NOVEL WEB Chapter 23
“To be or not to be, that is the question.”
The classic tragic masterpiece, Hamlet. Even if people don’t know the whole story, many know this line.
To briefly summarize Hamlet: Hamlet’s uncle assassinates Hamlet’s father, marries Hamlet’s mother, and takes the throne. Hamlet learns of this from his father’s ghost and seeks revenge, but things get tangled, resulting in his own death after achieving vengeance.
I plan to adapt this in my own way and perform it solo for an audience.
“To be or not to be, that is the question.”
The Murong family’s Tonae Technique has made my body healthy, even boosting my voice. I set a dark tone before delivering the first line, sure it will resonate with the audience at once. I began to act, bowing my head in deep thought.
“My father has passed away. Assassinated by a fiend! The heirship of my father has passed not to me, but to my uncle.”
I immediately revealed the protagonist’s predicament, capturing the audience’s attention.
“Isn’t that the Head of the Seong Family story?”
“I heard it’s a Joseon tale. Just listen.”
Some seemed to catch on already, but it wasn’t important.
“I saw my father’s corpse. The scars left behind can only be made by someone who has mastered the Ha-ga Sword Skills at five stars or above. Strange. Strange. Only two people in our family have mastered the Ha-ga Sword Skills at that level, my uncle and me.”
With a voice full of concern, I posed the mystery to the audience, folding my fan into a pose as if stabbing with a sword.
“This little uncle is the culprit.”
“If you knew, wouldn’t you just kill him?”
“Why are you hesitating?”
From the start, the dramatic storyline had piqued people’s interest. Good reaction.
“My uncle has no children. He publicly declared that he would serve as the Head of the Seong Family for ten years and pass the position to me. If I can endure for just ten years, all the wealth of this Headship will be mine. If I don’t raise doubts in front of people, I can enjoy all the riches in ten years.”
I acted as if walking on a ground strewn with treasures, then I looked skyward and opened my mouth again.
“But!! If that’s the case, who will take vengeance for my father, who wanders unjustly through the afterlife?! Even if I say that my uncle is the only one capable of leaving such scars, no one will believe me. If I kill my uncle, I will become a parricide. Moreover, I would die too… To be or not to be, that is the question.”
It sounded like I was justifying myself to my father, but my face was marked with deep contemplation.
“Isn’t it better to just endure for ten years and become rich?”
“Would you still say that if your father ended up like this? You should seek revenge for your father!”
“My father wanted me to live a rich life, not to die.”
Good. People are starting to understand the protagonist’s dilemma.
Now it’s time for the more provocative parts.
“I confided my worries to my mother. Although she is my stepmother, she must have loved my father.”
I turned my body to the other side, pretending to walk a bit, then I opened my fan.
Hiding my lower face while slightly pushing my behind back, I mimicked a woman’s voice.
“How did you kill my husband so quietly?”
“Uh-oh. What if someone hears?”
Snap! I folded the fan again, turning into another man, my uncle.
This is why I bought the Joseon-style folding fan.
It’s great for showing I’m Joseon and can serve as a trade mark for the messenger. Plus, I can use the fan to indicate shifts in roles by folding or unfolding it.
Truly a versatile tool.
“Only my beloved wife and I are here.”
“Madam. Do you know how hard I worked to gain this Headship?”
“Hehe. So you pushed to pass this Headship to my beloved instead of your own child.”
“Thank you. Madam. My brother was a man who received blessings beyond his abilities. To have a surpassing Headship and such a beautiful woman, both have now found their rightful owners.”
“Does that mean I belong to you now?”
“Ha-ha. Of course! Once I send an assassin to kill that brother’s son, I can officially take you as my wife.”
Having laid bare their conspiracy, I subtly looked at the audience.
“Those scumbags!!”
“How can you be with your sister-in-law!?”
“Honey, my younger brother has been acting strange lately… Ah! Sorry! Don’t pinch me!”
“I feel like throwing up. I can’t believe there are scumbags like that!!”
Good. The reaction is fantastic. Now, finally, it’s time to use my main purpose.
“Heavenly One!! Did you see that scene!!!”
I changed my voice and began acting as Hamurin Prince.
“I want to kill those bastard actors right now!! What do you say?!!!”
I looked at the audience and pointed with my fan at where those two actors had been.
“They must die!!”
“If they don’t, my father will wail in the afterlife!!”
“If they don’t, it’s a breach of filial piety!!”
The audience was roaring with support. Some aunties were shouting, their necks red from yelling.
The atmosphere grew heated.
Now I have to show off a technique.
“But Heavenly One. Even if I kill those actors, there will be no evidence, and I will be executed myself, as I’d be a parricide for killing my mother and uncle. But if I go to the scene of my father’s murder and bring back proof, I can kill those actors!!”
“Hurry!!”
“What are you waiting for!!”
Yeah, I’m going. But I need something first.
“The property of the Headship belongs to those filthy actors. I can’t use those dirty money for my father’s revenge. Heavenly One!! Grant me some travel expenses!!”
