NOVEL WEB Chapter 24
[So in the end, was Yeon-jung going through a slump?]
[It does feel that way.]
Jae-Ah’s words felt like she was hiding something. They were meaningful. I considered probing further, but I believed she would tell me herself someday, so I let the conversation pass.
[But didn’t you say you don’t like pure literature because it’s boring?]
[I actually still think that. But talking with my brother made me rethink a bit. I used to think that someone who writes that kind of novel would be boring too, but he said my stories are interesting. So, yeah.]
So it was because of the conversation I had after seeing Jae-Ah’s literary work that her thoughts changed. It felt a bit proud yet strange.
[Then let’s start classes from next week. Think about the novel you want to write. For now, let’s aim to complete a short story.]
[Okay.]
[By the way, how is Professor Seo doing?]
[Father is the same as always.]
[Isn’t he talking about me?]
[No, but he seems to be sighing a lot these days.]
What could be making him sigh? Well, he’s always been peculiar, so I didn’t want to think too much about it. He probably wanted that.
After my conversation with Jae-Ah ended, I really had nothing to do. I should read or write a novel, but for some reason, I didn’t feel like doing that at the moment.
Gang Hwa-won was still not responding to me. Did something really happen?
Or was it because I had become a woman that he…
Let’s not have unnecessary thoughts. I forced myself to ignore it and mindlessly scrolled through my smartphone.
I had lived a busy life. Becoming an orphan, I dreamed the absurd dream of becoming a writer.
After achieving that dream, this was how things turned out.
I couldn’t help but laugh bitterly.
When I found time to think like this, self-mockery and disdain for myself naturally surfaced.
It was a bad habit.
In any case, since there was nothing to do for a while, I should just stay holed up in the house.
If I didn’t want to write or read, should I look for a hobby or something?
Sometimes one needs to rest, but having lived without leisure my whole life, I didn’t even know how to relax.
If I weren’t in this state, I would have called Gang Hwa-won and had a drink, but that was impossible now.
Once I stepped into my room, I saw my computer. It was an old computer, probably over five years old, and its condition wasn’t great. I hadn’t used it for anything other than writing, so I hadn’t bought an expensive one.
But still, simple tasks weren’t a problem. I turned on the computer and opened a file containing the text I habitually used. As I naturally read through it again, I somehow didn’t like it.
It was common not to like things I had written previously. What seemed good while writing could look like kindling the next day. However, I don’t think I’ve ever come across something that felt like garbage while writing but seemed good the next day.
Once a piece of writing is bad, it remains bad forever.
Well, since I hadn’t turned on the computer to write, I decided to postpone the revisions and closed the file. I didn’t particularly want to write at that moment. Since there was no deadline looming, it wouldn’t be an issue.
But looking back now, I should have held on to that piece. Whether I revised it or rewrote it, I should have clung to it and savored it completely.
Because it was the last piece of ‘my writing’ I had left.
I should have found a way to uncover the fragments of myself within it. If I had done that, maybe I wouldn’t have lost it.
But what was lost would never return.
Time only passed further.
~
That day, I ended up spending the whole day web surfing on my computer. I considered playing games, but as I didn’t know much about them and my computer wouldn’t hold up, I eventually gave up.
I must have taken quite a long nap, yet sleepiness hit me early. Without resisting, I went to the sofa, grabbed the pillow I bought during the day, and closed my eyes.
I didn’t dream.
Or maybe I just don’t remember.
~
I was awakened by the sound of my smartphone ringing. Looking at the time, it was already lunchtime. I must have fallen into a deeper sleep than I thought. I picked up my smartphone and answered the call.
“Hello.”
“Seol-guk?”
The voice was familiar. It felt like I had heard it before, but who was it?
“Who is this?”
“It’s Ham Yejin. Did you not save my number?”
Now that I think about it, I felt like I had received such a call.
“I’ll save it now. What’s going on?”
“I clearly told you to avoid going out, didn’t I?”
With those words from Ham Yejin, I realized what kind of situation was happening.
“It seems you’ve been photographed, and a picture with your white hair has been spread online.”
“But I was wearing a hat properly.”
“You wore it a bit askew. A bit of your flowing hair was visible. It’s not too widely spread yet, but there might be articles coming out soon. Even if the exact address isn’t known, they’ll know you live nearby, so be careful.”
“…I’m sorry.”
