The Gloomy Saintess Obsessively Clings to Death

I usually eat without much interest, just sort of nibbling here and there.

Mr. Death doesn’t really need to eat, after all.

But somehow…

The person sitting across from me,

who has gone to so much trouble for me,

is eating the food I prepared with a visibly deflated spirit…

“…I wonder if they can’t tell whether this food is being eaten through the nose or the mouth.”

And besides…

“Saint, you should be looking at the food, not me.”

“Ah!”

The saint froze mid-action, holding an utterly untouched fork at the edge of her lips.

Then, blushing and averting her gaze, she lowered her head sheepishly.

Right.

This has been happening repeatedly since a while ago.

With a gaze so heavy with reluctance, she kept looking at me rather than the food,

half-opening and closing her mouth as if deliberating, again and again.

Whenever our eyes met for a moment, she would pretend to focus on eating, only to glance at me again a moment later.

If I didn’t know the reason why she’s behaving this way,

I might have let it slide.

But knowing the reason makes it hard not to be distracted.

I looked at the steak placed in front of the saint.

It had gone completely cold, and more than half of it remained uneaten.

“…At least what she’s managed to put in her mouth, she’s chewing… sort of.”

Under normal circumstances, the saint would have exclaimed “It’s so delicious!” with twinkling eyes after every bite.

But since she isn’t doing that, it’s difficult for me to adjust.

While forcing down a piece of the steak, I reaffirmed my resolve.

“It won’t do, no matter how uncomfortable it may feel. Meals end quickly. I am Mr. Death. You’re a living human, there is a line we must maintain.”

This, too, shall pass.

This, too, shall pass.

This, too, shall pass.

“I understand. Let’s sleep together tonight, together.”

“…Eh?”

The saint’s eyes widened as she turned her gaze toward me.

Soon her face brightened and she abruptly set down the fork in her hand.

“Really?”

“Just tonight. Starting tomorrow, we’ll really sleep separately.”

A fleeting look of longing crossed the saint’s face, but she soon nodded quickly.

Maintaining a solemn expression, I continued.

“And, Saint, the bed will be yours, I’ll take the floor…”

“The floor is too cold; it’s not safe.”

The saint firmly cut me off, her voice and her eyes leaving no room for compromise.

“Then…if we sleep together on the bed, we can distance ourselves just enough to ensure we don’t touch…”

“…Not touch?”

“…We’ll just hold hands, alright? Really, I can’t back down further than that.”

“Alright! We’ll just hold hands!”

Looking at the saint happily nodding, a mixed wave of emotions passed through me.

I’m not quite certain whether this was a good decision or not.

I sighed and offered the saint a piece of steak at her mouth.

“…So, please try to eat it properly. Even if it’s cold, it might have lost some flavor.”

“No. Even if it’s cold, it’s delicious.”

“Did someone who just now find it so unappetizing manage to eat that way?”

“Uh-heh…”

The saint popped the piece of steak I offered straight into her mouth.

As her joyous exclamation eventually echoed, an odd sense of relief washed over me, followed by a deeper sigh.

“…So this is why I lost.”

Even though I don’t understand why sleeping next to me feels so happy for her,

watching the Saint brighten up instantly made me smile for no reason.

“Anyway… Since we’ve agreed to just hold hands, nothing major should happen.”

…That thought shattered within five minutes of us lying down together.

I stayed as close to the wall as possible, extending one arm toward her.

As the saint lying on the bed quietly pressed her head against my arm, I quickly pulled away.

“…We agreed to just hold hands, right?”

“…Uh-huh.”

The saint carefully and tenderly grasped my hand as if it were something precious.

The warmth emanating from her fingertips itched at me in a strange way.

As the saint yawned and rubbed her eyes with fatigue,

I could no longer resist saying goodnight.

“Sleep well, Saint.”

“…Uh-huh… Sleep well… Mr. Death…”

She didn’t even finish her farewell before immediately falling asleep.

The various sounds of her breathing echoed in my ears, causing mine to gradually close as well.

Just as a yawn escaped my mouth, the saint softly released my hand in her deep slumber.

“What? And you were making such a disappointed face earlier.”

Stealthily turning, I took a glance at the saint.

Her expression while sleeping peacefully seemed happy somewhere.

Judging from the slightly upward curve of her lips, she was likely dreaming something pleasant.

“Guess it’s alright after all.”

