Re:Zero kara Hajimeru Isekai Seikatsu web novel

Chapter 619: Ayamatsu IF (Pride IF):Part 2



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He thrust the sword into his thin body, and twisted it.

The feedback from the tip of the sword informed him that he had just severed something vital.

And with a thin rattle of breath――

Subaru: "I don't think you'll believe me when I tell you this, but…"

Petelgeuse: "W-why…?"

Subaru: "I thought you were one of the best among a group of hateful people, Petel-san."

He widened his eyes in shock and looked desperately at Subaru.

Surprise remained within him as he slowly toppled backward, Subaru pulling the sword from his chest. The momentum made Subaru stumble backward. He took a deep breath.

At Subaru's feet, Petelgeuse Romanée-Conti lay in a pool of blood. Petelgeuse, dying, its heart destroyed by Subaru's fault.

Subaru: "It was a real effort to set up this whole situation. Considering how crazy you're being, you're really too meticulous. Seriously, I've gotten stuck so many times."

Petelgeuse: "What… are… you… saying?"

Subaru: "I'm talking about all the trial and error it took to get here. That goes for planning my strategy too, but getting my trump card and all that was really risky. You have no idea how relieved I am."

Petelgeuse crawled, forcing his helpless limbs to regain their strength. But he lacked the strength to get up, only to crawl backward, as if fleeing death.

Subaru had nothing to do. Petelgeuse didn't have much longer to live.

Subaru: "I couldn't see the Invisible Hands at first, I was panicking about what was going on. Dealing with your knuckles was a lot of trouble too… now I really feel like I've accomplished something."

Petelgeuse: "Ghh, auhhhh…"

The blood flowing from Petelgeuse was the last trace of its life.

He showed no signs of stopping and was intensifying. Subaru watched him bleed out as he revealed everything, like a higher spirit.

The Invisible Hands are black and unobservable.

Petelgeuse's confidants and his reserve corps, the Phalanges.

And the ability to migrate to these bodies, his Possession which prolonged life.

Making full use of all three, Petelgeuse had been the very image of his beloved "stagecoach" as he attempted to corner Emilia. Taking him down had truly been an exhausting effort.

In fact, it took Subaru over 400 trials and errors to get to this point.

Subaru: "Which makes you the person I've talked to the most in the world. I know it's a bit of an exaggeration, but I feel like you're like a friend. Observing how you go out of your way to achieve your goals, playing every card you have, I have to say I was touched."

Petelgeuse: "What are you saying… what are you saying what are you saying that you say ...

At the very last moment, a livid force entered his dying body. Concentrating all of this force absolutely on himself, Petelgeuse straightened his dying form.

He coughed up blood――literally, it was dripping from his mouth, his bloodshot eyes opening as he turned towards Subaru.

Petelgeuse: "Traitor! Traitor who rejects the Witch's love! You cannot, you cannot be FORGIVEN!!"

Petelgeuse held out his blood-soaked hand.

He wasn't doing it to activate the Invisible Hands. An invisible arm was useless when it was perceptible. What Petelgeuse was clinging to was――

――The conditions for the evil spirit, Petelgeuse Romanée-Conti, to take over the body of another. The process that allowed it to possess the bodies of those with spiritualist abilities. There was only one person here who met those conditions――

Petelgeuse: "Your body is――!!"

Mine! That was Petelgeuse's intention, but Subaru just sighed.

He walked calmly over to Petelgeuse and kicked him in the face. The force of the blow knocked out some of Petelgeuse's teeth, knocking him back and knocking him back.

He hadn't been able to transfer himself into this supposedly ideal body.

Subaru's response was not manifested in words, but in his raised left hand, where a faint red light hovered over its fingers.

It was an entity called a minor spirit.

This entity had made a contract with Natsuki Subaru, who had the disposition of a spiritualist, a fine tool for illuminating dark paths.

The evil spirit Petelgeuse could only possess the bodies of Spiritmasters who didn't have a Contract. Who could guess how many deaths it took Subaru before he realized this?

Subaru: "These three days have been the longest of my life. Although from your perspective, we haven't known each other for very long…"

Petelgeuse: "NATSUKI SUBARUUUUUUU!"

Subaru: "You targeted Emilia. ――Regret it."

Petelgeuse let out a scream of hatred, before receiving a kick from Subaru in the chest and a sword strike to the face. The blade plunged into Petelgeuse's skull, destroying his brain and his life.

The grim wailing stopped. Subaru leaned on the sword planted in Petelgeuse, sighing.

In reality, the battle against Petelgeuse had been very short, but in Subaru's perception, it had been incredibly long. Feelings of both accomplishment and discouragement washed over him.

???: "Hmmhmm? Looks like you're already done too."

After a period of silence, a voice spoke to Subaru.

He turned around to find a massive figure slinking through the shrubs and bushes—a black-skinned beast with a lion's head and four ghastly limbs—approaching him.

Naturally, the one addressing him wasn't the beast. It was the girl riding on its back, casting a charming glance at Subaru.

Subaru: "Yes, I'm done. Thank you, Meili."

Meili: "No worries. You pay us, and you took care of Elsa. But are you sure about that? I thought they were your friends."

Subaru: "I wonder. If he hadn't tried to kill me in the end, then maybe you could have called us friends with an age difference, but he tried to kill me so… unfortunately disqualified as a friend, I guess?"

Using his sleeve to wipe away the blood that had splashed on him, Subaru shrugged as he looked at the girl, Meili. She placed her fingers on her chin.

Meili: "Hrmmm. I'm not trying to kill you, so that means we're friends?"

Subaru: "Logically, that's the case. You and I are friends, Meili."

Meili: "Ahh, yay! Now, if you count Petra-chan and the others too, I have a lot of friends!"

Clasping her hands together, Meili swung her shoulders playfully as she sat atop the beast. Her childish attitude made Subaru raise an eyebrow, and her statement about having friends surprised him.

Subaru: "Huh, I'm surprised. That's a hell of a thing to say, but you really do have friends."

Meili: "I have some. But I killed them all."

Subaru: "――――"

Meili said this, smiling slightly, and without appearing guilty in the least.

She had killed them. So they were probably people she was involved with in her work. He thought Meili had childish aspects to her, but yes, her morals were twisted. Well, she was Elsa's sister, so what did he expect?

