Everyone Wants a Piece
Hentai Shinobi Rule 20: Beware of the dreaded ‘sync.’
***
Kai hadn’t touched one of his unlocked Skill Trees—General Chakra Applications—for a good reason. He had seen its foundational skill after unlocking the Leaf Training Exercise, and it needed a minimum of 100 Perception to begin.
He now knew why.
100 Stats being a benchmark made sense since things changed for Kai. It wasn’t a drastic difference. However, Kai had the time to note the subtle changes. The most evident shift was through his [Perception] since Kai felt the ever-present chakra in the world hanging like a ‘keen’ edge against his neck. A conversation with Mito revealed that the Chakra present in the world differed from the goodness flowing within the Shinobi due to the Shinobi’s inherent will.
If that weren't the case, every Shinobi would have unlimited chakra access at every living moment since everyone could have tapped into the world’s network.
Chakra, being the mix of physical and spiritual energies, naturally had different perceptions for each Shinobi. Sensors were merely an oddity of their kind that could eventually feel the Chakra’s varying intents, navigate it, and identify one’s objectives.
Ordinarily, an academy student would sit cross-legged and focus on their internal forces to manipulate their physical and spiritual energy to ‘mix’ their chakra.
At least that’s what beginner’s training in the [Chakra Spiral Technique] suggested.
This technique was the gateway into the [General Chakra Applications] Skill Tree. This skill emerged to let Kai master whatever the Senju Clan ever created. Mastering the foundations made sense on paper.
Mastering the foundation would make the advanced concepts a walk in the park—Right?
Wrong!
What should Kai do when almost all five skills in the skill tree are B-ranked?
Kai glanced at the skill tree again.
Chakra Spiral led to Shape Transformation, Shape Manipulation, Chakra Flow, and Chakra Enhanced Bukijutsu.
The last three skills were B-ranked.
Still, Kai refused to get distracted. So? It’s B-ranked? Is it advanced? Fuck it. Kai would master them one of these days. There’s no mountain, and babe Kai refused to climb. Sure, the latter was hard since he dazzled all the women in his life to speechlessness, possibly even intimidated with his sheer talent (Bro’s got unknown rizz). However, he would deal with all his issues one of these days.
As they say—
Fuck it. We roll.
Kai barely dodged the punch against his chin. The cold November gusts could not avoid sweat as droplets of it sprinkled every time Kai moved. His opponent was no worse. Their dark and blonde hairs flipped, and they danced a dangerous spar of fists and kicks. Their boots bounced off the hardened, cracked school grounds as the painful impacts of their fists against the opponent’s arm made the witnesses wince.
Spars in the academies would swiftly end. That was the usual norm. However, common sense flew out of the window when the opponents saw fit to elongate the spar—as often was the case with one Kai and Minato Namikaze—since such spars were the only times they got to measure the competition.
They matched with fists, kicks, feints, and grins. However, Kai was above the academy’s wildest imagination. He knew it. The knowledge did not delude Kai to look down on Minato or others since they might have accomplished more than him with his trait—
Hah! As if!
Kai continued to feel his spiritual and physical energy actively supplanting his chakra. Chakra Spiral was by no means a way to recover one’s chakra. The available energy present was too little for a meaningful recovery boost.
Yet, Chakra Spiral was the most basic of basic.
Remember the chat with Orochimaru a few months ago?
The skill expanded on that knowledge. The skill existed to allow the Shinobi to develop an intuition with chakra—a knack, to say. By actively participating in chakra fusion, the Shinobi learned more about the powers within them and the power behind Chakra.
[Chakra Spiral Technique (D) (11→12/20): The myth of the hair’s whorl matching one’s intuitive chakra rotation and fusion has some substance to it. To master chakra, one must begin from its inception—the fusion of physical and spiritual forces in appropriate ratios. Passing your two forces through chakra coils in clockwise, anti-clockwise, and both simultaneous rotations will allow you to control chakra within yourself like few ever managed. Add one stat to Perception and Chakra at every level {If Perception/Chakra<100}.
