Chapter 1
"There are always a few moments in a person's life when they feel they've seen the gates of heaven open wide. I waited seventeen years, and at my lowest moment, the door finally opened."
Lin Li gazed at his classmate's back in front of him, sighing softly with emotion.
"Do you also have lions hidden in your eyes?" His deskmate Bai Bufan turned his head to look at the suddenly delirious Lin Li and complained, "Lu Mingli, can you use a quarter of your lifespan to help me get a girlfriend? Someone like Jiude Mayi would be fine. If that's asking too much, not exchanging for anything would be fine too—no other meaning, I just purely want to waste your lifespan."
"Bufan, there's already a tragic thick barrier between us now." Lin Li turned his head to look at Bai Bufan, his eyes containing no lions, but filled with lofty, condescending compassion.
Bai Bufan rolled his eyes and clasped his hands together: "Lord Shuren, please continue to go crazy. I haven't finished memorizing the vocabulary for tomorrow's English class, so I need to continue cramming. Farewell."
"Foot fetishist, how disgusting." Lin Li shook his head with some disdain.
Bai Bufan, who had already turned around, took three seconds to realize he was being insulted, then whipped his head back around: "Cramming at the last minute is also considered foot fetish?! You apologize to that saying right now! Also, what's wrong with foot fetishes? Apologize to Arknights players too! Finally, apologize to me for wasting another precious minute of my life!"
"I won't apologize. I prefer Azur Lane."
"I'm very interested in having a thorough XP battle with you, but definitely not during evening study hall. After I survive tomorrow's English class, you'll pay for your ignorance." Bai Bufan sneered coldly, then directly turned his head back to immerse himself in his English textbook.
Lin Li also took a deep breath, then exhaled gently, suppressing the excitement in his heart.
He really wasn't suddenly going crazy.
Just now, he had activated his system—this was a heartfelt sentiment.
This kind of thing had actually happened to him.
This was a system that could lead him to the pinnacle of life, and after observing other people's reactions, he confirmed that at least in this classroom, only he had activated it.
Lin Li was both nervous and excited now. If he weren't in a classroom full of people, his hands probably couldn't help but wander downward while he hummed softly.
After the playful banter with his deskmate, his mood had calmed down somewhat, and Lin Li officially began examining his system.
[Loading 99%...]
It still wasn't fully loaded. Lin Li waited excitedly, almost wanting to sing and dance.
Twenty minutes later, the progress hadn't changed.
Lin Li waited with excitement.
Forty minutes later, no change.
Lin Li waited with a frown.
Sixty minutes later.
Lin Li had entered sage mode, waiting with a peaceful smile, seeing through the mortal world.
All four elements are empty, Amitabha Buddha, no worldly desires.
Your moth—
[Binding complete.]
[Congratulations on successfully binding the Ascension to Godhood System. This system will guide and assist your growth, helping you gradually develop in this strange world and become supreme!]
Your mother is in good health.
Just kidding, this monk will secularize first.
Good, very ambitious! It should be like this! What's wrong with waiting a bit longer? Good things should be like this.
It's like some things originally cost 33.9 yuan, then go on sale for 32.9 yuan. Does this represent the merchant being stingy? This clearly proves it's a good product that can only be discounted by one yuan.
The long loading time represents how much it contains! Its gold content is comparable to the fingers of the Maniacal Laughing Chef God Little Fugui.
It couldn't possibly be a bug, right? What a joke.
The virtual screen in front of him changed to the initial UI.
Very simple: [Status], [Shop], [Inventory], [Tasks].
Click on [Status].
[Name: Lin Li]
[Age: 17]
[Constitution: None]
[Passive Abilities: None]
[Active Abilities: None]
[System Currency: None]
A very simple introduction, with content that was straightforwardly empty.
The system apparently didn't count conventional abilities. Lin Li did have some talents, or perhaps these talents weren't recognized.
However, this didn't discourage Lin Li—it actually made him more excited. If none of his abilities were recognized, didn't that mean only superpowers could be counted? Wouldn't that prove the system would grant him superpowers?
Connecting this to the system's initial message about "becoming supreme," he could become Superman in the modern world! For Lin Li, this was better than those systems that just gave money and power.
Click on [Shop].
[Unlocks after accumulating 300 system currency.]
It seemed this door couldn't be opened from this side for now. Lin Li clicked on [Inventory].
As expected, it was completely empty, though Lin Li was still somewhat disappointed since he had harbored hopes that the system would give him a newbie gift package or something.
It's fine, having a system is already great. Lin Li comforted himself.
It seemed that getting something for nothing wasn't this system's main theme. Lin Li focused his attention on [Tasks], praying in his heart that the system's tasks wouldn't be too difficult.
[Entering the cultivation world for the first time, even a mortal body should have grand ambitions to sweep away all demons in the world, starting from this moment!]
[Task Triggered!]
[Task One: Eliminate ten Lesser Demon Sky Blood Crows that frequently appear around your village and attack and hunt villagers.]
[Reward: Constitution Improvement: Spiritual energy absorption speed increased by 100%; System Currency × 50.]
"..."
Lin Li crossed his hands, placing them under his nose.
Silence.
Something was wrong, very wrong—ninety percent wrong.
Lin Li patted Bai Bufan's shoulder, and when he looked over, asked sincerely: "Bufan, I have a friend who just downloaded a game. For the newbie task, the system told him to kill ten Lesser Demon Sky Blood Crows, but he has no idea where these things are. What should he do?"