Subaru: "Either way, you've provided invaluable assistance where I couldn't. If it weren't for you, I never would have managed to kill all the Phalanxes on my own."

Meili: "Don't worry about it. But did you really have to go out of your way to hire us? You could have asked someone more suitable, like the Knights."

Subaru: "I wouldn't be able to achieve part of my goal if I did that."

Meili: "Objective?"

Meili tilted her head, trying to probe Subaru's thoughts. But he offered no further explanation, just a crafty smile and,

Subaru: "The rest of this conversation is for adults. Kids like you don't need to hear about it, Meili."

Meili: "Ahh! Damn it, you treat me like a child! I don't care about you anymore, onii-san, it's over, I don't care about anything anymore!"

Meili replied angrily, and the beast growled as if spurred on by her anger.

She sent her pet after him. After all the effort he'd had to put into killing Petelgeuse, he'd really prefer if this attempt didn't end in failure.

Trying to improve Meili's mood, Subaru went about his business like a bootlicker.

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A few days after the start of the Royal Selection, a rather significant change had occurred in the territories of Lugnica.

The biggest change had been the withdrawal of Duchess Crusch Karsten, the most popular candidate in the race for the title of sovereign, although Subaru was the only one who understood the whole truth about this situation.

Because all traces of this so-called "Crusch" had been erased from the world, eliminated along with her existence, reclassified by the world as never having existed at all.

Which meant that the Royal Selection had now always consisted of four people, that the memories of Duchess Karsten's supporters had been distorted, and that they had become allies of other camps.

Subaru: "Damn, the White Whale fog is terrifying. It erases people's existence."

It was a mystery why it was ineffective on Subaru. But, given that Subaru didn't feel any particular sensations, it was just a pain to see bizarre inconsistencies pop up in his conversations with people.

He wishes he could forget that stupid Crusch Karsten.

Someone who died because they fought an enemy they could not hope to rival would never have the opportunity to come back.

The only person in the world who could have this opportunity was Natsuki Subaru.

And so the vanquished did nothing but serve as reminders: don't do the stupid things they did.

But another change, unimportant to everyone except Subaru, had also occurred. It was――

???: "Royal Selection candidate, Emilia. Who has subjugated the eternal tormentor of the world, the Archbishop of Sin, Sloth, and Witch Cult!"

The Kingdom was in turmoil over this news, and apparently even foreign nations were aware of this feat.

Even Subaru was surprised at the effectiveness of this propaganda. A victory snatched from 400 years of death, claimed by Natsuki Subaru—which he had entirely transferred to the shady clown-man who supported Emilia.

The question of how the Margrave would react to the negotiations to grant the achievements to Emilia had honestly been a gamble worthy of Petelgeuse's subjugation, but――

Subaru: "He was so cool about it it was disgusting."

Margrave Roswaal L. Mathers had received Subaru's proposal, readily agreed, and immediately announced that the subjugation of Petelgeuse was Emilia's achievement.

Although sensing something fishy about him, Subaru had no qualms about Roswaal's actions.

This world denigrated Emilia for stupid and absurd reasons. And yet Roswaal had presented himself as her supporter, become her protector, and encouraged her participation in the Selection.

Perhaps it was simply a whim, or more likely he was hoping to take advantage of the one-in-a-million chance that Emilia would ascend to the throne.

The way he'd rushed off spitting everywhere in response to Subaru's report on Petelgeuse was proof of that.

Subaru: "No problem. Do as you wish, Mr. Margrave. As long as you side with Emilia, I'll throw myself at your side as well. As you expect, the Sovereign will be Emilia."

Subaru would do whatever he could with his death-defying power to achieve this.

But if it should happen that Roswaal had any unseemly desires or thoughts toward Emilia, then――

Subaru: "All it would entail is another tombstone erected for Emilia's sake."

If he were to continue operating in the shadows, without Emilia's knowledge, he would have no choice but to entrust public activities to Roswaal.

In exchange, Subaru would carry out all possible plans in secret. And to this end――

Subaru: "I went out of my way to save you. I'm going to need your help, Blue."

Blue : "----"

At the bottom of the cave was a prison with metal bars.

Chained inside this cold space was a person wearing dirty clothes. Cat ears protruded from the head of this feminine young man, apparently in a knight's uniform.

While Subaru was running around putting things right after Petelgeuse's death and the White Whale's rampage, he found this loot and brought the tool home.

But until now, Subaru had had very little opportunity to appreciate the legendary Blue's healing talents. He didn't even treat his own wounds, content to stare at the prison floor and cry incessantly.

Blue: "…Someone, tell me. Tell me. Why am I… where is His Highness? What was my reason for being? There was someone. There had to be someone. Everything would be strange if there weren't someone. But…"

Subaru: "Wow, I'm stuck. This one's going to take a while."

Subaru scratched his head as he removed a note from his breast pocket. It was the circular announcing the start of the Royal Selection, which Subaru always kept with him zealously.

The document no longer resembled anything Subaru knew. There were supposed to be five candidates—but now there were four, and the descriptions had shrunk.

The change due to the abolition of Crusch Karsten's existence had affected the statement.

But Subaru remembered. Even though he had completely ignored it, he had reread it countless times. The Knight of Crusch Karsten was named Felix Argyle.

Which must have been the case with this healer here, Blue.

Subaru: "I thought that when someone was erased by the Whale's fog, their memories compensated by changing in ways that didn't seem weird, but… look at this."

Blue: "Can someone, can someone tell me… His Highness, His Highness? His Highness, and, anyone else…?"

Subaru: "When they're so huge that you can't make up for the missing memories, I guess that's what happens."

When the missing person was such a big part of someone's character, it was obvious that they would fall apart when that person disappeared from the world.

That's why Blue ended up moping around and around like a broken doll.

Unfortunately, even Subaru didn't know how to fix Blue's broken spirit.

Subaru had never had any contact with the person who had preserved Blue's heart. And even assuming he did go back in time, he wasn't sure where he would return.

And so Subaru didn't know what story had been woven between them.

Subaru: "But still, I found a nice pawn here. It's okay. I'll fill the gaps in your heart, that's for sure."

Blue: "Someone, please… tell me. I, why I am…"

Blue showed absolutely no reaction to Subaru.

It might have seemed hopeless, but Subaru proceeded without worry. He was willing to take his time.

