NOVEL WEB Part 6: The Real You
As Sakuya returned to the mansion and headed back into the tunnels, she sighed. I greatly dislike asking Hakurei for help, and I'm sure Lady Remilia does as well, but at this stage, we have no other options. Also, her intuition is too sharp for our own good. When this is over, things might get messy. She shook her head. Never mind that for now, though. At least she's willing to help.
Sakuya made her way upstairs, and into the living room. "It is done, Milady."
Remilia was sitting on the couch, and Flandre was sitting on the opposite side, her face once again puffed up in a pout. Between the two, Meiling stood, her arms behind her back. "Welcome back, Sakuya." Remilia sighed, a hint of aggravation to her voice.
Sakuya glanced back and forth between Remilia and Flandre, and asked "Did I... miss something important, Milady?"
"No. I'm just having a talk with Flan. Please, sit." Remilia patted the couch next to her.
"Milady, I couldn't—"
"Just sit, Sakuya. It's fine, you've done enough for now."
After a moment of hesitation, Sakuya bowed. "Yes, Milady," She replied, taking a seat next to Remilia.
Remilia turned her gaze back to Flandre, and said, hopefully "I'm sorry Flan. I don't know how many more times I have to say it, but I am sorry. I never should have said those things, and I understand why you're upset and why you feel like you're stuck here." Flandre said nothing, still pouting with her arms crossed. "I promise, within the next few days, you should be able to come and go as you like once more. We've asked the Hakurei shrine maiden to help, and she's going to keep Meiling safe, okay?"
Flandre mumbled "Does she know about Meiling?"
"No, Flan. We didn't tell her anything. All she knows is that there's a dangerous youkai running around. Meiling's secret is safe."
"For now, Milady." Sakuya interrupted.
Remilia turned to look at Sakuya. "I'm sorry?"
"I was successful in enlisting Hakurei's help, but there's something I'd like to discuss with you, privately." She said, glancing at Flan.
"You're not gonna make me go away AGAIN, are you?!" Flan yelled. "That's not fair! I wanna know what's happening too!"
"Shhhhh, Flan. No, I'm not going to do that to you again." Remilia reassured her. To Sakuya, she said "I'm sorry, Sakuya, but at this time, Flandre deserves to know everything we know. It's the least I can do after how I acted."
"Very well, Milady." Sakuya took a deep breath, then continued "I fear that, when this whole affair is over, we may still have a problem."
"What problem?" Meiling spoke up.
"Unfortunately...Hakurei's intuition is far too sharp for us to simply walk away from this. Even as I spoke to her, I could feel her suspicion. She told me, up front, that after she takes care of the oomukade, she will demand the truth, all of it, from us. She knows that we're hiding something, but I don't believe she knows just what yet. However, I don't believe that matters. Even were we to lie, I doubt she would relent until we tell her everything."
"Damn it." Remilia growled. "Sometimes she's helpful, sometimes she's an agonizing thorn in our sides. We have to start thinking of something now, before the affair is finished, or when she does come calling, we'll have nothing to offer."
"About that, Milady." Sakuya sighed, knowing that what she was about to say wouldn't go over well. However, it still needed to be said, so she pressed on. "I don't think we should lie about Meiling any longer."
All eyes turned to Sakuya, and Meiling looked angry for the first time. "Excuse me?" She asked incredulously.
"Sakuya, what would possess you to say such a thing? That is the one thing we absolutely cannot do, at any cost." Remilia asked, concern on her face.
Seeing Meiling's reaction, Sakuya's heart sank slightly, but still she continued. "As you said, Milady, the shrine maiden's response is unpredictable — but that doesn't necessarily mean it would be negative. Hakurei comes in contact with any number of powerful gods and youkai on a regular basis, such as oni and tengu. There may be a good chance she doesn't care, and treats Meiling the same as any youkai—"
"I'm a DRAGON, Sakuya!" Meiling shot back, her voice beginning to rise. "I'm not some run-of-the-mill oni or tengu or even a god! My species is the most powerful and ancient one in existence, and you'd have us just reveal that to everyone?!"
"I —" Sakuya tried, feeling the situation beginning to spin out of control. "I fully understand that, Meiling, but you know how Hakurei is with other youkai, she regularly throws parties, some of which you've attended—"
"When I was masquerading as a regular youkai, Sakuya! Not as my real self! Not as a dragon, not as a divine being!" Meiling growled, advancing toward Sakuya.
