The Most Random System

"Gosh, what exactly happened," Zhou Baowei asked, somewhat puzzled, "Last semester Lin Li, you helped the class monitor with breakfast a few times, right? You two were still 'strangers' then, so how come this semester your relationship has progressed so quickly and you've become so close?

The class monitor must be confused, has she taken a liking to you? I don't get it, why doesn't she like me? I'm clearly so handsome."

Zhou Baowei let out a deep sigh, his tone full of exasperation.

Lin Li and Bai Bufan both looked at Zhou Baowei.

Some things are just unbearable.

"Should I go first or do you want to?" Bai Bufan asked without turning around.

"You go ahead." Lin Li responded, as the expert should always be the last to show.

"Okay, Bao Wei, you said the class monitor is blind, I agree, but honestly who gave you the courage to say 'why doesn't she like you'?

There's no mirror in the dorm but we have urine, you look like a QR code, people wouldn't know what you are without scanning; how can you confidently claim to be handsome?"

Bai Bufan nodded to Lin Li, signaling that it was his turn to speak.

Lin Li kept it simple, looking at Zhou Baowei and succinctly said, "The doctor took forever to draw your blood, only to find it was lard."

Upon hearing this, Bai Bufan immediately regretted, slapping his thigh.

No doubt, in this round of humiliating Zhou Baowei, he had lost.

"Lin Li, tell me, if I had said 'Bao Wei, when you're with the crew inside the ring, do you try to steal feed from other brothers?', wouldn't that be more aggressive?" he turned, humbly asking for advice.

"Not bad, that's better than the QR code one." Lin Li thought for a moment and nodded.

"What if I tweak it a bit more..."

Watching the two seriously analyzing how to insult him in the most aggressive manner possible, Zhou Baowei remained silent.

Their words were really hurtful.

He was about to explode.

So I ask you, I ask you.

Actually, Zhou Baowei wasn't even that fat, he could even be considered sturdy, his BMI was just slightly beyond the normal range, but unfortunately, his poor choice of friends meant his relationships with Lin Li and Bai Bufan magnified his flaws infinitely, leaving him doomed for life.

"Hey, hey, guys, can I interrupt?" Zhou Baowei raised his hand to stop these two beasts from continuing their research, then seriously suggested, "I think sometimes between brothers, encouragement might be appropriate, after all, I'm quite self-conscious, so I suggest you praise me more."

Facing Zhou Baowei's earnest look, Lin Li laughed:

"Bao Wei, if you want praise, wear a wig, put on lipstick, and post on Little Red Book, you'll immediately have girly compliments.

Wow girl, you've got a great base, don't listen to others, where are you fat? You're the perfect slight plump, just dress up a bit and you'll be stunning."

Bai Bufan laughed too:

"Bao Wei, Lin Li and I are from Tieba, you should understand, seeing someone like you, all we say is 'what a genuine fat pig.'

Little Red Book used to be a platform with barely any male users a few years ago, so under those photos Lin Li found pretty, the comments were often quite vile, sometimes more malicious than those from lustful guys.

Remember one of the Tieba commandments:

When an ugly pig evaluates another ugly pig, it will spare no praise because it knows that no matter how much it praises, it's still a pig, and praising it is indirectly self-praising.

When an ugly pig evaluates a beautiful pig, it will focus on the beautiful pig's shortcomings, while secretly setting the beautiful pig as a goal, hoping to one day become it.

But when a pig evaluates a peacock, it knows it doesn't belong to the same species as the peacock and will never become the peacock, thus it will become aggressive, hysterical, and constantly hope for the peacock's downfall.

At this moment.

Old buddies from Tieba Lin Li and Bai Bufan looked sincerely.

Zhou Baowei felt beyond hopeless.

"I'm outraged, I'm angry, I'm going to cosplay an 180cm sunny day doll in front of your doors."

Bai Bufan: "You're not 180cm, you're not even taller than me."

Zhou Baowei paused, then roared in protest: "Damn!!! On the height issue, you two are even more beastly, I'm not dealing with you anymore!"

And why Zhou Baowei would be so insulted.

Being in the back row, the heights among these buddies were naturally not short.

Bai Bufan was already 181cm at 15, but he always claimed to be just 178cm to outsiders. Lin Li once asked him why, and he said it was to make those who say they're 180cm feel awkward.

To hear this reason made Lin Li marvel.

Genius.

From then on, Lin Li, who believes in lifelong learning, being 186cm, always claimed to be just 183cm.