The Impeccable Adventure of the Reluctant Dungeon

A few hours earlier…

“From here on, you three will look after each other,” Liandra told the trio of still yawning adventurers. The end of the spell had woken them up, though not fully. “We’ll try to break the curse for you to go back home.” She turned to Avid and Amelia. “Send a message to the hero guild the first chance you get. Understand?”

“What about you?” the duke’s daughter asked. “And Baron d’Argent?”

“We’ll be fine.” The heroine smiled.

“Consider it part of your adventurer’s training,” the avatar added. “Any seasoned adventurer needs to know when to stay and when to go. This is the time to go.”

“But—”

A sharp glance on the baron’s part quickly made her stop.

“I’ll take care of them,” Ulf said in a somber tone. “Just try to make it out alive.”

“Do I look like someone who’d lose? I defeated Lord Mandrake and his goblin fleet. How hard could this be?”

No laughter followed. What had started as a training adventure with a grumpy, though skilled, mage to gain enough proper experience had quickly devolved into a hopeless situation. There was nothing they could do to help. The baron and the heroine were on a whole different level, not to mention that none of the adventurers could even imagine what it meant to fight an abomination. Facing the guardian was terrifying enough.

“Yes,” Avid said, the words piercing through his fear. “It can’t be that hard. You already froze half of her. All that’s left is the rest.”

“And you.” The avatar pointed at Octavian. “You better keep them safe. I expect you to fly them out the moment the curse is broken. Right?”

The griffin squawked, flapping its wings.

“Good enough,” Theo mumbled beneath his breath, then went back into the underground corridor.

The tone was firm enough to make anyone comply. Unfortunately, the baron had managed to go overboard, taking all three of the adventurers, and the griffin, beyond the realm of compliance and into the fields of heroism.

The trio remained still and silent until the noise of Theo’s grumbling was gone, then counted to ten.

“There’s no way we can just sit here,” Amelia said, breaking the silence. “This is the greatest adventure in history, and I won’t be remembered as the girl who remained tucked away in the underground dungeon while the world was saved from an abomination!” She crossed her arms. “Right?” She turned to Avid.

“The world’s not in danger…” he replied. “But you’re right. We’ve been nothing but baggage so far. At least outside, we were able to smash a few gargoyles. In here…” He sighed. “Still, we must do something.”

“Let me tell you a little secret.” Ulf placed a hand on Avid and Amelia’s shoulder. “There are many types of adventuring. Don’t compare yourself with the baron or the heroine. Both of them are tough as nails. Adventurers must know their limits. Like Sir Myk.”

“Sir Myk saved Rosewind from a goblin invasion,” Avid corrected.

“I’ll give you that. He’s a powerful guy. One of the best adventurers I’ve seen. He’s no hero, though. It was Baron d’Argent and Liandra that took down the goblin fleet. Sir Myk didn’t even try that, and do you know why?”

Everyone looked at the bulky adventurer expectantly.

“Because he knew his limits and also when to grasp his opportunity. We’ll do the same.”

“In what way?” Amelia leaned closer towards him.

“Avid’s right. We can’t take on the abomination. We shouldn’t have any trouble with skeletons. The baron and the heroine are going for a frontal assault. Meanwhile, we can stealthily sneak from behind and wait for the precise moment to tip the scales in their favor.”

“Like thieves.” The duke’s daughter snorted.

There was nothing noble or adventurous in the suggestion. At best, it fit the actions of a hero’s comic relief companions ever-present in all the literary sagas. Nine times out of ten, it would be the least popular among the children who got stuck with that role, while the popular ones pretended to be great heroes in their games of make-believe.

“How many adventure quests have you been on so far?” Ulf grunted.

“One,” Amelia admitted. “But I’m extremely well read.”

“Just like Avid here.” Ulf laughed, giving the earl’s son a pat on the back. “I’ve been on dozens. Boars, goblins, wolves, even dungeon exploration once. They’re nothing like this, but they weren’t a piece of cake, either.”

Amelia opened her mouth for a moment, then closed it again without uttering a sound. She couldn’t deny the truth. What was more, she had to admit that they had been rather lucky so far. Reading about the glorious adventures of heroes was easy. Doing it first hand—not so much. Although she’d go to her grave denying it, deep inside, Amelia had been a nervous wreck on their previous adventure. All the training in the world hadn’t prepared her to kill a person, even if it were a wanted brigand. Despite his arrogance and obnoxious behavior, Ulf had been through that.

