The Tower of Emnu

“Ever since I came to the tower, my...emotions, my physical reactions to things… they have changed. I want to ask if you know why and how...how I can change those reactions?” Aaron asked, swallowing a bit nervously, but glad he got the question of his chest.

The great master stroked his beard for a few long moments before he answered.

“It is a difficult and a simple question at the same time. This body you inhabit was created by Emnu, it was made from the template of your soul. You are the same height, have the same eye color, the same physical proportions, but at the same time your body is very different. For one it is significantly younger than your old body. All Aspirants get summoned in bodies that are barely adults. For humans I suspect its the equivalent of around 18 years old.

You were much older than that in your old life, yes?”

Aaron nodded and the Great master continued.

“Your body has been changed and while yes it was formed in your souls image a great many things were standardized. You don’t have degenerative diseases or any other genetic defects or long term health problems. No Aspirant is near sighted for example, but in short every body is perfected and set to a norm. Including your brains biochemistry. I am by far no expert on the fusion of flesh and the soul, The Ghost could help you with that, but I doubt he will feel you are worth his time yet. But what I can tell you is this, if you experience the world differently, then its because you are in a different body. And on top of that cultivation itself changes your body quite fundamentally which has a deep influence on your psyche. I can’t tell you exactly why or how you are feeling about things that differ from your old life, but there are ways to harmonize your soul and your body in the short term and in the long term.”

“How?” Aaron asked. Everything the great master said aligned with his own theories and that did make him feel better. He just wanted to stop feeling like every reaction was not an input that come from himself, but from his body.

“The easiest way is time. Spend ten or twenty years in this body and you will harmonize with it naturally. It is a slow process this way, but it will leave you much stronger mentally than any other way. The second, slightly shorter, option is to step into the Foundation realm. Each major realm breakthrough will purify your body, spirit and soul. It’s a fundamental transformation process. You will leave behind the physical things that plague you and you will have the chance to do so with mental baggage as well.”

Aaron frowned and asked: “How long will it take me to step into the Foundation realm?”

“Years.” was the simple answer the great master gave and Aaron’s frown deepened.

“That is too long. It...bothers me. More than I maybe expressed to you. But I can’t be happy or sad about anything without thinking its not me that is feeling this, but this new body of mine. Please there has to be a way.”

“There are many ways that can help you, but they all come with a price. I personally don’t feel like any of them are worth it at this point. You are too young, too rash. Introducing more variables at this point might destabilize you.”

“What? I don’t understand.”

“As a cultivator learning techniques is far more consequential than you could have ever guessed. Every technique, every cultivation art will change you. Learning a technique is internalizing it, is to become one with it, to make it your own. It is a philosophical statement for most people in the multiverse when I say, what you do will change you. It is subtle most of the time for most people, but not for Cultivators. Every technique you learn will change you in a fundamental way, even those who harmonize with you. In your case, learning Wind Steps and using the technique so often has instilled you with an unquenchable desire for freedom. To move beyond the physical laws of the universe. Those who practice this technique often feel trapped, they crave for the open sky and to feel unfettered from the world. The Fiend-god art on the other hand instills you with a sense of Independence, of Pride. Of Survival against all odds. You will value your own self sufficiency above all else and you will have the confidence to survive wherever you go. Last but not least, the Heavenly Kata grounds you. It makes you more blunt and straight forward on one hand, but it in itself is a meditative technique that will ground and instill you with patience. But it will also make you stubborn and set in your ways if you had not other techniques pulling you in the opposite direction.

Tell me, my young friend, are those feelings familiar to you?”

Aaron opened and closed his mouth. He wanted to deny it, but he remembered each feeling the great master had described so clearly. The feeling of freedom, of soaring through the sky. The Fiend-god art less so, but the confidence to survive had only grown even though he had almost died so many times. He had felt like Aranack so many times, how he had been hunted just like him and how he had escaped. Everything the great master had said was true. Half of the changes he had experienced to his emotional landscape came from his techniques, if he was right. The other half came from his body being fundamentally different. His brain chemistry, his neurological responses to things. They were all different. His new body had none of the problems of his old body and of course that would affect him in some way. No forever chemicals, no health problems. No years of depression. He had known that his new body had been different. Ever since he had seen his own body without any of the scars a life of danger had given him he had known he was different in some way.

But it was so hard to accept it, so hard to feel like he was not losing himself. He sagged down and held his head in his hands. He stayed that way for a few long moments, sorting through how he felt, how he was, how he could deal with all of those insights into changes he had no control over. Eventually he looked back up, because he was not a man who would wallow in despair or self pity.

The sweet voice of Mei drifted over, gentle and caring, which was uncharacteristic of her, but made it impossible not to hang on her every word and look at her mesmerized.

“It is alright, child. I too long for freedom, to soar through the skies of my home world, to rid myself of this cage. More than you can ever believe. But I am free already, because my mind is free.” Mei was still sitting cross-legged with her hands resting on her knees. She turned her right palm up and gently lifted it in an almost hypnotic display of grace. Aaron felt like he could see wind dance above her open palm and there suddenly was a slight draft in the still air of the prison.

“Freedom does not come from being free. It is in your head, your perceptions change reality and I feel like I am free. My mind has no constraints, even though my body has. But our physical form always has constraints. Cultivation in many ways is the art of creating a body that can handle an unfettered mind. But unless one becomes a Transcendant your body will always constrain your soul, that never changes. It is how you deal with the quirks of your techniques that will determine how you fare with the changes our techniques imposes on us. You can learn to isolate and control those impulses. All it takes is patience, a little time and meditation.”

Sylus leaned on the metal bars of his prison with a smirk and nodded along.