All that was left was for me to fall asleep as well.

I stifled a smaller yawn and prepared to turn back around.

“…Umph, it’s cold.”

The yawn turned into a sigh at the recurrence of the same situation.

In the blink of an eye, the saint had tightly wrapped her arms around my waist, pulling me closer.

I inwardly screamed at the sight of the saint.

“…But my waist isn’t a hand!”

Today, I didn’t want to end up being a bear-hugged pillow again.

But every time I tried to move, the saint’s arms tightened as if unwilling to let go.

And…

Maybe it’s because the sleeping clothes are too thin and light.

The soft and gentle texture feels even more noticeable compared to last time.

“…Please. We agreed just to hold hands today, Saint!”

I silently and gently pushed the saint away in an internal plea.

But the saint resisted, digging even deeper into my arms.

“Maybe I should wake her up?”

I decided to shake her shoulder lightly—but upon turning my gaze—

“…Pink.”

The scene right in front of me suddenly made me involuntarily let out a long sigh.

The moonlight streaming through the lace curtains was shining too openly.

I slowly raised my gaze to the ceiling, covering my face with one hand.

Oh, those curtains, that sleepwear.

Why isn’t the strap doing its job?

And why is the moonlight shining so unnaturally bright tonight, illuminating everything vividly?

Even if I’m completely ignorant of human modesty, I should know that particular area should not be visible to someone unrelated.

I debated putting the strap back where it belonged but decided to firmly close my eyes.

“…I’ve seen nothing.”

I spent the whole night with my eyes closed… No, with my eyes tightly shut.

Even after the saint had adjusted her clothes, I desperately continued to pretend to be asleep.

*

Something’s wrong.

Is it because my connection to the otherworld has been severed?

There was a time when I regularly stayed awake for weeks on end while on duty.

So why am I so exhausted today after just one sleepless night?

“…Could it be some sort of mental fatigue?”

In the end, I abandoned the task of digging into the baggage in the pocket dimension, opting instead to collapse on the floor.

I tilted my head to and fro, glancing around.

The chaotic marks of my supposed cleaning process seemed to mirror my inner turmoil, filling me with a vague bitterness.

“Clearly, I started this to sort things out. So why is it getting messier?”

The disarray created by scattering belongings all over the place only made my already cluttered mind feel even more muddled.

“Ah, so this is why humans buy furniture.”

Drawers, decorative cabinets, wardrobes.

When I casually observed human furniture stores before, they’d seemed incomprehensible.

Why would they need so many kinds of storage units? Why would they purchase all these items?

But now, I get it.

The purpose of all this furniture is a sophisticated strategy to cram all sorts of unsightly clutter into one spot and hide them away neatly.

“…Should I just stuff everything back into the pocket dimension? Would that even finish anytime soon?”

Even the contents within the pocket dimension were far from exhausted.

From here or there,

no matter which side I thought about tidying up, my head throbbed and I had no inkling where to start.

With a resigned sigh, I surveyed the messy room.

No matter how I thought about it, I didn’t feel motivated to make a single move right now.

“Ah, forget it. Let future me do the cleaning.”

I rested on the chaotic floor, momentarily closing my eyes.

The soft, warm sensation against my cheek made me furrow my eyebrows.

The familiar scent that followed subtly drew my eyes open.

“…Eh? What is this?”

“Hmm? Oh, you’re awake?”

When I opened my eyes, I saw the saint.

The saint had my head resting on her lap, reading a manga book.

The page-turning sound and the swish of the pages filled the room with a peaceful atmosphere.

Even the way she kindly looked down at me was tranquil.

I was about to drift back to sleep under this feeling of ease when I abruptly sat up.

“Why am I resting my head on Saint’s lap?!”

“Oh, well… I guess the pillow I provided was uncomfortable. You kept tossing and turning, so I gently placed your head on my lap.”

The saint hid her mouth behind the manga book and chuckled softly, “puhuhu.”

“Fortunately, you instantly fell back asleep.”

“Oh, thank you… Wait, no, please don’t do that next time.”

The saint slightly pouted upon hearing my words.

“Mr. Death is at fault. How could you possibly lay down on the bare floor like this in the winter without anything supporting you?”

“…I was just tidying up and got lazy after a bit, so I just closed my eyes for a moment.”

“Ah, I see… So for Mr. Death, daytime turns into nighttime, and that’s what happens in a ‘moment.'”