Remilia stood up and warned "Meiling—"
"With all due respect, Milady, please stay out of this!" Meiling snapped sharply.
At this, Sakuya lost her patience. "How dare you speak to the Mistress in such a way! You are far out of line, control yourself!"
"SHUT UP, Sakuya!" Meiling screamed, a rainbow glow beginning to surround her.
Sakuya's eyes widened, and she took a step back."Wait. Wait, Meiling, please. I'm sorry." She stammered.
"Meiling! Stand down, that is a direct order!" Remilia yelled.
The rainbow glow around Meiling sharply intensified, and rainbow scales began to appear on her face. At this, Remilia's eyes widened, and she wanted to say something, but her chest tightened, and she couldn't seem to breathe or get the words out. Sweat began to trace down her face, and Remilia collapsed back onto the couch, scooting as far as she could away from Meiling.
Sakuya continued backing up, and tears of fear began to fill her eyes. "P-Please, Meiling, I'm sorry, forget what I said, please—"
"You want to put my life in danger?" Meiling roared, her voice gaining a deeper layer, as if two voices were speaking at once. "You want me to be revealed, to everyone?! To the gap youkai? To the hermit, to the gods?! How dare YOU suggest such a thing!" More scales began to emerge on Meiling's face, and her fingernails began to grow longer. "After all these years, out of all the time I've been faithful to this family, and to everyone in this household, you want me to sign my own DEATH WARRANT?!" Meiling bellowed, small horns beginning to emerge from her forehead.
"Meiling!" a voice shouted. Meiling turned, and saw Flandre's face, filled with fear, tears pouring down her cheeks. Meiling's eyes widened. "Please...Please, Meiling, stop! I don't like you like this. I don't want you to hurt Sakuya and Sis, I know you don't want to either, please, just please stop..." She whispered, struggling not to sob.
Meiling stared at Flandre, then looked down at her hand, seeing more scales erupt from her palm. She took another look around the room— at Remilia, who sat terrified in the corner of the couch. At Sakuya, whose eyes were filled with a deep, primal fear, tears streaming from her eyes, breathing heavily. "N-no...No. No, no wait. No, this isn't what I wanted." Meiling whispered. "Sakuya, please, I didn't mean to—"
As Meiling reached for Sakuya, she suddenly disappeared and reappeared further away, back pressed against the unlit hearth, watch still in hand. The glow around Meiling faded, and the scales and horns gradually shrunk and disappeared. "Everyone — I-I never wanted to hurt you, I didn't want to make you afraid, I just—" Her body trembled. With one more look at everyone's faces, her heart dropped like a stone, and she took a step back, before running away.
There was a long, unpleasant silence for a few minutes. Remilia was the first to speak, clutching her chest. "This fear... it hurts. I've never felt this before. I've never felt so weak and powerless. Sakuya-" She looked over at her maid, who had dropped her watch to the floor, and was staring, catatonic, at the ground, her head in her hands. Remilia felt sickness rising in her throat, and she quickly dashed off to the nearest bathroom.
Flandre remained right where she sat, and she stared in the direction Meiling had run off in. "Meiling, please...Don't do what I think you're going to do." She leapt over the back of the couch and ran as fast as she could, down the stairs to the underground tunnels.
Meiling was running as fast as her legs would carry her, away from the mansion, away from the Misty Lake, away from her home. What have I done? kept repeating in her mind, and she pushed herself to run faster, tears flying behind her. For the first time, she didn't know what to do or where to go. She had no idea what was next, and she didn't care. All she knew was that she had to get as far away from the people she loved as possible. For almost an hour, she ran, never stopping or slowing down. When she finally caught her breath, she saw that she had arrived at the bank of the Sanzu River. Slowly, as if in a trance, she began to walk towards the water's edge. After threatening everyone like that...terrifying everyone, even Flan... She thought, taking step after step.
"Woah there!" A voice called, briefly snapping her out of it. "You don't look dead! Best keep away from there!"
Meiling turned to see a woman standing a few meters away. Her hair was bright red, and two ornaments kept part of her hair up in pigtails. She wore a a blue vest with a white dress underneath, and around her waist was an obi with a coin in the center. In her hands, she carried a large scythe, its blade becoming wavier towards the point. As she approached Meiling, she whistled a cheerful tune.
"Komachi Onozuka..." Meiling breathed. The woman, Komachi, was a shinigami - a god of death who ferried souls across the river.