“So, what is our moment?” Avid asked.

“I’m glad you asked.” Ulf smiled and reached for his neck.

A fine copper chain was hanging there, hidden by his shirt. Hanging on it was a rather unique earring made of black silver. Based on the intricacy of the design, one would suspect that it was very old, possibly belonging to a noble lady. Time had left its mark, making the dolphin shape barely recognizable.

Taking it off, Ulf rubbed the earring, then moved it away, leaving it dangling on the chain. Before everyone’s eyes, the dolphin was surrounded by a soft blue glow.

“Those two aren’t the only ones with magic items,” Ulf said, slowly moving his hand, as if in search of something. While he moved, the glow changed intensity.

“What is it?” Amelia asked.

“A treasure earring,” Ulf replied. “Comes from my mother’s side of the family. It has the ability to sense the treasure, especially the path leading to it.”

“So, we are like thieves,” Amelia grumbled.

“Depends on the point of view. I’ve found that where there’s treasure, there are other useful things. Doesn’t your father have a vault of magic items?”

“Father hasn’t let me in the vault. He just gives me what I want, so I never had to go there.”

“You’ll have to trust me on this, then.” Ulf paused. The earring seemed to glow the brightest while his hand was extended in the direction of one of the walls. “Every noble family keeps its valuable heirlooms in its treasure vault. I’ve seen Avid’s, so I know.”

Amelia turned to the young noble, a shocked expression on her face.

“We were children,” Avid sighed. “I wanted to show off. We were caught by the earl’s guards and punished.”

“That just means that we’ll need to be more careful.” Ulf gripped the earring tightly in his hand, then charged at the opposite wall.

Everyone watched in sheer confusion as the large man shouldered the hard surface, causing an entire section of it to fall in. A slam followed accompanied by a cloud of dust, revealing an entirely new passage going further in. Apparently, there actually was a proper passage to Memoria’s tomb’s chamber. Baron d’Argent being a mage who could create passages in walls, had simply never bothered to find it.

“See?” Ulf pointed triumphantly, as he brushed the dust off his clothes. “All we need is a torch.”

Avid and Amelia looked at each other.

“No torches?” Ulf asked. “Not even anything that glows?”

“We never got our gear,” Avid noted. “The whole point was—“

“Always keep something handy.” Ulf said with a slight sigh. “I thought you knew all that stuff. Now I see why the baron is grumpy all the time.”

In truth, the main cause for Theo’s grumpiness was his interaction with people. If it hadn’t been for his condition, the dungeon would have kept his avatar within his body, blissfully focusing on his newly discovered hobbies—tunnel reconstruction, underground gardening, and the occasional bout of slime chasing. Since none of the adventurers had a means to know that, they were ever more convinced they were the cause of his dismay. It couldn’t be denied that was a burden—given the enemies they faced. Adding to that, their experience lacked, and they were yet to start thinking on their feet. So far, only the baron had come up with any actual ideas, each more impressive than the last.

“You’re right,” Avid stood up. “It’s time to stop playing around.”

The young noble glanced at the single floating fireball that Baron d’Argent had left in the room, then took off his shirt.

From personal observation, everyone was clear that the seemingly innocent light source had the power to singe everyone in the room, should it explode. Even so, in a bout of misplaced bravery, Avid went beneath it, then tossed his shirt over it.

Ulf and Amelia froze. The horror of what they had witnessed had rendered them incapable of speech. Completely oblivious, Avid pulled the ball of light down, then tied the sleeves of his shirt together.

“Now we have light,” he said with a reassuring smile.

No one said a word. Confusing the silence for agreement, Avid went on.

“And we can use it as a secret weapon if we come across anything.”

“That’s…” Amelia stuttered, but was unable to finish her thought.

“Good job, Avid,” Ulf didn’t give her a chance to continue. “I’ll take that. You stay behind with the griffin. He listens to you best.”

Octavian tilted his head sideways at the remark.

