The Half-Puny Priest Hopes To Retire

8 – Breakout

someone said

Crying when it’s hard is third-rate, enduring when it’s hard is second-rate, and eating when it’s hard is meat.

Is there any other quote that more adequately expresses mankind’s craving for animal protein?

That overwhelming feeling of fullness that can never be replaced with vegetables or fruits has sustained human life in general.

Furthermore, it even naturally presented us with a blueprint for a more prosperous life.

In order to cut and eat meat, humans held knives in their hands.

To roast and eat meat, humans invented fire.

To provide a regular source of tasty meat, humans began grazing livestock.

Yes.

It is no exaggeration to say that human evolution began in front of a meat grill.

”You’ve waited a long time. customer. Ordered Minos fillet steak and red wine from Baltina. Please have a good time.”

He expressed his gratitude to the waiter by handing a small tip along with a friendly eye salute.

Since it is the first table for Gu Seong-jin to meet face-to-face in half a year, it must be the duty for the person being entertained to have their own formality.

Chi profit. Sizzle.

The oil splashing over the meat is like a colorful fireworks display.

The emotion that made the occasional sound of cooking meat feel like an ensemble of an orchestra became a transparent drop of dew and moistened my eyes.

Soft and chewy potatoes. Sour bacon. The past days when I filled my stomach with poor stew that had nothing but starch.

Perhaps all of those things were seasoning for the emotion of this moment.

Looking back on it later, the primitive demonic nature of thick meat was terrifying, to the extent that sloppy logic, nothing more than bullshit, dominated thinking.

His nose was clearly tingling, and both hands holding the tableware trembled as if they were holding heavy dumbbells.

I don’t think my heart was shaken this much even when I faced a dragon the size of a mountain in an unexplored region of the sea.

Oh right, I fainted then.

With an exhalation, I removed the nameless thought from my chest, and carefully pushed a piece of meat cut into rather large pieces into my mouth.

The harmony created by the enchanting smell of fire from the well-cooked surface and the moist and tender meat is truly a violence of taste.

The thick gravy that overflowed in my mouth with every bite left me with a fascinating stimulus that even fragrant red wine couldn’t wash it all away.

Even on the way down through the throat to the esophagus, the presence of the meat, which retains its original wildness, made it difficult to endure a frivolous exclamation about to burst out.

”I’m glad you’re alive…”

These were words that came from the soul, not from the mouth.

In my previous life, I often wondered why extreme vegetarians are always so angry.

I can’t eat this delicious food, so of course I have to.

So, with a newly realized truth of this world as a side dish, let’s cut another piece of meat and put it in our mouths.

Quaang!

The bloody blast that crashed into the quiet restaurant without warning paralyzed my self-consciousness, which was peacefully enjoying the peace.

”Even though I called dozens of bee hawks for emergency contact, there was no news, so I wondered where and what they were doing…”

gulp.

Immediately after that, the green tone of annoyance felt in the familiar voice pulled the string of tension that was already tight.

”How was it? Did you enjoy your long vacation? Of course you must have enjoyed it. You must have been busy with fun and enjoyment, to the point where you wouldn’t hear anything like my emergency calls.”

again and again.

By the time the sound of mechanical footsteps gradually increased in volume reached behind me and patted my back.

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Kwajik!

As she stabbed the meat on my table with a fork, she uttered the words in a bloody tone that was unmatched among those I’ve ever heard.

”answer.”

”Hey… First of all, can you put down that fork and talk about it…? Sister…?”

◈◈◈

I felt a bit of anxiety that this shouldn’t be the case, a so-called remorse of conscience.

After reading the nun’s urgent call to stop what I was doing and return home as soon as possible, I knew best that my crimes were extremely serious.

However, with the vacation I was given after half a year, and the freedom I don’t know when I’ll be able to taste it again, how many great people are there who can proudly scold me for not being able to take a step back?

As it is self-evident that any grown-up man, as long as he is wearing the mask of an office worker, will resent the lion’s roar if he takes away the vacation he once gave.

In order to enjoy the long-awaited golden vacation, I think there is some room for extenuating judgment in my judgment in the great flight of tears.

”If you can’t speak…”

The cold and sharp words of the nun, reminiscent of icicles under the eaves, repeatedly stirred up my conscience.

I thought there would be no more trust between us to lose.

Seeing that the nun’s demeanor was noticeably colder than before, it seems that the friendly relationship between me and the nun was drawing a much smoother curve than I had imagined.

Well, that’s a thing of the past.

”Wrong. please forgive me. I am reflecting enough. Please take a look.”

”····”

look There is not even a reply to the sincere apology.

As if to make fun of my miserable appearance, the metal sculpture hanging from the mound of my neck twisted my body.

An ugly object that is too bulky to be called a necklace, and is commonly referred to as a leash.

Excluding some races with special tastes, the feeling of being forced to go to one’s destination while being forcibly dressed in metal attachments that one would not want to wear around one’s neck even if given billions of dollars was quite noble, but was there anything special?

All of this is a disaster brought on by my actions.

”I swear to God that I’ll never run away, can you at least loosen this leash?”

”no.”

With a firm tone as if she were disciplining a misbehaving puppy, the nun fixed the handle at the end of the leash around my neck.

buzz buzz.

The surroundings became noisy.

The image of a nun taking a priest wearing a leash for a walk by the village roadside with a calm face would be a spectacle worth seeing.

If it was someone else’s business, I would have laughed at it from a distance and used it as a snack to cheer up my dull daily life.