Komachi grinned at Meiling, now standing close enough for conversation. "Can't take living people across the river unless it's an emergency! And it doesn't seem like there is one right now, so you're gonna have to wait!" She chuckled.
Meiling walked slowly towards Komachi, and knelt before her. "Please. End my life."
Komachi's eyes widened. "What now?!"
"I hurt the ones I love the most. I made them fear and resent me. I don't have any further reason to live." Meiling whispered.
Komachi stared at Meiling, as if reading her. Then she sighed. "Come sit down." She said, walking over to a patch of grass and patting next to her.
"Please, I don't want to talk, just slay me already." Meiling insisted.
"Come. Sit." Komachi repeated, now as an order. Meiling paused, then walked over and sat down next to her. With a smile, Komachi leaned back in the grass, and closed her eyes, placing her arms behind her head. "Now, let's start from the top. I'm not going to oblige your request. For starters, killing a dragon isn't in my job description."
Meiling stood up. "Who told you?!" She asked desperately.
"Calm down, calm down. Nobody told me. I can just tell by looking at your soul. Sit down and relax." Komachi encouraged. With minor hesitation, Meiling seated herself again. "Now. I can obviously tell you're in a lot of pain, but unfortunately, taking your own life — or encouraging others to take it — that's not the answer. It rarely is. From what I can tell, you love these people very much, of course. But I think you're being too hasty." Komachi sighed peacefully, staring up at the blue sky. "There's so much more to enjoy left for you. So many experiences you have yet to have, so many good memories you have yet to make. And I don't think you're giving your friends enough credit."
Meiling turned to look at her. "What do you mean?"
"I don't know who it is, but it sounds like you've loved these people for a very, very long time." Komachi continued with a smile. "Just guessing, of course, but shinigami intuition is pretty good about these things." She added. "Now, while right now, things may seem bad, or it may seem like you've hurt these people... is that really the case?"
"What do you mean?" Meiling repeated.
"Well. Let's look at it this way. If you've been together for such a long time... do you really think that just one little incident would end that love for good?"
Meiling sighed. "It wasn't just one little incident, though. What I did — how I acted — was completely monstrous and unacceptable."
"Even so!" Komachi insisted. "I don't think you should give up that easily. This is a test of love. Love that never gets tested is bound to fall apart, because it's never been forged properly. Things can't always be perfect between you and your friends, coworkers, or even family." Komachi took another deep, relaxed sigh. "But what matters is choosing to keep that love, and strengthen it. Cast it and polish it. Rather than throwing it away like scrap metal, and starting over. The more that is thrown at a well-forged weapon, the more weathered it gets, this is true. But..." Komachi opened her eyes, and turned to smile at Meiling. "That just means it needs to be remade. Reforged, strengthened and healed. Oh, sure, there may be a few scars left over from previous wounds. But they're part of that sword's character now. Not flaws that need to be erased."
Meiling remained silent, pulling her knees in and staring at her feet.
"The stronger your love becomes, the harder it is to break, snap, melt or shatter. And eventually, even a dragon's fire won't be enough to destroy such feelings." Komachi continued. "That you feel this way doesn't mean that love is over. It means you need to return to the smith, reforge it, and emerge stronger and more connected than ever before. Too many weapons are left unfinished because they're not perfect on arrival. But nothing ever is. Not even a dragon. It takes time."
Meiling felt tears welling in her eyes. "That's impossible. I can't think of any way that they'd forgive me for acting so out of turn."
"Really? I think they're less scared and angry AT you, and more scared and worried FOR you." Komachi suggested. "Seeing a loved one lose their composure can be a frightening thing, and it may put a strain on the love that binds you to them. But more often than not, the anger isn't directed at you. There's always something deeper. No one wakes up one day and decides to be evil." Komachi's smile faded, and she sighed, closing her eyes again. "They have to be thoroughly beaten and broken, first. So the question is, do you let this act beat you down, allowing resentment and malice to grow in your heart? Or do you take the broken remains, cast and fire them, and create something incredible?"
Meiling thought for a long time. Komachi's words made sense, they did, but...would they really still love her? Even seeing her like that? Seeing her enraged and dangerous, hateful and full of resentment?
As if reading Meiling's mind, Komachi pressed "Whether the love does or doesn't get destroyed, well. That comes later. But a brick of metal doesn't do anything just sitting there. You won't know what it's supposed to be until you actually start working with it. You can't break or ruin a weapon that hasn't even been cut from the steel yet."
