The Great Hero is a Schoolteacher

Chapter 24: The Weight of My Guilt



I lifted Catalin’s body, struggled to get her across my shoulders, and carried her back to the camp. Chess was distributing my surviving gear between the two remaining bags. They looked at me in amazement and sorrow.

“Ma’am? What are you doing?”

“She’s alive.”

Their face saddened a bit more and they shook their head.

“We both checked for a heartbeat, ma’am. I hate to be the one who must state it clearly, but the Almighty be my witness, Catalin Robi is dead.”

Tears ran down their pale cheeks. They wiped them with a fist. Were they sad at Catalin’s apparent death, at my denial, or both?

I sighed. “Look, Chess, it may sound crazy, but I have the power to know certain things. You saw it. I knew where to look for Turoch Garnet’s house, I knew Teo’s horses were saddled against all odds…”

“But not this time. It’s your sorrow speaking. You don’t want her to be gone and…”

“Please listen!”

My voice echoed through the undergrowth. Chess startled and stared at me, visibly pained and lost. They must think I’m beyond reasoning. How can I convince them that I’m not insane?

I breathed in and out, trying my best to look calm.

“Catalin’s under a curse that gives her the appearance of death, but she’s not really dead, not yet.”

Chess frowned. “Does it mean you want to carry her to… wherever we’re going?”

I shook my head. “We’ll bring her to a witch who lives a few hours’ walk from here, in this direction.” I pointed to the northeast, where I could feel the presence of a cottage, even though I had no idea what it looked like. “The witch might be able to lift the curse. This is a slim hope, but I’m not giving up on it. I’m not giving up on her.”

Chess looked at me, at Catalin, at both bags and at the forest around. “Ma’am… Great Hero Al… There’s no talking you out of this, is there?”

“Exactly. I proposed to her by accident, I drew her into this massive disaster, and now, I can never look at myself in a mirror again if I don’t try everything to save her.”

“Deep inside, you know it’s too late, don’t you? I remember praying for such a miracle, but there was nothing to do, and…” They bit their lower lip and blinked away another tear.

They’re only a teenager and they’re not done mourning. Just like Princess Nigella.

I smiled. “This miracle I believe in, Chess.”

They nodded slowly.

“Then my duty, as your escort and as your friend, is to follow you, until… Either we do save her, or you realize it was a delusion from the start and Catalin joined the Almighty.”

We took a bag each and left the camp.

“Ma’am, are you sure you want to carry her yourself?”

“I have to. It’s my fault she got cursed, so it’s my duty to bring her to the witch.”

But even a frail young woman like Catalin weighed on my shoulders, so after we got out of the forest, I needed a break. I sat down on a rock and drank the last drops from my water bottle.

Chess took a long look around. There were hills around, and no visible activity, let alone a squad of soldiers looking for us.

“If we follow the topography, we’re likely to find a river at the bottom of a valley. We’ll refill our bottles there.”

I nodded. “Sounds sensible. I trust you.”

“Will you allow me to carry Catalin for a while?”

I looked down at my fiancée. Her delicate face was just as beautiful in blue-black as it had been in pale pink. Could I let Chess relieve me? My back and shoulders already hurt and we weren’t even halfway yet.

“All right. Thank you, Chess.”

As they walked next to me, with Catalin’s body across their shoulders, I couldn’t help feeling horribly guilty. It’s all my fault if we have to carry her all day. I should carry the burden. I have no right to complain. But I didn’t speak. I was too scared. What if Chess decided to stop helping me? What if the witch couldn’t lift the curse after all?

We did find a river, where I refilled our three water bottles. We were hungry, but we didn’t have time to hunt or gather food, so we ate all the berries we could find on our way, provided Chess confirmed they were edible.

I don’t even know which berries are poisonous. New worlds should really come with a travel guide, to make up for all the years of learning-as-you-grow-up that you didn’t get before being thrown right into the action, naked and clueless.

All day long, we took turns carrying Catalin. Despite our doubts, our hunger, our despair and our pain, we kept walking. We stayed away from the main roads. The day before, walking in the open had drawn soldiers right to us and this time, if we came across a squad, we wouldn’t be able to run away. Besides, we didn’t want everyone in the area to claim they saw two strange travelers carrying a dead body.

My feet were sore and my mouth was dry. I tried not to think too much. Keep focused on the task, Alicia. I want my fiancée back. I want to make up for the harm I caused her. The dragon can wait. It’s been five days, so we have five more, and, oh, well, Kossi’s not engaged to me, is he?

By the end of the afternoon, I knew we were getting close. The landmarks looked familiar even though I’d never seen them before. I knew we had to follow this narrow path between two meadows, and the witch’s cottage would be at the crossroads. Knowing without remembering. It was a strange feeling to my little human brain.

“We’re almost there,” I said.

It was my turn to carry Catalin and my whole body ached.

Chess took a long look at the young woman dangling over my shoulders like a weirdly shaped shawl. “You know, I’m beginning to think you’re right.”

“About what? Catalin being alive? I told you I knew.”

They nodded. “And I didn’t believe you. I still don’t, not really. Sorry about that, ma’am, but I think the least we can do in our situation is to be honest with each other.”

They’re right. And they’re a wonderful person if they accepted to carry Catalin all day, even though they thought it was pointless.

“It’s okay, Chess. You’re entitled to your own opinion. But if you’re mentioning it, it means something’s different and you might be changing your mind.”

“Yes.” They stayed silent for a couple of steps, then they took a deep breath. “I’m sorry, ma’am, but it’ll sound gross.”

“Go ahead.”

“Here’s the thing. If Catalin was dead, she should be getting stiff by now. Obviously, she isn’t.”