“Sure.” Avid swung the wrapped fireball, moving it towards Ulf. Keeping his calm, the large man swiftly, but cautiously, took hold of the sleeves with the same care, as if he were handling a set of crystal vases in a backpack.

Equipped with a portable light source of sorts, the group ventured into the new corridor. The space was narrower than the standard corridors they had traveled along so far. Just comfortable enough for a single person to pass, it didn’t seem to have any obvious traps. Without the baron present, there was no telling whether there were curses, but the trio could hope that the blessed soles of their shoes would provide adequate protection. In any event, it wasn’t more dangerous than tugging a fireball along.

The further along they walked, the brighter the glow of the earring became. Suspiciously, not a single skeleton emerged along the way. Anyone more cautious would have thought that they were walking into a trap. The suspicion was further compounded when the group came upon the first metal door. It was rather large, made of enhanced iron, with a complex locking mechanism that contained more gears than could be found in the whole of Rosewind. The only catch was that the mechanism lay bare.

“There’s no doubt.” Ulf brought the earring close to the door. The piece of jewelry shone so brightly it rivaled the muffled fireball. “The treasure’s on the other side.”

The large adventurer waited.

“So, we just need to go there?” Amelia asked.

“Yep.”

“Then, why aren’t we?”

“The lock is on the wrong side.” Ulf tapped the large mechanism.

“And?” Amelia crossed her arms in typical fashion. “We’re sneaking our way through the back door, remember?”

“It just… It doesn’t feel proper. The adventurer thing is to pick the lock and go in, not the other way around.” He looked at the door. Shaking his head, he then pulled an all too visible latch within the mechanism.

There was a loud click, after which the door loosened.

“Be ready,” he said, letting go of the shirt that held the fireball. “There might be guards inside.”

All three adventurers readied their weapons. Even Octavian sharpened his claws on the stone floor. Time appeared to have frozen.

Ulf grabbed hold of the door and briskly pulled it open. Everyone pressed against the walls as much as they could, focusing on what was in the chamber beyond.

“Gold?” Amelia whispered.

She was absolutely correct. It wasn’t a small amount of gold either, but a hoard that would rival a dragon’s. Bars, coins, and lots of jewelry pieces were neatly stacked, creating an image from an adventure saga, only tidier.

The group had seen many extraordinary things since Baron d’Argent had accepted the noble quest, but this seemed the most extraordinary of all. Even among nobles and adventurers, this seemed too good to be true. If nothing else, the way in which it was meticulously ordered screamed illusion.

Suspecting the worst, Ulf took out a hidden dagger and threw it inside. The weapon bounced off a stack of solid gold bars, then fell to the floor. Nothing changed.

“Do you think it’s safe?” Amelia whispered.

“Doesn’t matter.” Slowly, Ulf stepped in the doorway. “That‘s the only way forward.”

One by one, the trio entered the treasure chamber. Unlike the corridor, it was a lot larger than one expected. Three quarters of it were completely filled with gold, stacked in the exact, neat fashion they had glimpsed from the corridor. The rest of the space was reserved for pathways between the gold stacks and wooden racks on which rings and necklaces were displayed, the same way jewelers would present their merchandise.

“That’s a lot of treasure,” Avid admitted. It made everything his father owned, even before he had to give most of it to the baron, look like pittance.

“You don’t say.” Ulf tapped a bar of gold with the tip of his sword. “I bet even the baron doesn’t have this much.”

“It’s not that much,” Amelia mumbled, making it obvious that her family didn’t have that much, either.

“They’re all arranged by jeweler and year,” Avid said, examining a rack of necklaces. Small silver plaques were placed beneath each, containing a name and a year. Most of the names didn’t mean a thing, but a few sounded vaguely familiar.

“Someone must love their jewelry.” Ulf smirked.

“Do you think they’re cursed?” the young Rosewind asked.

Ulf let the earring hang from its chain again.

“It’s fine. If there’s any cursed treasure, it’ll turn red.”

“I don’t see any weapons,” Amelia noted.

“And you won’t.” Avid pointed at a brass sign above a doorway. “I think those are there.”

Looking around, there were a total of four doors, each on a separate wall. The door they had come from had a single tear, or drop of blood, depending on the interpretation. The one Avid had noticed—a shield and a sword. Opposite the armory, the last sign had what appeared to be a picture of a person.