A Healing Knight deprived of his support. We didn't often have pawns as easily manipulated as that. And so, Subaru, seriously, with all my heart,

Subaru: "This time, I will definitely find a way to stop you from committing suicide."

I am willing to die an unlimited number of times to challenge you , he affirmed.

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All entrances to the mansion were barricaded.

The doors were nailed shut from the inside, and wooden boards covered all the windows. If he had been observant enough to find the state of this mansion with its closed curtains strange, perhaps he would have noticed.

But naturally, Subaru had organized these operations with the certainty that he would not notice it.

A raging blaze engulfed the entire manor, gradually reducing it to ashes.

The flame that had started this fire knew no respite, blazing ever more furiously as it consumed the entire manor, screaming frantic demands for everything to return to dust.

The furniture and ornaments of the burning mansion weren't the only things charred. The many women who had long ago agonized within the mansion were also losing their lives in the embrace of the flames and smoke, their forms disintegrating into soot, indistinguishable as if they had never been individuals.

A gruesome act. Anyone would think so of this barbarity.

But that was actually what the burning women wanted! That was what could be claimed, but who would believe it?

???: "Fucking, fucking, fucking nonsense!!"

The tongues of flame grew in intensity, driven by the wind. A man's voice swearing echoed through the blazing mansion.

His voice was so strained it was pathetic as he screamed inside the burning, collapsing building.

He was screaming in a complete frenzy, the situation beyond his comprehension, unaware of what had happened.

???: "Number 99! Number 114! Even number 123 would do! Where are you?! Where did you run off to?! Who do you think I am?! Leaving me in the lurch while you expire, what kind of irresponsible, selfish women are you?!"

The white-haired young man's voice cracked as he screamed like a child throwing a tantrum. White clothes clothed his form, his face plain and sinister, like a demon's as he raved.

It was a very strange sight in that disastrous burning mansion.

A sane person would do anything to escape the fire.

But the man showed no signs of wanting to do so. In fact, it was as if he hadn't considered for a single moment that he was going to die, operating according to a kind of dogma that transcended mortality.

He was crazy, or not.

――No, it was incorrect to deny that he was crazy, but in truth, he was deeply confident.

This fire couldn't kill him, he believed.

And so, the man's screams and curses had absolutely nothing to do with fear for his own life. They were due to the inestimable rage he felt towards his wives, who had probably committed the arson.

???: "All these damned people who take my limited possessions and denigrate them――"

???: "――I would appreciate it if you would shut your nasty mouth."

??? : "Nuh――"

The frantic man's face caught a kick that slammed through a flaming wall. Stunned by the unexpected angle of the strike, and even more so by the unforeseen attack, the man flew easily down the corridor. Even the burning wall crumbled, unable to withstand the collision with the crumbling wall.

He tumbled to a stop, sprawled on the floor, and stared at the burning ceiling, stunned.

??? : "What is…"

???: "This fire is the farewell letter from your many wives. In short, it seems to be the end of those obstacles to love born of terror."

The voice that answered the astonished man was the same one he had heard when he received the kick.

The man jerked upright, crawled through the broken wall――to see a woman dressed in black enter the burning room.

Her smile was radiant, and her long black braid was distinctive.

But what revealed her identity most was her kukri, which she held in her right hand――

???: "Thief! Who do you think I am?! Your madness is what you're going to…"

Regret , the man mumbled, raising his arms in an attempt to attack the woman.

But a slight impact and the sight of his arms, severed at the elbows and flying through the air, brought him to a standstill. He looked down. He saw that his arms were missing.

This is impossible. What exactly is going on?

Elsa: "Immortal? Invincible? I forgot what it was, but I know the secret to how it works. Now all you are is a very unpleasant insect."

??? : "――! A prostitute like you――"

Elsa: "――――"

Forgetting his missing arms, the man tried to insult the woman. But she wouldn't let him say a word.

She lifted her leg, sliding it between his thighs as he sat on the ground, and kicked him in the groin. The blow was hard enough to send him flying as the woman brandished her deadly blade.

She then cut off his arms at the shoulders and sliced round pieces of meat from his legs, from his feet to his thighs. His toes, ankles, shins, knees, and thighs were all subject to gashes, blood flowing profusely as the man's body rapidly transformed into something atrocious.

??? : "--My…"

Elsa: "It's amazing you're still trying to talk in this state."

The woman plunged her foot into the man's torso, who was now much smaller, and threw him through the supposedly boarded-up window and out of the burning mansion.

He fell to the ground, unable to catch himself with his missing limbs, next to broken glass. Fortunately, he had only fallen from the second floor, allowing him to escape fatal injuries from the fall.

However, the loss of limbs and blood loss were already largely fatal.

???: "As if I could bear this abject idiocy. …I, I am the most perfect being in the world. Desiring little, knowing I am enough, humble and without greed, this is how I live my life… and so, why do I, of all people, have to face the ruckus of your human failures…"

???: "When you insult people like that regularly, of course you're going to get divorce papers, Regulus-san."

???: "Hauh?!"

Even turning onto his side was a difficult task for this man, when the presence of someone new blocked his view.

A boy with dark hair and eyes, wearing a dark robe――Natsuki Subaru.

It was pitiful how much the man hadn't understood the situation. Subaru sighed.

Subaru: "I never thought everyone would work together so well to make this happen, Regulus-san."

Regulus: "Why are you here… no, then, you designed this?"

Subaru: "Who else could have done it?"

The man, Regulus, finally understood what was happening, and Subaru shrugged, his mouth twisting into a sneer. Unsettled, Regulus's eyes filled with fury.

Regulus: "Curse you, you piece of filth! Do you understand what you've done?! You took my women, my beloved women! And in my presence, you burned them along with my manor! Do you understand the immorality and wickedness of your actions? You filthy wife-murderer!"

Subaru: "This view is so unexpected that I'm too stunned to speak. …By the way, your wives offered their own lives for the anti-heart strategy."

Regulus: "――Im… possible."

Subaru picked his ear, looking astonished as he informed Regulus of this. Regulus was speechless. It was the fact that Regulus found this completely unexpected that Subaru found incomprehensible.

Regulus kept many women, so-called "wives," in his mansion, boasting of the grandeur of a married life and threatening to violently murder them if they ever disobeyed him.