“…Huh?”

The window which had been empty earlier now had a pitch-black curtain.

And furthermore,

when I rubbed my eyes and looked around, the room had miraculously become clean.

Just moments ago, everything was thrown about in disarray, creating a chaotic mess.

Now, nothing remained messy except for the manga book by the saint’s side.

And also the pillow lying next to me and the blanket covering my body.

“…This blanket isn’t mine either.”

I awkwardly set the blanket aside and looked around.

In various spots around the room, shelves, bookcases, and display cabinets stood neatly, with my belongings properly organized in their spaces.

“…What is all this?”

“Hmm? Oh, I cleaned it up.”

The saint closed her manga book, slightly nodding her head to the side while smiling as if nothing was unusual, though she looked subtly pleased with herself.

“I’m sorry for going through your things without permission. But everything looked so disorganized, and nothing seemed too important or off-limits…”

“…Ah, yes, that’s true.”

“Huh, figured as much about Mr. Death.”

All important items were safely stored in the pocket dimension, out of harm’s way.

But then she guessed it correctly.

Somehow, it felt peculiar that she knows me too well, making my feelings twitch slightly.

So, out of discomfort, my body twisted awkwardly while absentmindedly scratching the back of my neck as I asked.

“…Where did the shelves and furniture come from?”

“Hmm? There were so many things scattered around, and you have a lot of stuff, so I hastily made them. They might look a bit rough, but they should be sturdy enough.”

“Ah, I see.”

Can furniture just be “made” like that?

Not quite in the know, I merely nodded.

“In any case, thank you. You’ve saved me from a lot of trouble.”

“Heheh, then, as a token of appreciation, how about—”

“Yesterday was the last day we sleep together, remember?”

“…Tch, alright…”

The saint pouted her lips and fixed her gaze on the manga book.

The slow pace of page-turning clearly indicated that she wasn’t concentrating but was hiding her sulky feelings.

A lump rose in my throat as I tried to start a conversation, but yesterday’s memories surfaced, making me stop.

I quickly turned my head and adjusted my expression.

“…Let me read some manga.”

I picked up a manga book I had left untouched in the pocket dimension.

As I immersed myself in reading, I felt a weight on my shoulder.

Glancing down, the saint had stuck close and was staring at me.

“…What’s wrong?”

“Mr. Death likes cute and intricate things, huh? These books are like that too.”

…Well, since I mostly read these kinds, injuries and bloody situations are avoided.

I picked them because they were popular and seemed interesting, but the first chapter of one had such violent scenes that I couldn’t sleep for a while.

After that, I started picking these gentler stories.

Though occasionally, I’d fall for something labeled as “healing material”, only to discover a “fatally harmful item.”

Maybe you’re wondering if this suits a grim reaper.

I unknowingly asked in a slightly subdued voice,

“…Do you dislike them?”

“Umm… No, I like them because they’re cute.”

“If they suit your tastes, feel free to read whenever you wish.”

“Uh-huh.”

But…

Why are you looking at me instead of the manga?

I shifted my gaze back to the book and subtly changed the topic.

“Did you have breakfast?”

“Yeah. I piled up some food on the side… oh, but if you’d like to eat too—!”

“No, it’s all yours Saint, so feel free.”

The saint ignored the answer and continued to directly look at my face intently.

Unable to withstand her continuous glance, I finally glanced sideways briefly.

“…Why are you keeping your eyes on me?”

“Because I like it.”

…Do you mean you like the food being served?

I was about to ask but hesitated, fearing her answer, so I turned my head down and focused on the book.

“…Let me ignore it and focus on the manga.”

Focusing on something seems to calm the restless feeling in my heart.

I deliberately brought the book closer to my eyes and fixed my gaze.

But unexpectedly, the soft touch wrapping around my waist made my heart skip a beat.

“…Impossible.”

Anxiety struck me, and I glanced down sideways.

The saint had wrapped her arms around my waist and fallen sound asleep with a gentle breathing.

“But we agreed!”

“Mm… It’s warm…”

The saint mumbled in her sleep and pulled me even nearer.

The sight left me speechless but made me chuckle helplessly.

“Augh, I shouldn’t be allowing this every time. Why do I let myself get pulled in each time?”

The laughter soon turned into a sigh.

It’s kind of frightening how these moments are becoming increasingly familiar.

I softly stroked the saint’s hair and simply stared at the ceiling.

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