liked to cuddle a pillow when I was in bed. Then there was the thing about my manhood… "Well, they'd be right. It wasn't very big."

That had her laughing outright, her hand seeking me out under the covers, just touching my arm for a moment. She seemed to touch me a lot when I made her laugh.

"Tell me about your old life," she said, retracting her hand and getting comfy.

“There isn’t much to say,” I said, trying to keep the melancholy from my tone. “I grew up in a middle class family, had a home, parents, all that stuff.”

“Middle class?” she asked, looking both confused and intrigued.

Ah, shit… that wasn’t really a thing here. The middle class hadn’t really existed on earth all that long either, at least in the western cultures I was familiar with. “Highly skilled craftsmen would be the closest analogue, I think. In terms of wealth, they’re the kind of people that sit right on the average.”

“Hence why you were able to take up art as a profession,” she nodded, thoughts whirling behind those pretty eyes of hers. I don’t know why I focused so much on them, maybe it was the way it felt like I was really connecting with her when we locked gazes. Like I was staring at her, not just the vehicle she used to get through life.

“The world I came from is… paradise compared to this one,” I sighed, then got a nose full of her scent from the pillow. Closing my eyes for a moment, I hid the resulting smile that pulled at my lips. I still liked this world more. It had Bassi in it.

Regardless of my personal preferences though, I explained earth to her in broad strokes, from our technology to the lack of magic. I went through a little of its history and culture as well, at least the parts I knew.

Her gaze was piercing as she listened to me, and when I finished, she asked, "Why do I get the feeling that you didn't enjoy it there, even with all these wonders you are describing?"

I gave a hollow laugh. “I didn’t enjoy it, that’s why,” I told her truthfully, then paused, my mouth hanging partly open as I considered my next words. “Being here with everyone in the slate snakes… it’s the first time I’ve known real love, I guess.”

“Oh, I’m not—“ Bassi blurted quickly, cheeks flushing pink.

I was just as quick to interrupt her, “No, no not us, you dingus! I mean everyone here, this little family we call the slate snakes. We care about each other here. It’s wonderful, I’m actually so happy here, even with the greater threat of pain and danger.”

“O-oh… yeah,” she nodded, breaking eye contact to stare almost bashfully down at the sheets. Fucking adorable. “I’ve tried to foster a sense of… family, as you put it. Thieves are notoriously bad at following orders, after all, but if the order comes from a friend, someone they care about… well there’s a good chance they will try their level best to actually get the job done.”

“Smart,” I said with a smile, and this time it was me who reached out to pull her chin back up. “And for the record, I do care about you too Bassi. What you did for me today, or are doing by inviting me up to spend time, I’d do that for you any and every day. You’re a wonderful friend.”

Friend. Why did that word sound like a big fat lie? It’s what we were, what we defined as the relationship between us. Was this just how being friends worked between two women? Or… well, a woman and something close to it.

“Glad to know I’m appreciated,” she replied as my mind leapt off the deep end, her lips quirking into a return smile. Goodness, that smile… mine had faltered for a moment, but seeing her happy, it had me happy all over again.

We lay there and stared at each other for almost a minute, just non stop smiling at each other. My heart felt light in that moment, knowing that I was cared for by other people, but… specifically her. Bassi’s reaction when she thought I’d said she was in love with me had been kinda cute too, with how normally strong and assured she was.

For a moment, a moment in which I gave in to weakness, I entertained the idea of us as something other than a joke. Actually being in a relationship with Bassi, falling in love with her, and her with me.

Emotion filled me, a firehose torrent of confused yearning and desire. Images flashing through my head in a muddled mess, barely leaving me time to recover from one before the next hit me square in the gut.

I pictured shuffling forward right in this moment, cuddling into her arms as though they were my home, or waking up every day to her sleepy grumbles and refusal to move. I saw us kissing, not with lust, but for the simple pleasure of intimacy between lovers.

The sheer unbridled want I felt in that moment brought tears to my eyes. A sob escaped me before I could catch it, and Bassi was shuffling forward to pull me into the hug I’d just been fantasising about.

“What’s wrong Mist, what’s wrong?” she cooed softly, pulling me closer and running her hands comfortingly down my back.

“I… I don’t know,” I lied as I scrambled to shove all those emotions back into whatever crevice of my mind they had just tumbled out of. Crap, this was not good, this was really, really not good!

Hand drifting up from my back to nestle in my hair, she began to gently scratch at my scalp in an attempt to comfort me. “Well, I’m here.”

My heart surged at the touch and I clenched my eyelids shut as hard as I could. We’d agreed not to go any further than pleasure and friendship, what the hell was my heart doing? I didn’t want this! I didn’t want to fall for her, that would ruin everything! Not just between us, but it would make things awkward with the whole of the slate snakes.