If that were all it was, it would seem like a horribly malevolent harem, but the Archbishop's repugnance didn't end there. The villain had entrusted his own heart to his wives, rendering his own body frozen in time, immortal, and invincible.

The only way to kill Archbishop of Avarice Regulus Corneas was to return his heart.

This meant he had to kill all his targets to shelter his heart, his women, and take away any place for him to hide.

Even Subaru had agonized over this decision.

But it was Regulus's imprisoned wives――no――the imprisoned women who had solved the problem for him.

Subaru: "They were happy to die as long as it allowed them to get revenge on you. Even I've never heard of verbal abuse severe enough to drive people to do that."

Regulus: "Who would believe that? It's absurd... I, I loved my wives! And so they should love me back! Yes?! Don't you find it strange, otherwise?! And yet! Why did those damned women inflict such suffering on me that would upset them as wives!"

Subaru: "…You're serious. That's what's terrifying about you guys."

Subaru muttered this, looking irritated as he looked away from Regulus.

What her gaze landed on instead was the black figure leaping from the burning mansion and landing in the garden. Elsa. She wiped away the soot before noticing Subaru's gaze.

Elsa: "My God, were you worried about me? Don't worry. I wasn't hurt anywhere."

Subaru: "I'm not worried about you. Anyway, what's this nonsense? I didn't tell you to do that tasteless shit to him."

Subaru's lips twisted into a frown as he pointed at the limbless Regulus.

Regulus had limbs the last time Subaru saw him, so it must have been Elsa who did this. She shrugged.

Elsa: "I felt like he'd be rude if he had them… And wouldn't you like to pass on what they said?"

Subaru: "…Yeah. You're right."

Surprisingly, it seemed like Elsa could be caring towards people.

It was wrong to let Regulus die without telling him how the sacrificed women had decided to trap him.

And now that they had communicated this,

Regulus: "GghaaaaAH!"

Elsa stabbed her kukri into Regulus's chest, using it to slowly lift his light body. It was as if he were some kind of food on a stick, blood seeping from him as he tirelessly lusted for life.

Elsa: "Snapshot?"

Subaru: "No…"

Subaru ran his hand over his chin as he answered Elsa's question, thinking.

He may not have been Elsa, but Subaru had a heart that felt sympathy and outrage like any other. And that heart demanded that he repay those women who had cried out for death.

And so, Subaru ordered Elsa:

Subaru: "Throw it into a weaker part of the fire. We'll watch it burn."

Elsa: "Very well, understood."

Elsa acquiesced to Subaru's cruel instructions, not seeming to disagree in the slightest.

She proceeded to throw the cursed Regulus onto a pile of smoldering wood waste at the far end of the burning manor.

Subaru and Elsa: "――――"

As his body burned, to be roasted in the flames until death, the man's scream echoed across the night sky. Their expressions unchanged, Subaru and Elsa watched him die.

Elsa: "An insect, for the way its noise is soothing, would be preferable to him."

Once the long, long, death rattle ended, Elsa gave her opinion. And Subaru agreed.

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――For Subaru, the shattering glass carried the sound of broken trust.

??? : "It is…"

???: "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to do that. I really, really didn't mean to."

His voice trembling with shock, the man leaned his elbow on the counter. But it wasn't enough to support him, and his upper body slipped, tipping his chair over and causing him to collapse onto the inn floor.

Caught in the fall, the glass and bottle on the counter fell, shattering on the floor and staining the man's white uniform with the smell of alcohol.

His limbs were no longer functioning properly, his life slowly slipping away. His lips were turning purple, his vision growing blurrier and blurrier as he blinked and blinked, trying to fend off his impending death. Subaru watched the man's frantic struggle from his seat at the table.

The man's face was refined. His body was lithe, and his manner when he entered the tavern, as well as his speech when he addressed his friend, were of great elegance. Indeed, the noblest of Knights.

Subaru: "I agree with being called the greatest of the Knights, Julius Juukulius-san."

Julius: "Curse you…"

Subaru: "But, if you had thought more about your position, you would have benefited from being a little more considerate of others. You are the Knight of a Royal Selection candidate who is at the height of her popularity. You must take into account the fact that it is not only your mistress, but you as well who will be targeted. Although…"

Subaru stood up, pontificating to Julius, who was panting in agony, and extended his hand. His hand's trajectory traveled toward the person sitting in the chair next to the fallen Julius.

Linen-colored cat ears and adorable features. Subaru gently pulled her delicate shoulders closer to him and deigned to pat her head. With that gesture alone, Blue's eyes relaxed into intoxicated ecstasy.

Julius: "Fél, are… you…"

Subaru: "You know it took a lot of effort to take advantage of her grief? I never thought I'd end up going to such lengths for someone's life other than hers. But it paid off."

Julius: "What plan are you…"

Subaru: "This has nothing to do with you anymore. Relax. The way I see it, if you die, your mistress won't suffer any harm and things will be fine for her. I don't know what will happen if she mobilizes, though."

Julius's yellow eyes flickered through a chaotic mixture of confusion and rage, grief and agitation, pain and suspicion.

But not a single one of those crazy emotions meant anything.

Subaru: "An old friend invites you for a drink, and with the first sip you reap this. Trust is truly a sweet poison, Mister Greatest Knight. You drowned in it, and you miscalculated."

Julius: "…oi…son."

Subaru: "It's really nice to be someone to be proud of. Life is so easy it's enviable. But you're dead."

Subaru crouched down and observed Julius's face. He wasn't even looking at Subaru. He wasn't concerned about the man who had ordered his death.

What lay in his eyes was his concern for his friend, forced to commit murder against his will, and his penance for his absent mistress――

Julius: "――――"

Subaru: "A Knight to the end. It disgusts me."

Subaru spat this out as he stared at Julius's dead face, forever silent.

The nauseated feeling in his chest probably came from the fact that Subaru had absolutely no reason to kill the greatest of the Knights.

This was the first time Subaru had ordered a death without justification.

He didn't mind seeing cultists or Archbishops die. But this time, the murder was purely a result of Subaru choosing the easiest to torment.

He was less cautious than Anastasia Hoshin, always surrounded by guards, and above all, Blue, whom he had coaxed into becoming dependent on him, was usable on him.

Blue: "Did I do the right thing, Subaru-sama?"

Subaru: "You did well. Sorry for making you do it."

Blue asked Subaru quietly, standing by his side as Subaru witnessed Julius's death. Subaru shrugged and gave him another slap.