“That should be the exit.” Ulf glanced at the only door without the sign. “Or entrance, rather. That means we go to the armory.”

“Won’t the weapons be cursed?” Avid turned towards him.

“There’s one way to find out.” The adventurer grinned, then made his way forward.

The room in question was just as large as the last. The only difference was that instead of stacks of gold, it was filled with endless displays of weapons, shields, and armor. In the vast majority of the cases, a full set of gear was placed on a wooden dummy—with a description, of course. There were styles and weapons of every type, from the mercilessly practical to the exotic and the outright absurd. In the far corner of the room, as if placed there in an attempt to be hidden, were two racks of swords.

“Everything seems fine,” Ulf said, observing the glow of the earring. “Take anything that’s useful.”

The fascination kept its hold a few more seconds, before the realization hit in; despite all the riches and glitter, they remained in the underground tunnels of a cursed estate. At this very moment, Baron d’Argent and Liandra were on their way to face an abomination of blood, if they hadn’t reached it already.

Choosing from unknown weapons wasn’t particularly efficient without an identification scroll, but even the young nobles were capable of getting a feel of weight and balance. Each of them tried several swords and found that all of them were crafted rather well. There was a reason why the weapons were kept in the treasury.

“Fire Empress Kaylara,” Amelia read from the plaque of a scandalously revealing armor set. “It must take a certain type to wear this into battle.”

It was as if the creators of the armor had gone out of their way to make it impractical. Given the proportions, more material had been used for the helmet, sword and daggers than everything else. Despite that, one had to admit that the weapons of the set had a certain allure to them.

“Magic warrior set,” Ulf said at a glance. “They don’t need much armor.”

“I bet,” the woman said in a mocking tone. Curiosity made her draw the sword from its sheath. It was more saber than sword, light and flawlessly balanced. The grip felt comfortable and warm to the touch, tempting Amelia to swing it around.

Performing a few basic swishes, the woman followed up with a forceful thrust. A ball of flame shot out of the tip, hitting the side of another display and engulfing it in fire.

“Wow.” Amelia’s eyes twinkled as she, ever so slowly, moved the tip of the blade up towards her face. “I’m keeping this!” She glanced at Ulf and Avid again. “Just the sword!”

A hurried series of mixing and matching took place in which the adventurers ruined sets of armor, only taking the pieces they preferred. There was no time to take on a full set, so it was only the important things that counted.

Once everyone was set, it was time to check out the final room. Given how the vault had been constructed, it was logical to expect a selection of scrolls and other personal magic items. That would have been quite beneficial. Finally, they would get rid of the dangerous light source they were dragging around and replace it with a glow ring, a lantern, or something even better. All that changed once Ulf opened the door.

A row of wooden displays covered the far wall, all containing neatly arranged books, scrolls, and assorted magical items, yet it was something else that drew all the attention—a single person standing in the center of the room. The moment he saw her, Ulf stopped in his tracks.

“Baroness?” he asked, blinking.

There could be no doubt Baroness Elderion was indeed there, still as a puppet. Being addressed, she turned in Ulf’s direction, yet didn’t say a word.

“What are you doing here?” the adventurer couldn’t help but ask.

For a moment it almost seemed that the noblewoman might respond, but before she did, another person suddenly materialized a few steps from her. The new person was none other than the baroness’ own butler, who seemed just as calm about the whole ordeal as his mistress.

“Are you here to rescue us?” Amelia asked with a grain of hope. Yet, even as she voiced it, the hope quickly faded away. If anyone were to rescue them, it would hardly be a noble and definitely not from the cursed estate’s treasury.

Almost on cue, a third person emerged—once again from the baroness’ household. Then another, and another.

As people started filling in the empty room, the realization dawned upon the trio of adventurers. The sign above the door wasn’t a metaphor, but the literal description: this was a room for people—part of the ruby ring’s new ballroom collection.

“The earring.” Amelia pointed.

Ulf looked down at the chain in his hand. The dolphin dangling from it had turned crimson red.

“Very slowly, step back,” he whispered.

“Cursed?” Avid asked as he obeyed.

“Uh-huh.”

More and more people emerged, now in groups of two and three. Whatever curse had affected Rosewind was spreading.