Next Level: Spend 990/1189 minutes actively fusing chakra {Active Title: Senju Guardian} or 2 SP.
Skill Tree Evolution: Shape Transformation (C) (0/50); Chakra Flow (B)]
[Shape Transformation (C) (0/50) (Locked)
Unlocking Conditions: 5 SP.]
[Chakra Flow (B) (0/10)
Unlocking Conditions: 12 SP; 200 Physique.]
Kai grinned and paused his attack.
“Hmm?” Minato stopped, too. Their gazes met as Kai raised his hands. “I give up. I’m tired.”
Icha-Sensei punctuated his words with a grumble at Kai’s frivolity as Minato exhaled in defeat.
“Form the Seals of Reconciliation.”
Kai and Minato shook fingers before the brunette settled between Kushina and Mikoto. It had been quite nice lately. It was already the third week of November, and Kai’s progress had left its stagnant status. Not only that, the Genjutsu Release training would begin in December. It was one of the optional courses where an expert would test every student and their sensitivity to Chakra to determine if they held the talent to master the basics of Genjutsu.
After all, Genjutsu was a fatal rarity in the world of element jutsus, seals, and taijutsu that a shinobi must never overlook.
As for Mikoto and Kushina, Kai knew why they were quieter these days.
He was WHOLE 2 centimeters taller!
Kai’s days of being oppressed and smothered by their mushing-cheek hands and ruffling-hair palms would end soon!
The moment he gets taller—
Well, Kai hadn’t thought what he’d do. He ought to do something to get even, right?
Kai glanced at Kushina and Mikoto. They both looked lost in their worlds.
‘Heh~!’ Kai felt smug. Indeed, he made them quiver in their boots.
Meanwhile, Kai turned to look at his stats.
[Chakra benchmark accomplished. Choose one of the following titles.]
[Sharp As Fuck: You delude others into believing you’re the most intelligent when in reality, you grasp the way to master your memory.
Effects: Unlocks a unique skill [Mind Library]]
[Fast As Fuck: You delude others into believing you are faster than your peers when in reality, you react better than others.
Effects: Unlocks a unique skill [Dynamic Vision]]
[Restless As Fuck: You delude others into believing you have inexhaustible chakra reserves when in reality, you manipulate your body to digest every bit of intake and rest into physical and mental forces for swifter chakra recovery.
Effects: Unlocks a unique skill [Overdrive]]
Kai looked at his options before selecting [Fast As Fuck.]
[Dynamic Vision (1/1): Capture more than you can imagine with your vision, and a sprinkle of your Chakra’s help to shift your optic nerves for good irreversibly. Adds 50 stats to Perception {If Perception<500.}]
Kai lowered his head. He acted way too casually for someone about to have his eyes and shit rocked.
‘That’s why I wanted the skill description before—’
Kai’s body faintly trembled as his eyes reddened at a pace visible to the naked eye. He didn’t show any expression, yet Kai wanted to bang his head into Mikoto’s lap for the sake of old times and share some of his pain with others. His brain shuddered and ‘pin-balled’ against his cranium. The change was swift yet lasting as Kai barely kept his senses in check. Pinching his thigh from inside his pocket helped a bit.
Grudgingly, Kai owed his [Gamer’s Mind] yet again.
Well, Kai had successfully endured the most painful moments. He cautiously glanced at his two soon-to-be victims. It wouldn’t do to show any signs of weakness against the devils—
They were still lost.
Okay.
Rude.
They wouldn’t lose anything by showing some reaction. Whatever! It worsened their sentences in Kai’s mind.
<<<>>>
Mikoto barely cared for the classes. She even had the Genjutsu Release mastered at the back of her hands. She couldn’t focus, and Kushina was the same. It was annoying. Mikoto would have never joined the Academy if she knew of its strange tradition.
Why can’t she befriend a boy without raising a couple of eyebrows in the classroom?