At this, Meiling's resolve hardened. "If that is the case...I would rather accept whatever comes than let the love I have for my family fade. At the very least, I can let them know my true feelings, regardless of what comes next."
Komachi smiled, and simply replied "That's the way." As Meiling got up to leave, Komachi called "By the way, you know how the Sanzu River works, right?"
Meiling turned, confused. "The distance to the other side gets longer the more sinful you were, right?"
"That's right. I wanted to tell you." Komachi stood up, and stretched, before giving Meiling a sly grin. "If I HAD taken your life today... Your ride across would only be about thirty seconds." Komachi picked up her scythe and began walking away, picking up her whistling where she left off.
Meiling watched her go, tears welling in her eyes. She bowed towards Komachi and shouted "Thank you for everything!" Komachi raised her hand without turning back, and soon enough, vanished into the fog. Meiling turned, wiping her eyes, and her face growing determined. "Whatever happens... I have to take full responsibility. Any less would be disgraceful." With that, she began to walk back towards the Misty Lake.
At the Scarlet Devil Mansion, Remilia was pacing back and forth. In front of her, Sakuya appeared. "Milady, I cannot find her anywhere. I've asked many people, but no one has seen her. I'm beginning to get worried."
"As am I." Remilia breathed, shaking her head. "We're a disgrace. I'm the mistress of the Scarlet Devil Mansion. I'm supposed to be unshakable, fearless. Yet when Meiling began to shift, we all cowered like children. Terrified of what she truly is. How could we treat her like that? After all she's done for us, her true nature gives us pause?"
"No, Milady. It is my fault for suggesting such a thing. I should have known it would be a sensitive issue for Meiling. Frankly, I'm not sure how I came to such a conclusion. My judgement was..." Sakuya closed her eyes. "Misguided."
Flandre shook her head. "No, Sakuya! You wanted everyone to see Meiling as who she is! That was a really kind thing to do! People shouldn't be afraid of Meiling, she's no different than the rest of us! Even if Meiling got scary at the end, I think it's a good idea! I mean, it's what we all hoped for someday, right? That we could show everyone how pretty and strong Meiling truly is as a dragon? We wanted to be proud of her for being so brave, right?"
At this, Remilia and Sakuya smiled. "You're absolutely right, Flan. Meiling deserves better, she shouldn't have to hide from the world like this." Remilia agreed. "We should be proud of what she is and honored that she's willing to befriend us. To serve under us." Remilia paused, then growled "That does it. I don't care what Hakurei has to say. If she tries to hurt or exterminate Meiling I'll fight her to my last breath. No one attacks our family like this. Not even Reimu."
Flandre raised her hand. "Ooh! Ooh! Me too! I wanna pay Reimu back for cheating last time! I want a rematch!"
Sakuya nodded. "And should it come to that, I shall simply whisk Meiling far away until the situation cools. I'm sure any of the youkai societies at Youkai Mountain would be glad to take her in temporarily."
Remilia clapped her hands together. "Then it's settled! As soon as we find Meiling, we'll-" She paused, as footsteps could suddenly be heard nearby. "Um. Is that Patchouli?"
Sakuya shook her head, gazing in the direction of the sound. "No, Milady. Miss Patchouli is still recovering from fortifying the mansion. Miss Koakuma is there with her, and the fairy maids are off cleaning the library."
Remilia glared, Gungnir shimmering to life in her hand. "Then who-"
The footsteps paused, and then, out from behind the archway — Meiling stood. Sakuya gasped, putting her hands to her mouth, as tears began to well in her eyes. Flandre fell silent, her face twisting up as she began to cry. Remilia stared at Meiling, her breathing growing unsteady. Before any of them could say anything, Meiling prostrated herself on the floor in front of them, surprising all of them.
"Miladies." Meiling murmured. "I know that what I did, what I said, can never be forgiven. I was completely out of line, I threatened the very blood of this mansion, and I struck fear into the heart of the head of household. I don't ask for forgiveness, but I do offer up my life as a meager compensation for my actions. Please, slay me however you see fit."
There was a pregnant pause. Then, Remilia walked over, stopping in front of Meiling, who waited. Then: "Please lift your head, Meiling." Meiling's eyes widened and she looked up at Remilia, who had tears streaming down her face.
"Milady—" Meiling whispered.