If that was enough to calm his unstable mind, then he would pat him as many times as needed.

Blue: "That's fine, as long as it helps you, Subaru-sama. After all, doing this was necessary to create the future you and His Highness desired, wasn't it? Right?"

Subaru: "Yes, that's true. That's why we couldn't leave your friend alive."

Blue: "Yes…"

Blue's face was devoid of emotion, but his friend's death seemed to fracture his mind as he clung to Subaru's sleeve, as if to fill the emptiness in his heart.

The aroma of death hung in the air. When,

???: "――Oh, are you busy?"

The entrance to a place where no one should enter opened, and a delicate-looking man entered the inn.

For a moment, Subaru considered silencing the witness, but fortunately, there was no need to silence this man. He was an insider.

Subaru: "You're really on time."

???: "I am. Time is limited, and we merchants believe that time is money."

Subaru: "Look at you, calling yourself a merchant again, that's bold. You're more of a merchant of death."

???: "I really don't have an answer for that."

It was a thin, gray-haired man who scratched his head in response to Subaru.

With his sleek black suit and black tie, he might have looked like someone returning from a funeral, but a closer look revealed the indecipherable scent of death upon him.

His features were soft, as were his eyes; the way he looked around revealed a clear distrust of others, and indicated that he had survived massacres.

But most of all, Subaru loved his mournful eyes. They were the eyes of someone who saw no benefit in staying alive, who had lost sight of any reason to live, and yet chose to continue living as an animated corpse. Eyes similar in nature to Blue's.

Subaru: "Your name… I don't think I know it."

???: "I've never introduced myself, and I don't intend to. Naturally, I have no desire to ask your name either, dear customer. This way we can both relax."

Subaru: "Well, you're right. Since it's not like we can be friends."

???: "Exactly. We would become enemies the instant something happened. And isn't what we see here the result of calling such people friends?"

The man joked as he stared at Julius's corpse, and at Blue, who had clung to Subaru. Acquiring the poison and the subsequent cleanup were things Subaru had arranged by collaborating with this man. Because right now, Subaru was walking some pretty dangerous tightropes.

Subaru: "Thank Russell for me. I'm still counting on you for that. After all, you're his right hand."

???: "This man's right hand is at the end of his arm. What I am is a slave."

He thought rationally , Subaru thought fondly of the man's realistic response. While also feeling a certain regret.

If they could be friends, they would surely be good friends.

※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※

Subaru multiplied secret operations to eradicate the candidates and the Archbishops who got in his way.

A mysterious group, a plethora of dangerous people, and most importantly, a place where no one interfered too much in each other's business.

The Witch Cult had been a very convenient charade for Subaru.

A charade he would eventually have to eradicate, yes, but by using them with that prerequisite in mind, he could eliminate them with so little guilt it was refreshing.

He didn't feel the slightest trace of camaraderie, even towards the Archbishops.

He constantly monitored them for openings, pondered ways to kill them, tested, and if the plan seemed successful, he would lay the groundwork. Even if he failed, Subaru had the power to reset the world and try again.

Despite everything, Subaru, in his situation, had managed to establish relationships that could perhaps be described as complicit.

Even though he knew not to trust a single cultist, and that he shouldn't bring other people into the picture.

Meili: "But haven't we always worked together, from the beginning? It makes me happy that you let me help you with all this fun stuff, onii-san."

Elsa: "I don't particularly intend to support you unconditionally, but even now, you're thinking about killing me if you get the chance. For some reason, I find that really enjoyable."

Blue: "His Highness's dream will come true if you're here, Subaru-sama. And so, I'll always stay with you. …But, huh? Subaru-sama, when, where did you and His Highness become…"

???: "Our relationship definitely boils down to requests for dirty work. Accomplices? A stupid idea. We're both filial disinherited people who can't show their faces to their families. It would be nicer to die if I could."

Roswaal: "I've gone far enough that one more step, just one more step, is all it takes for my wish to be granted. If that's the purpose of my actions, then I'll sell my soul to a demon. A demon that bears your name, of course."

――Subaru didn't find his actions praiseworthy, far from it.

However, before he could even realize it, individuals had appeared to approve of his actions. And perhaps this fact was his comfort.

Using the power of Reversible Death, Natsuki Subaru fought hard, hoping to save Emilia. He had always thought the fight would be solitary, that he would fight only by himself.

And perhaps the fact that, at some unknown moment, he had ceased to be alone was――

※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※

Rezero Web Novel Fr 4.5 · Re:Zero OST Ayamatsu IF by Hazark

A blaze engulfed the capital. Subaru gasped in pain, staring at the sky.

He felt very conscious.

The pain burned, but it made his mind more sober than fuzzy. Everything, from what had happened to why he was there, was clear.

In his arms, Subaru cradled a motionless Meili.

Her open eyes were devoid of life, staring at a place absent from this world. Her cheeky attitude, her honeyed voice, her tantrums when she was treated like a child――Subaru would never see them again.

――After all, this was where Subaru had arrived after returning from the dead.

The starting point of Reversible Death could change, but Subaru had never gone back further than a previous starting point.

This was where the origin point of Reversible Death had shifted, and since the Meili in his arms was a corpse, her life could not be saved.

Realizing he was only comforting his own heart, Subaru gently closed Meili's eyes. He had no right to pray for the posthumous happiness of a dead person. His hands were far too stained with blood.

And it was the same for Meili. She had committed so many misdeeds that she could not hope for peace after death. Piling sin upon sin, the chains binding Subaru's group to hell would never be undone.

Subaru: "But even so…"

An encounter with death could not be a reason to give up.

Hadn't he arrived here by dying multiple times? More than a thousand, ten thousand times, he had already denigrated life and desecrated lives, eager to grant his own wish, and so he had arrived here.

He had nearly collapsed in the agony of death many times. But each time he did, a fire had burned in his heart.

That very first fire, the touch of those fingers, was what had brought Subaru to this point. He was now only one step away from fulfilling his deepest desire.

He had made victims, sacrifices, to finally get to this point. And yet――

???: "――That's enough."

The voice descended, vicious, from the heights.

"Fire engulfs the Capital" was not a figurative expression. The face that appeared on top of that hill, as if gathering the furious blaze within itself, was dazzling.

Subaru: "Reinhard van Astreaaaa…."