Even with my mind screaming that I stop, I gave in to the deep need within me, returning the hug and nuzzling in close. I breathed her in, the smell and warmth of her calming me even as they were the source of my tears. Goddess, my life was about to get very hard and very complicated.

 

****

 

I woke up the next morning without Bassi next to me, but I could hear her nearby, speaking to someone. Dang it, why was she up? This was too early, she needed to come back to bed.

Groggily, I struggled my way silently out of bed and wobbled over to a gap in the partitions that separated her sleeping quarters from her office. “Bassi?” I asked, rubbing at my eyes to clear them of the detritus of sleep.

“Well, well, well,” Singer’s low, rough voice chortled. “I see that I was right to send you Mist’s way last night, eh Bassi?”

I blinked, gaping over at Singer who sat on the other side of Bassi’s desk. Opposite her, wearing pants but still the shirt she’d slept in, Bassi leaned forward and groaned. “Mist…”

“Sorry!” I squeaked, hastily rushing back behind the partition.

“She’s already seen you, you twit,” Bassi said, annoyance and amusement dancing a merry jig in her tone. “Put some pants on and come back out, this concerns you anyway.”

“Okay,” I mumbled as embarrassment burned my cheeks.

Pants on, I wandered back out there and dragged a chair out of the corner to sit on, avoiding both of their gazes while I did so.

“Are we just, not going to talk about this?” Singer asked, still sounding very pleased with herself, and I think maybe us? I had no idea why she’d be happy with us though, for what she’d seen anyway… goddess, I don’t know.

“I provided companionship and comfort, she was hurting. There was nothing more to it,” Bassi said stiffly, briefly meeting my eyes before we both jerked and looked away.

“Riiight,” Singer drawled, clearly not buying it, even though this time, that had been exactly what happened. “And obviously she needed to be without her breeches to receive that comfort.”

Staring down into my lap, I took a deep breath. No, I was not a silly meek boy anymore. I was confident in who I was now… mostly, and I was going to damn well act like it! I looked up, meeting the pesky mage’s eyes with my own. “I mean, sleeping in pants is pretty uncomfortable.”

“That it is,” she nodded, rolling her eyes but otherwise declining to prod us further on the topic.

Time to be a cheeky little shit.

“Normally you’d be right though,” I shrugged, giving Bassi a grin and nudging her with my foot under the desk. “Bassi is a very good friend, talented, even. Those fingers...”

The leader of the slate snakes gaped at me in surprise, mouth falling open. Singer on the other hand, was grinning.

Gentling my tone, I reached out and put a hand down on Bassi’s. “We’re adults, it’s okay if we enjoy ourselves and each other. There’s no need to get all… anxious about it.”

“She’s right, you know,” Singer said in agreement. “I know I enjoy my Dancer quite a bit.”

“We’re not like you and Dancer though!” Bassi exclaimed in a hoarse voice.

“That’s fine,” the slight blonde woman shrugged. “You two can be however you want to be. Purely sexual or the opposite. No need to hide it, especially not here. Don’t be like Lark and Swipe, those two are exasperating in the extreme.”

“I just… I don’t… I can’t do love,” Bassi told us, voice cracking with the sound of painful memory.

Gah, damn it. I’d fucked up, Bassi was definitely not ready for people to know. Standing up, I moved to sit on the arm of her chair and put my arms around her, hugging her tight to my side. “Goddess, we're all just a bunch of broken people, huh?” I commented.

“Aye,” Singer nodded, giving me an approving look. “I have parental issues, if that helps. My magic manifested early and that was the end of any love I got from the two that made me.”

“And I have massive issues with my gender,” I said with a smile down at Bassi. “And you were hurt some how or way, by someone you loved. If I had to take a guess.”

Oh, those eyes. Staring up at me with such a soulful look. How could someone so strong, so tough, confident and deadly be so vulnerable and small at the same time. My heart throbbed with dangerous affection, but I let it. I would be far better at comforting her if I let the feelings in.

“You’re right,” she whispered in a tone laden with sorrow, still holding my gaze. “She was full fae, I am half… I wasn’t good enough, a dirty half blood.”

“Too bad for her,” I shrugged, smoothing my friend’s hair out with tender strokes. “She fucked up, you’re amazing.”

“Yes, well… she broke me in the process,” Bassi murmured, then closed her eyes and took a long, deep breath. From one moment to the next, she became hard again, the vulnerability disappearing before our eyes. When she spoke next, it was with calm gratitude. “Thank you Mist, thank you Singer. We should really get back to the task at hand though. As you’ve mentioned in the past, Mist… such thoughts as those are best saved for the comfort of night and the touch of sleep.”

“Pretty words,” I smiled, seating myself back in my chair. “I’ll make sure I’m there to help you when sleep starts getting handsy then. That’s my job after all.”

She threw me a glare. I grinned.