It only annoyed Mikoto—and hopefully—Kushina that the other girls in the classroom had basically decided they would do ‘it’ with Kai after their graduation. Why Kai, of all? She could maybe approach Hiruna. No. She didn’t like the boy, much less other Uchiha. The only Uchiha she had love and respect for was her father and none else.
Kushina’s past proclamations of opening ‘spots’ for Kai’s harem didn’t help their case either.
The recent demise of Nawaki drove the fact that not many may live to see past their early teens. Nawaki was merely the more renowned incident since many Genins died daily. With Konoha’s annual output of graduates, the village would have been crawling with thousands of Shinobi without any jobs had it not been for the baffling mortality rate.
However, it was life. They needed to kill to survive.
Such a lifestyle began a strange tradition since the seventh batch of graduates.
Huh?
Wasn’t that the year Jiraiya-Sensei graduated?
Anyway!
Mikoto should not have to sleep with others to maintain social expectations—especially with Kai!
They were kids.
Mikoto hoped that the eager students in the class would end the nonsense when Orochimaru-Sensei overlooked the female side of case studies in Tsunade’s temporary absence after Nawaki’s passing. The pale black-haired man was brutal and blunt with his knowledge as he left no injury or disease one could catch by unhealthy sexual practices unturned. Literally—Orochimaru went into the nitty gritty of vessels, bruises, tears, fatal infections, anal injuries and more!
Well, that only worked for a month.
‘Horni’ had a way to blind many.
Mikoto glanced to her side, noticing Kai idling. He was unusually dazed and clueless these days.
‘Did the other boys also speak to him about it?’
Mikoto couldn’t wrap her head around the lecture as she clenched the ends of her shirt and lowered her head with a flushed expression.
No wonder Kai looked so distracted since the beginning of November.
‘Does he think about me?’ She batted an eyelash before peeking at him with a lowered head. Her expression blanked since all she met was Kushina in a similar posture. The duo’s black and violet hues met before they blushed beet red and straightened their backs.
How embarrassing.
Still, Mikoto confirmed Kushina wasn’t any better.
Tch.
Why do Kai and Kushina bathe together?
Isn’t that a conflict of interest?
What if Kai had feelings for Kushina?
Who was she kidding?
Of course, Kai had a thing for Kushina. They were inseparable.
Mikoto puckered her lips and pouted as she bumped her shoulder against his.
“Say,” Mikoto whispered. “Did you get taller?”
“Finally noticed?” Kai promptly smirked. Mikoto didn’t let her expression betray her feelings about how cute it was when he puffed his chest.
“I’m going to overtake you two soon and make you sorry. Keke~! Don’t bother apologizing now. I’m gonna pinch your cheeks red and play with your heads.”
Kai didn’t bother controlling his volume as Kushina gaped. The redhead's eyes quivered as she snapped.
“What’s with that naughty talk, Kai-chan?!” The girl promptly reprimanded. It was Kushina’s job to keep the boy in check, even if she admirably failed at it.
But—
“Please don’t shout!” Mikoto snapped in embarrassment.
The Uchiha Princess felt several stares at the back of her head, some amused and some frustrated.
“Ah, it’s you three. Couldn’t even wait till enduring the 30-minute mark today, eh?” Icha glanced at the trio. “Get out.” He was as cool as a block of ice as he turned to the blackboard and continued the lecture.
The trio habitually left the classroom with a neat order, picked their buckets, and glared at each other.
It was routine.
“The fuck’s gotten into you?” Kai flared at Kushina as she looked away and shuffled her feet ever so slightly.
“Shut up!” The redhead barely whispered. “Don’t think I don’t know!”
Mikoto hurriedly interjected. Let’s not turn things awkward beyond repair—
“You know?” Kai blinked, making Kushina and Mikoto pause.
The trio exchanged a glance before Kai touched his chin.
“Wait. Are you talking about my plans once I get taller or the weird sex thing going on in the classroom with many other students?”
Kushina and Mikoto gaped.
