Re: Naruto Uzumaki

Here's @riojiyo131, your trusted writer.

You can now get early access to Chapter 112 of Re: Naruto Uzumaki on my Patreon. You can also read up to Chapter 37 of Satoru Senju: Conquering the Omniverse!

patreon.com/riojiyo131

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Clink, clink, clink...

The sound of slot machines filled the air, mingling with laughter and murmurs. Naruto sat across from Tsunade at a table set apart from all the noise and people.

Shizune, standing behind her teacher, held Tonton firmly in her arms, looking at her reproachfully, as if that alone could stop Tsunade from gambling.

Upon seeing him, Tsunade flashed a confident smile.

"I suppose you've heard it's easy to beat me, huh, brat?" she frowned and gave the table a soft knock with her knuckles. "Well, don't think it'll be that easy! I'm on a roll today! Luck is on my side!"

With the same hand she had used to hit the table, she raised a bottle of sake and drank it all in one go, as if it were water.

Shizune facepalmed in resignation. Her teacher was beyond saving...

Even Naruto frowned in distaste. He didn't drink himself; alcohol dulled the senses, and that was something he preferred to avoid.

"Let's not talk about luck. I got a second chance at life," Naruto muttered with amusement, resting an elbow on the table.

In the whole world, no one was luckier than he was.

"Get ready to watch me empty your pockets, kid!" Tsunade pulled out a deck of Hanafuda cards, clicking her tongue with excitement.

Shizune turned pale.

"T-Tsunade-sama... y-you've never won at cards..."

Tsunade waved her hand as if swatting a fly.

"You worry too much, Shizune. Haven't you seen how my day is going? I'm unstoppable. It's impossible for me to lose..."

But Shizune didn't feel even a bit reassured. In fact, quite the opposite.

She knew how these days ended. When Tsunade won as much as she had today, it was practically a prophecy that she'd lose double... or triple.

"Shall we begin? Or do you not have any money...?" Naruto asked with a lopsided, confident smile and a glint of amusement in his eyes.

Money was the one thing he had plenty of.

He still remembered how Gatō had "kindly" named him heir in his will before his tragic end...

And the ROOT bases he dismantled during Orochimaru's attack on Konoha were well-funded. Danzō had never been poor.

"But a little more money never hurts..." he murmured to himself, and for a moment, the symbol of money seemed to reflect in his eyes.

...

Tsunade kept her eyes fixed on the Hanafuda cards before her. She didn't blink, as if the simple act of looking away could alter the game's fate.

Naruto, on the other hand, remained relaxed, chin resting on one hand, with a calm and confident expression, like he was in no rush at all.

He watched Tsunade with a mix of boredom and amusement.

"Are you sure you want to keep going?" he asked, raising an eyebrow while calmly stacking his freshly won money. "You're almost out..."

"Shut up and deal," Tsunade growled, a vein visibly throbbing on her forehead. "This is just getting started."

The next round was quick. Tsunade threw her cards on the table after losing again.

But Naruto didn't flinch at her reaction. He didn't even blink.

Around them, more and more people gathered, drawn by the spectacle. The growing murmurs gave the scene a tension unlike anything else in the gambling hall.

Five minutes later, an expectant silence fell over the table as Naruto laid down his cards with the same ease someone might stretch after a nap.

He had won again...

"Again..." someone whispered in awe.

Tsunade froze. Her once furious expression now shifted to disbelief. She closed her eyes, took a deep breath... and, with slightly trembling hands, pulled the last wad of bills from the inner pocket of her clothing.

She let it fall onto the table, surrendering her money.

"How the hell are you doing this?!" she exploded, slamming both hands on the table. "I'm the best Hanafuda player in history!"

Shizune, behind her, rolled her eyes at the claim. Even Tonton mimicked her, looking up at her with rolled eyes.

"Really?" Naruto tilted his head, shrugging. "I think your little pig would have better luck if she tried. I bet she'd win a round or two before you do."

