PTSD Military Chaplain of the Academy

“Ha… I almost fainted in the classroom.”

After introducing myself, a sudden thunderous applause erupted, which surprised me a bit. I almost took cover behind the lectern without realizing it.

The sound of artillery fire like that of a howitzer, and the gunfire striking my ears right next to me. All those bursting sounds, including the applause, constantly conjured up bad memories. For me, that popping noise was a haunting melody.

I was fine during the entrance ceremony since I had just taken some medicine, but not now.

My steps toward the campus dining hall felt heavy. I adjusted the heavy theology book in my left hand. Cold sweat had started to bead on my forehead.

“Handkerchief, handkerchief… oh.”

As I rummaged in my pocket with my right hand to take out a handkerchief, my arm began to tremble and stiffen. As a result, the handkerchief fell to the floor.

“…Damn it.”

My right arm continued to shake relentlessly. Reflexively, I pressed down on my right arm with my left hand. It was only natural that the theology books I was holding in my left hand tumbled to the floor.

As I stood awkwardly against the wall, pressing my arm down, passing students shot me weird looks.

After a moment of pressing down on my right arm, the spasms began to subside. I let out a sigh and gathered the theology books that had spilled onto the floor.

Just as I barely managed to gather the theology books and was about to pick up the handkerchief that had fallen to the floor,

Swoosh—.

A dark blue braided hair flickered in front of me. A pair of white hands caught the handkerchief I was about to pick up and handed it to me.

“Professor Lucio. Are you alright?”

The person who appeared as my savior was Esther Garrett, my academy lunch mate.

***

“Thank you for earlier.”

“What for? But, why did you suddenly…?”

I set down my fork and met Esther’s gaze. Her mysterious purple eyes were staring at me intently.

“What do you mean?”

“You were walking down the hallway on the other side, and suddenly, Professor Lucio, didn’t you make a scene in the hallway? I was wondering if something happened.”

“A scene….”

I made a perplexed expression. Esther chuckled like a mischievous child.

“Hehe… I was just joking. Just joking.”

“No, I surely did make a scene.”

“Huh? I was joking, you know?”

“I see. I understand.”

“So, really, why did it happen?”

“…….”

It was a wound I received during the Great War. Shrapnel from a shell lodged in my shoulder. I injured the nerves and fascia in my right shoulder, resulting in a permanent disability.

…But I couldn’t say that even if it killed me. I felt like the meal I had eaten would come back up.

“It just happened suddenly; I had a cramp.”

“…Hmm.”

“It’s true.”

Esther, who was chewing chicken as if she were displeased with my answer, stared at me intently. This time, her fork moved to a plate of salad.

“…Well, let’s just leave it at that. I guess it’s not time yet.”

“Thank you for understanding.”

After eating salad like a rabbit, Esther took a sip of water and pointed to the stack of theology books beside my plate.

“By the way, how was your first class?”

“My impression, you mean?”

What impression? Did she want to hear that I almost wet myself because of the applause?

When I grimaced and asked back, Esther shrugged her shoulders and continued speaking.

“Of course, it was a class at the Caldera Imperial Academy, right? Even I, coming from an academy in a small city, was sweating bullets. The level of student questions is on another level. Thanks to that, I struggled to adjust the difficulty….”

“Isn’t it the case that you are attending the same academy as me?”

“Excuse me?”

Hearing that made me suddenly think of Laura von Adelheit, who had laughed cruelly with a smirk. The aristocrat’s daughter was throwing barbed questions at me with an inexplicable hostility.

The level of questions is on another level… huh.

I somewhat agreed, of course, but I believed Esther meant it positively.

“It was manageable. There wasn’t particularly anything difficult in preparing for the class.”

“Impressive. The other professors still sweat bullets just preparing exam questions at that time of year.”

“I’m not that remarkable. I can’t even compare myself to the other professors.”

Esther narrowed her eyes and looked at me. As I stared back without understanding, Esther eventually averted her gaze and let out a sigh.

“Professor Lucio, you need to have a bit more confidence.”

“Is that so?”

“This is the Caldera Imperial Academy, after all! It’s the top-notch academy that produces members of the royal family every year, and nobles from neighboring countries desperately want to enroll! You started building your first career at such a place, so that’s all there is to it!”

I had indeed heard the reputation of the Caldera Imperial Academy. However, I couldn’t figure out why I had been able to get a job here.

Even recalling how I had approached the interview, my attitude didn’t seem that great. Honestly, I thought there was no chance I would be hired.

The only surprising part was that Dean Damian seemed to know about my combat experience before I even brought it up.

“Maybe… yes. Looking back, it was nonsense. How did I even get hired?”

“Nooo… I told you to have confidence, and instead, you seem to have crawled even lower….”

Esther was picking at her salad with a dejected expression. After watching her for a moment, I picked up my plate that still had a little food left and stood up.

“I’m sorry. Excuse me, but I think I need to take my leave.”

“Um… why? You haven’t finished eating yet….”

“I’m not hungry, and I also need to stop by the Seminary Main Chapel.”

“Ahh… that’s true….”

