Rising Shards

Alright. This could go either way. This could go cool and I’m freaking out for nothing. It could also go very badly. Zeta could hate me after this, or even just be mad at my general presence. She’s had a small family most of her life, I assume. Would she think I’m just stomping on that?

As I stood in the kitchen just having an internal meltdown, Zeta was shaking like a scared kitten. It made me want to cry for putting her through this. I needed to get over myself and be the adult in the room.

"Before you say this," Zeta said. Her fists were balled up and her tail began to shake. "I just want to say, I don't really like this whole secret thing. I know Stella's big on secrets so I'm used to it, but it's not a good used to it, it's a bad used to it, so having one more thing she's keeping from me sucks, especially now if you're part of it too."

I’d never seen Zeta this mad before. It hurt knowing it was my fault.

"I'm really sorry," I said. "I didn't want to hurt you in any way, obviously."

"I know, it's probably some dumb thing she told you to keep from me. But still..." Zeta said.

“Alright, fine. I’ll rip the bandage off.” I said.

“It’s a rare Cani disease, I knew it! It’s in the tail, right?” Zeta said.

“No, buddy. I’m just gonna say it.” I said. The words still wouldn’t come out. I just pictured Stella’s disappointment at me. “It’s really hard to say, sorry.” Diast said.

“Just…say it.” Zeta said. She set the charmed marble on the table. Basically, it would tell when whatever I was hiding was revealed and would stop shining.

“Your sister might not want—” I said.

“I can deal with Stella! Just tell me, please, I can’t take it…” Zeta said.

“Right. OK.” I sat down.

Zeta shut her eyes for a second like whatever I was gonna say would feel like a physical attack.

“Your sister and I are…” I said.

“Huh?” Zeta said.

“Well, is dating the right word?” I said. "I guess I'm just not sure if it's like imminently official?"

Zeta responded by saying “Huh?” and “Wait.” A bunch, which was an understandable reaction.

 “We’re not like a thing. Yet.” I said.

“Wait.” Zeta said.

Now that it was kind of out there, my chatty side took over. “But we’re probably gonna be a thing,” I said. “And we’re pretty much a thing. Because I feel a lot of things about her that I’d only feel if it was a thing. That I hope she is also feeling! And I know I can’t hide that from you if you’re living here, and it’s not fair to hide it from you.”

“…wait.” Zeta said.

“And I know it’s super weird for you, and it’s probably gonna be really super weird for a freaking long time, and probably for me too,” I said. “But part of being with Stella means taking care of you, and I want you to know that I—I want to do that! I don’t want to let her down, and I don’t want to let you down either.”

“So that’s…” Zeta said after the marble’s glow faded. “...wow.”

She wasn’t shaking anymore, which was good. I felt relieved about finally saying it, too.

“Are you…good? Stel talked about us throwing a lot at you and I know this just adds to it, but—”

“Today makes a lot more sense now.” Zeta said. “A lot makes a lot more sense now.”

"Again, I'm really sorry I hurt you,” I said. “I know Stella's said she doesn't tell you a lot, and I really hate that whatever's going on with your family hurt her to the point that she keeps it so locked up, but...we really should've just told you about us right away. I'm sorry."

"Thank you," Zeta said. She didn’t sound fully on a “Wow yay!” train about this yet.

"If you gotta just vent that out to me, I can take it." I said. "I've had students yell plenty at me. Teachers too, ugh. I maybe bring this on myself sometimes. But not the random people on the street, I will not take responsibility for when they yell at me."

"I don't know, I'm not really mad at you, I'm just...thinking this all out." Zeta said.

"Take your time." I said. "Do you need a pop or anything?" Grabbing a nice drink was my go to for helping students, a method I even used when helping Zeta out when I found her crying on campus one day.

"Um, maybe," Zeta said. 

Zeta sipped a Diet Mountaintop Bliss as she mulled everything over.

“You do talk in that couple-y way.” Zeta said, breaking a long silence. “Like, from the moment you met.”

"You think?" I asked.

Zeta nodded. “When did this happen?”

“Gradually over the last few months,” I said. “Then the whole living situation fell together and...so did we.”

“You have to be nice to her, alright?” Zeta said. “She’s been through a lot. And she pushes herself really hard.”

“I’m trying, I wanna do right by her.” I said.

“Aw.” Zeta said. “So will you get in trouble if they find out about you guys at school?”

“I won’t, but Stella will probably get some judgment about it since she’s new. So…if you could…”

“I’ll keep it secret, don’t worry.” Zeta said.

“How are you feeling?” I asked.

“It’s…a lot. But not a bad a lot?” Zeta said. “I think Stella needs someone like you.”

“Yeah…” I said, feeling tears well up in my eyes immediately.

“How are you feeling?” Zeta asked.

“Today’s been a lot,” I said. “Potentially being your actual canon parent is a lot scarier than I thought.”

“I think you’ll do great,” Zeta said. “You were already kinda were doing that, let’s be real. Look how quickly those Shafey’s people bought it! You’re already a great guardian.”

“Thanks, Zeta,” I said. “You’re a great canon daughter.”

I grabbed the hidmarble, hating that Marne kind of helped us out inadvertently. “I can’t believe Marne gave you one of these, though. Can I chuck this?”

“Sure,” Zeta said. “Is it a one use dealie? It might come in handy if we need to catch someone else hiding stuff.”

“One use dealie, yeah,” I said. “I also don’t want anything Marne touched in my home.”

Zeta was chuckling to herself when I got back from the garbage outside.

“What’s so funny?” I asked.

“We should trick Stella when she gets back!” Zeta said.

“What do you mean?” I said.

“Maybe like tell her I found out about you guys,” Zeta said. “Then say I ran away because I got upset or something.”

“That might…make her pretty devastated, bud.” I said, stifling a laugh at how quickly she turned to deviousness.

“Right! It’d be so funny.” Zeta said.

“We could also surprise her with some Ultra Taco?” I suggested. “That might be a bit less traumatic for her.”

“That works too.”

* * *

Zeta was uncontrollably laughing after we made one more trip to get Ultra Taco.

“How long does an orientation normally take?” Zeta asked.

“It depends, really,” I said. “She’s faculty so it might not be as long. I’m guessing she’ll be home any minute.” I didn’t have any texts from her. “She hasn’t written in a bit, but she’s offline so she’s maybe driving over here…”

Zeta beamed smugly at me.

“What? Shut up.” I said.

“I just think it’s nice you two text each other!” Zeta said.

“I am super relieved you’re taking this so well, at least.” I said, a bit stunned at how much I was blushing about this. “Don’t go run off when she gets here, alright? We need to rip the bandage off for her, too.”

“Alright, but hypothetically,” Zeta said, laughing deeply in a way that sounded close to Stella’s goofy gut laugh.

“Uh huh…?” I said.

“Wouldn’t it be kinda super funny if I just hid in the bathroom or something then ran out to hug her?”

“Zeta, she’s gonna be beat,” I said. “Do you really think she’s going to want to come back from this long orientation only to get scared about you right away?”

“It’ll be funny though!” Zeta said. “I’m her sister, I know her better than anyone probably! I can take the Ultra Taco too so I can give her that to really ease her back down. Also, she kind of deserves this for all the stuff she keeps from me. And then I'll completely forgive you for getting roped into her secret keeping!”

I knew I probably shouldn’t, but the idea was really really funny. “…fine, you win. I do wanna see the look on her face.”