Tsunade blinked, unsure whether she was more offended by the comment or by how painfully true it felt.

For a moment, she glanced at Tonton, almost considering letting the pig play in her place.

But when she met Shizune's eyes, her student shook her head, and Tsunade dismissed the idea instantly.

Shizune clearly didn't approve.

"Also," Naruto continued with a mischievous grin, "you make a really funny face when you have a bad hand. It's pretty easy to tell when you're doing well and when you're not."

"What...?" Tsunade looked at him as if he'd just revealed some dark secret. "That's cheating!"

"There are no rules against reading your opponent," Naruto replied, shrugging again, with that same lopsided smile that was starting to irritate her... and amuse her, in equal parts.

A few people stifled giggles. Tsunade gritted her teeth... then let out a long sigh before slumping back in her chair, defeated.

"I can't believe it... I lost everything I had, everything I won..."

Naruto stood up, took a couple of bills from the pile, and placed them gently in front of her.

"I'd feel bad if the Fifth Hokage of Konoha had to sleep on the street."

Tsunade looked at him with a mix of surprise and confusion... and then let out a deep, resigned laugh.

"Who do you think you're calling the Fifth Hokage, kid?" she scoffed with a tired smile as she slid the bills toward her and tucked them into her cleavage. "But thanks... brat."

"You, of course. I came to find you so you'd return to Konoha. You've been named a candidate... actually, the only candidate... to become the Fifth Hokage."

Tsunade and Shizune looked at him with a mix of surprise and confusion.

Around the table, several onlookers who had gathered to watch the game now stared at Tsunade with wide eyes. No one seemed to believe that the woman who had just lost all her money to a teenager was none other than Tsunade Senju, one of Konoha's Legendary Three Sannin.

Then, Tsunade closed her eyes, stood up calmly, and turned around without saying a word at first.

"Go back to Konoha and tell that old geezer I'm not interested in his position. Let him find some other fool to carry that burden."

Naruto sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose.

Of course... it wasn't going to be that easy.

Tsunade didn't even seem to know about Hiruzen Sarutobi's death.

"At least you know about Orochimaru's attack on the village, right? The old bastard was killed by him."

Tsunade stopped for a moment. Then she raised her chin slightly.

"Oh, what a shame. Buy the ugliest flowers you can find and drop them on his grave for me, will you?"

Naruto couldn't help but smile. Apparently, Tsunade didn't mourn Hiruzen's death much either.

[Hiruzen Sarutobi: I can't believe it! She cares so little about her master's death?! Tsunadeee!]

Naruto rolled his eyes at Hiruzen's message appearing in the group chat.

[Naruto Uzumaki: Don't you see no one cares about you? Stay quiet, you shitty old man!]

[Hiruzen Sarutobi: Naruto! Snap out of it! I don't know what they've told you about me, but it's all lies! Why has your attitude toward me changed so much?!]

[Naruto Uzumaki: Hey, Tobirama! Are you guys taking a break? Why does the old fart even have time to write in the group chat?]

[Tobirama Senju: Oh, I was chatting with Itama. I thought Madara was still having fun.]

[Madara Uchiha: I finished about 10 minutes ago. It's Indra's turn.]

[Indra Ōtsutsuki: Wait! My turn? No one told me!]

[Hashirama Senju: It's on the calendar in the house I built for you! You can see your turn there!]

[Mito Uzumaki: I'm next!]

[Biwako Sarutobi: You made a schedule for torturing my husband...? That's cruel.]

[Naruto Uzumaki: Don't want to join in...? There's a slot free around 11:15 p.m...]

[Biwako Sarutobi: ...]

[Hiruzen Sarutobi: Biwako, take that slot, I need a break, please...! You have no idea what they've done to me...!]

[Biwako Sarutobi: Husband, I also hold a few grudges against you, you know?]

[Hiruzen Sarutobi: Biwakoooooo...!]