"Tell him to ask nearby NPCs." Bai Bufan shrugged.
"Hmm..."
As expected from a good brother, thinking the same way.
"My friend just tried that option, but the NPCs don't seem to know either." Lin Li's expression once again moved toward sage mode, without joy or sorrow.
"Then it's a disgusting forced map exploration game. Your friend better hope the map isn't too big." Bai Bufan waved his hand dismissively.
The map shouldn't be too big—only 510 million square kilometers, and that's not even counting the outer space DLC.
Lin Li's gaze continued to focus on the system.
Actually, it wasn't completely without guidance. The task did mention that those blood crows appear "around the village."
Lin Li was at school—County Key High School No. 1—which had nothing to do with any village.
"..."
Lin Li felt he had to face something and could no longer deceive himself.
His sight locked onto "entering the cultivation world for the first time" and "in this strange world" from the system's initial message.
Looking out the window, the classroom was on the second floor with no particular scenery, same as always, with no spiritual energy revival.
Just the ordinary world he had lived in for seventeen years.
"Heh—" Lin Li took a deep breath.
Could it be...
That he was missing a transmigration step? The more Lin Li thought about it, the more he felt this was the case.
Where in this day and age would there be creatures that dared to frequently appear and hunt humans? Any creature with such audacity would have long been finished off by humans with their truth-seeking weapons.
But...
If he hadn't transmigrated, then this task should be impossible to complete, right?
If it couldn't be completed, then the shop couldn't be activated, and rewards couldn't be claimed...
What use would this system be then?!
Well, after he got Alzheimer's, he could call it up anytime to check his age and name.
His children and grandchildren would never have to worry about grandpa forgetting his own name. Wow, he really was a genius!
That didn't make him feel any... less fucking miserable though.
Lin Li clicked through the entire system interface but couldn't find a transmigration option.
"System bro?"
"Customer service?"
"Tech support?"
"..."
"Daddy?"
"If you don't respond, I'm going to send Earth's coordinates to the Trisolarans!"
Lin Li tried many methods and finally confirmed one thing—this system wasn't alive.
What a backward, incompetent system. Couldn't they even install an AI?
Could it be that the loading failure earlier really was due to a bug?
Silence, incredibly painful silence.
"Bufan, do you know which roads around here have more cement trucks?" Lin Li turned his head mechanically.
Maybe transmigrating now wasn't too late.
"How would I know that? What do you want to do?" Bai Bufan was puzzled.
"I want to make a video where I hide in the bushes and suddenly appear in front of cement trucks when they come by, startling them. There don't seem to be any content creators doing this kind of thing online, so I should be able to go viral." Lin Li said with a bitter smile.
"..."
"Are you talking about the kind of 'viral' where you get cremated?" Bai Bufan gave a thumbs up, then looked at his deskmate with amusement and curiosity: "What's wrong with you? You look constipated."
"I'm having a breakdown." Lin Li spoke honestly.
"Nothing can't be overcome. Go home tonight and work on some calculus—once you derive everything, it'll all be fine." Bai Bufan offered perfunctory comfort. After all, from his perspective, Lin Li had suddenly changed within an hour, which proved it wasn't anything serious.
It was probably just one of those few days that men have every month.
"You wouldn't understand my breakdown—being just one cement truck away from reaching the pinnacle of life." Lin Li sighed.
The system was right in front of him, but it couldn't run.
"No, I should understand you. I've also had breakdowns, and recently too." Bai Bufan's expression became weathered, with melancholic and somber vibes emanating from his body: "Last weekend I finally found a video I really liked, but just when I was about to reach the pinnacle, the internet lagged and the screen froze on the male lead's eyeless face. I gambled everything I had and used all my strength, but I couldn't hold on—it misfired.
Damn it! Damn it! Damn it all!!
Even thinking about it now, I'm still so unwilling! That self-righteous bastard, I'll never forgive him in this lifetime!"
Due to it still being evening study hall, Bai Bufan lightly pounded the desk with his fist, but his expression was somewhat fierce.
"..."
It had to be said that Bai Bufan was a genius at comforting people. Lin Li suddenly found that he wasn't feeling quite so devastated anymore.
Sigh, after all, what he lost was just something he had just gained. Rounding it off, he had merely been toyed with for two hours.
Lin Li couldn't possibly really gamble on cement trucks being able to make him transmigrate—that would be too foolish.
However, after such ups and downs, it wasn't realistic to expect him to settle down and study peacefully. He decided to do nothing, empty his mind, and wait for school to end.
After a good night's sleep, everything should feel slightly better.
However, a blind mosquito came flying over with that annoying buzzing sound and landed on Lin Li's hand.
The classroom was on the second floor, and there had always been quite a few mosquitoes in summer.
I'm already this miserable, and you're still here sucking my blood?
Why don't you go suck Bai Bufan's instead?
If it had been earlier, he might have been willing to treat all the mosquitoes in the room to a feast on his tab, sharing his joy, but now—this is tolerable, but what isn't!
Lin Li kept his left hand still and made a fake motion of scratching his head with his right hand, then struck with lightning speed—
"Smack!"
A corpse in his palm. Since it hadn't sucked much blood, there weren't any bloodstains.
Just as Lin Li was about to ask his front-row classmate for a tissue to wipe his hand, he froze.
[Eliminated Lesser Demon Sky Blood Crow (1/10).]
Huh?!?!
(End of Chapter)