The Throne I Left

The Cave of Resets. Or at least that’s what they used to call it. The official name was something long like The Cave of the Dead... Johan couldn’t quite remember it. After someone died their souls would be gathered by Death and then sent along until they came here, where the memories of their previous life were erased and they waited to be reborn.

The inside of those pearls was probably the closest you could get to an actual afterlife. Or at least that’s what Johan imagined. As a deity he would never see the inside of one even if he died.

But…this cave was in Heaven, how did Johan and Note stumble upon it in the mountain next to Solstad?!

“These flowers weren’t here before” Note noted, taking a few careful steps inside. Johan nodded. Someone must have put them there.

“There must be a connection between the worlds.” Johan said. Why hadn’t they known that before? It would have been useful information back when they actually lived in Heaven.

“We would have known.” Note reassured seriously. “It must have appeared afterwards.”

Johan shot Note a look, he clearly didn’t remember how little Signe used to like him. Johan could still clearly remember the ugly, distrustful looks she used to give everyone the first few weeks of being a deity, still walking around in the dirty, brown pants and cloak she had died in. To be fair though, at that point Note had been dealing with things in very similar ways so he probably didn’t notice.

As Johan’s eyes passed over the cave, he noticed a flash of light coming from the tunnel ahead. Signe must be there!

He had just set off when a hand on his chest stopped him.

“Wait.” Note gave him a concerned look. “There are mementos.”

Johan paused, his eyebrows raising. He looked around carefully, almost not noticing them even after Note pointed them out. The faint shimmer of the edges were almost completely hidden in the glow of the flowers.

Oh. Johan startled. There were a lot of them! They were all across the cave, and littered the entire area ahead!

“Who would leave mementos in here?” Johan wondered aloud, not just a little concerned. “There wasn't any last time we were here, right?”

Note shook his head. “No sign of fighting either. Someone must have been really upset in here.”

Johan ventured forward carefully but got stuck pretty quickly, a wall of mementos making it impossible to get past.

“There’s too many. We have to go through some of them.” Johan wasn’t looking forward to it, but they had to find Signe as soon as possible. Looking for a path between the mementos would be like going through a maze, and there was no guarantee they wouldn’t accidentally get sucked into some of them. It would just take too much time!

And maybe they would give some clues as to what was going on.

Johan tok a deep breath, preparing himself for the worst, and stepped in.

The memory tok over immediately. His own sight fading away as a scene formed around him. He was outside, on the training ground behind the palace, a gasp escaping him as he landed heavily on his ass. He pushed his way up on his elbows, heart beating like crazy and a deep sneer on his face. His eyes glared at the warrior standing in front of him. A wild grin on her face and a big axe in her hands as her light green hair and white dress danced elegantly in the wind around her.

It was Signe.

Then suddenly he was back in the cave.

What the…

He shook his head, disoriented. That was Signe, there was no doubt. But why would anyone have a memento of her, especially in this cave? Mementos were made of extreme emotion. Being beaten in a fight? That didn’t seem like enough.

He paused, thinking.

“That day on the training field.” Note said, having followed him through the same memento.

That’s when it clicked.

The sins- well, Greed really-, had gathered Note and Signe, as well as Johan, on the training ground to check their capabilities. It was only a week or so after Johan’s dad had died and Note and Signe became deities, and it was the first time they had gathered on the training field. Johan remembered Greed being so angry that day, fed up with Note and Signe’s behaviors. Both of them had been acting out in aggression at their new situations. Not to mention their strong dislike for each other, which definitely made things harder. That day had been the first time they ever acted on the same side against a common enemy - the sins.

Arrogance was overflowing from both sides. Johan remembered standing to the side, right beside Greed, split between being terrified and amazed as he watched it all unfold.

Greed had issued a challenge and after many refusals from Note and Signe to show their ability to fight, Wrath had stepped in, taunting Signe for her clothes, her long hair, her shoes- until Signe finally had enough. That was the first time the two of them ever fought, the first of many. The deity of Death against the deity of War, the strongest warrior in Heaven. If Wrath won then Signe and Note would start training with the sins, if Signe won they wouldn’t.

Nobody had expected the result. For the first time ever Wrath had been beaten in a fight. The sins had been quiet for a long time after that, only snapping out of their shock when Note started laughing, saying that they must really be bad if their strongest could be beaten by someone like Signe.

“Why is this memory here?” Johan wondered, a bad feeling in his stomach. “Why would Wrath relive it here…?”

She couldn’t still be angry that Signe beat her?

Note met his eyes but didn’t answer, he bit his lip with a worried look on his face. He must have thought the same.

They ventured on through the room, avoiding as many mementos as possible. While it would technically be faster to go straight through, reliving memories like that took a lot of energy and they both needed it for the following fight.

After a dozen meters they hit another dead end and this time Note entered first. Johan watched him freeze in place before he followed.

