The Most Random System

If I get caught this time, there'll really be a memorial service.

But Lin Li's condition improves every day compared to yesterday, so he's quite relaxed and even has time to make a face.

Wang Ze wants to chase him this time, but the difficulty is even higher than last time.

And Bai Bufan, whose condition is only a bit better than Lin Li's before, is about to run out of steam and fall behind.

So Lin Li reached out his hand to Bai Bufan.

"Thanks." Bai Bufan grabbed Lin Li's hand, gaining a point of leverage to speed up a little.

Bai Bufan's expression was struggling, but before he could think it through, he found himself hugged by Lin Li.

"Restrain yourself, don't—" Bai Bufan's shy words weren't finished before he felt the world spinning, losing his sense of balance—he was pushed onto the grass by a huge force.

Sitting on the ground, Bai Bufan stared blankly at Lin Li who was laughing wildly as he ran far away, turning to see Wang Ze and others, who now looked like zombies, pouncing towards him.

"Damn."

His last words...

He shouldn't have hesitated when he wanted to trap Lin Li just now.

No hesitation.

...

Bai Bufan's sacrifice was worthwhile, looking at the silhouettes pressing down on Bai Bufan, Lin Li kept a safe distance and nodded with satisfaction.

Running all the time is pointless, better them than me.

Lin Li ran over to Ding Sihan and Chen Yu Ying, gasping and asking, "Do you have any water, can I have some?"

"No water that hasn't been drunk, there's a big tomato, if you don't mind, just eat it." Chen Yu Ying was still searching, but Ding Sihan already handed over the fruit.

Lin Li took it without hesitation and bit into it.

Then he fell silent.

This familiar inedible taste.

Looking down.

Damn it, this isn't a tomato, it's a wild persimmon.

Lin Li had picked it for Qu Wanqiu, and it looked like the worst one.

"Don't take things from strangers casually, got it? It's the last lesson your mom taught you!" Ding Sihan laughed, not at all ladylike, rubbing her belly as she pointed at Lin Li and mocked.

Seeing this, Chen Yu Ying also changed her approach and handed tissues from her shoulder bag to Lin Li.

Lin Li very much wanted to teach Ding Sihan a lesson, but he didn't have much time—the group wasn't far and was chasing again.

Actually, most of the people had run out of breath, but the problem was that the sacrificed Bai Bufan was now assimilated and running faster than a physical test, appearing like he's the one who hates him most.

Taking the tissue and wiping his mouth, Lin Li continued his escape.

...

The net of heaven and earth is large but not loose, Lin Li couldn't escape death.

After watching the ads for resurrection, the charcoal was already hot, water droplets would sizzle intensely inside, they could start the barbecue.

"Who's going to barbecue?" Lin Li looked at Bai Bufan and Zhou Baowei.

The three of them basically had no experience in this area, nor anyone passionate about barbecuing.

So there was silence.

"Bao Wei, you do the barbecue, consider it an exercise for losing weight."

Lin Li and Bai Bufan mentally agreed to make Zhou Baowei do the tough work.

"Whose lose weight through barbecuing? I have my own weight loss plan, barbecuing is a part I must evaluate, so you guys do it." Zhou Baowei clasped his hands behind his back and shook his head.

"What weight loss plan requires evaluating barbecue?" Bai Bufan frowned.

"Military style body management, can only eat military hot pot, veteran barbecue, handgun drumstick, colonel nugget, battleship sushi." Zhou Baowei said loudly.

"Picking up chopsticks makes a soldier; is the aim to develop a general's belly?" Lin Li agreed, whether process or result, it all seemed quite military.

"Exactly, Lin Li, I, Grand General Zhou, appoint you as the tea serving soldier, now go to the self-service area and serve tea to your general." Zhou Baowei nodded heavily.

"What kind of general are you, are you pretending to be the sun?" Bai Bufan scoffed.

"I see you want to eat seaweed soup without ingredients, flowers, nor more soup, Bai Bufan, I now order you to split troops and attack the enemy food store by yourself." Zhou Baowei ordered arrogantly.