Did that mean his plans after getting taller did NOT involve anything risque?
Then what was the talk about the head?
It was selective hearing at its best.
“So? Sex thing?” Kai noted the awkwardness. “Didn’t Orochimaru-san already tell us it’s stupid for us to let fear guide our decisions? Maybe he didn’t. He only took your classes a few times, right?”
“No, he did tell us,” Mikoto mumbled as the trio descended into a strange silence.
“So, did you have fun perving on us?” Kushina ended her words with a scoff and looked at her feet.
“On you?” Kai crinkled his eyes. “What should I fantasize about? Your farts after ramen that leave the loudest fire-nature release to shame?”
Shock overtook Kushina’s expression as she kicked at Kai.
It was a fruitless attempt. Kushina stopped after a while before scowling.
“Don’t speak about that!”
“Why are you acting like others don’t rip fat ones?” Kai tilted his head before shrugging. “Still. I didn’t bother about it. No way the threat of death makes me want to settle for anyone I don’t like.”
The trio fell into another bout of silence as Kushina kept slicing Mikoto with her gaze until the latter relented.
Mikoto cleared her throat.
“Anyone you like—”
“Tsunade.”
Mikoto and Kushina fell silent before the Uchiha flatly glared.
“That was a quick reply, Kai-chan.”
“Well,” Kai placed the buckets on the floor before crossing his arms. “I thought about a few others. But I’m too young. Others won’t take me as a serious candidate to replace their husbands even if I lift my looks with early puberty. So, I have to do something awesome.”
Mikoto and Kushina exchanged a worried glance before the more sensible within the duo broached the topic.
“Shouldn’t you focus on your training?”
Kai looked at Mikoto before questioning.
“Why do you want to be a Shinobi?”
“To become a kunoichi as accomplished as Tsunade-sama,” Mikoto puffed her chest.
“And what then?” Kai grinned.
“Then?”
“Yep,” Kai tapped his dome. “What should I do once I surpass everyone? Why do I train? Well, I enjoy training. But my goals are beyond your understanding.”
Kushina pouted.
“You only want to do naughty things!”
Kai froze before clearing his throat.
“Maybe my goals aren’t beyond your understanding.”
The duo felt speechless.
“So,” Kai looked at the girls. “Was that why you two were so distant?” Kushina and Mikoto winced at his words. It’s not like they wanted to feel distant. However, the girls in their class did a number on the duo’s thoughts.
“Listen,” Kai giggled as he rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Tsume, Kuromaru, and you two are the only friends I have. Minato’s more of an appreciative competitor, so he doesn’t count. Still, I never thought anything weird.”
Kai almost panicked. How would he bully those Uchiha runts if he lost his only access to—
Nah, he had to stop lying internally for the sake of it.
They were his friends. Kai didn’t want to lose them.
That’s all.
“Really?” Kushina questioned, barely hiding a note of disappointment.
“Well, duh. You know what? I’m willing to share my secrets on keeping my thoughts in check.”
Yep. Kai could trust them. Especially, Kushina.
They had a tight bond, and Kai adored the fart machine.
So, he beckoned the girls to get closer before whispering eldritch knowledge into their ears. Of course, Kai didn’t have the cheek to admit he wanked off on Mito’s clone. However, others were fair game.
Kushina’s and Mikoto’s gaze froze before they mechanically leaned back.
“I’m telling Tsunade-san,” Kushina whispered.
“What? Are you crazy?!”
“It’s for your good, Kai-chan,” Mikoto supported the idea. “Or maybe we should also let Mito-Sama know?”
Kushina looked at Mikoto.
“Both?”
Mikoto nodded.
“Both is good.”
“You two are ruthless bitches,” Kai huffed. “I was lying to test you. See? All my trust wasted on you two.”
Mikoto and Kushina looked at Kai. Their gazes were somber.
“We don’t trust you. You… you probably transformed every girl! You beast!” Mikoto blushed.
“Yeah! I can’t believe we bathe together! Y-You’re going to wear clothes from now on!”