“Because she’s not dead,” I said between my teeth.

Chess nodded.

“I really want to believe it too. She doesn’t deserve to die, and we don’t deserve to lose her. But fate can be so meaningless and painful sometimes.”

They looked in the distance, their face slightly away, so strands of black hair hid their expression from me. Catalin’s curse must trigger all sorts of terrible memories for them. Where was Chess when they learned about Prince Sorosiel’s death? Who told them? Did they even get to see the body before it got cremated?

“I’m sorry,” I whispered.

“Don’t be. It’s not your fault I lost someone. Catalin herself lost two siblings over the past five years. I suppose you lost people in the past, too, didn’t you?”

My uncle Robert. My ex-mother-in-law. Three of my four grandparents, but they’d lived full lives.

“Never anyone so close and so young. It seems both of you are more used to grieving than I am.”

A couple walked in the other direction, probably coming from the cottage. Both were Zimeons. The woman was heavily pregnant, with pure white hair tied in two long braids. The man’s hair was shorter and the color of cinnamon, matching his skin. They both wore loose clothes with rich patterns in white, red, green and black.

I never saw Zimeons outside of Carastra, and the only one I really interacted with was Catalin. They all wore neutral colors and acted so discreet… These ones look like they own the place, and I should assume they do.

I nodded as we walked past the couple. They gave us a long puzzled look, but they didn’t slow down or ask questions. The woman only whispered “Good luck” in passing.

They know where we’re going. They’re probably back from seeing the witch, too. About their unborn child, perhaps.

The path sloped down to the crossroads where we could now see the thatched roof of the cottage. The whole place looked eerily English, with cob walls, flowers near the front door, and what looked like a vegetable garden in the back. The whole scene had a small patch of forest as a background. As we walked on, we saw half a dozen people, all Zimeons, waiting on a row of benches outside the house. They stared at us, but I met their gazes and straightened to hide how tired I was.

They must be wondering what terrible harm we did to this girl. Well, she’s not just a girl, she’s my fiancée, and I’m here to save her life.

Chess and I sat down on the last bench. There was some chatting in low voices, but no one talked to us. I was fine with it, feeling too exhausted to engage in conversation. I held Catalin in my lap, supporting her upper body with my arms. Her head rested against my shoulder.

“We’re here,” I told her. “I’m bringing you back no matter what it takes.”

After a while, a Zimeon woman came out of the cottage and gestured at a family to come inside. Then she looked at the benches, noticed us, and walked straight to us. She was probably in her fifties, with a full figure majestically draped in a colorful dress, and all kinds of trinkets tied to her long blue hair. She took a look at Catalin and cringed, eyes narrowed, ears curled forward.

“What do we have here?”

I’d have liked a greeting, but she’s the witch here, and as far as she’s concerned, I’m no Great Hero, just some random human bringing a badly cursed Zimeon to her door.

I tried my best at curtsying without standing up or hurting Catalin.

“Good afternoon, madam. This is Catalin Robi. We’re engaged.”

She frowned. “Engaged? Really?”

I pulled at our twin necklaces, her braided trim and my chain. Each of them carried two pendants, the wooden one Catalin had engraved and the Mera blossom I’d bought in Merumo.

These flowers were supposed to bring us good luck. What a pointless superstition!

“We found a grimoire during our journey. Catalin was studying it, but there was an accident and she touched it with her bare hand. The curse did this to her. She has no breath, no heartbeat. We came to you so you can save her.”

The witch put her hands on her hips. “No breath, no heartbeat? What makes you think she’s not dead, human?”

“I know it. And I also know you can lift curses. I beg you, madam, Catalin deserves a better fate, so please help her!”

She wrinkled her nose.

“You look awfully self-confident, human. You brought harm to this poor Zimeon girl and you expect to walk out of it without suffering the consequences. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have honest people to look after.”

She turned around in a whirlwind of petticoats, headed back to the cottage and slammed the door.

Chess looked appalled. “This is it? She’s refusing to heal Catalin?”

“No, she’s not. She’s refusing to heal the wound in my pride.”

And it sounds fair, to be honest. I deserved this slap to the soul for not treating Catalin right.

“What do we do, now, ma’am?”

Everything it takes.

“I’ll be humble. I’ll show we’re not here to ease my ego, but to lift the curse on a brave and brilliant young woman. I’m going nowhere without Catalin, anyway.”

The afternoon ended. I rocked my fiancée gently, promising it’d be fine, we’d find a solution. I told her stories from my past in my native world. Teenage love stories that now tasted like sweet nostalgia. Stan, my ex-husband. What I’d loved in him before realizing the rest of him wasn’t so lovable.

Why didn’t I tell her all this before? Why didn’t I trust her earlier? I need someone close. I can’t go on being some people’s hero and other people’s traitor, with no one I can call a friend.

The witch came out a few times, to fetch all her clients. Or were they patients?

When the last one was gone and night began to fall, she didn’t call us in. We stayed alone on our bench, the three of us. Chess listened to my stories, but Catalin was the only one I was really talking to. I sang songs to her, music I’d danced to when I was her age.

It makes no sense. She doesn’t understand English, and neither does Chess. The lyrics will never mean anything to them.

I yearned to share my secrets with her, but I was running out of ideas. I wished very hard she could be there to ask questions. I was hungry, I was exhausted. But no matter what happened to me, Catalin Robi had to be saved.

The night was pitch-black when the door of the cottage opened again. The witch appeared on the threshold and waved at us.

“If you’re going to sing in strange foreign tongues all night, come in!”


Tip: You can use left, right, A and D keyboard keys to browse between chapters.