NOVEL WEB Chapter 45. Reason for Hope or a Bad Sign?
Yara was left speechless after hearing Rina's accusations. The first part might have been somewhat justified as she had indeed worked for the person who sent mercenaries to capture the lionkins, though, in her defense, she had negotiated to act only as a bodyguard. But what kind of logic led Rina to conclude that she was a playboy? Given that Yara had never even held hands with anyone before, she felt she had been greatly wronged.
"I don't deny that during my mercenary career, I sometimes worked for bad people and did things I'm not proud of, and I don't intend to make excuses for that. How should I put it... If I have to choose between my well-being and others', I will always choose the first option. But if I hadn't acted that way, the situation I would be in now would probably be very grim. I think you can imagine just by looking at me what would have awaited me if I were a weak person who couldn't protect herself. Anyway, as long as someone doesn't have strong support to rely on, it's almost impossible to reach my level while keeping their hands clean...", Yara explained the situation she was in.
Although she had been made aware of Marquis Olsen's intentions towards the inhabitants of Rina's village, as long as she could still achieve her goal, she did not intend to stop working for him, even though she knew she would have to partake in something immoral. Yara always believed that only those who have no one above them can afford to be influenced by pity; for everyone else, pity is like a contagious disease: today you pity someone, and tomorrow someone will pity you. Yes, for an ordinary person, personal well-being cannot exist without being based on the suffering of others.
Let's take a simple example: going to a store. If the seller miscalculates the total cost of the selected products and asks for less money, the buyer benefits by paying less, but this couldn't happen without the seller incurring a loss.
In conclusion, Yara could sleep soundly no matter what happened to the lionkins because she had become accustomed to the idea that living means devouring others. But that didn't mean she personally had anything against the lionkin. It was just business.
'That was truly a good speech. In my opinion, it would probably score 9 out of 10 on the cool speech scale of an anti-hero...', Lucy thought to herself as she assessed Yara. She was impressed by the fact that Yara didn't try to deceive herself into thinking she was innocent when doing something wrong and that the only ones to blame were those giving the orders, but she deducted a point because she felt that the reason Yara was willing to do less honorable things wasn't deep enough.
Lucy was aware that for the weak, beauty is a curse and that Yara was forced to be strong to feel safe, but it couldn't be said that Yara's situation was one that stirred strong emotions. If this reason were presented in a movie about a ninja's origins, it probably wouldn't impress too many people, and the studio that produced the movie wouldn't recover its investment. In her opinion, a reason like revenge or regret was much more captivating and easier for the audience to understand.
Although Rina had lived her entire life in an isolated place, she had also seen that the world was not a place where someone who considers themselves a hero could live for long, so she was aware that she couldn't expect Yara to make sacrifices for the well-being of the lionkins, especially since she had no obligation to the inhabitants of her village. Moreover, surviving thanks to the pity of others didn't sit well with the character of lionkins, most of whom were proud people.
Considering these things and the fact that Yara had not taken any action against her village so far, Rina couldn't continue to hold a grudge against Yara for being on the enemy side without seeming narrow-minded.
However, for the extreme way Yara had teased her, Rina still felt entitled to ask for an explanation, firmly believing that Yara was not a serious person.
"I understand. Maybe you're not the enemy of my village... But after what you did to me, don’t think I can look at you favorably. Do you really believe that humiliating someone is the best way to get close to them? I don't know what kind of girls you've dealt with before, but I'm not one of them..."
Upon hearing Rina's words, not only Yara but also Lucy choked on the salty crackers they had in their mouths.
As Lucy reflected on how she had reacted to Yara’s teasing, she began to wonder if she was partly to blame for Yara’s mistaken idea of how to court a girl. She didn’t deny that a bit of S&M play in the bedroom could be fun, but it didn’t have much of a place before exchanging even a few words, especially when the other person clearly wasn’t in the mood for it.
"...Rina, I’m sorry if I went too far. But it wasn’t because I’m used to flirting with girls like you said. It’s the opposite, actually—this is all new to me, and I let my instincts take over. Believe me, until today, I didn’t even know I had a preference for girls! Anyway, if it’ll make you feel better, I’ll let you touch me back in the same way...", Yara said after taking a deep breath, hoping her explanation would be enough to dispel Rina’s fantasies that she was some kind of succubus.
"Who...who wants to touch you? Besides, how could I even do the same thing? You don't even have a tail!", Rina quickly retorted, averting her gaze from Yara so as not to be influenced by her expression full of obedience. Even if Yara was telling the truth about her romantic history, it didn't change the fact that Yara was something similar to her natural predator, as she had no way to counterattack her. Thus, she couldn't risk lowering her guard in Yara's presence, even if Yara showed signs of weakness, because there was a good chance that she would still end up being the one bullied.
"Well, the offer doesn't have an expiration date, so you have time to think of an alternative...", Yara said as if she was already sure they would be spending a lot of time together from now on.
Also aware of the implication in Yara's words, Rina thought she needed to be tougher to prevent Yara from dominating her.
"No, there’s no need. I don’t plan on doing such things except with my girlfriend...", Rina reminded Yara that she had not agreed to any relationship between them.
"Huh? I thought we resolved all the misunderstandings... What problem is left?", Yara asked, with a confused expression, though she didn't seem at all disturbed by Rina's cold tone.
Since Rina was straightforward by nature, the fact that she hadn’t outright rejected the idea of a relationship and was willing to continue the conversation made Yara fairly certain that Rina would eventually agree, so she didn’t see much reason to worry.
"What problem is left? Isn't it obvious? Then imagine you're in my place, that you're in a relationship, and out of nowhere, a girl shows up and suggests sharing your girlfriend with her. What would you say in that situation? I don't think you'd be thrilled...", Rina tried to make Yara see things from her perspective. Perhaps Yara was okay with sharing Lucy because she had nothing to lose, but that wasn't the case for her. Rina was extremely worried that Yara's presence would make Lucy's feelings for her less strong than they would be if it were just the two of them in a relationship.
"But who said anything about sharing? Can't we all be happy together? Or is it that you don't want anything to do with me... Is that it? You don't find me attractive at all?", Yara thought to put Rina in a dilemma, feeling pretty sure that the answer wouldn't be a simple no, not only because she knew how good she looked, but also because of how Rina reacted to her teasing.
Hearing Yara's questions, Rina was stunned for a few seconds. She didn't want to admit that she found Yara attractive, as it would give Yara satisfaction, but she also couldn't outright deny it because it would be obvious she was lying. Only someone blind could possibly be immune to her beauty.
Moreover, as she continued the calm conversation with Yara, Rina began to see her less as an overly dominant person with whom it was impossible to reach a compromise. On the contrary, Yara often displayed signs of maturity.
"...I don't see what that has to do with anything...", Rina tried to dodge giving a clear answer.
"Well, I think it's very important because mutual attraction is the first step towards developing a relationship. So, I like you, you like me, Lucy likes both of us, and we both like Lucy, so I don't see any reason why we can't all be in a relationship together...", Yara said, taking Rina's hesitation as clear evidence that she liked her but was too shy to admit it. "Besides, I think you've noticed that together, it's much easier to keep Lucy under control.", Yara continued to persuade Rina. "Alone, neither you nor I have a chance of opposing her, but if we join forces..."
"Ahem!" Lucy suddenly interrupted, displeased with the direction the conversation between Yara and Rina was taking.
'Don’t try to lure Rina to the dark side, Darth Yara!', Lucy began to panic in her mind.