“She is right, you know. We all change all the time. There is nothing scary or nefarious about it. Things happen all the time to people that are entirely out of their control. But those Events change them either way. You can never change that fact. You will change and you can never stop it. But what you can do is change how you react to things that affect you. Your body is not the same anymore? Well it has not been every day of your life. You change continuously, even if the differences are small. All you can do is make sure you are happy with the changes and guide them in the right direction. Give it time, you have a good head on your shoulders. All you need to do is think about how you want to react to impulses. Every time you have an impulse reaction to something, give yourself a minute time to introspect and then react when you are sure that is what you want to do.

Control your mind just like you control your body.” Sylus clenched his fist and punched once in the air. Aaron recognized the punch instantly, it was the first punch you threw in the Rejuvenating Fist kata.

“The heavenly Kata requires perfect control over your body and that is the starting requirement. Controlling your mind is just as hard, but not harder than that. All it takes is experience and constant practice.”

Aaron felt a bit better hearing all of that, after hearing he could control his own emotions, could control the changes that this new world had forced upon him and he planned to do just that. To control himself. It made sense to him to wait and think about his own emotional reactions before he actually gave in to them. He would have control that way and would know it was him that felt that way, not just his body. But that was also the problem. The Aaron on Earth would have never felt better after hearing something like that. His emotional landscape had been placid and tranquil like a perfect mirror. He had suffered over the innocents he had murdered intellectually, but it had never moved him the same way that literally any little thing affected him now emotionally. He chuckled to himself. Maybe it was not this body that was broken, but his old one. Maybe the tranquility he sought, the unshakable equilibrium he had in his previous life, was not as beautiful and tranquil than it had seemed at the time.

Aaron still could do what he needed to in this body, he just needed to train himself to do it. He could control himself, he had done so before after all. His first murder in this world had been without hesitation, because he had needed it to be. Only when finishing someone off, only when there had been other options he had hesitated. Those reactions he could analyze and control.

“Well said, you two. I am glad you are taking your roles as teachers seriously.” the great master said.

“So, that is all I can do? Control the response to my emotions, think about it and then either approve or disapprove?” Aaron asked slowly, still trying to digest everything.

“Yes, that is the way to work through your disconnect and accept who you are now. There are other ways to force this process, but doing it like this will train you to analyze your mind and feelings, which will come in handy down the line on your Cultivation journey. For now though, I want you to think over those suggestions and the knowledge we have imparted on you. Calm down and cultivate. Your dantian is almost full, you should use a day or two to fill your dantian to maximum capacity and then let me help you break through to the second level of the Qi Refining realm.”

Aaron had to lot to chew on and even though he still had more questions and things he needed answers to and help with, he was content to follow the master’s advice for now. He slowed his breathing and fished one of the manastones out of the pouch that still lay there glittering in front of him. He tried to calm down, but his thoughts tumbled end over end, were chaotic and wild. His anxiety over the changes to him had vanished and had been replaced by only a slight trepidation about his current situation and how to solve it. Aaron paused, analyzed his feelings about it. He did not like that there was not a simple solution, a pill he could swallow and make everything like it had been before in his old life. But he knew at the same time that that was not how life worked. There had never been simple solutions to any of his problems and the path that he had taken in his last life had started as a reaction to outside forces trying to hurt the people he loved. That he had talent and in the end had liked doing the job he had found out much later. Aaron knew he was a murderer, that he had enjoyed solving the problems of how to stalk, abduct and kill his targets. Overcoming those problems had been the real challenge, the real thing he had gotten addicted to. The killing had just been a means to an end. The hunt had always been more interesting to him than the kill at the end.

That had not changed. He still had enjoyed planning and ambushing his pursuers. To outwit them, to put himself into a position where he could beat a force far stronger and far more numerous than him. But in this new world he had never had the comfort of being anonymous, of not being forced to react to people coming to kill him at every minute of every day. That was really the source of unease and pressure on him. His newfound mercy and the whole emotional spectrum from joy to fear of death to outright panic and anxiety, did not help. It was all so difficult to cope with, so difficult to find a solution to the puzzle that was his new body and mind. But if he could follow the suggestions of the cultivators he might have found a way to do it. Pause whenever he felt something and think about it. Did he feel that way for the right reasons, was that feeling helpful or did it hinder him in some way? He could solve it if he kept up with it and that was an empowering feeling.

Aaron found the rhythm of his breath and the Qi pulsing in his veins. His mind settled into a comfortable state and he drew in the Qi into his dantian, more at ease, more aligned with himself than ever before and the Qi followed suit. It streamed into his dantian, flooded it with wild abandon. Aaron barely felt the cut he made with one of his unenchanted daggers in the palm of his hand before he started to absorb the mana in the stone, fueling his cultivation art. Time passed in a blink, while his dantian filled itself, while he just sat there, in peace and with the certain knowledge that he was safe for the moment. Inside of his dantian the hazy fog of Qi that aggregated around the central point in this mystical space slowly it started to rotate, while Aaron drew in more and more Qi to fuel the Cycling technique of the Fiend-god art.

When Aaron awoke from his trance he had absorbed 2 entire manastones and his dantian was filled to the brim. He felt actually satiated from it, like he would from a full stomach. There was a bit of space to fill it further, but he was not sure if pulling more Qi in would result in his dantian violently exploding or something, so he stopped.

“Excellent work, Aaron. I see you had to cultivate in tense situations, where you had to keep one eye open even during deepest meditation. Don’t think that this weariness is for naught. It has improved your speed, control and awareness of Qi by more than I could have hoped for. What should have taken 3 or 4 sessions of cultivation has only taken you one this time. I think it is time for you to break through into a new realm.”