"You're an idiot, a moron, a nincompoop." Remilia sniffled. "You horrible excuse for a servant. You had us worried sick. How dare you leave this household without my permission." She was trying to be strict, but her voice wouldn't stop wavering, and she couldn't stop the tears. "Do you think that little of our protection? That we're not worth at least that much to you?"
Tears welled up in Meiling's own eyes. "No, Milady. You and everyone in this mansion are worth more than the most precious gemstones in the world to me. That is why I left. After instilling such fear in the hearts of my family—"
"Shut up. Just shut up." Remilia choked out. "I won't hear any more. The blame lies on Flandre, Sakuya and I. All this time, we've known what you are. We've been supportive of you in every way. And yet, seeing the vestiges of your true form, we acted like rotten cowards before them. We feared the very person we were trying so hard to protect. Our behavior was abhorrent and flies in the face of everything we've said we love about you. So please..." Remilia sobbed. "Raise your head, Meiling. Stand with pride. No one should judge you for who you are, least of all us. You are a valuable member of this family, and we should never, ever have acted like this towards you."
Meiling sat there, stunned, before hoarsely saying "Milady. Mistress, Remi. I can't accept this. This wasn't what I was expecting. I should be punished, I should be executed for my actions!"
Sakuya spoke. "If we did such a thing, we'd have to cut open our own stomachs next. For there would be no further honor in this household." She sighed, wiping tears away.
Meiling sunk to the floor, gently pounding her fists on it. "Why...Why are you treating me like this? I don't deserve it. I've done a horrible, unforgivable thing! I've lost my temper and threatened the ones I love! How can you continue, even now, to treat me with such kindness?"
Flandre walked over, and knelt next to Meiling, gently taking her hands. Meiling's gaze rose to look at Flandre. "Because we love you, Meiling. That's all that matters." She said softly. "That's all that ever mattered."
Meiling began sniffling, then sobbing unabashedly, as Flandre pulled her into a tight hug. "Flan...Remi, Sakuya...I can never, never in a thousand lifetimes, ever repay you—"
Remilia smiled, wiping away her tears now. "You idiot. You already did...just by coming back to us."
At this, Meiling had no other answer besides continuing to weep.
Remilia turned to Sakuya. "Sakuya."
Sakuya bowed. "Yes, Milady."
"When this is over, we are going directly to the Hakurei Shrine. All of us."
"Yes, Milady."
"Whatever happens there, whatever Hakurei says... We'll face it together. No matter the cost."
Sakuya smiled. "Even if you had said no, I would have gone there myself, Milady."
Remilia grinned, and nodded. "Good. However, we can save the rest of the tears for later." Meiling and Flandre stood, and turned to Remilia. "We still have a problem. That oomukade is still out there, and until we know for sure it's not going to attack Meiling anymore, the barriers remain."
"Yes, Milady." Sakuya bowed. "Shall I contact several of the more powerful figures of Gensokyo, Milady?"
Remilia shook her head. "Not at this time. If Hakurei already has questions, Matara, Yakumo and Ibaraki will needle us endlessly. We will tell Reimu, and then whatever she does with that information is at her discretion. For now, all we can do is trust that Meiling is safe as long as Hakurei is on the move. She'll likely enlist the help of Margatroid again, as well as Eientei, Kirisame, Kochiya and the Netherworld. With these, I currently have no problem. She may also reach out to you Sakuya, so at that time, be prepared to act. Cooperate with her, same as always."
Sakuya bowed again. "Yes, Milady."
Remilia turned. "Meiling."
"Yes, Milady?" Meiling managed.
"If you ever leave without telling me again, I WILL kill you." She joked with a smile.
Meiling grinned. "Yes, Milady!"
"Where are we even going with this, Reimu?" Marisa moaned as they flew over the Forest of Magic.
"I told you. First thing's first, we're going to Kasen. She'll yell and grumble at me, but she'll likely help us out." Reimu responded. "After that, we're gathering the usual people. Sanae, Reisen, Alice, etc. Between Moriya and Eientei, plus Tewi's informant network, we'll have an easier time. I'm also gonna get in contact with Mamizou, since she has influence that reaches pretty far with her tanuki, too."
Marisa grinned wildly. "Pullin' out all the stops, huh? Callin' in everyone? What if they're busy? What if they don't wanna help? What then?"
Reimu sighed. "It doesn't matter. If they're busy, too bad. This is for Gensokyo. And if they don't wanna help me..." She growled. "I'll just kick their ass in danmaku... and make them help."