Kai pointed out.
“Shouldn’t you be the one—”
“I’m not done!” Kushina stuttered. “I forbid you to look at Tsunade-san! No! No more looking at her breasts! What’s so good about her? She’s a virgin, too!”
Kai shrugged. “Do you know others like Tsunade who haven’t done the deed?”
Kushina chewed her bottom lip as clumps of red hair began floating behind her.
“Kushina is right,” Mikoto couldn’t meet Kai’s gaze. Maybe he did it for everyone in the class. After all, he wanted a harem.
“We promise not to tell Tsunade-sama if you promise not to do it again.”
“Sure,” Kai lied as easily as he breathed.
“Promise?” Kushina’s eyes widened, and her hair rested for good.
“Promise,” Kai nodded.
“How can we be sure?” Mikoto narrowed her eyes in suspicion.
“I don’t know. I shared something others didn’t know, and you two weaponized it against me. How can I trust you?”
For all her wrath, Kushina was quick to suppress. So, Kai began from her with a pointed glare.
“Sorry,” she looked away in guilt. How could she call Kai her trusted ally after such an act? No, she needed damage control.
“Call it even?” She rested her widened gaze against Kai until he scoffed.
“Sure,” Kai grunted. “But no more squishing my cheeks.”
“But!” Kushina cried in outrage. “No. Impossible! I’ll settle for not making you sit on my lap.”
Kai almost coughed blood. Kushina probably had a chunin’s limit with how effortlessly she manhandled him outside of spars.
“Fine,” Kai clicked his tongue before looking at the shocked Mikoto.
“And you.” Kai glared.
“What?” Mikoto raised an eyebrow. She was never easy.
“You can tell Tsunade-san if you want to. However, that wouldn’t change a thing, you know?” Kai grinned. Emotional blackmail it was then. “I might double down on it. My grades and focus will wither, and I might become a bitter man like Head Buttler Tenjin. Is that what you want? Huh? Are you such a friend?”
Mikoto looked away.
“Of course not,” she muttered. “Well, fine. I won’t tell Tsunade-sama anything. However, you have to tell us what other boys told you.”
“Hmm? Why does that matter?”
“It just does!” Mikoto stammered.
Kai nodded before chuckling.
“What?” Kushina blinked.
“Nah. It’s just funny now that I think about it,” Kai picked up the buckets again. “I mean the boys you like in the classroom. They must be in for some tough time, given how much you two annoy me.”
He continued giggling as Kushina and Mikoto glanced at each other before looking down.
Damn, the floor is looking hella neat today.
<<<>>>
As it turned out, Kai worried for nothing about Kushina and Mikoto exposing him. Well, he wasn’t worried. They never snitched on him before. It was more about talking them down that pleased them, and Kai relented for once since they had been feeling awkward.
As for his monkey business?
“Pfft! Hahahahaha! You were right!” Tsunade couldn’t control her laughter as she hugged Mito, barely noticing the sensation of how her grandma currently felt. “Who knew that genius had such a bug for me? There’s a normal crush, and then there’s this. Two hours, you say?”
“Sometimes more,” Mito sighed. She didn’t admit her direct surveillance but merely alluded to the heavy ‘emotions’ she felt from Kai’s rooms for hours once Tsunade visited.
Tsunade had barely moved on from her loss and threw herself to work. So, she visited less and less. Mito wanted to make each meeting count.
Besides! Kai owed her.
No. Mito didn’t mean anything about adopting the boy. That would be pretty low.
However, the damn brat had used her face as his personal target practice for months now!
“I wonder what he uses to jerk off,” Tsunade grinned and remained unrepentantly blunt. She was always like that until she found her match. Then she would be a blushing, airheaded mess—like the time when she met Dan.
“I wouldn’t know,” Mito lied.
“Well,” Tsunade exhaled before raising an eyebrow. “That makes things fun. Sensei told us we’d be getting new teammates from Kai’s batch. I didn’t mind Kai landing in Orochimaru’s team before.”
