Chapter 62: I Am Thou
Opal clapped at Silva, Polyetta, Ada, and Silv, the four contestants left in the tournament. The spectators all cheered, impatient to see the rest of the tournament unfold.
"You managed to get far, I do not doubt that you all have your chances to win. For the first round of the semi-final, Silva and Silv will be the first to fight."
Silva and Silv both went toward the ring. Silva knew she could win easily in a physical fight, but she still worried about what Silv would throw at her. The two girls faced each other in silence, waiting for the fight to officially start. Silva's heart raced in her chest, her respiration faltered, and her body quivered slightly. She would have preferred to avoid this moment forever, the moment to fight her other self.
"For our first fight of the semi-finals, Silv against Silva. May the best win!"
The fight officially began. Silva took a short moment to brace herself and ran toward Silv. She was ready to end this fight as soon as possible, not letting a moment for Silv to think about a strategy. Silva put all her strength into a kick, hoping it would knock her other self in a single hit. Silv was visibly not expecting the attack to be so painful and her body tried its best to even stand up.
"That hurts... So that's how your parents felt."
"What?" Silva flinched and took a step back in shock "That's not... I didn't..."
While her opponent was lost in her thoughts, Silv attacked her and tried to push her outside of the ring. Silva managed to step away but was visibly unwell. Trying to forget Silv's words, she decided to attack her with a punch that was dodged at the last moment.
"You're so slow, no wonder you couldn't help Neige."
"Shut up, don't think you can win with just your words!"
"Really? It seems effective for me. You can try to act tough, but I know you more than yourself. You're like me in the end."
Silva tried to land another attack but was immediately avoided with a simple sidestep.
"What are you talking about? The only thing we share are four letters in our names!"
"It's just that you can't accept it. When you saw your parents die, you felt happy, right?"
Silva stepped back and took her head in her hands, reminiscing about a past she tried to forget.
"No! Of course not! I'm not a monster! I'm..."
"You're like me! In the end, you just are an egoist monster too! You can try all you want, but you can't be the righteous person you pretend to be! Chaos is your fate!"
"Will you shut up!?"
Silva tried to attack Silv but her movements were as confident as her heart was. Silv managed to dodge everything easily, even managed to hit her a few times in the process.
"Deep inside you're kinda like the people you try to stop. Can you really say that you could sacrifice Neige if it meant that the world was safe? Could you-"
"Shut up! Why do you keep talking!? I never asked you anything!" Silva suddenly stopped attacking and fell on her knees, exhausted "I... I'm trying to be a good person... I swear..."
Memories of her past came to her, of her parents that she disappointed, of her friends that she couldn't help, and of the failure she felt she was. She knew she had to fight, that those were only words, but she couldn't.
"You try, but it's your fate to fail. You know very well that we're only a burden to those around us. Your blindness, your past, yourself, everyone would feel better if we both were away, don't you agree?"
Silv took a knife from her pocket and threw it on the ground in front of Silva.
"If you truly care for those around you, you know what you have to do."
Silva took the knife in her hand without thinking. She thought about all the lives around her that changed because of her. The fate her parents encountered, Neige's disappearance, her other self, everything went back to her.
"If I didn't exist... Everything would be different..." Silva silently muttered to herself while running her finger in the sharp blade. For a moment, she considered a world without her, without all the problems she could cause.
"Hey, get up!" Yelled Sepide from the crowd "Why are you staying down? The fight is not over!"
Silva heard her words but wasn't reacting. Absorbed in her own world, she had all her focus on the blade she was holding.
"Hey stop! You better not hurt yourself anymore! I don't want anything to happen to you, so please stop! It hurts me to see you like that!"
Silva stopped when she heard her friend's crying words. She stood up a bit confused, until she noticed her blood on the blade. The knife fell from her hands as she opened her eyes in shock realizing what happened. Her arms were covered in her own blood, with wounds deeper than she ever felt before. Seeing that, Silv let out a sigh, a bit disappointed.
"If only this bitch wasn't there, I could have gotten rid of you right there..."
"Hey! Don't call her that!" Silva took back a fighting stance despite the pain in her arms "Why does it hurt so much? It's not that bad usually..."
Silv took back the knife on the ground, visibly ready to end things once and for all.
"It's alright, I'll finish what you started."
Silv attacked Silva but the latter managed to dodge. Silva tried attacking back but the pain stopped her in her tracks. Not only it was in her arms but her heart itself hurt her after each of her heartbeats.
"I swear it's not that bad usually... It hurts so fluffing much..."
"Fluffing? You can say fuck you know? Our target audience isn't kids."
Silva tried to land a kick that sadly didn't hit its target. her opponent tried to counter-attack with her blade but she managed to barely dodge it.
"I can't punch and you dodge my kicks, but we'll see if you can avoid a headbutt!"
Silv was bewildered about Silva's words, she wasn't expecting her to announce her plan. But Silva wasn't stupid, she planned to throw her off by kicking her by surprise and hoped it would hit this time. She went closer, ready to attack. Silv prepared to dodge a kick but instead was hit by a headbutt to her surprise. The violent blow sent her straight to the floor, causing immense pain to her.
"I thought you would kick!?"
