Chapter 8: Sofa Talk
I exited the bathroom naked, apart from my headband in my left hand and a towel in my right. Naruto seemed to have just finished cleaning up the living room with some clones.
"Sa-Sakura! You're naked!"
I gave him an eye roll and smiled.
"Naruto, do I look stupid enough not to realise I am naked?"
It seemed a bit hypocritical to be comfortable having sex with me but not to be around me when I was naked. But it seemed to be really bothering Naruto, so I quickly summoned up the same outfit from before.
"Better?"
Once I had dried my hair, I put my headband back on.
"How do I look?"
"You... Look good. Can we talk about what h-happened?"
I flopped down on the sofa next to Naruto.
"What is there to talk about?"
Naruto opened his mouth to say something but seemed to be unable to find any words.
"Sigh... What's wrong?"
"...I just feel like this is something we need to talk about... I thought you loved Sasuke... And you never seemed to return the feelings I have for you."
"Naruto... I do care for you... but I'm not in love with you. And I care for Sasuke. But I don't love him anymore, and I'm not sure I ever did."
"But why did--!"
"Because I wanted to. And because you wanted to. It's that simple. I don't regret what we did, but if you do, then that's your problem."
"I don't! It's just that I wasn't expecting it to happen. And now I'm wondering why it did."
"I just told you why, because we both wanted to! And if you ask why we wanted to, the answer is because it felt good! It's not that complex..."
"...What do we do now?"
"We go beat Kakashi-sensei! You bragged about being stronger than three years ago, so now you got to prove it! And I have to too!"
"I meant abou--"
"Fine! I'll spell it out! We go on as we used to, but now you know that we can fuck pretty much whenever you want... And I wasn't going to bring this up, but I took it in my ass in case you wanted to save your 'virginity' for someone else. I gave you your first female kiss, blowjob and anal sex. So I don't consider you a virgin, but I know some people don't count it unless it was dick in pussy."
Even though it was important to me that I stayed true to myself and didn't let anyone tell me who I could and couldn't fuck I figured that I could leave Naruto's vaginal virginity for Hinata. I also wasn't an idiot. I knew Naruto always liked me and was jealous of Sasuke. But that wasn't just a 'pity fuck'. I did feel bad for him when he got upset about kissing his own shadow clone, but I really wanted to have sex with him anyway, and after seeing him get upset, I couldn't wait any longer.
"...It's just that I always liked you, but years ago, I decided to give up on you because you liked Sasuke. I was resolved, but then when I saw you today... the way you spoke, acted and looked... All I could think about was sex... but now that we've done it, I can think clearly again... And for the first time in years, I want more, especially now that I know you don't love Sasuke."
I scooted up beside him on the sofa and gently ran my fingers through his hair while I spoke softly.
"Naruto, honey... That's just 'post-nut-clarity.' You've dumped all your hormones. So you're not thinking of sex, and your head is filling with all these thoughts. But when you get horny again, you'll be happy with this relationship. Friends with benefits. I'm not going to say that you don't want me as your girlfriend, as I'm not you, but I will tell you that it would be a horrible idea."
I gave a nervous smile and averted my gaze from his eyes before mumbling.
"Not only would I fuck other people... I sort of have developed a cheating fetish... Everyone in the village knows my reputation, so that means they won't fall for it, but you didn't know it yet and honestly, if I didn't like you so much, I would have probably let you date me... so I could fuck other people behind your back..."
I also really liked Hinata. If I didn't, I would have actively fucked the people she liked and rubbed it in her face. If Ino told me she liked someone, I would definitely do it to her. I had always known that I could be sadistic, deep down. But until I told Naruto that, I had never admitted it to myself. It seemed there was still part of me that I felt ashamed of.
"T-That's..."
"Really fucked up...? I know."
I still believed it was other people's fault if they cheated on their partners with me. However, it would only be my fault if I cheated on my partner with someone else... But it would also be extremely hot.
I turned back around to him and looked him in the eyes.
"Naruto... I really do like you. And I want to continue having sex with you... but it can never be more than that... Because the only thing that would make me want a relationship with someone is the chance to hurt that person for my own sexual gratification... And I know that even if I hated myself for doing it, the sweeter my partner, the more I'd get off on hurting them. I wouldn't be able to help myself. And it's REALLY taking me a lot not to do that right now."
"...I understand... let's go and meet Kakashi-sensei..."
Naruto stood up from the sofa and walked towards the door. I would fuck Naruto a lot more in the years that followed, but he never looked at me the same way he did before that day. And I was glad about it.