Reinhard: "It seems I don't need to introduce myself. I don't have much to tell you either."

Reinhard's blue eyes pierced Subaru's knees.

The gleam in his eyes was different from what Subaru had seen long ago, as charged with emotion as they were.

This man, who had remained calm in the face of a slaughter, was, in front of Subaru――the emotion was so intense that it was almost indescribable――prey to hatred.

Subaru: "So you are capable of hating people after all, Master Swordsman!"

Reinhard: "It surprises me too. I didn't think I had these feelings."

Subaru: "So you've discovered a new you. Congratulations. Happy birthday, Reinhard."

Reinhard: "Unfortunately, today is not the day I was born. But it will be the day you die."

Subaru could spout off incoherent sentences all he wanted. A man of Reinhard's caliber wouldn't be deterred. Struck by Reinhard's death sentence, a smile crept across Subaru's face.

He had broken his impassive face, and brought out the emotions buried within. Subaru knew it was completely useless, but it was the only thing he could boast about.

Subaru: "Don't make me laugh, Reinhard! Master Swordsman! Sword of the Kingdom! You're a Knight protecting the Kingdom of Lugnica?! Have you protected any kingdoms? What are you saying about all this!"

Reinhard: "――――"

Subaru shouted, arms outstretched, spitting into the air.

The two faced each other in front of the palace gates. Everything visible of the Capital from this vantage point was engulfed in flames—or rather, it wasn't just the Capital.

This fire raged throughout the territories of the Kingdom of Lugnica.

No matter how strong Reinhard was or how talented a Knight he was, what could he do alone? He couldn't do anything. This was Subaru's conclusion.

Subaru: "This is my gift to you! A trap I set up to kill you!"

Reinhard: "To kill me…?"

Subaru: "How many times do you think I've tried to kill you?! How many times, dozens, hundreds, and thousands of times, do you think I've faced you?"

Reinhard: "――――"

Subaru's incomprehensible yells caused Reinhard's cheeks to stiffen in confusion. He wouldn't understand. No one but Subaru ever would.

Subaru had already gone through every imaginable form of trial and error to kill Reinhard.

He had studied Reinhard van Astrea, researched him thoroughly, tested every idea he could think of, tinkered with his plans, used every possible avenue he could imagine to try to kill Reinhard. But no matter what methods Subaru used, Reinhard had outdone them. As if Natsuki Subaru's hideously weak brain, as if her mere presence, couldn't affect him in the slightest.

Subaru had sacrificed Elsa, Meili, Blue, the man who could have been his friend, the clown who had proclaimed himself his accomplice, the Witch Cult, the Archbishops, every crime, injustice, and infamy imaginable, but he had failed to kill Reinhard.

And so, with no way to cut Reinhard's life, Subaru made a decision.

Subaru: "I kill what you are as a Knight. I let your ostentatious name of Master Swordsman fall to the earth, stamping my feet on it, spitting saliva and phlegm on it!"

Reinhard: "All that, just for that."

Subaru: "Just for that! Yes, I did it, just for that! Just for that, I used the lives of everyone there to bring you down to earth!"

Subaru placed Meili's body on the ground. He pointed at Reinhard. Reinhard couldn't hide the fact that he was shaken. It felt good.

Subaru: "You are a hero, Reinhard. I cannot kill you. But I can kill a hero. ――Here is how to kill you, Reinhard."

Reinhard: "――――"

Subaru boasted, his voice distorted, at Reinhard's silence.

He had worked with all his might, tried so many plans, sacrificed people, shed blood, accumulated deaths, and finally.

With Meili protecting him and allowing him to survive, Subaru had finally managed to face Reinhard like this.

After accumulating so many sacrifices, he had finally managed to stand on the same stage as Reinhard.

Subaru: "…Why?"

The warm breeze swept away Subaru's previous momentum. His voice was frail when he spoke.

Subaru: "Why are you so strong? Why are you so strong, that I had to let them die to match you?"

A trembling voice, interrupted by sobs. Hearing this, Reinhard's face stiffened.

He probably had no idea what Subaru was thinking. Of course he didn't. Subaru himself hadn't the slightest idea.

He didn't know why he was crying. How long had it been since he had shed tears? Surely, that day he had been brought into this world was the last.

The tears of the day that had brought Natsuki Subaru to this spectacle of flames were the last.

Subaru: "I wish I were like you. I wish I were honest like you, strong enough to save everyone like you. I think you're enviable. I think you're despicable."

Reinhard: "You…"

Natsuki Subaru's true feelings flowed out with her tears.

During the very first loop in the Capital, when Natsuki Subaru saw the man who had freed him from an endless cycle.

――Back then, Subaru had been jealous of Reinhard.

He had been disemboweled several times, had suffered death, but still could not change anything. Subaru's heart had quickly torn open, his outer skin had peeled off, and then, practically by coincidence, as if he had kicked a pebble in the road, he had changed his fate just as easily.

Subaru yearned for this strength, envied it, regretted it, hated it.

Subaru: "――I wanted to be you, Reinhard."

Reinhard: "――I don't understand you."

Reinhard dismissed Subaru's honesty as worthless nonsense.

And he's right. Reinhard, you're a hero, you're always, always right.

Where had the mistake occurred? At what point had Natsuki Subaru made a mistake?

He didn't know. Although, in fact, he did. But no one would be able to understand it. That's why. It was exactly for that reason.

Natsuki Subaru had been an insufferable lunatic for a long time already.

Reinhard: "――――"

Reinhard closed his eyes and bent down. He wasn't reaching for a sword. Which meant that even he didn't think a weapon was necessary to defeat Subaru.

He was right, he was absolutely right. One blow from him and Subaru's fragile body would be disintegrated. So, at the very least, and the absolute minimum—

???: "――Don't you think it's too soon to give up?"

Reinhard: "You!"

The instant Reinhard began his charge, a black figure approached him. A discordant noise was heard as Reinhard responded to the figure's slash with his hand, held flat and open like a blade.

It was stupid. How could he face a knife swung with such momentum with his hand? The knife clanged, shattering into pieces. It was stupid. Why was it the knife that was shattering?

???: "You really are out of the ordinary, aren't you?"

Elsa, covered in blood, spun through the air before landing on her hands and feet. Subaru thought she was dead. He thought he'd used her as a chess piece to create this situation, he believed her life had burned for nothing, and he'd acted with that in mind. And yet.