"What would you think that? I said I would headbutt. Maybe you thought I would change my mind? Seems like you don't know everything after all."
"Did you think about kicking me on purpose, only to throw me off?"
"Maybe."
Silv tried to wake up but her body refused to move, violently hurt by the hit. Opal started a countdown out loud, if ten seconds passed, Silv would officially lose.
"One, two, three."
The crowd yelled the numbers along with the tournament organizer, excited to see who would end up as the winner.
"Four, five, six."
Silv wasn't expecting the hit to be that strong, even Silva slightly moved her head while having her eyes half closed. The hit from her head along with the blood loss was affecting her. She was in no state to fight and would definitely lose if Silv stood up.
"Seven, Eight, Nine."
Despite all her best efforts, Silv couldn't stand up. She accepted defeat, relaxing her exhausted body, and closed her eyes. Silva smirked when she saw her victory and whispered the number along with Opal and the crowd with satisfaction.
"Ten!"
The crowd cheered and yelled Silva's name, making Opal's announcement barely audible.
"Silva won by knockout, Silv stayed on the ground for ten seconds."
A guard came to take Silv while Sepide and her leader came running toward Silva.
"Silva, are you alright?" Sepide asked with dry tears on her cheeks.
"My favorite color is seven..." Silva said with an empty gaze toward the sky.
"She probably lost a lot of blood, and all this fighting didn't help." The leader said while examining her wounds "Sepide, can you take care of her? It will be my time to fight."
Sepide nodded her head as the leader went away. Once they were away from the noise of the crown, Sepide took some bandages to heal her friend. Her eyes widened and she flinched a little when she felt Silva's sudden embrace, but quickly hugged her back.
"I'm sorry... Sepide..."
"Sorry?" Sepide asked, perplexed.
"I didn't know it hurt you too..." Silva pressed Sepide tightly against her "Did it hurt Neige too? I thought I was the only one it affected..."
"Of course you're not the only one affected! When we learned you harmed yourself... Neige and I were both extremely worried for you." Sepide broke free from her friend's arms and took her hand, which was still bloody "Come on, you need to eat something and we'll put up bandages."
"I won't do it again."
"Huh?" Sepide frowned her brows, curious about Silva's words.
"I won't harm myself again... I don't want to hear that despair in your voice ever again."
Sepide smiled softly, with tears in her eyes.
"Thanks, Silva... Is there something you want to eat?"
"I'd like something that tastes like a cloud..."
"I think you're a bit too exhausted for your own good. Come on, you need rest."
Ada and Polyetta both made their way into the ring. The crowd was waiting for one thing, seeing Ada lose. Not only they still felt sour about her win, but they also were overexcited about the way Polyetta used her blade. The leader stared at the nun with a deadly, lingering stare, waiting for the moment when the fight would start.
"I know you're cheating, and I'll still win."
Ada took a shaky stance, dreading the moment the fight would begin. Opal's voice echoed in the Colosseum, finally ending the wait.
"Silva may not be able to participate in the final, so this could very well be the final of our tournament. Ada and Yada will face each other, may the best win!"
The leader walked slowly toward Ada her sword sliding on the snowy floor of the arena. Ada took her spear in her head, preparing herself for an attack at any moment. The pressure rose as the woman approached menacingly. Once she managed to get close enough, her blade swung at what looked like the speed of light. The nun barely managed to dodge the slash and quickly noticed that she had no chance to even do anything. Her spear flew away as she fell to the ground, her cheek cut from the slash.
"It's fine, I saw what I needed to see."
The leader stopped for a moment at the anomaly's words. A tentacle made of black matter came out of the ground and swung at her, sending the woman flying out of the ring. Opal whistled, trying to get Ada's attention.
"It's cheating, you're disqua-"
"Come on, can't you see that I don't care about the tournament anymore?!"
Opal pouted in an offended way, letting an annoyed sigh while looking at the rest of the fight. Ada slowly walked toward Polyetta, with darkness surrounding her.
"I saw enough, so I'll give you a choice."
"A... Choice?" Asked the leader while standing back up painfully.
"I want to create a world, just for Neige. You could say that all of this was just a way to see who would be a good enough person to join our perfect world. I don't really want you around, but you're kinda his friend so if you promise to not cause problems you can stay."
"Stay? In your world?" The leader asked offended.
"I know you think the same as me! Can't you imagine a perfect world? A world where everyone is happy, a world where everyone can be free of their past."
"I'd rather die in hell than trust you. You made all of this just to find people for your world and never intended to keep your promise, right?"
"Kinda, but it's for everyone's good. It's only in dire situations that you see human's true nature."
The leader rushed toward the anomaly while she talked. Ada let out a saddened sigh before sending her flying with another of her tentacles. Silva and Sepide both came to their leader to make sure she was all right. Enraged, Sepide took her gun and aimed at the anomaly with determination in her eyes.
"Stop right there!"
"I just wanted a world where everyone was happy... Why don't you listen? Why do you keep struggling!?"
Ada's human form became more and more abstract, looking more like a distorted shadow than anything else.
"I'm going to make everyone happy! Whether you like it or not! I'll create my perfect world with Neige, even if it will be without you!"