The blonde exhaled at Orochimaru’s recollection. “Well, I’m owed some fun if the boy’s using me for his wet dreams.”
Mito blanked out.
What had she done?
Kai would ALWAYS spend hours in his room once forced to be near Tsunade daily.
“GRAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Get face-fucked, bitch!”
Well…
‘Mito’ had been a few inches away from the tool to experience that, too.
“So,” Tsunade returned to her chair and crossed her legs. “Are you fine with Kai’s graduation?”
For all her brash exterior, Tsunade remained as sensible as ever. She knew how dearly Mito felt for Kai.
“I’m sure he won’t be so easy to kill,” Mito sighed.
“Oh? I thought he wasn’t ready for Chakra Infused Seals yet,” Tsunade blinked as she wondered how Kai had completed years’ worth of course in months.
“That doesn’t mean Kai wasted his time,” Mito rolled her eyes.
“Unless I visited,” Tsunade grinned. “I ought to visit more then.”
“Do whatever you wish, dear,” Mito smiled. “You’re always welcome here.”
“Thanks,” Tsunade exchanged a similar smile.
‘Huh,’ Tsunade lost herself in her thoughts. ‘I remember offering Kai a gift. I wonder if he’ll have the same response—nah. I shouldn’t distract the boy.’
Indeed.
For all her impish exterior, Tsunade did not want to distract Kai. She wanted him to train. More and MORE!
She didn’t want Mito to experience another loss.
And yeah, Tsunade would also be bummed out at Kai’s death.
‘Still. Kai’s a certified genius. I should wait for the Genjutsu Release training before assessing his talent and see if he has the same stuff for iryo-ninjutsu.’
Tsunade wasn’t worried about Kai’s talent. The boy prevailed over students with years of training in mere months. He could handle the workload.
Tsunade’s only issue was the competition between Orochimaru and Jiraiya.
It turns out that the boy impressed every student under Lord Third’s tutelage.
***
Alternate Title: The Foundation; The Whorls; Training Ends When He Wants To; The Youthful Sparring; Refreshing Opponent; One The Rise; The Eye; PAIN; Kai’s Jealous; The Distant Girls; Orochimaru: Today’s Lesson, Trauma; Some Attention Would Have Been Nice; Kai’s Words And Actions Never Match; Kai’s Never Getting Taller, Is He?; The Distracted Girls; The Orgy Rituals; Of Course, Jiraiya Had Something To Do With It; Jiraiya *To Other Classmates*: Did You Know About This Really Cool Tradition in Kirigakure?; The Sex Rituals; Minato and Kai Are Too OP For Sex (They Are Socially Awkward As Fuck and Have Better Chances With Each Other); Kushina and Mikoto: You Are Going To Do WHAT With Our Heads?; The Habit Of Getting Tossed Out of Class; Mikoto’s Perfect Records Never Stood a Chance Against Kai; Mikoto and Kushina In the Future: Don’t Misunderstand. There’s No Other Suitable Candidate; Kai: The Best Way To Overcome Lust Is By Releasing It. Feel Free To Use My Transformation; Kai: The Man’s Unlucky If You Like Them *Also Kai: Experiences a Hike In Unlucky Incidents*; The Emotionally Stunted Rizz Goes Crazy; Kai: I’m a Blackhole, Huh; The Fart Machine Just Farts… Menacingly; The Bootleg Sharingan; Mito Exposes Kai; Kushina And Mikoto Never Snitched; The Ride of Die Friends; Friendzoned; Kai: Sex? Sure. When I’m Taller And Have Won a War Or Something; The Reasonable Tsunade; Mito’s Getting Back In This One; Mito Shot Herself In The Foot; Kai’s Never Emerging From His Room
***
A/N: It would have been easy to just make Tsunade woo Kai, but it would have been awkward. It just felt better to make Tsunade more level-headed despite her fun nature. We’ll have all the time with Kai in Tsunade’s team, kek.
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