Rise of the Strongest Exorcist (DxD parody)

When Leo entered the open area behind the house, it was to see Lucy's perfect, heart-shaped rear in tight yoga pants bent over as she marked sigils into the ground with a metal rod. He recognized what she was doing, and knew better than to startle or disturb her. Interrupting the inscription of wards could have disastrous results. He waited until she was done to speak.

When Lucy stopped and then straightened with a languid stretch, Leo had to swallow hard before opening his mouth. He had to admit, without seeing her stoic expression or hearing her near-monotone, calm voice… Lucy looked damned good!

"Why are you marking silence and barrier runes around the backyard?" he asked. 

"Ah… Master Leo…" his succubus maid answered. "When you said you wanted to train, I thought I might be able to assist you."

Leo snorted, narrowing his eyes. "I'm not going to do partner assisted yoga with you," he growled. "I can imagine how that will go if you ask me to help you with downward dog…"

"Fufufu!" 

For once, Lucy's expression lit up as she licked her lips. As quick as it happened, her face settled back into its normal, stoic expression. Leo almost wondered if he'd been imagining it.

"As much fun as that would be…" Her calm, flat tone pricked a hole in the burgeoning desire Leo had felt upon seeing the desire in Lucy's eyes. "My skills with a sword are below your own."

"I wasn't going to go through any sword forms until the end," Leo admitted.

"Oh?" Lucy blinked slowly at him. "Then what were you going to do?"

Leo shrugged noncommittally. "I was just going to do some stretches and some exercises to get back in shape." He rubbed the back of his neck. "I… ah… I kind of slacked off in Colorado."

"Too much of that Rocky Mountain high?" Lucy asked. It almost looked like her eyebrow wanted to arch, but then gave up after a brief struggle as not being worth the effort.

"No!" Leo scowled as he leaned over one leg in a hurdler's stretch. "I didn't get into any of that crap."

"You are simply going to do some stretches and then… what, some pushups and crunches?" the succubus maid pressed.

"Pretty much," Leo replied, shifting to his other leg.

Lucy calmly watched him. He would say she was as still as a statue, except for the spade-shaped tail that languidly curled from side to side behind her. Suddenly, she nodded to herself and mirrored Leo as he went through his stretching routine.

Feeling the ache of stretched tendons, Leo stood and swung his arms around to warm them up. As he got down onto his hands and knees before doing his first set of pushups, he said, "I don't know that you'll be able to do anything to help me with this."

"Oh?" 

For some reason, Lucy put a ton of emotion into the one word interrogative.

Shaking his head, Leo started doing pushups. He knocked them out at a slow, steady pace. When doing body-weight exercises, he knew form was more important than the final count of how many he did. He lowered himself until his nose nearly touched the ground on a four-count. Pausing briefly when he broke the plane such that his shoulder blades were lower than his elbows, Leo pushed back up to almost lock out his arms on a similar four count. 

Lucy watched in silence for the first twenty pushups.

"If you can do another twenty pushups like that, Master…" 

Leo looked up to see a rare smirk on his maid's face.

"If you manage that, I will stop greeting you each afternoon in my lingerie."

"You're on!" Leo grunted as he continued into his second set of twenty.

He'd lowered himself for the second time in this set when his arms gave out. It felt like an elephant had plopped its fat ass onto his back! 

"What the…!" Leo grunted, straining to relieve the pressure on his chest.

"I suppose ten times normal gravity is a bit much to start with," Lucy mused. 

The pressure weighing him down let off—though only a little. Instead of an elephant, the weight pushing him into the ground had lightened to that of a horse.

Leo groaned as with shaking arms, he pushed up from the ground.

"Still too much?" Lucy asked. 

Barely pausing at the top, Leo fought against the extra gravity pressing on him with his own magic as he lowered himself back down for his third rep. 

"Perfect, Master Leo. Fight my magic. Push it back as you push yourself up."

Leo managed another five pushups before Lucy changed things up again. His next push against the ground sent him shooting a dozen feet into the air. He had to reverse his magic, increasing the effect of gravity to bring it back into rough equilibrium. 

He'd just managed to bring himself almost back down to the earth when Lucy flipped the script on him again. His flailing body created a puff of dirt and grass when it slammed back into the earth.

"Ughhh…" Leo groaned, rolling over onto his back.

"Whatever is the problem, Master Leo?"

He swore he could hear the smirk in his maid's calm tone, but when he looked over, her expression was as flat as ever.

"That is only ten pushups, Master Leo. You have ten more to go, if you find viewing my body so abhorrent."

Cursing to himself, Leo paused on his hands and knees before resuming the start position for his next ten pushups. His right arm turned to scales up to his elbow and a blue glowing barrier materialized a foot beyond his body as he lifted into the start position and lowered himself on a four count before pushing back up on a four count.

Leo watched as he continued lowering and raising himself as Lucy sauntered over to the barrier. When she reached a delicate finger out to touch it, electricity arced from the barrier to her finger with a loud ZAP!

"Hmmm…" Lucy murmured as she studied the scorch mark on the tip of her finger. "I see… so that's how it's going to be…"

As Leo completed pushup number seventeen, his barrier suddenly pressed in around him. From a good foot beyond his body, the blue barrier shrank to barely an inch. His arms nearly gave out as his weight tripled under the multiplied gravity. His arms shook as he finished that rep.

"Only two more to go, Master Leo," he heard Lucy calmly say. "But will I really have to showing off my lingerie collection?" She paused, and he heard her foot tapping the ground. "Maybe… but you will have to work for it."

His blue barrier suddenly pressed against his skin, threatening to compress him into paste. Leo gasped and the scales on his arm flared up his shoulder and down the other arm. The crushing stopped as scales flared under his shirt to cover his entire torso. His fingernails grew as they stabbed into the ground.

Pushing everything he had into his magic against Lucy's control of the area immediately around him, Leo lowered himself to the ground and pushed against it. Halfway up, he sensed when Lucy's magic switched and he flipped his own magic to counter hers. Then net effect was that his body only lifted off the ground by an inch.

When Lucy switched things up again, Leo's tendons creaked at the force with which his palms and toes met the ground. He felt both big toes snap as they broke. He gasped. 

"Just admit that I look sexy in my lingerie, Master, and I'll stop," Lucy purred.

Having put his all into it, he wasn't about to give up. With everything he had, Leo locked gravity in place and pushed up from the ground one last time. "You…" Gasp. "Look…" Grunt. "Good…" Groan… "But…"

A sliver of a scowl threatened to turn one corner of her lips down at the 'But'.

"You… Ah…" Gasp. "Need…" Groan. "Emotion…" Grunt. "To… Ah… Play" Groan. "With…" 

With a final shout of "Emotion!" Leo locked his arms out before collapsing to the ground.