He was in the markets in Heaven, arms crossed and body leaning against the stone rail separating the stone path from the green grass behind him. It was a beautiful day, the sky bright blue and not a cloud in sight. A wind gust blew bright orange hair across his face and he casually blew it away, eyes staying on the group across the street.

Gluttony, Sloth and Signe. They were just passing by but he could clearly see the happy energy they were exhibiting. Even Sloth, who was seemingly just switching between being pulled along or slowly following them, was in a much better mood than normal, a small smile resting on his face as he added to the conversation. A loud conversation.

Well, loud wasn’t the right word, Johan couldn’t hear what they were talking about, however he could see Signe turning her head back at Sloth’s words, could hear their laughter at what he said, and he could see Sloth’s quiet huffs and snorts.

Johan stared at Signe. Unsurprisingly, she was wearing another white dress again, this time with a tight and detailed chestpiece going all the way up her shoulders to wrap around her neck, an elegant, long skirt flowing lightly behind her. Her hair was down, with only the front pieces braided back, the rest cascading in waves down her back. As she turned around, once again laughing at something Sloth said, his eyes caught on the silver ear cuff, the large axe her small frame was somehow able to wield, and the link of white souls dangling from her earlobe.

Beautiful, he couldn’t help but think, then quickly clenched his jaw shut. She was not beautiful. He glared after her. Then a different voice called out. “Vero!” And he turned around.

Then he was back in the cave again.

He frowned.

“You saw the same thing right?” He turned and asked Note, not managing to hold his curiosity.

“Yeah..?” Note frowned back, looking equally perplexed. Johan paused, realizing the voice in the vision was Note’s. He must have been there too, probably together with Frey if Signe’s group was anything to go by.

“She was just staring at Signe the entire time. Again.” Johan said, thinking out loud in hopes that Note could give him any insight. “I just- it doesn’t seem like this should be enough to make a memento?”

“She must have relived it after our deaths.” Note said and Johan cocked his head, thinking. That did make sense, though it was still weird, Wrath always seemed so aggressive from his own point of view, but seeing it from hers...he really couldn’t tell what it was.

They were almost past the mementos now, one more would be enough to get across to the other side of the room. He took a deep breath and eyed the wall in front of him.

He walked into it.

He sat in a dark cave in front of a fire, the only light coming from the flickering flames. He was shivering, savoring the warmth from the fire when suddenly something warm and soft fell over his head, obstructing his view.

He ripped it off with a small snarl but froze when he realized what it was, the brown leather warm and soft in his freezing hands. His eyes lingering on it as confusion settled in and he looked up, eyes following short legs as they moved around him, and watched as Signe sat down next to him with a thud, her eyes closed. She didn’t acknowledge the gesture, instead she only leaned back on her elbows and inched her bare feet closer to the warm fire.

“You…” He hesitated, eyes flickering from the cloak and to her. “Why..?” He asked tentatively and Signe turned to her side and smiled softly at him. His heart skipped a beat and he sucked in a sharp breath, hands subconsciously clutching the cloak.

“Keep it for me?” Signe didn’t wait for a response, not that Johan had one. Without another word she flopped down on her back and closed her eyes, and suddenly he was left with her cloak in his hands, silence settling over them. He felt warm, a flush coming to his face and he was suddenly glad that Signe wasn’t watching him. He quickly pulled the cloak around himself and didn’t even care that he caught his long hair in it. He closed his eyes and hid his red face in the cloak, just breathing. It smelled like her.

Then he was back in the cave. His face paled rapidly.

Oh.

Oh.

That was not hate.

That was the complete opposite of hate! Johan had never felt something that strongly before, it felt like his heart was melting. He grabbed his head in despair, crouching down.

“What the fuck.” Note breathed. Johan couldn’t agree more. He looked up at Note, hands still clutching his head.

“She’s in love with Signe.” Johan voiced his newfound horror. “She’s in love with Signe! How didn’t we realize that!” He burst out before stopping himself. “No. No, we obviously wouldn’t know. Who would see that as love?! She was literally following her around asking to fight every single day! How is that- Does Signe know? No, there is no way.”

Johan broke off, groaning. How could he have read the situation so wrong? And what exactly was going on inside Wrath’s head that she would act like that to the person she was in love with?! Joahn didn’t know Wrath very well but still, he knew Signe didn’t see it romantically at all!

“How did I not…” Note despaired. “She’s my close friend…”

Johan ignored him, though he felt a little better knowing that Note, who used to be close to Wrath, didn’t realize it either.

Johan tok a deep breath, they were finally past the mementos.

He froze.

He could hear yelling. It was faint, but it was definitely Signe. Johan saw Note twitch at the profanities clearly aimed at Wrath. He turned to the dark tunnel leading to the adjacent room.

Love or not, Johan didn’t trust Wrath around Signe for a second.