Chapter 8
“Hm… Where should we start. Actually to me, it didn’t matter who it was. Why’d you have to tempt me like that in my own room?”
Right? You wanted me to be tempted, right?
Carynne caressed Nancy’s hair as she chuckled. The maid’s straight black hair was loose, then eye contact was made with dark blue irises. As expected, murder was the right choice. Won’t she be able to take pleasure in seeing all different sides of one person?
“You mentioned that you’re exhausted from working and that you want a vacation, and thanks to that, the other servants think you’ve left. And then you ate everything I gave you… and you fell asleep right away.”
“……”
So it’s your fault.
She cuddled the maid’s face. How warm.
“You know, Nancy. I’ve been dreaming. For a hundred years.”
“……”
It’s difficult to see Nancy’s expression because her mouth was gagged, and it was hard to gauge her emotions just by looking at her eyes. Eyeballs would only capture light, and a person’s expression eventually would get expressed through their facial muscles.However, Nancy’s mouth was gagged, so it was hard to guess what she was thinking just by judging the wrinkles around her eyes. Carynne was curious about what Nancy would say, but she held that urge in. If the maid were to scream, Carynne would be in trouble.
“Yes… For a hundred years, I died again and again. Everyone’s been trying to kill me and kill me again. So you know, I’ll try it this time. It’s my first time killing, so I don’t think I’ll do well—but I think I can do it well enough since I’ve suffered the same thing a lot of times.”
She pushed Nancy to the floor. The thick rug cancelled out the noise. The maid struggled. Carynne took out one of her own mufflers. This opportunity was just too good. This afternoon, Nancy had complained about Isella’s rudeness and asked Carynne for time off.
And it looked like she went out and bought alcohol in the city today. She smelled faintly of alcohol. While going back for a moment to take something she left behind, and when asked if there’s anything she wanted, Nancy asked if she could get time off for a week. That was the only thing.
It’s such… such a good feeling to kill.
“You killed me a few decades ago. Why did you do that? Ah, I’m not blaming you.”
To cheer her up, Carynne gave her a mixture of some of Dullan’s drugs in the food. Not standing for Isella’s violence earlier during the day, another maid had put it in Isella’s food, and with Nancy’s habit of eating leftovers often, she also ate the same thing without much hesitation.
“I’m just curious. It hurt quite a bit… But after that, I only felt very curious.”
But Carynne couldn’t exactly listen to the reason now…
“Can you tell me next time?”
Carynne went on top of Nancy. She could feel the maid’s pounding heart. It was a resilient body. Carynne was excited about how Nancy wriggled between her thighs. A sense of euphoria soared.
“I’ll die by your hands next time I return.”
And Carynne strangled Nancy.
* * *
Recalling that moment, Carynne shuddered in excitement. That moment could only be described as one thing, and it was love. Her trembling hands over cloth, a sense of domination over another. Perhaps fate killed her because this feeling was so addicting.
And here, another woman was entertaining Carynne. She even wanted to kiss Isella in the anticipation she felt. All of these characters were so lovely. What will you do, hm? Will you scream? Will you look for your oh so great father? Will you cry and look for Raymond when he’s not even here?
“Don’t be frightened.”
“…Yes.”
Isella was holding Carynne’s hand, relying on her as they walked. Haha! There’s nothing to be afraid of! I’m not going to kill you now! Because I’ll go to your mansion and I’ll kill more, so more people! There’s too few people in this house…
She could barely hold back the laughter that was threatening to flow out of her lips.
“R… Really. I don’t like weird things…”
“Yes, yes.”
Carynne answered Isella with a kind voice, smiling.
It was a smile that made her look like a warm-hearted older sister taking care of a scared child. Isella had lashed out to her childishly and already hated the young woman who she was trying to have the upper hand with, but at this moment, she was just captivated by Carynne’s smile. It really looked like Carynne was a goddess promising Isella that there was nothing to worry.
“There’s nothing to be afraid of.”
So that fear was forgotten.
The door was opened.
* * *
“Really, I don’t know what illusion it was that I saw.”
It was her clothes and bedsheets stained with menstrual blood that created that illusion. The combination of her sensitive body over her pillows due to her menstruation, the necklace and the maid making the mistake of leaving behind a hat just to deceive Isella. She was relieved. If she had gone to her father and got scolded, she would have been humiliated in front of others with all the shouting he might have done.
Sighing, Isella sat on the bed.
She seemed to have gotten flustered at just the sight of blood. And the necklace and hat. Isella picked up her necklace, which she had been looking all over the place for. She saw it wrong because she had gotten so tired after this long day. It’s obvious. Isella clutched her necklace and turned to Carynne.
She saw it wrong. Everything. Isella was relieved.
“I apologize, Lady Hare.”
“……”
“I wish to sleep in another room. Can I retire in the next room?”
“……”
But Carynne didn’t say anything, instead having a slightly scary expression. Isella called Carynne once more.
“Hare?”
“That’s… a relief. Yes, of course. The next room is empty, so you can rest there. I’ll have the maids clean this room tomorrow.”
Taak.
Carynne opened the door to the next room and guided Isella.
“Please use this room.”
“Thank you.”
Relief washing over her after her fear went away, Isella felt that she was closer to Carynne. She wanted to talk to her more, but Carynne closed the door, saying that it was already late.
Isella preciously held her necklace in her hands and closed her eyes. She won’t lose it again. Sir Raymond. How soon can I see you again? I’m nervous, I’m tired, so please. I miss you.
“……”
She knew it, the maid did not have her head chopped off. Was the maid bothered that much when she scratched her with her fingernails? Isella went to sleep with the lingering thought of, ‘I should ask that maid to serve me something with apples¹ in it.’
It was such a tiring and painstaking day.
* * *
Carynne closed the door and collapsed to the floor, much like Isella did a while ago.
The corpse disappeared.
Carynne was always aware that she was crazy.
So this fact couldn’t be anything surprising. After living stagnantly for the past 100 years, it’s natural to think that she couldn’t possibly be sane. She even kept in mind that she might simply just be deluding herself.
If antiquated epistemology states that souls would leave, it should have been impossible. So when the corpse disappeared, what Carynne felt was neither fear nor shock.
“…How dare.”
It was anger.
She’s mine! Who even dared to do this! How can you be so cruel?! Why are you making it so boring!
Carynne wanted to see Isella faint out of horror. At best Carynne wanted to see Isella shiver not because of a man, but for her to be so terrified of a primal fear. With a hideously distorted expression, go pray, be shocked, beg. Like me! But who—who was it that interfered? There was no evidence or hints or anything!
Her anger was directed at the unknown first, and then it was turned to herself.
If it’s not God or other external factors, she should punish herself for going off the rails and fantasizing it all. She should blame her mind. Carynne poured out all that anger towards herself.
Bang!
She hit her own head against a wall.
Blood trickled down. She could feel pain. She knew she was crazy, but at the very least, she wished to see the fantasy she wanted to see. If this was a hallucination or a delusion, in the end, the only punishment she could inflict was towards herself.
Thud!
She felt the skin on her forehead being torn. She wanted to voluntarily end it like this. Even so, she would eventually return to the same garden. No, in any case, voluntarily doing it to herself had never been successful, and she would just end up staying in bed for an entire year before going back in time again.
¹ ‘apple’ and ‘apology’ are the same word in Korean