Then General Zhou got beaten.

Finally, the three decided to settle this by rock-paper-scissors to determine who would barbecue.

"Rock-paper-scissors!"

Zhou Baowei put out paper, Bai Bufan and Lin Li both put out rock.

"Congratulations winner, you've won the privilege of barbecuing!" Before Zhou Baowei could laugh, Lin Li and Bai Bufan spoke in unison.

Zhou Baowei: "..."

"Who wins, who barbecues?" he questioned.

"Otherwise?"

"Scram! Let's get the rules straight this time." Zhou Baowei couldn't accept it.

"Then still, whoever wins barbeques."

"Fine."

Agreed, the second round started.

"Rock-paper-scissors."

Second round, Zhou Baowei put out paper, Bai Bufan did a vertical gesture of six, Lin Li raised his foot.

Zhou Baowei: "..."

Damn it.

These two are even worse this time.

"What the hell are you two doing this time? Huh?" Zhou Baowei questioned.

"Haven't you watched 'Ultraman R/B'? This is the joy gesture, I'm a peace-loving person who dislikes disputes, I hope rock-paper-scissors can coexist peacefully, so among us, it's a draw, I can't win, so one of you definitely has to barbecue." Bai Bufan said kindly with hands together, looking like he's been petted like a pure kid by Nangong Wen Ya.

"You avoid the sandstorm?" Zhou Baowei waved his hand, full of resentment, then looked at Lin Li, who raised his foot, sneering and questioning, "What's this foot of yours, joy foot?"

"I lost, to both of you, you two work it out, call me when the barbecue is ready." Lin Li dealt with it calmly.

"You lost and where's your currency for passwords?" Zhou Baowei's eyes widened.

Lin Li sighed, looking at the ignorant Zhou Baowei: "Bao Wei, if hands and feet fought, who would win?"

"How do we even compare? Who says that feet have to lose? The power of a flying kick is way stronger than a flying punch, so I probably lost!" Zhou Baowei analyzed for a while.

"No, when hands and feet fight, you'll definitely want hands to win and end up hitting feet," Lin Li calmly said.

Zhou Baowei: "?"

Damn.

Had no choice but to support hands winning.

No denying it, the feet really lost.

...

But since no one could convince the others, the three of them decided to take turns grilling.

"Come and see, come and see, authentic Xinjiang lamb skewers~~" Lin Li was the first, smearing oil on the meat skewers and rolling them on the grill, loudly shouting with an accent.

Grilling skewers is quite fun—at least at first, it is.

"Lin Li!"

"Eh! What's up? Ding Sihan, do you want to be my first customer?" Hearing Ding Sihan's voice, Lin Li turned his head to look at her as she approached and asked.

He saw Ding Sihan holding a skewer, handing it to Lin Li: "This is Ying Bao's skewer, she's too shy to give it to you herself, so she asked me to bring it for you to taste."

Lin Li snickered.

Recently got fooled by Nakano Kaki's trick due to being thirsty and not expecting Ding Sihan to have evolved so quickly. Such an obvious trap this time, how could he fall for it?

"Monitor, did you grill this?" Lin Li directly shouted over to Chen Yu Ying to confirm.

As expected, Chen Yu Ying shook her head.

"Damn it." Caught in Lin Li's provocative gaze, Ding Sihan stomped her foot angrily.

"Here to find someone to test for poison, huh?" Lin Li snickered.

"Without someone testing it, I'm too scared to eat it myself, I don't even know if it's cooked, blah blah blah." Ding Sihan stuck her tongue out at Lin Li.

"For poison testing, you should ask Bai Bufan, he's professional." Lin Li continued his actions, nodding towards Bai Bufan, who was cutting aluminum foil on the side.

"Huh?" Ding Sihan didn't understand.

"Bufan once said that his family is a eunuch family, with ancestors frequently serving as eunuchs, always aligning themselves with Wei Zhongxian, so poison testing should be their inherent family skill; if he's not professional, who is?" Lin Li shrugged and explained.