I swiftly jumped down to the stage and pulled out a bucket I had prepared. Holding it with both hands, I started walking before the audience.
It seemed the people didn’t understand my actions, showing no reaction.
“Heavenly One! Without travel expenses, I can’t go to my father’s murder scene!!”
Quickly, give me the money. You’ve been listening for free till now.
The tale of the messenger is inherently free.
In this world, there’s no subscription service where only paying people get to hear stories. I can’t just buy a theater and let only those who pay inside either.
So how does a messenger earn money? This is where the trick comes in.
Donation Technique.
It’s the method of receiving money while telling free stories; that’s what the Donation Technique is.
A classic method is stopping at captivating points in the story, effectively cutting it off and offering no further. This leads the audience to drop money into the donation box, motivating the messenger to continue.
However, this method risks a terrible audience reaction if one stops while telling an engaging story. That’s why I created a scenario where the lead character breaks the fourth wall and demands money.
“Hurry and give me the money so I can run to the scene!!”
“I need to stab that uncle!! Here!”
“I was hoping to have a drink later, take this!”
One by one, coins began piling in the bucket. I think it will be enough to enjoy a sumptuous hangover soup.
“Oh Heavenly One! To bless me with such travel expenses, I will rush to the scene!”
With just the right amount of cash, I climbed back onto the stage confidently.
I should be able to employ the Donation Technique three times in this performance.
And thus, I started the remaining tale.
—
“What a touching story.”
“That was entertaining!!”
“Things like this happen not only in the Martial Arts World but also in Joseon!”
“It was a bit tragic, but it was splendid!!”
The story of Hamurin Prince from Joseon was a tremendous success. As the story wrapped up, the audience erupted into applause with astonished expressions.
Ultimately, while tragic in death, the Hamurin Prince nevertheless took sweet revenge before passing. Plus, my coin pouch had become quite hefty.
“Thank you. I’ll be back to share another tale from Joseon every day at this time.”
“I’m looking forward to more tales from Joseon!”
“What a young man who brings tension to the relaxed Chilgok County!”
As the satisfied audience members began to leave, I gathered my coin pouch and stepped down from the stage.
Wow, this is all money I earned.
I used to eat roots in the mountains when I only had a few coins.
The money in the bucket was all coins. However, the weight was substantial enough to be worth exchanging for precious coins.
No matter how good I am at the Donation Technique, no one spends precious coins to hear a single story.
It’s about collecting money from many rather than big bucks.
“I should ask Mr. Wang to exchange this for silver coins.”
This amount would be burdensome to carry around.
But leaving it in the shack would risk being stolen. Exchanging it for larger currency and carrying it in my robe pockets seems the best approach.
—
I went to Mr. Wang to exchange my money and headed toward the shack.
On the way, I spotted an elderly man sitting, someone I hadn’t seen before. In front of the old man was a table, with a sign that read “Fortune Telling” behind him.
If he’s going to tell fortunes, why not do it in the marketplace instead of near the shanty town?
“Hello there! It’s my first time seeing you in this neighborhood.”
The old man with an immortal beard glanced at me and showed no reaction.
This grandfather doesn’t know how to sell. When you greet someone, you respond in kind while explaining your goods. That’s how business works.
“I see you’re doing fortune telling. Have you had good sales today?”
“I hit a jackpot! Actually, I’d like to brag about my accomplishment, but Mr. Wang has been too busy to chat.”
“He said that today he would welcome a very precious guest here, but no one has shown up. Perhaps you would like a fortune told?”
“I may not be well-versed in divination, but I guess I can at least be your first customer.”
The grandfather seemed to hint that he had some sales skills. I might not be a precious guest, but I recognized a bit of sales spirit in him, so I decided to be his first customer.
“There’s a seat available, so please sit. What would you like to know?”
“Since my first venture today has succeeded, I’d like to know if my life will continue to go well.”
I wondered if it was extravagant to indulge in something like fortune telling after surviving a month on nothing but flour bread. But when good fortune comes, it’s only right to extend a small kindness to someone else.
“Alright. I will read your fortune. What are your birth year, month, day, and time?”
“My birth date is…”
Should I mention the birthdate of the future Kang Yoon-ho? Or should I say the date of the mischievous Kang Yoon-ho? Converting the former into the sixty-year cycle would confuse me.
I just mentioned the date of that mischievous Kang Yoon-ho.
“Hmm…”
The fortune teller began to fiddle with some strange tools in front of him. Oh, this is quite atmospheric. This grandfather seems to be more serious than I thought.
“Strange.”
Suddenly, the grandfather looked at me once and resumed fiddling with his tools.
“Hmm.”
He tapped his forehead with his finger, assuming a puzzled expression.
What’s going on? Is he calculating the fees? If he demands too much, I will just flip the table and run away. Please, grandfather.
“You.”
He stared at me with a serious face.
“Yes?”
What now?
“Why is a dead person walking around in this world?”
What?