Elsa: "Apparently, I'm not dead. Although in this situation, I feel like I'm visiting death again."

Subaru: "Elsa…"

Elsa: "So Meili is dead. My poor sister."

Noticing Meili lying on the ground, Elsa whispered this with a hint of sadness.

But she shifted gears in the blink of an eye, turning to face Reinhard properly.

Elsa: "It seems you're my sister's enemy too. Shall we dance?"

Reinhard: "You've already lost your weapon. And do you understand who exactly you're protecting?"

Elsa: "Difficult subjects aren't my favorite. I do what I want to do. This man behind me lets me do what I want to do. That makes him a valuable client."

Licking her lips, Elsa gave an answer based on logic only murderers could understand. Reinhard swallowed and positioned himself to take Elsa on as his opponent.

Elsa: "This will be my last chance to do it. I had fun. It was wonderful."

Subaru: "Elsa! I…!"

Elsa: "Goodbye."

As always, the farewell was gentle and without any consideration for Subaru's ideas. Immediately afterward, Elsa leaped with animal dexterity into a dance toward Reinhard, the hero and the butcher engaging in a furious battle.

In a short time, Elsa Granhiert's last blood meal would come to an end.

Subaru: "――Fuck!"

Subaru couldn't die here.

Looking away from Elsa's fight and Meili's corpse, he dashed down the hill.

The roar of battle echoed behind him in the distance.

Buildings collapsed one after another in the burning capital, screams and moans echoed through the inferno. Children called for their parents, parents called for their children, men called for women, women called for men in the howling pandemonium of the inferno.

Yes. This was the hell Subaru had created.

He had created this hell, destroyed Reinhard's false image, and achieved his goal.

All that remained was――

Subaru: "Y-you are…."

??? : "――σσσσ."

Subaru staggered, nearly tripping and falling, when a massive beast grabbed him in its mouth and threw him onto its back. Subaru desperately clung to the beast's black hide as it appeared before him, as well as its ferocious lion face as he ran.

Subaru: "You are… but Meili is already dead…"

It was one of the demonic beasts Meili controlled, carrying Subaru as he raced through the burning capital.

The ferocious Guiltylowe sprinted with Natsuki Subaru on its back. It no longer had a master, and was under no obligation to obey him—but the Guiltylowe still carried Natsuki Subaru with all its heart.

Subaru: "Please find her. She must be out there somewhere…"

Subaru prayed, wishing that the Guiltylowe would perform a miracle.

What could he call this feeling in his heart? Relief? Resignation? Trapped in mysterious emotions, Natsuki Subaru's mind oscillated between consciousness and unconsciousness.

But what really pushed him to his limits was what happened next.

???: "――That's enough!"

The sharp ice projectile skewered the sprinting Guiltylowe in the flank.

The Guiltylowe screamed, tripping over its own feet before crashing to the ground. Caught in the beast's fall, Subaru also hit the stone pavement.

Subaru: "Ghau… what was that…"

His vision blurred with pain as he forced his eyes open, looking around to see what had happened.

He saw that the Guiltylowe had straightened up, countless stalactites embedded in its left flank, as it faced a figure shrouded in a faint light, about to charge.

The Guiltylowe raised its vicious paw and roared. Perhaps it was its dignity as a demonic beast, or its pride in being the last animal to obey young Meili to the end.

His blow was more than strong enough to tear a human being into pieces.

However, before the blow could land, a sharp piece of ice tumbled down――

――To invade the Guiltylowe's open maw, piercing its throat before entering its chest again, piercing its rear, transforming it into a demonic beast on a staff.

Immediately following this devastating but non-fatal attack, the air echoed and crackled as a white frost spread over the Guiltylowe's entire body, transforming it into an ice sculpture.

After witnessing the Guiltylowe's death, Subaru slowly stood up.

He couldn't lift his left arm. It might have dislocated in the fall. He should be feeling pain intense enough to burst into tears, but his brain wasn't.

After all, if Subaru started yelling right now, in this place, it would ruin everything.

???: "――That's enough, you unbeliever."

The two faced each other, the cityscape ablaze on either side of them, a frozen demonic beast between them.

Amethyst eyes filled with duty and indignation met dark eyes filled with irrepressible joy.

Lunar-colored silver hair, finely cut amethyst eyes. Her celestial face electrified Subaru's heart without fail, and the silver chime of her voice resonated with him like a fairy's aria.

What he had pursued, sought, desired, and never stopped loving, her face, was here.

Subaru: "――Emilia."

Emilia: "Do you know me?"

Emilia's eyebrows raised in surprise. Seeing this made Subaru laugh.

It was exactly as he had imagined it—no. Exactly as he had imagined it when they had first met and ventured into the Capital together.

She had no idea how much national attention was being focused on her as a Royal Selection candidate. It wasn't as if she lacked self-awareness; she had low self-esteem.

Although she was known throughout the world as the heroine who had exterminated Sloth, Greed, Gluttony, Anger and Lust from the Witch Cult, scourges that had tormented the population for centuries.

And his record was going to, on this day, at this moment, reach its peak.

Emilia: "Is there something funny?"

Subaru: "No, I'm sorry. I'm just, how can I put it, happy. It's that kind of thing, where you feel good. You haven't changed at all, so I feel like I've been rewarded."

Emilia: "What do you mean? When did you and I…?"

Emilia tried a frantic search through her memories.

But Natsuki Subaru didn't exist anywhere in his memories.

Of course not. Their momentary encounter existed only within Subaru. And it was this unique moment, this final commitment to penance, that had brought Natsuki Subaru here.

Emilia: "You are…"

???: "Lia, this isn't good. Don't take everything he says seriously."

Subaru: "――Puck, huh."

Emilia searched her memories for a clue. But she was interrupted by the gray cat that appeared on her shoulder, a Spirit Subaru remembered well.

His memories of that day were distant. But that was exactly why he had spent even more time thinking about that day incessantly than he had actually remembering it individually.

It was inconceivable that he would forget someone who occupied a part of that memory.

Puck: "How nice of you to call me by my name so casually. With the flamboyance of your crimes, how do you plan to pay enough compensation to settle them?"

Subaru: "I'll pay compensation. Exactly what you want. ――I have no way to escape anyway."