”No, but what the hell happened, do I even have to be called out because I’m off duty? In preparation for any contingencies, he even prepared a substitute twice as capable as me… Honestly, if it’s a problem that friend can’t solve, it won’t matter if I step in…”

”It was because of that ‘a talented pinch hitter twice’. If you have time to mumble, please step or speed up. Rage’s Guardian Priest.”

”····?”

◈◈◈

I’m out of ice I am out of my mind.

These are expressions that I have often seen and heard in various creative works.

Perhaps this is the first time I have seen a specimen that can be said to be the epitome of it with my own two eyes.

”Is this alive?”

Pointing at the familiar man who was standing on the white stone floor and staring blankly into the sky, he asked the nun to explain himself in detail.

It was like seeing a wax figure made by an artisan.

I don’t know if that’s a bit of an awkward expression.

The man in front of me was unnaturally lacking in the signs that a living person should have, to the extent that one would inadvertently understand that it was a stuffed living human being.

Lovell Wright. Commonly known as the Light Novel priest.

Even if it was just this morning, it might be a good thing for me that he, who was busy talking nonstop, transformed into such a taciturn person in a short time.

Depending on how he came to be like this, it was a situation where I might have to take care of the aftermath, so I couldn’t just be happy.

”According to the doctor’s diagnosis, breathing and beating are all stopped, but some metabolism and pupillary reflex are functioning properly. In fact, the first discoverer, the maid, seems to have assumed that he died of a heart attack.”

Indeed, that was the reason why some maids were weeping and holding their portraits outside the chapel.

Even if he didn’t know anything else, he was a gentleman who was as considerate of his people as he was.

If you say that you have left this world, there will be a lot of guests who will shed tears.

”How could holy water or prayer not work?”

”We tried to heal by gathering together the highest-ranking priests, as well as the highest-ranking priests currently on standby in the chapel, but both attempts did not have much effect. It’s because he can’t even figure out how to define the abnormal condition that has happened to his body in the first place.”

okay.

Then it seems like you’ve done enough, so you can just give up cleanly and count on getting a well-looking mannequin for free.

I was about to say that, but when I saw the expression on the nun’s face, who frowned and looked uncomfortable to anyone, I decided to keep my mouth shut.

If I could add one thing, neither I nor the nun were particularly worried about the future well-being of this living corpse.

The point we are concerned about was the aftermath that would occur if this nobleman became a dead corpse.

He is a son of a prestigious aristocratic family that donates billions of dollars every year to the Holy See, and a young prospect who has a good reputation externally thanks to the elements that inevitably attract attention such as his tall appearance and outstanding talent.

If rumors leaked to the public about a mysterious death in the middle of the capital, not even in a remote area of the dungeon, it would be clear that the high-ranking officials of the Vatican, who are crazy about money and honor, would frown and make a fuss.

The nun and I are still in a high rank, so we can secure a safe range enough to protect ourselves from that vicious beast.

It was obvious that unfair and unreasonable punishment would be inflicted on those who performed relatively low-level jobs directly or indirectly related to the death of Priest La Novel.

It was fortunate that the punishment of excommunication was at least possible, but the tragedy of the case spreading to the Inquisition and the whole family being dragged into prison due to guilt-by-association was likely enough.

”ha····.”

As if she couldn’t bear to say harsh words while wearing the holy nun’s uniform, the nun uttered a low slang word with only the shape of her mouth and let out a deep sigh in the air.

‘I didn’t mean to entrust the work to that idiot.’

I wasn’t particularly good at lip-reading, but it wasn’t hard to understand that the nun’s words were overruled.

”I really want…”

Severed breath escaped from my dry lips.

Now that things have turned out like this, there was only one way I could get out of this dizzying situation.

He is the one who turned Priest La Novel into a living mannequin, and also the source of all the worries and worries that afflict me.

It is safe to say that there was no way to ameliorate this total predicament other than to negotiate directly with her and coax Priestess La Novel back to normal.

And unfortunately. Unfortunately. Not too lamentable.

The theory of the person who is most likely to succeed in such a skill in this position.

Other than me, who is her exclusive guardian priest and who has a great crush on her for unknown reasons, there was no one who deserved it.

”… Priest.”

”it’s okay····. I won’t run away…”

Did he judge that there was a risk of escaping after seeing me who was moaning from an unexpected headache while washing my face?

The nun called me out in a worried tone.

However, contrary to the nun’s concerns, she didn’t even dare to run away this time.

It’s not like a sense of mission. To classify it, it is guilt.

To save myself, to escape without knowing I was helping a bomb that might send the lives of several people to hell.

The human nature called me was not that harsh.

Is it a disaster that can never be eradicated unless humans give up their herd life?

Today, I felt as if I had taken another step closer to the truth of this world.

”No, but what the hell did that nobleman do, to make such a blunt and indifferent saintess upset like that? What, did you stuff a green pepper into your mouth?’

”I do not know. However, from what I heard, he told a few close classmates that he would go around boasting that he would become the saintess’s exclusive possession starting today. Perhaps, he eloquently spoke similar words and actions in front of the saintess…”

”What…”

It’s not like some bastards are electing class presidents.

how long has it been like that

Having come to the self-evident conclusion that I couldn’t just be discussing at the table forever, my heavy body kicked into place, defying gravity.

trudge.

The place where my weary steps, reminiscent of an office worker on a Monday morning, stopped was the holy sanctuary where the person of interest was hidden.

It was the throne room of the saintess.