Apologizing felt humiliating in many ways. I was the one who shouldn’t have gone out. I felt foolish for being persuaded by Muk Ha-neul to go outside.
“And just in case, please don’t post anything online. It would only pour oil on the fire.”
“I could ask the site to take down the photo…”
“Everyone has probably already downloaded it. It’s meaningless. I can’t do much more, but you really need to avoid going out from now on.”
With those words, the call with Ham Yejin ended. Cold sweat broke out.
Following the link Ham Yejin sent me, I found my photos posted on several community sites. It was a photo taken with Muk Ha-neul. Fortunately, Muk Ha-neul’s face wasn’t visible. But the issue wasn’t that. My face was definitely captured, albeit slightly blurry.
[Isn’t that the novelist? The one who became a woman due to this TS disease.]
The content of the writing was like this. Had someone randomly taken a picture of me on the way back? I was captured while returning home.
[No way… it must be someone else. Isn’t that person in their late 20s? They’re really small.]
[I found some cases overseas where most of the people who got the disease shrunk significantly. There’s a possibility it could be them.]
[Isn’t it a dead giveaway? There’s hardly anyone with white hair in Korea.]
[Could be an albino?]
[Doesn’t look like it from the skin tone.]
[There are no albinos in Korea, yet this timing coincidence?]
[No, it’s just a kid, are you all crazy?]
[That guy killed someone.]
[I heard the girl outed first.]
[Is there a comparison between being an orphan and being a member of the LGBTQ community?]
[Seeing how they acted in front of the reporters, didn’t they expect backlash? Lol.]
[What’s wrong with being an orphan? Is being a member of the LGBTQ community a sanctuary?]
[Sure, idiot.]
[In any case, I have to give credit to the PC brigade’s antics.]
[I’d be seriously hurt if I were just some irrelevant kid. I’ll stay neutral… .]
[But they’re really cute; it seems like someone else entirely.]
[I heard that guy’s original face was pretty good-looking.]
Fortunately, it seemed that the photo was still in a phase of uncertainty where people were not sure if it was really me or not, but it was only a matter of time.
Should I be glad that I hadn’t made any social media accounts until now? There were people online trying to trace my steps, but there was nothing for them to find.
But a person cannot go through life leaving no trace at all. My smartphone rang again. It was my editor.
When I answered, I heard the indifferent voice of my usual editor.
“Yes, writer.”
“…Hello.”
Naturally, my editor was startled when he heard my voice.
“Uh, is this Seol-guk’s mobile?”
“Yes, this is correct. Editor Kim Sung-kyu. You must have heard the news; my voice would have changed too.”
“I really didn’t expect such a young voice. It’s really amazing…”
“What’s the reason for the call? I told you I was still preparing for my next work.”
“Of course I called because of this incident. There are contract issues to discuss, but for now, shouldn’t we resolve this?”
Editor Kim Sung-kyu sounded unusually excited. He was indifferent to everything except for the money my writing could bring him. I didn’t like his demeanor while I was going through this struggle, but I was a bit curious about what he meant by resolving it.
Did he have some sort of plan?
“Actually, your book’s sales have skyrocketed due to this issue. Have you been to bookstores? It’s really nostalgic; it’s making a comeback. It’ll probably drop soon, but still, it’s amazing for an old novel to be selling like this. However, the next work might be a bit tougher.”
The news my editor shared was surprising. Immediately, I turned on my computer while still on the phone and accessed bookstore sites. It was true. My book was in the daily bestseller list.
“So let’s not extinguish this fire but make it blaze even more. What do you think?”
“What do you mean by that?”
“Actually, we’ve received a ton of interview requests from publishers. So let’s gather those reporters and hold a press conference! Ignite the fire and make a big hit!”
Just hearing it sounded like a ludicrous plan. No matter what, how could a writer embroiled in controversy over misogyny and outing hold a press conference and expect public opinion to turn? However, the editor seemed to have a different idea.
“That’s even better. Writer, you’re a woman now, right? Now that you’ve experienced being a woman, it’s really hard! Seeing the avalanche of misogyny and hate comments online made you realize a lot! You plan to make a comeback and live on! That’s it! I’ve seen the photo too, writer. With that appearance, you can turn things around. Just shed some tears and apologize at the press conference, and boom! You become a superstar! What do you think? Doesn’t it sound good?”
Crazy bastard.