Puck: "――? That's pretty classy of you. Suspicious."

Subaru unzipped his tracksuit and spread his arms, showing that he wasn't resisting.

A tracksuit. Yes, the tracksuit. He had taken the tracksuit he had kept sealed until that day and was wearing it now. He had decided that if he were to have a reunion with Emilia, this would be the most appropriate.

While longing for the day he would wear that outfit, and stand before her again.

Subaru: "Everything I'm about to tell you is crazy. Please don't hold it against you."

Emilia: "――Huh?"

Subaru: "I'm the one who set the Capital ablaze. And it's not just the Capital—this fire is destined to burn the entire country. No one can protect themselves from it. It's the nation, and the Knights who protect this nation, who mishandled the situation."

Subaru's choppy speech was very disconcerting to Emilia. Puck wasn't sure whether to stop Subaru's speech, but he abandoned his attack after seeing Emilia's stance.

Grateful for this, Subaru continued.

Subaru: "Reinhard's prestige as a Master Swordsman is shattered. Since we don't know what triggered the Pact that's supposed to protect the Dragon Kingdom of Lugnica, the Dragon isn't spared either. This is something I've tested countless times, so it's absolutely true. In the end, Reinhard and the Dragon are evenly matched."

Emilia: "Burn the country? You're burning the country? To try to destroy this nation?"

Subaru: "No, that's not true. I'm doing this so you can become the ruler. It's the only way to achieve that."

Emilia: "――――"

A smile spread across Subaru's face as Emilia's eyes opened, completely shaken. There was no way anything Subaru was saying would make any sense to her.

Since he'd warned them that these were ramblings, he didn't mind if he didn't communicate properly. That was Subaru's deepest wish, if it was going to yield results.

Subaru: "The flames of death are leading the nation to destruction—the one who kills the culprit behind all this won't be Reinhard, nor the Dragon, it will be you. None of the remaining Selection candidates can top that. The heroine who broke four centuries of stagnation and saved the world is you!"

Emilia: "That's not… What are you saying?! Stop, I don't understand! I don't understand a word you're saying!!"

Emilia clutched her head and covered her ears, trying to keep Subaru's words from coming out. Tears were streaming from her eyes, and as he saw one trickle down her pale cheek, a soft thud hit Subaru's chest.

Part of it was guilt for making her cry. Another part came from seeing how his actions had shaken her heart, and the resulting dark joy.

Subaru: "You don't have to understand. It's good that you don't. Everything that comes after that will be taken care of when others support you on their own. Then you'll just have to grant your wish. That's the only reason I set the country on fire. All of that was for you."

Emilia: "Liar, liar, liar! I mean, I… you, how come, you…"

Emilia lamented the devotion she had never anticipated, and the offerings she had never desired. It was inevitable that she would be sad. It was inevitable that she could not understand.

Subaru knew he was wrong. Subaru knew he was wrong.

Subaru knew this method would not bring Emilia joy.

But it was the only method he had.

Grant Emilia's wish, make Emilia the ruler, and demonstrate his feelings for Emilia.

With these things in mind, and knowing from the start that he was wrong, Subaru had arrived here.

And so Natsuki Subaru laughed. Snickered. Smiled.

Subaru: "――Look at me, Emilia. Look at me, hate me, remember me."

Emilia: "Who are you? Who are you exactly…?"

Emilia asked, her voice trembling, as Subaru slowly approached her, arms wide open. Subaru closed his eyes.

He felt like he had been waiting for this moment forever.

The desire to answer this question in Emilia's presence, since always――

Subaru: "――My name is Natsuki Subaru."

Emilia: "Su… baru…"

Just hearing that faint call of his name was enough to send a flood of emotions rushing through him. An emotion so great that, for that alone, Subaru was completely satisfied to have arrived here.

With these feelings in his heart, and praying that he could finish this sentence without his voice shaking because of them――

Subaru: "――Archbishop of Sin of the Witch Cult representing Pride, Natsuki Subaru!"

Emilia: "Archbishop…!"

Presenting himself as best he could, Subaru put all his strength into his legs and kicked the ground.

Natsuki Subaru concentrated all his scattered strength into a single point of his body for the final sprint of his life.

He had sacrificed many people, mistreated those who could be his accomplices, found comfort in those with whom he might have had ties, and now finally arriving with this beloved girl――

Subaru: "I am the man who burned the world, shook the country, killed the hero, and――"

Emilia: "――――"

Subaru: "――that you're going to kill."

Feeling the impact pierce his chest, Subaru smiled.

He fell to his knees, unable to support himself before he collapsed, tumbling. He would never reach Emilia, his body dragging gracefully across the stone.

Emilia: "Why?"

Subaru closed his eyes, ready to accept the end, when something prompted him to lift his eyelids. Emilia was standing right next to him, looking down at him. One of the tears that fell from her eyes landed on Subaru's cheek, causing him to open his eyes.

Emilia: "Why?"

Repeated, overlapping questions.

What could this "why" possibly mean , Subaru wondered.

Why did you do that?

Why did it have to be like this?

Why did you come here to die for me?

There was definitely a lot of "why" in that question.

And he would like to answer all of them, but Subaru had very little time left.

So he let his last breath carry his answer.

Subaru: "――I love you."

※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※

Death was approaching. An old and familiar death.

Every time Subaru encountered death, he was taken to a dark, lonely, and unfamiliar place. And it was truly, truly a lonely place, a place where it was unbearable to be alone.

Every time Subaru had met death, he had been sent out of this place.

In this world of blood and anguish, of tears and misfortune, with a very slight presence of love.

But it was good now. He was satisfied.

??? : "――――"

Subaru felt like someone in this dark world had whispered something to him.

It was comforting, it was encouraging, it was a confirmation, it was a confession.

But why? She wasn't the lover Subaru was looking for.

His lover was somewhere else, somewhere he wasn't, with his dream come true and his efforts rewarded.

Subaru had sacrificed many people, and ultimately himself, for this purpose.

And so, that was good. He didn't need to be saved. Comfort and salvation were what he'd already had, to begin with.

??? : "――――"

Calling him definitely.

Calling his name with kindness, with pity, with love.

And so Subaru separated himself from the spiral of death, while accepting this distant presence. While accepting it, he responded to the words of this ▒▒▒▒.

??? : "――――"

――Even if you reject me, I will never forget you.

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END


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