"Really... a eunuch family?" Ding Sihan exclaimed, amazed.

Can a eunuch have a family? In the dramas she watched, didn't all those major eunuchs only have adopted sons?

So impressive.

"Really, I saved the chat records. Ah Ding, if I'm lying to you, I'll lose my Xiaodingding." Lin Li nodded.

Ding Sihan: "..."

But now she had to believe it.

Seeing Ding Sihan's sneaky glances towards him, Bai Bufan gritted his teeth and said with some embarrassment and anger:

"Lin Li, how long are you going to keep reminding me of a slip of the tongue? I meant to say my family is an official family! The Bai family tree often had people become officials! Accidentally typed it as 'eunuch' instead!

And it's generational loyalty, not mother**king generations of Wei Zhongxian!"

Who knew there was such a big difference between an official family and a eunuch family?

The most disgusting thing is, Lin Li clearly realized my slip of the tongue instantly but chose to save and forward the chat record before notifying me about it, he's not human at all.

It was then that Ding Sihan finally understood the situation and could barely hold back her laughter.

"Try it, Lin Li." After laughing, she still felt more familiar with Lin Li and pleaded.

"I don't want to die." Lin Li refused, keeping his mouth tightly shut.

"Just a bite, just a bite." Ding Sihan tugged at Lin Li's sleeve, acting cute.

The gap between Ding Sihan and Chen Yu Ying is as ridiculously big as the gap between Bai Bufan and others.

"Stop acting cute, I'll eat it right away." Sighing, Lin Li took the skewer with a resolve to face death.

Just as he was about to put it in his mouth, he saw Zhou Baowei coming back from the bathroom, so Lin Li handed the skewer over: "Here, it's cooked, give it a try."

"Thanks." Zhou Baowei nodded, took a bite, and frowned, "Seems like it's not cooked."

"You heard him, it's not cooked, go back and increase the grilling time," Lin Li said to Ding Sihan.

"Thank you!" Ding Sihan nodded and ran back.

Lin Li resumed grilling.

Having come to his senses, Zhou Baowei glared darkly at Lin Li.

"It's one thing to have me test for poison, but why did she thank you, Lin Li...?"

Lin Li laughed, and Zhou Baowei sensed something was wrong, but before he could stop him, he heard Lin Li shout: "Ding Sihan, come over for a moment!"

"What?" Ding Sihan jogged over again.

"Say thanks to Baowei, he tried the skewer for you, but you thanked me, he's not happy," Lin Li said earnestly.

"Oh, okay, thank you, Zhou Baowei!" Ding Sihan thanked Zhou Baowei.

Zhou Baowei felt no joy, only a lifeless awkwardness: "I was joking..."

"Oh, it's no big deal." Ding Sihan nodded and ran back again.

After Ding Sihan went back, Zhou Baowei's lifelessness transformed into tangible murderous intent.

Lin Li's health bar started flashing.

"Our skewers are cooked, really cooked, let's eat first." Lin Li turned and said, trying to salvage his own life.

Zhou Baowei nodded.

Let's eat first.

Kill later.

"Hold on, I'll plate it up." But Lin Li stopped the two from taking the skewers, then used tongs to take a piece of meat the size of a fingernail, placed it on foil, and poured a splash of vinegar, gracefully stirring with a spoon before placing two cilantro leaves beside it.

"This dish is called—Dragon Flying Phoenix Dancing!" Lin Li finished with a sprinkle of salt, concluding perfectly.

Bai Bufan approvingly nodded: "Gets the Michelin three-star vibe, this dish feels like it's at least worth 198."

"Didn't see any dragon, didn't see any phoenix, only saw a single dance." Zhou Baowei disliked Michelin, especially French cuisine.

Those portions, even if he ate them for a month, wouldn't yield two Maltesers.

Thinking of that, Zhou Baowei turned to see Wang Ze eating Maltesers nearby and shook his head in disgust.

Wang Ze, popping two Maltesers into his mouth: "?"

What's going on?