Thinking about it, even though I had become the Head Priest at the Seminary Main Chapel, I hadn’t thought to visit there yet. Since there was still a bit of lunchtime left, I was planning to visit the Seminary Main Chapel while taking a walk.

“Then I’ll go with you! Just a moment! I’m almost done eating…!”

“Take your time.”

I organized the dining table and slowly walked out of the dining hall. Esther, with her cheeks full, hurriedly followed behind me.

“Ah, wait! My hat!”

“…….”

Thanks to Esther forgetting her cone hat in the dining hall, we had a little delay.

***

When Esther and I arrived at the Seminary Main Chapel, we strolled slowly outside the church. There were benches everywhere for resting, and the landscaping was well-maintained, making it aesthetically beautiful.

“It’s really enormous. It could easily stand beside the churches in the city center.”

“Is that so?”

“Yes. Well, it doesn’t even make sense that a separate church exists dedicated to the academy.”

The Caldera Imperial Academy, being exceptionally famous in the Empire, boasts an academy grounds of unimaginable size.

And naturally, a church dedicated to the academy emerged on such a massive campus. The Seminary Main Chapel is that very place.

“Yes, indeed. At my previous academy, there was no church, so the professors of theology had a hard time. The theology students were uncomfortable, too.”

“Indeed….”

After a moment of looking around the church, we entered inside the church.

Then, the largest space in this Seminary Main Chapel revealed itself to us first.

“This is the chapel.”

“Wow….”

The stained glass glowed with radiant colors as it caught the sunlight. This sight, combined with the tranquil atmosphere of the church, created an aura of grandeur.

Inside the chapel, several clerics, already dressed in their priestly robes, and a few students who seemed to be from the theology department were engaged in prayer. The clerics wearing priestly robes were likely other theology professors from the academy.

As Esther and I entered the chapel, a few theology professors glanced our way and nodded respectfully. I also quietly nodded in response to their greetings.

Although I had been appointed the Head Priest of this Seminary Main Chapel, it seemed that the existing theology professors did not harbor any jealousy towards me. Their gazes seemed indifferent, as if it didn’t matter much.

They understood well that being the head priest—especially in an academy chapel filled with various incidents and accidents caused by clueless students—was not merely a good position. It was a shared understanding among peers in the same line of work.

“I’m planning to go to the Head Priest’s office. As for you, Professor Esther….”

“Can I really go to such a place?”

“Professor Esther, I am the Head Priest here.”

“…Ah.”

Esther’s cheeks turned bright red as she asked me anxiously. She seemed embarrassed for asking such a foolish question.

I chuckled softly and moved my feet slowly. There was no reason to disturb those quietly praying.

I wondered how long it had been. Once we ascended to the second floor of the church, we quickly found the Head Priest’s office. I placed my hand on the doorknob….

– …as we ask that You fill our hearts with Your grace… as we pray to You, our Lord who has saved us….

“…Hmm?”

“What’s wrong?”

From inside the Head Priest’s office, a mysterious voice was mumbling. As I halted my hand from turning the doorknob, Esther peeked her head out as if asking what was up.

“…Do you not hear anything?”

“What sound… huh?”

– …Today is the first day I meet the Head Priest. I pray for the Head Priest who will firmly support the Seminary Main Chapel….

“Someone? No, wait… is that a prayer?”

It seemed someone was praying inside the Head Priest’s office. Unintentionally, I clicked my tongue and swung the door open wildly.

“Today, may there be grace like a gentle rain…. Ugh!”

In the middle of the Head Priest’s office, a girl kneeling down in prayer stared at me with wide eyes. No, shouldn’t I be the one astonished?

I carefully examined her face. A girl with striking golden chin-length hair and emerald-like clear green eyes. She wore a white sash over her black priestly robe.

“…What is this? Professor Lucio, do you know her?”

Esther pressed close to me, asking me with a hint of an accusation. Even if she asked me like that….

“Um, who are you?”

I had no idea who she was.

“I don’t know who you are, but this is the Head Priest’s office. You shouldn’t come in recklessly.”

“…Are you, by any chance, Senior Priest Lucio Antorelli?”

“That’s correct. And who might you be?”

Since she didn’t seem to be a student, I added the title “sister.” The attire with the white sash diagonally worn indicates the clothing of sub-priests.

She cleared her throat and, placing her hands on her waist confidently, announced,

“I am Sister Sofia, sent here as the assigned sub-priest to the Head Priest! I was just tidying up before your arrival and was about to say the pre-meal prayer!”

With a face that looked barely over eighteen. She seemed to have been appointed as a sub-priest right after graduating from the theology academy in the Holy Empire. By the way, the pre-meal prayer?

“…The pre-meal prayer?”

“Yes!”

A cheerfully enthusiastic answer. I couldn’t help but smack my forehead.

“Why aren’t you eating at the academy dining hall instead…?”

“Um, the thing is…. I lost my sub-priest appointment letter on my way from the Holy Empire to here…. Unconfirmed outsiders cannot eat at the academy dining hall….”

“Let’s go to the dining hall first.”

We headed back to the dining hall.

Somehow, I had a strong feeling that a troublesome situation had arisen.

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