Slowly, Amelia stepped across the threshold, leaving the room. Suddenly, the attitude of every newcomer changed. In perfect unison, all glared in the direction of the adventurers. Then, all charged in the direction of the door.

“Run!” Ulf shouted, as he shoved Avid out, then quickly followed, slamming the door shut.

“What happened?” Amelia asked.

“Cursed people aren’t supposed to leave the room. The moment you did, they took us for intruders.”

“Well, we are…”

Ulf didn’t listen, looking around for something to block the door with.

“Quickly!” He leaned against the door. “Drag some bars here!”

Blocking a door with gold bars was by all accounts extravagant, but as the saying went: when life gives you gold, you’d better do something with it.

Avid and Amelia rushed, carrying several bars at a time, tossing them at the door. It was extraordinary how much speed adrenaline could provide. In what seemed like seconds, enough gold was stocked to cause some difficulty in opening it.

“We must warn the baron,” Amelia said, running with more gold to add to the pile.

“We don’t even know where he is,” Ulf countered. “And even if—”

Another door creaked open. Looking in the direction of the sound, the group watched the unlabeled door swing open and two skeletons emerge.

“Shit!” the large adventurer grunted, as the new batch of cursed people pushed against the door in an attempt to get into the main section of the treasury.

The two skeletons weren’t equipped with any particularly good gear, although they remained tough enemies as far as the adventurers were concerned. The only silver lining was that there didn’t appear to be many of them, although it was also possible for that to be just the first wave.

“Avid,” Ulf said over his shoulder, while pressing against the door with both hands. “You warn the baron. We’ll handle things here.”

“But—” the young Rosewind began.

“He’s your mount,” Amelia interrupted, glancing at the griffin. “You keep telling me he’s useful. Now prove it!” She thrust her newly acquired sword in the direction of the approaching skeletons.

A ball of fire engulfed the minion, melting it on the spot. Unfortunately, there was no time to rejoice. Just as one skeleton had been destroyed, two more appeared from the entrance.

“Just go!” Ulf yelled, pushing against the door. “We’ll be right behind you!”

In the place of a response, Avid too swung his sword. A bolt of lightning struck the skeleton, instantly reducing it to a pile of bones.

“You’d better be,” he said. “Take care, okay?” He then turned to Amelia.

“You too.”

At the same time, the chaos engulfing the town of Rosewind was progressively growing. Cursed letters, no longer content with being picked up by intended victims, were flying about in search of new prey. Initially, they remained somewhat timid, clinging to people’s feet, tempting the unfortunate target to open them. Everyone that did would instantly disappear, finding themselves teleported to the abomination’s cursed estate. And as more people vanished, the more aggressive the behavior of the letters became.

By the time Spok emerged near the earl’s castle, the pieces of cursed paper were outright chasing people, flying right into their faces. One brief glance proved enough to release the curse, which in turn only caused more letters to appear. All the noble houses were spitting them, creating torrents that moved about the town.

Theo, like everyone else, had noticed, quickly sealing off all doors and windows of the buildings that were part of him. The action, though terrifying, provided the best possible protection to everyone inside. Unfortunately, that left half the population vulnerable… including Earl Rosewind.

“Close all doors!” Spok said as she ran through the main entrance. “The windows too!”

“Huh?” the pair of guards asked in near unison.

Now that there were no goblins attempting to invade, their job was mostly ceremonial to the point that they let all notable people in town freely enter the main hall. Normally, a few words would be exchanged, but none of them would dare stop someone as well known and important as Spok d’Esprit from running in. In this case, before they could even manage to respond, a pair of letters stuck to their faces, causing them to vanish.

“The letters don’t appear to have reached the earl’s castle, sir.” The spirit guide used her telekinesis to shove away a few letters that made an attempt to follow her inside.

“You could have fooled me,” Theo grumbled from the woman’s necklace. “How can you tell?”

“They’re trying to get in.” Spok pulled the massive doors shut with the ease one would close a book.

Barring it, the woman quickly straightened her clothes, as etiquette demanded, then turned around to continue along the main hall. Normally, the behavior she had displayed would be considered a serious faux pas by nobles, guards, and servants alike. For better, or likely worse, in this case, there was not a single person present to criticize.